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How many Mudcats have cats!?

Phot 03 Oct 09 - 04:38 AM
katlaughing 03 Oct 09 - 12:33 AM
GUEST,seth in Olympia 03 Oct 09 - 12:22 AM
ranger1 02 Oct 09 - 06:14 PM
Rapparee 02 Oct 09 - 05:04 PM
sing4peace 02 Oct 09 - 04:59 PM
wysiwyg 02 Oct 09 - 04:28 PM
ranger1 09 Apr 05 - 10:39 PM
freda underhill 09 Apr 05 - 07:45 AM
Kaleea 09 Apr 05 - 03:15 AM
GUEST,punkfolkrocker 09 Apr 05 - 12:33 AM
LadyJean 09 Apr 05 - 12:24 AM
Charmion 08 Apr 05 - 05:41 PM
JennyO 08 Apr 05 - 06:09 AM
mack/misophist 07 Apr 05 - 10:10 AM
el_punkoid_nouveau 07 Apr 05 - 03:14 AM
open mike 07 Apr 05 - 01:19 AM
Stephen L. Rich 06 Apr 05 - 11:44 PM
GUEST,petr 06 Apr 05 - 07:54 PM
John Hardly 05 Apr 05 - 08:14 PM
Cats 05 Apr 05 - 03:47 PM
SINSULL 05 Apr 05 - 12:16 PM
Bat Goddess 05 Apr 05 - 08:00 AM
PoppaGator 04 Apr 05 - 07:49 PM
Bat Goddess 04 Apr 05 - 06:57 PM
Burke 04 Apr 05 - 05:50 PM
PoppaGator 04 Apr 05 - 05:38 PM
Peace 04 Apr 05 - 02:49 PM
GUEST,Frug 04 Apr 05 - 02:46 PM
GUEST,indignant feline 04 Apr 05 - 12:40 PM
Scooby Doo 04 Apr 05 - 12:34 PM
GUEST,Bill the Collie 04 Apr 05 - 09:49 AM
mandoleer 04 Apr 05 - 09:31 AM
Ebbie 04 Apr 05 - 12:18 AM
Bobert 03 Apr 05 - 10:08 PM
Stephen L. Rich 03 Apr 05 - 10:04 PM
Ebbie 03 Apr 05 - 09:52 PM
Peace 03 Apr 05 - 09:47 PM
Big Al Whittle 03 Apr 05 - 08:42 PM
jacqui.c 03 Apr 05 - 07:38 PM
LilyFestre 03 Apr 05 - 04:56 PM
Brían 03 Apr 05 - 04:12 PM
Ebbie 03 Apr 05 - 03:56 PM
vectis 09 Jul 01 - 07:38 PM
Tattie Bogle 09 Jul 01 - 06:55 PM
Jingle 09 Jul 01 - 02:04 PM
SharonA 09 Jul 01 - 08:54 AM
Ella who is Sooze 09 Jul 01 - 08:00 AM
The Cat's Whiskers 09 Jul 01 - 07:53 AM
GeorgeH 09 Jul 01 - 07:47 AM
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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Phot
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 04:38 AM

We have four, Loki, Apollo (Brother of LtS cat Raven), Pixel and Persephone (daughter of Pixel), all of whome are currently curled up on the bed around Fiona, hence I'm on the computer!

Wassail!! Chris


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: katlaughing
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 12:33 AM

For the first time in my adult life I am down to two, Trystan & Kipling.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: GUEST,seth in Olympia
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 12:22 AM

I have a fine cat who sleeps on my bed, hangs out if I'm sick or depressed, never yowls, but talks in one and two syllable squeaks. She likes to sit on my chest when I'm in bed, but never sticks her butt in my face. She hates the whole idea of reading, though, and often will slap a book out my hands if I'm reading in bed and she wants attention.
I always have one cat at a time, she is #5.
seth


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: ranger1
Date: 02 Oct 09 - 06:14 PM

Do they taste just like chicken, Rap?


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Oct 09 - 05:04 PM

Couple in the freezer....


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: sing4peace
Date: 02 Oct 09 - 04:59 PM

I have always lived with cats. Currently, I am servant to two Siamese cats: Luna and Milo. Luna is a "pica" kitty. She eats lots of things that aren't food - anything wool, fringe, shoelaces, rubber bands, ribbons, etc.) She's also allergic to the world so requires constant vigilance and a daily dose of Prednisol. Milo is a very happy uncomplicated kitty.

