Lyr Req: Liquefied Manure Truck

Subject: RE: LIQUEFIED MANURE TRUCK LYRICS
From: Curlie Cornflake
Date: 21 Feb 00 - 06:25 AM

Oh Yes! This is what we want!

Subject: RE: LIQUEFIED MANURE TRUCK LYRICS
From: GUEST,Chris/Darwin (at work)
Date: 21 Feb 00 - 02:40 AM

Stewie

I have a vague recollection of hearing this somewhere. Is there anywhere I can get the tune?

Regards
Chris

Subject: RE: LIQUEFIED MANURE TRUCK LYRICS
From: GUEST,LDB
Date: 20 Feb 00 - 08:22 PM

LIZ

Sure would like to hear the details on that "slurry trucks, a country lane and a poseur in an open topped sports car, trying to impress his girlfriend..." Sound like a mudcat kinda story!!

LDB

Subject: Lyr Add: EDDIE BAKER'S MUCKSPREADER^^
From: Stewie
Date: 20 Feb 00 - 07:36 PM

Here you go. It's something of an epic - I'll probably have RSI by the time I finish typing it.

EDDIE BAKER'S MUCKSPREADER
(John Kirkpatrick)

Now in My-tholm-royd in Yorkhire, one Saturday in June
All the village was preparing for the fete that afternoon
There were sideshows, stalls and roundabouts and every kind of game
But the village fete will never now be quite the same
For this pleasant country scene was transformed by a machine
Which belonged to Eddie Baker from the farm just down the road
With his tractor and his trailer and his load both sweet and pure
Five hundred imperial gallons of best liquified manure

Chorus:
Down the road went Eddie Baker in his rattling old boneshaker
And he never knew the trail he left behind him

Now Eddie quickly picked up speed on the track from Lower Lumb Farm
Though his load careered madly he never thought 'twould come to harm
And so noisy was the clatter and the crashes and the booms
He had to turn his old transistor up so he could hear the tunes
As he zoomed across a bump it triggered off the trailer's pump
And its hose discovered freedom it had never known before
It waved wildly round and round, from side to side and up and down
As spreading dung and desperation, Eddie sailed into the town

Chorus

Now Jemima Smith and Barney from down the old folks' home
Were on their way to a lunchtime tipple at the Peacock and Trombone
She was adjusting of her spectacles to a admire a garden rose
When a blast from Eddie's onslaught whipped 'em right from off her nose
'Oh, gawd', says old Jemima, 'I've just had a funny turn
Oo , I feel or cold and clammy and how my skin does burn'
'Oh, speak up, dear', says Barney, as together they did cling
'It's short-circuited me deaf-aid, I can't hear a bleeding thing

Chorus

Now the Icecream Factory Silver Band were warming up to play
To commence the celebrations of that very special day
When there appeared on their music dots they couldn't play too well
As with the gentle tang of Brasso mingled a new exciting smell
And their tunes all went awry as they hung 'em out to dry
And the sousaphone player played his last 'cause he sucked when he should have blowed
There were different tunes in different times and all in different keys
And 'Nellie the Elephant' sounded more like 'The Flight of the Bumble Bee'

Chorus

Now the greasy pole was greasier than ever known before
And the icecream had a chocolate sauce no palate could ignore
And into the coffee-coloured candy-floss Grannie Walker plunged her teeth
And for evermore the ones on top were stuck to the ones beneath
And in the tug-o-war there were broken bones galore
There was blood all round the bottle stall as both teams slithered through
There was chaos round the cake stall and the tea was more like glue
'Cause you didn't just get sugar when they asked, 'One lump or two?'

Chorus

Now Geraldine the Carnival Queen was looking all forlorn
She got browner than she bargained for as she sunbathed on the lawn
And it gave a fatal heart attack to next-door's pekinese
Whilst upon its back a skating match took place among its fleas
And the force of the cascade swept through the goldfish of Miss Blade
Right up into the hanging basket down at number twenty-three
And it dumped the Johnson's tortoise in the bird bath at the Jones'
And wiped the smile right off the faces of their plastic garden gnomes

Chorus

Now the Reverend Roderick Butterworth was sitting down to eat
When the perilous plague of pestilence came belting down the street
Some of it fell among the thorns, some fell on stony ground
And some fell on his car outside with all his windows down
'Oh, bugger!', said the vicar, as he swigged some demon liquor
'I suppose we should be thankful that it's not St Swithin's Day
But even my insurance doesn't cover act of God
And I know the scouts are going to say, "Stuff this for bob-a-job"'

Chorus

So he trundled through the village, down the road and past the hall
And where he'd been for years after all the weeds grew ten feet tall
And he never knew the chaos that he'd caused along his way
And he never heard the crashes as he crossed the motorway
And in time he'll dwell on high in that great muckheap in the sky
Where St Peter'll dive for cover every time he passes by
It'll rust up all their haloes, it'll clog up all their wings
As, wiping shit from off their faces, all the angels they will sing

Chorus

Published by Free Reed 1978.
Source: John Kirkpatrick 'Going Spare' Free Reed LP FRR 030.
PS.
^^

Cheers, Stewie.

Subject: RE: LIQUEFIED MANURE TRUCK LYRICS
From: Stewie
Date: 20 Feb 00 - 06:06 PM

The song you are looking for is probably John Kirkpatrick's 'Eddie Baker's Muckspreader'. I have the lyrics somewhere, but will need to find them.

