BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike

Subject: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: JenEllen
Date: 15 Jan 00 - 07:20 PM

A friend sent me this message....after being here for a while, I realized just how true it is. Feel free to add you own observations. Luv, Elle

Why Dogs and 'Catters are Alike

1. Both keep going, even when they are hopelessly lost
2. Both take up too much space in the bed
3. Both have irrational fears about vacuum cleaners
4. Both do the dishes by licking them clean
5. The larger ones tend to drool
6. The smaller ones tend to be nervous
7. They both understand if some of their friends aren't allowed to come inside
8. They both like beer
9. Neither one wants to know about every dog you've ever had
10. Their time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink
11. They don't mind if you want to give their offspring away
12. They both enjoy heavy petting in public

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: fulurum
Date: 15 Jan 00 - 07:38 PM

wow. talk abou the perfect pshycological profile. its almost like your looking in my window.

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: catspaw49
Date: 15 Jan 00 - 07:40 PM

It must be something in the air tonight.

"Hey Skiff....We got another one here for the Young Center. Order up the Insanevac chopper."

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: Musicman
Date: 15 Jan 00 - 08:05 PM

Ok, that hit the spot.....

Here's another one for you......

Feeling old today??

Just in case you weren't feeling too old today, this will certainly change things. Each year the staff at Beloit College in Wisconsin puts together a list to try to give the faculty a sense of the mindset of that year's incoming freshmen.

Here is this year's list:
The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born in1980.
They have no meaningful recollection of the Reagan Era and probably did not know he had ever been shot.
They were prepubescent when the Persian Gulf War was waged.
Black Monday 1987 is as significant to them as the Great Depression.
There has been only one Pope.
They were 11 when the Soviet Union broke apart and do not remember the Cold war.
They have never feared a nuclear war.
They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up.
Their lifetime has always included AIDS.
Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.
Atari predates them, as do vinyl albums.
The expression "you sound like a broken record" means nothing to them.
They have never owned a record player.
They have likely never played Pac Man and have never heard of Pong.
They may have never heard of an 8 track.
The Compact Disc was introduced when they were 1 year old.
As far as they know, stamps have always cost about 32 cents.
They have always had an answering machine.
Most have never seen a TV set with only 13 channels nor have they seen a black-and-white TV.
They have always had cable.
There has always been VCR's, but they have no idea what BETA is.
They cannot fathom not having a remote control.
They were born the year that Walkmen were introduced by Sony.
Roller-skating has always meant inline for them.
Jay Leno has always been on the Tonight Show.
They have no idea when or why Jordache jeans were cool.
Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.
They have never seen Larry Bird play.
They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.
The Vietnam War is as ancient history to the as WWI, WWII and the Civil War.
They have no idea that Americans were ever held hostage in Iran.
They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.
They don't know who Mork was or where he was from.
They never heard: "Where's the beef?", "I'd walk a mile for a Camel," or "deplane, de plane!"
They do not care who shot J.R. and have no idea who J.R. is.
The Titanic was found? They thought we always knew where it was.
Michael Jackson has always been white.
Kansas, Chicago, Boston, America, and Alabama are places, not music groups.
McDonald's never came in Styrofoam containers.
There has always been MTV.
They don't have a clue of how to use a typewriter.

Do you feel old yet? Pass this on to other ancient ones...

Did I ruin someone's day?.... Sorry.....

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: Sorcha
Date: 15 Jan 00 - 08:22 PM

OH God, that IS scary! And these kids are going to be running the world?

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: JenEllen
Date: 15 Jan 00 - 08:31 PM

Scary, but true....story of my life

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: Dave (the ancient mariner)
Date: 15 Jan 00 - 08:41 PM

Woof...Us old dogs will live long enough to help the pups get it right, Yours, (old English Bulldog)Aye. Dave

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: JenEllen
Date: 15 Jan 00 - 08:42 PM

Dodging the butterfly nets coming from the chopper....

They both also find you amusing when you are drunk

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: Clinton Hammond2
Date: 15 Jan 00 - 08:50 PM

That list... a lot of it reads like blessings to me... Like never knowing the crud that was 8track... And as a lifelong Levi's man, Ihad no idea the Jordache was EVER cool!! LOL!!!

And I'd kill to have no memory of the Regan era!!!

But it's a wonderful idea for the fac. to do...

;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: _gargoyle
Date: 15 Jan 00 - 09:09 PM

Sorcha ....

They may be running world but............They won't be running the world for my generation....

Most everyone I know .... believes that retirement is for the sick, feeble, and lazy .... Like Allen Greenspan we plan to keep going and going and going.... and the "youth" will only get control when they rip it from our cold-dead-fingers.

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: JenEllen
Date: 15 Jan 00 - 09:12 PM

Gargoyle....are you Strom Thurmond???

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: Mbo
Date: 15 Jan 00 - 09:35 PM

Hey! I'm a junior in college and know most of the things the list says my generation doesn't. Incidentally Chicago, Alabama, Kansas, Boston and America are some of my favorite music groups ever!