---
Joyce


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: wysiwyg
Date: 02 Oct 09 - 04:28 PM

I don't HAVE. I am HAD BY.

~S~


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: ranger1
Date: 09 Apr 05 - 10:39 PM

For someone who isn't a cat person, I somehow ended up with two, neither one of them planned. I acquired cat #1 almost six years ago when someone abandoned her in the park where I was working at that time. She's white with grey spots and the SO named her Caitlin (after telling me vehemently that we were NOT keeping her). She was a skinny, starving creature in a campground full of dumb, slow-moving rodents. I should have known then that she was mentally defective. She's now almost twice the weight she was when I brought her home. Her nicknames include Dumb Bunny, Piglet, Sausage, Retard Kitty, The Evil One, Katie Cat and Glutton.

Go-Go, our other cat, was acquired almost exactly one year after Caitlin became a member of our household. I inherited her after my adopted grandmother died. The local shelter wouldn't take her because of her age (she was 15 at the time), but she was still healthy and pretty spry for an old fart. She, too, was white with grey spots. She managed to survive another four and a half years, despite Caitlin's best assassination attempts, but we had to have her euthanised just before Christmas, due to a giant tumor in her abdomen. I'm rather guiltily enjoying being a single cat household, but the SO misses her terribly. The dog is wishing we were a no-cat household...


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: freda underhill
Date: 09 Apr 05 - 07:45 AM

naah, cats are too aloof to bother having an opinion about anything human. i have three -

my old cat Baxter (17), scrawny, cranky, and three legged, has been known to hiss when feeling grumpy, but very loveable. my ex and i have joint custody.

deli – my son brought her home about a year ago, she is sweet, affectionate, and gentle.

and socksy - feral, lives in our back yard, has attached himself to us.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Kaleea
Date: 09 Apr 05 - 03:15 AM

Ebbie, My kitty was 20 & a half when she went to kitty heaven a year back. Her longhair coat was quite matted, but she hated grooming so much that I didn't force it on her too much as it made her so mad. I gave her kitty vitamins she licked out of the tube every day all her life. I think that's one reason she lived so long. Her name, believe it or don't was "Sis" which was short for "Persistence." Yes, really.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: GUEST,punkfolkrocker
Date: 09 Apr 05 - 12:33 AM

all cats are bastards..


and would probably vote tory..



selfish furry f***ers !!!


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: LadyJean
Date: 09 Apr 05 - 12:24 AM

Mr. Fitz, the senior member of the feline firm, is an orange and white tabby gentleman, acquired after a friend's cat had kittens, and I said I'd only take one if they had an orange tom with white feet.
Fitz has definate ideas about his rights and priveledges as senior cat, and insists on his right to be snuggled at specified times, fed canned food at certain intervals, and have primary use of the chair in the good bird watching window.
Musetta is a tiny tortie with a large bad attitude. Hollowfox's kids dubbed her the hiss machine.
Grace O'Malley is a grey tabby with tufty ears, who shows every sign of becoming a huge cat. I acquired her two weeks before I moved. She is rather impressively playful. She likes to wake me up in the small hours, trilling her "wanna play?" chirp. The older cats do NOT wish to play.
Gracie was abandoned when she was perhaps a day old and bottle fed. She actually likes to be picked up and turned upside down. Of course she likes to shred your hands when you do it. But it's all good clean fun.
I've been sleeping with a cat in my bed since I was 7, and I am not really comfortable sleeping without one.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Charmion
Date: 08 Apr 05 - 05:41 PM

The ideal number of cats in the household is one per lap. When the number of cats exceeds the number of laps, politics happens.

For the last 15 years, whenever a vacancy has occurred in our feline establishment, a suitable cat has arrived at the door and moved in. I'm told some people actually *purchase* cats; I can't imagine why.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: JennyO
Date: 08 Apr 05 - 06:09 AM

For the last 6 years, I have been owned by Onyx, a lovely black female with brown highlights which show up in the sun. She is mainly an outside cat. She is rather timid around other cats - I have even seen her being bossed around by a visiting moggy. I think it is mainly because she is very laid back and not aggressive.