--Stewie.

Subject: RE: LIQUEFIED MANURE TRUCK LYRICS
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 20 Feb 00 - 05:56 PM

See, I knew I wasn't the only Wurzel fan in the world, I was going to suggest the very same one.

There was a farmer who had an arguement with his bank manager over his account, so to get his own back the farmer took his liquefied manure or slurry truck to the village and turned the spreader on as he passed the bank. The building was completely covered in shite and the farmer had his account moved.....

True, honest....!

LTS, who has "fond" memories of slurry trucks, a country lane and a poseur in an open topped sports car, trying to impress his girlfriend.......

Subject: RE: LIQUEFIED MANURE TRUCK LYRICS
From:
Date: 20 Feb 00 - 04:29 PM

Only other similar song I know of, is "THE CHAMPION DUNG SPREADER" by the Wurzels.

Subject: RE: LIQUEFIED MANURE TRUCK LYRICS
From: Ferrara
Date: 20 Feb 00 - 11:37 AM

Thank you! Bob Hitchcock, of the New St. George, used to sing the "fling it here" song at our local open sings and I have missed it! - Rita F

Subject: RE: LIQUEFIED MANURE TRUCK LYRICS
From: sophocleese
Date: 20 Feb 00 - 10:17 AM

I DON'T KNOW IF THAT'S THE PARTICULAR ONE MEADOW MUSKRAT WAS ASKING FOR TERRY BUT, AS A LURKER, I THANK YOU VERY MUCH. GREAT WAY TO START A SUNDAY MORNING.

Subject: Lyr Add: FLING IT HERE, FLING IT THERE^^
From: TerriM
Date: 20 Feb 00 - 08:48 AM

Is this it?

FLING IT HERE, FLING IT THERE

Way down on our farm we are quite up to date
For mechanisation's the byword of late
For every task we've a gadget to match
But our new muck spreader's the best of the batch

Ch

Fling it here
Fling it there
If you're standing by then you'll all get your share

Now young Walter Hodgkins, he brought back a load
Of liquid manure from the farm up the road
And he hummed to himself as he drove up the street
And his load also hummed in the afternoon heat

Now his muck spreader had a mechanical fault
and a bump in the road turned it on with a jolt
An odorous spray of manure it let fly
Without fear or favour on all it passed by.

The cats and the dogs stank to high kingdom come
And the kiddies, browned off, ran home screaming to mum
The trail of sheer havoc were terrible grim
One open car were filled up to the brim

The vicarage windows were all open wide
When a generous helping descended inside
The vicar, at table, intoned "Let us pray"
When this manure from heaven came flying his way

In her garden Miss Pringle was quite scandalised
"Good Gracious!" she cried, "I've been fertilised"
While the Methodist minister's tee-total wife
Were plastered for the very first time in her life

And all of this time Walter trundled along
He was quite unaware there was anything wrong
Till a vision of woe flagged him down, what a sight!
A policeman all covered in sh--You've got it right!

(line breaks inserted by a Joe clone) ^^

Subject: RE: LIQUEFIED MANURE TRUCK LYRICS
From: Crowhugger
Date: 20 Feb 00 - 03:45 AM

Mouldy, any sh***y song is good enough for me. I can't wait for more posts.

Subject: RE: LIQUEFIED MANURE TRUCK LYRICS
From: GUEST
Date: 20 Feb 00 - 02:44 AM

The Yetties did one called "Fling it 'ere, fling it there" about a guy driving a load of liquid manure through a village, when it gets set off by a bump in the road. It's to a version of a well-known tune: " singing too ra lie, too ra lie, too ra lie ay", I think. I don't for a moment think it's the one you're after, as the culprit in this one is Walter Hodgkiss! It begins:

Now young Walter Hodgkiss he brought back a load / of liquid manure from the farm up the road. / And he hummed to himself as he drove up the street, / while his load also hummed in the afternoon heat.

Chorus: Fling it here, fling it there, / if you're standing by then you'll all get your share.

I daresay someone will come up with the one you're after.

mouldy

Subject: RE: LIQUEFIED MANURE TRUCK LYRICS
From: wysiwyg
Date: 20 Feb 00 - 01:26 AM

Dear GUEST,MEADOW MUSKRAT,

I am sure Mudcat folks will help you look for this.

By the way, we try to reserve ALL CAPS for just song titles, as otherwise it looks like shouting. Most of us read so many messages in a day, we really need to save our eyes.

Below, you'll see I put your message in sentence case so it will be easier for people to read, and help search.

---------------------------------------------------------

"Does anyone know of lyrics or recording of a british song about a runaway liquid manure truck? I heard it by a member of a Morris dance group at the Fox Hollow festival in the late 70's. Chorus was something like:

There goes old John Baker,

In his rattling old bone shaker,

And he never realized the trail he left behind him.

Subject: LIQUEFIED MANURE TRUCK LYRICS
From: GUEST,MEADOW MUSKRAT
Date: 20 Feb 00 - 01:18 AM

Does anyone know of lyrics or recording of a British song about a runaway liquid manure truck? I heard it by a member of a Morris dance group at the Fox Hollow Festival in the late 70's. Chorus was something like “There goes old John Baker, in his rattling old bone shaker, and he never realized the trail he left behind him.”

Message changed from all caps. --JoeClone, 8-Apr-02.