Lyr/Chords Req: I've burnt the toast on both sides

Subject: I've burnt the toast on both sides now
From: Kernow John
Date: 04 Jun 00 - 03:55 PM

An Australian lady came to the folk club last night and sang two songs one of which was a parody of Both Sides Now and was about the singers failure in making toast. It had the audience roaring with laughter.
I think the author was a guy who's last name is Clarke and he sings with ?? The Shiny Bottom Band.
I'd love the words if anyone has them.
Regards Baz

Subject: RE: Lyr/Chords Req: I've burnt the toast on both
From: Bob Bolton
Date: 04 Jun 00 - 11:43 PM

G'day Baz,

I have managed not to get into any of the presentations by The Shiny Bum Singers at 2 successive (Australian) National Folk Festivals ... they are that popular! They are all Canberra minor bureaucrats who sing "the folk songs of Bureaucracy" - usually parodies of popular and folk songs.

I do know someone who got there early enough to get a seat and she also bought the songbook, so I will ask if I can borrow it and scan in the words. It may well have a URL on it and I will pass that on if possible.

Regards,

Bob Bolton

Subject: RE: Lyr/Chords Req: I've burnt the toast on both
From: Bob Bolton
Date: 05 Jun 00 - 09:27 AM

G'day again Baz,

I have checked with my friend and she confirmed that this song is much older than Chris Clarke's Shiny Bum Singers stuff. She may have the words, but I will have to wait a day or two.

I remember the song being sung a few years back at The Loaded Dog Folk Club, Annandale (Sydney suburb) but I did not memorise the words.

Regards,

Bob Bolton

Subject: RE: Lyr/Chords Req: I've burnt the toast on both
From: Kernow John
Date: 05 Jun 00 - 01:25 PM

Bob
Thanks for coming back so quickly. It will be great if you can get the words.
Regards, Baz

Subject: RE: Lyr/Chords Req: I've burnt the toast on both
From: Bugsy
Date: 20 Jun 00 - 03:38 AM

Subject: RE: Lyr/Chords Req: I've burnt the toast on both
From: Bugsy
Date: 20 Jun 00 - 03:39 AM

Any luck yet Bob?

Cheers

Bugsy

Subject: RE: Lyr/Chords Req: I've burnt the toast on both
From: Bob Bolton
Date: 21 Jun 00 - 12:17 AM

Er, ... G'day Bugsy,

I have to admit that I crossed paths with Evan Matheson (the bloke who sang this at The Loaded Dog Folk Club) over the Queen's Birthday weekend of 10-12 June ...but was too busy enjoying the Australian Folk Festival at Kiama to ask him about the words.

Another friend has raised the matter with him separately and I expect something will turn up. Perhaps I need to get Evan's email address from her and pursue this directly.

Regards,

Bob Bolton

Subject: RE: Lyr/Chords Req: I've burnt the toast on both
From: Kernow John
Date: 21 Jun 00 - 06:03 PM

Bob
Thanks for trying
regards
Baz

Subject: RE: Lyr/Chords Req: I've burnt the toast on both
From: Bugsy
Date: 22 Jun 00 - 04:09 AM

No worries Bob, when you get around to it, will do just fine.

Cheers

Bugsy

Subject: RE: Lyr/Chords Req: I've burnt the toast on both
From: Bob Bolton
Date: 11 Jul 00 - 10:12 PM

G'day BAZ, Bugsy et al,

Sorry I'm not coming back with the lyrics, but things are slowly progressing. the problem is that Chris Clarke has had such a hit with all his Shiny Bum Singers material that he is busy trying to get it all documented and registered with APRA. (And, lets not forget that he is producung the folklore of the Canberra bureacrats ... You can't expect speed with that!)

I gather he wrote the words back in the seventies when the song Both Sides Now hit the charts - and didn't do much after singing it a few times. Evan Matheson (Autoharp maker and player of Brisbane, Queensland) came across them and added it to his repertoire and it was from him, during a visit to Sydney, that I first heard the song. Evan feels it is up to Chris to decide whether or not to post and I have to agree.

Chris is aware of MudCat (and, I suspect, may have been around here a year or two back as Canberra Chris). We can only hope to see him post the words some time soon.

Regards,

Bob Bolton

Subject: RE: Lyr/Chords Req: I've burnt the toast on both
From: Bugsy
Date: 10 Jun 07 - 07:50 PM

Any luck yet Bob?

Cheers

Bugsy ;>}

Subject: RE: Lyr/Chords Req: I've burnt the toast on both
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 10 Jun 07 - 08:43 PM

Bugsy, Canberra Chris has just been a significant part of The Shiny Bum Tour to SE England & is currently visiting family & is very irregularly accessing the Internet.

Chris posted the words on
this thread, 19th June 2003 Chris usually sings unaccompanied, so might not have the chords however, the song is an exact parody of "Both Sides Now" so why not have a look for those chords.

sandra

Subject: Lyr Add: BOTH SIDES NOW (THE TOAST SONG) (parody)
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 10 Jun 07 - 09:04 PM

Both Sides Now (known as The Toast Song)
(Chris Clarke)

In morning time when I arise
My breakfast fare is no surprise,
I pour the cornflakes, make the tea
And then reach for the bread.
I turn the gas on, light the grill,
And think this time I really will
Stay wide awake, make perfect toast
and start the day well-fed -

I'll lightly toast it both sides now,
Both up and down
To golden brown,
The toasting time I will recall,
I really can make toast
After all.

But then I read, to pass the time,
The cornflakes advertising rhyme,
I hear the news, but don't take in
A single item read.
And then an old, familiar smell
Invades the dreamworld where I dwell,
and fills the room with flames and smoke
and fumes of burning bread -

I've burnt the toast on both sides now,
Both front and back
To charcoal black,
The toasting time I don't recall,
I really can't make toast
After all.

And so I scrape it in the bin
Which makes the slices rather thin,
Then wipe the knife upon the cloth
Back in my dream-like state.
I butter it with marmalade,
Then to correct the mess I've made
Spread butter on the other side
And stick it to the plate -

My toast is buttered both sides now,
Both left and right,
I'm none too bright,
The buttering I don't recall,
I really can't make toast
At all.

Written in Perth, Western Australia, early 80s.
Chris Clarke

Subject: RE: Lyr/Chords Req: I've burnt the toast on both
From: Bugsy
Date: 11 Jun 07 - 04:37 AM

Thanks for that.

Bugsy

Subject: RE: Lyr/Chords Req: I've burnt the toast on both
From: JennyO
Date: 11 Jun 07 - 04:47 AM

Bugsy, pity you missed hearing it sung in one of the stairwell sessions at the National this year. I can't remember which night it was.