However, today I have taken delivery of another kitty, my son's black cat, Bella, who is apparently somewhat more assertive. They have moved to a flat where they aren't allowed any pets, so I've inherited her for now. We've only been back here an hour or so, and Bella has already made herself at home by rubbing up against the various pieces of furniture, and is now curled up on the cushion I rest my feet on when I am at my computer.

The two cats haven't met yet, because Onyx is away paying her respects to the neighbourhood, but it will be interesting to see what happens when they do. I think I'll let them meet with a screen door between them for a start, but I'll have to be careful to make sure that Onyx doesn't feel left out. Bella is also mainly an outside cat, so once she is used to being in a new place and I let her outside, they will have to get used to being around each other a lot. Bella is more of a pure black, and slimmer, so there will be no mixing them up - not really a matched set of bookends at all.

So now I am owned by two cats!


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: mack/misophist
Date: 07 Apr 05 - 10:10 AM

Four cats allow me to share their house. The same number that Mark Twain lived with. Ours have shorter names, though.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: el_punkoid_nouveau
Date: 07 Apr 05 - 03:14 AM

ShadyLady is officially owned by the World's greatest hedonist - Catkin. The world is there purely for his pleasure, so he has extended his ownership to the rest of us!

And to see his victory roll when he manages to escape upstairs...

He has to share us with Juanita (the name is my fault - she only has one eye!).


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: open mike
Date: 07 Apr 05 - 01:19 AM

shortly before my old kittie, Lucy, was ready to leave this world,
a grey kittie which looked like a younger version of her showed up
(to take her place?) Moki (short for Smokey) received her training in the ways of the (cat) world and soon was ready to take over the house
when Lucy could no longer manage the task. A year ago Moki had three
kitties...Cinder (or Lucinda) who has stayed, and her little lion-like
siblings, Leo and Elsa who found new homes. they now rarely venture onto the ground floor, as the newest member of the family, Abbie the dog pesters them if they come within reach. If they would jsut stand their ground the dog would soon leave them alone, as she co-exists with other cats, but since these cats run, the dog goes into chase mode and never
the twain shall meet. i devised a doorway upstairs so the kitties can came and go thru the window and they are roof cats now. the cat door
on the ground floor gets harrassed too much by the dog to be used by them now.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Stephen L. Rich
Date: 06 Apr 05 - 11:44 PM

Actually, i have three cats; Nosey, Stranger, and Emily. They are all mixed breed. Hence my previous question.

Stephen Lee


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: GUEST,petr
Date: 06 Apr 05 - 07:54 PM

we have a bengal.
his name is Reavy.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: John Hardly
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 08:14 PM

funny story Sinsull!

Susie very well might have reincarnated into my Maggie -- sweet to us, hell on vets.

we've got:

Moose -- Russian blue (as we assign breeding to our mongrel cats) gentleman. Loves everyone and everyone loves him. Digs flying feathers at the end of a fishing line. Moose came to us in a -2 degree blizzardy night when our Mal, Blitz, found him under our porch with his brother..

Crush -- dark orange tabby (as we assign breeding to our mongrel cats). If you were to take a measuring tape to Crush you would find that he is exactly as long as he is tall as he is wide. Loves everyone except the truck that comes to unload the dumpster at the business next door. Digs flying feathers at the end of a fishing line.

Maggie -- tortoise shell -- originally to be named "Fender", but as I play with a Fender extra heavy, and it was clear that she was never going to achieve even half the weight of the men (at 15 and 16 lbs), neither would she ever be an "extra heavy". "Maggie" she is.

Ditto -- the other tortoise shell cat (hence "ditto"). Ditto quickly became "Ditty", then, after she started using places other than the litter box to relieve herself, she quickly became "the Diddiot". She is now the shop cat and getting along fine in isolation. Seems that in these cat's game of survivor, one gets booted onto the island.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Cats
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 03:47 PM

Four - two at school, Mumsie, who was National Cat of the Year in 1999 for services to Autistic children, daughter Joshua who lives under the RE rooms and who we had to take part of a wall down for, hence the name. Two at home, Bathsheba Everdeen and Isolde of the White Paws.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: SINSULL
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 12:16 PM

4
Lizzie
Alice
Ed
Fred

My adventures with the kitties are in the annals of Mudcat.