--Mbo

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: fulurum
Date: 15 Jan 00 - 10:59 PM

don't worry. they said the same about us. and my older brothers generation hasn't turned over the reins to us so we can have our shot at screwing up the world.

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: Bugsy
Date: 15 Jan 00 - 11:16 PM

I do not subscribe to this belief that Dogs and 'Catters are alike.

I have NEVER licked my balls in public (or private, for that matter) nor have I ever cocked my leg up on a lamp post or sniffed another 'Catters behind.

Then again, maybe I don't get around enough!

Cheers

Bugsy

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: Escamillo
Date: 15 Jan 00 - 11:43 PM

Sorcha, what is really scary is that who are now running the world are WE.
Un abrazo - Andrés Magré

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: Metchosin
Date: 16 Jan 00 - 01:45 AM

Bugsy, I didn't think there was a link between Dogs and 'Catters either, until I realized that since I've been spayed, I have thickened around the middle a bit and if I am honest, my love of thrift stores belies the fact that I love to root through my neighbours garbage.

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: paddymac
Date: 16 Jan 00 - 02:23 AM

Bugsy - ever hear of - what the heck is his name - that Atlanta writer/comic whose ex-wives equaled the number of his open heart surgeries. He was well-known as an after-dinner speaker, and used to tell a story about Uga, the bulldog fated to be the University of Georgia mascot. As the story goes, an inebriated alum saw Uga licking his balls on the sideline during a football game. The alum turned to his buddy and said: "Man, I sure wish I could do that." His slightly-less-inebriated buddy replied: "Man, that dog will bite you." Appropos of nothing, but your comment reminded me of it. Ah, well, keep dreaming.

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: Bugsy
Date: 16 Jan 00 - 03:20 AM

Metchosin - You are right in that respect, I had my tools nicked myself some 20 years ago. The only problem was the wife wouldn't let me wear a Vasectomy tie. She said I could only wear one if she could cut it off under the knot! A regular comedienne, my missus!! Paddymac - The version I heard was "I wish I could do that". and his mate said "Chuck him a dog biscuit and he might let you"

Cheers

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: johnp
Date: 16 Jan 00 - 03:46 AM

Metchosin....here in NZ "rooting" has a different usage.It is a common term for copulation.

Please do not move in next door.

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: Bugsy
Date: 16 Jan 00 - 03:51 AM

Johnp - no need to worry, whilst he is "rooting through your garbage" at least you know your sheep will be safe!

Cheers

Bugsy

wholivesalmostnextdoorinwesternaustralia

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: Metchosin
Date: 16 Jan 00 - 04:34 AM

He's a she Bugsy, hence the spaying reference.

johnp...Jeez ya half to be so careful with this international thing going on here...Well at least with being spayed, if I was in England I wouldn't have to worry about being "knocked up in the morning"....and your sheep are safe, even if I did move in next door, I'm in sheep country here too and so far I've shown no interest.

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: Bugsy
Date: 16 Jan 00 - 05:50 AM

WHOOOOOOOOOOOPS!!!

Cheers

bugsy

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: paddymac
Date: 16 Jan 00 - 11:37 AM

johnp - the NZ use of the word "rooting" makes me chuckle when I think of the expression "rooting for the home team". Of course, it's better (one would hope, anyway) than "pulling for the home team". :>)

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: Mbo
Date: 16 Jan 00 - 11:53 AM

The comedian you're thinking of was the late great Lewis Grizzard, a favorite of my family. One of my most favorite columns was about dropping dead in the parking lot of Waffle House.

--Mbo

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: johnp
Date: 16 Jan 00 - 04:55 PM

This thread was about cats and dogs...no more of this sheep innuendo...thats personal

For more help in the avoidance of US/UK word usage click me gently

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 16 Jan 00 - 05:01 PM

So does that bring us back to the Mexican Hairless then??

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: johnp
Date: 16 Jan 00 - 05:04 PM

click me gently

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: Peter T.
Date: 16 Jan 00 - 05:24 PM

Why Catters are like Cats and not like Dogs:

They do not look at you with adoring eyes. Rather they give you sardonic appraisals.
They have lives of their own, to which you are an occasional contributor
Work is for suckers and sheepdogs. They will not bring you your newspaper, or slippers. They will occasionally drop a chewed small something or other in a conspicuous place.
When given an official place to pee, they will pee extremely close to it, but never quite at the right place.
They have claws that they use when provoked, or whenever things are getting too complacent, or when new curtains have been hung.
They sing very loudly to their beloveds at 3:00 in the morning to the consternation of the neighbours.
They have been know to frequent cathouses (I know, obvious as hell, but I couldn't leave it off, could I?)

yours, Peter T.

Subject: RE: BS: Why Dogs and 'Catters are alike
From: JenEllen
Date: 16 Jan 00 - 06:02 PM

Oh Peter! Delightful! The sheep thing was beginning to worry me a bit. I'm sorry, but it was truly more than I needed to know about you guys...Reminded me of the joke about the difference between a Scotsman and the Rolling Stones. One is "Hey you, Get off my Cloud" and the other is "Hey McCloud, get off my Ewe"...