My favorite pilling story involved Susie, now gone. She was a bitch to pill and I asked the vet for liquid medicine. He decided I needed a lesson in pilling. Before it was over he held Susie wrapped in a towel while his terrified assistant tried to get a pill in her mouth without getting bitten and a third helper sprayed a plant mister in her face to startle her into swallowing. Susie stood up very indignantly and spit the soggy pill on the table. I got liquid medicine.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 08:00 AM

They were born under a house a few towns away -- from a loooooooooong line of ferals. Resident of house snagged the kittens an brought them inside and snagged mama and got her some veterinary care including, I think, spaying. Heather kept a male and female kitten and I ended up with two females. What we've discovered is that they have each other and have no need (so they think) for the other cats (although both, especially Banjo, are fond of Mortimer) or for "The Giants". After all, all we do is feed them, entice them with treats, give them shelter and a warm place to sleep, a reasonably clean litter box, etcet etcet. Banjo can sometimes be "caught" if she's sleeping on the bed. She hates being petted and glares at me. Once she caught herself purring, but immediately forgot about it. A couple years ago I snuck up on Creamsicle and actually got to rub her behind the ears and under the chin for a few minutes -- before she realized what was happening and bolted. She's got the biggest purr of them all. And she's the one who sits at the foot of the bed, staring wide-eyed while I pet Mort or Sabine, looking as if she's thinking, "I'd really like you to do that to me provded you can do it without touching me."

Sometimes they act as if they have fur fer brains.

Sigh.

My vet suggested a Hav-a-Heart trap, but all that would catch is Mortimer. Food is not a lour for them. And they won't eat at all if anybody else is in the room (even ignoring them).

Linn


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: PoppaGator
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 07:49 PM

"Feral" and "inside" at the same time? Yikes!


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 06:57 PM

Current cat population is sort of four. Mortimer, my big orange and white lug (not fat, but big) is our oldest. He'll be 11 in a couple days and spent his early days in a household full of people allergic to cats. He's also diabetic and requires special food and feeding and needs to be "insulated" twice a day. Sabine was 3 when she joined us shortly after 9-11. She's the product of a broken home, but I was thrilled to have a black cat again. She's almost all black with just a wee white star on her chest. She's also the best huntress of the bunch -- we call her Sheena Queen of the Jungle. We were rudely awakened the other morning about a half hour before the alarm was due to go off by her crunching on a (by now quite dead) flying squirrel smack in the middle of the bed. I didn't really think that was an improvement on stepping on the really nasty bits when I get out of bed.

Then there's Creamsicle and Banjo, the two ferals. I'm not sure if I count them. They're almost 5 years old and still won't let "The Giants" (Curmudgeon and I) pet them or catch them. They'll be inside cats until I can catch them and get them to the vet to be spayed, but our house is one big cat cave and the catching hasn't been good. I did actually have Creamsicle eat a treat from my fingers the other day, but she still runs whenever we walk into the room. No brains. I think they're descended from a long line of cousins. I KNOW they're many many generations feral.

Linn


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Burke
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 05:50 PM

I wrote about Barnabas in this thread. He has since departed to the mouse filled meadows in the sky.

I am now owned by brothers Felix & Oscar. They are completely black. The only way to tell them apart is that Felix's tail is long & skinny (kind of normal) while Oscar's is shorter & a bit fat.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: PoppaGator
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 05:38 PM

We're not big-time cat lovers at my house, but we got hornswoggled into becoming cat owners a few eyars back.

Our daughter brought a female kitten home from college and left her with us when she moved out of our house and into a no-pets apartment.

As often happens in nature, Minnie (short for "Minou," a French word for kittycat and a common cat name here in south Louisiana) became pregnant in the midst of a whole lot of wailing and screaming outside our window. She bore a very small litter of two kittens, both of which easily found homes.

The second time that happened, she once again produced a mere two offspring ~ but this time, we only managed to give one of them away. So now we have Minnie the Mom and Leroy the Boy.

Because we're not terminally stupid, and capable of learning an obvious lesson sooner or later, we managed to get both cats neutered before any further reproduction could occur. An unfortunate side effect: Minnie the momma cat, once a paragon of sweetness and mellow behavior, suddenly became really ornery, hissing and attacking at the slightest provacation (or at no apparent provication at all). Her son, fortunately, remains extremely friendly and, for a cat, cooperative. So, we have one pet feline that we like, plus one other cat that we seem to be obligated to feed.

Young Leroy, by the way, exhibits a particular personal attachment to me. I believe it's because he was born in my dirty laundry.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Peace
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 02:49 PM

Tell me about it.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: GUEST,Frug
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 02:46 PM

Brucie................now thats what I call a pussy !!!


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: GUEST,indignant feline
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 12:40 PM

The very idea!

The correct question is how many Cats have pet Mudcats?


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Scooby Doo
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 12:34 PM

I have two cats,i inherited one from my son who is at University and the other was a stray several years ago.
I also feed a ferral cat called tomcat,but i try not to let him take over my life.
Scooby


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: GUEST,Bill the Collie
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 09:49 AM

I had a cast

- when I broke my bastarding ankle last year.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: mandoleer
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 09:31 AM

Used to have cats - up to 21 at times, but the 21st was always a temporary guest awaiting placement. Quite a few were Scottish Folds, which are absolutely delightful but hard to breed as you mustn't breed Fold to Fold for genetic reasons. Have managed to get freedom now and more birds and a red squirrel in the garden. Oh, yes, and have a look at this page (in these days of weapons of mass destruction.....) http://members.aol.com/moggycat/Mark-I-CAT.html


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Ebbie
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 12:18 AM

Yoo hoo, Bobert! When are you moving? Do let us in on the process, OK?


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Bobert
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 10:08 PM

Two indoor, two ferral....

Getting ready to move and gonna inherit 4 ferral to go along with the two indoor and the two ferral that we're gonna try to trap to take with us...

What's that make? I think about 8....

Bobert


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Stephen L. Rich
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 10:04 PM

What's a cat?


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Ebbie
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 09:52 PM

I've had to do it too, Jacqui. It is my contention that if a vet prescribes pills to a cat, s/he should make daily house calls.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Peace
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 09:47 PM

Jaysus . . . .


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 08:42 PM

have cats in the carnal sense.....?

I'm sure its an empty and meaningless experience.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: jacqui.c
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 07:38 PM

Ebbie - I've just sat here laughing uncontrollably reading 'On the Pill'. Having, in the past, a cat who needed regular medicating this was just so true!

We don't have any cats although SINSULL is always offering to part with Alice the Slut who she says would be great company for our crazy yellow lab, Seamus. Knowing Alice's prediliction for peeing in unwanted places we have politely (and not so politely) refused the offer.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: LilyFestre
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 04:56 PM

There are 6 cats who live together in a house that they are nice enough to share with us, the 9 dogs and 25 chickens!

Festre is the oldest...gray tiger kitty who really is KING OF THE HOUSE! He is moody, bitchy, vocal and does NOT like Goose the cat.

Daphne is Festre's wife. She is also a gray tiger kitty with white eyeliner surrounding her eyes. She is THE softest cat and has the most wonderful purr. She also has an Elvis sneer lip.

Normie is the youngest male cat. He is a yellow tiger kitty, son of Daphne and a white stray cat (Festre was NOT impressed with this...he snubbed Daphne for nearly a year!). Normie loves to snuggle with me, and ALWAYS has to be the nearest critter to my chin. If one of the other cats is sitting with me, Normie will walk over them (if not pushing them out of the way) to snuggle the closest to Mama's face. Normie also has the uncanny ability to wait until I am out of the shower and brushing my teeth before knocking on the bathroom door and demanding LOUDLY that the door be OPENED IMMEDIATELY if he has to wait for more than 10 seconds.

Goose is also a gray tiger kitty, son of Daphne and brother to Normie. Goose is GORGEOUS but none of the other cats like him. He is a bully....especially to our youngest and newest kitten. Festre enjoys sneaking up on Goose and screaming loudly at him while they chase each other up the stairs. Goose is a Mama's boy and will sit with me for hours and purr and purr and purr....it is his only saving grace.

Ellie is Mama's girl all over the place. She is a black cat who dislikes all manner of men. There was a time when I used to commute to college, stay at an apartment during the week and then come home on the weekends to my husband. Ellie travelled with me every week, sitting on my left shoulder as I drove. Given the chance to sneak into our bedroom, she will wake me up with lick of the eyeballs or a nibble on my nose. She once bit the part of my nose nearest my eyes....I do not know how I did not kill her...YOUCH!

Then, finally, there is Millie. Veronica found her on the back deck last summer. She was SO tiny and smelled to high heavens of skunk. There was NO way we could turn her away. She is a tiny gray tiger kitten with HUGE eyes and she frequently looks stoned. She is her Papa's girl....big old Grizzly Adams type falls asleep in his chair each night with his arm wrapped around Little Miss Millie...priceless!

I love my kitties and every single one of their little purrrrrsonalities!!!!!!

Michelle


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Brían
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 04:12 PM

Hmmm. I think we need a field guide to properly distinguish ours.

Brían


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Ebbie
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 03:56 PM

Received via email:
                         On the Pill

1. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

3. Retrieve cat from bedroom and throw soggy pill away.

4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for count of ten.

5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.

6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from the hearth and set to one side to repair later.

8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

10. Retrieve cat from neighbour's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Apply whisky compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw T-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12. Ring fire brigade to retrieve the cat from tree across the road. Apologise to neighbour who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.

13. Tie the cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.

14. Consume remainder of scotch. Get spouse to drive you to casualty, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnant from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.

15. Arrange for RSPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and ring local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: vectis
Date: 09 Jul 01 - 07:38 PM

I have a 20 year old called Penta (she's our fifth cat that's why) who is fat, snores, does nothing but eat, sleep and...
She enjoys lacerating us when we try to groom her but Hey! You've got to enjoy life where you can when you're a geriatric moggy.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 09 Jul 01 - 06:55 PM

Friends across the road got a black-and white one they called Oscar: we got a tabby (more like Scottish wildcat behaviour-wise): we called her Emmie (work it out - Oscar/Emmie??????) They're both totally daft. Tattie B


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Jingle
Date: 09 Jul 01 - 02:04 PM

Let me introduce Buddy and Kipper who let me live in their house and feed them in return for purring, dribbling and nudging my feet with their heads when I am trying to walk. Buddy is big and strong like a black panther and Kipper is very small with a tale like a squirrel. He also has comical back legs.


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: SharonA
Date: 09 Jul 01 - 08:54 AM

Up until almost exactly two years ago, I had two cats: Chester and Arthur (collectively named after the President!)

Chester came to me third-hand. He originally belonged to a songwriter acquaintance of mine. When he was about 5 years old, she said she'd developed an allergy to him and had to get rid of him, and the boyfriend I had at the time took him. Two years later, after Chester had nearly destroyed the man's trailer and was working on the rest of the trailer park (gardens, boat covers and seats, etc.), the man said he was taking Chester to the SPCA, and I said I'd take him instead... via the vet's office, for declawing.

So Chester became an indoors-only cat. After a year of this, he became quite mopey, so I went to a pet shop and got him his own kitten, and chose a name to go along with Chester's. Chester became a mom-cat but never let Artie forget who was the alpha-male, and Artie mimicked Chester's every move as he grew up.

Chester was an orange tabby semi-longhair (no white patches), about 13 pounds at his heaviest. I think he might have had some Maine Coon in him. He never hesitated to make his wishes known — LOUDLY — and would yell at me if I didn't make a lap for him quickly enough! He had the loudest purr I've ever heard in a cat. He lived to be 19, though in his waning years he suffered from gradual kidney failure and, in its last stages, I finally had to have him put to sleep. I still cry over that, and miss him horribly.

Arthur ("Artie"), happily, is still with me at 13. He's another semi-longhair and I call his color "black" though there are brown, grey, red and purple highlights and, as he ages, some growing white spots. He's the runt of somebody's litter, and I'm hard-pressed to keep his weight above 7 pounds; he'd rather be petted, hugged and carried than eat. Artie's quite the athlete, still as playful as a teenage cat, and excels at the high jump. (Yes, English Jon's Cat, this IS "Artie in the windowsill"!)

SharonA


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 09 Jul 01 - 08:00 AM

I think Monty Moo has taken to giving next door gifts of mice, frogs, and shrews... They told me about a sudden influx of small creatures, mostly dead, though some alive deposited around their house... OOOPS

Fitted Monty with a bell.... but he's still catching things... I think he must have developed a technique to stop the bell tingling.

George... 3am is a regular time in our house... though I have developed the ability to sleep through all prevailing, yeowls, scratchings, running across your stomach whilst you are asleep, (the larger cats fave) jumping onto your stomach from higher level. Scratching your head, hitting your face with their paws. Being part of the mad half hour circuit, and many more plans the pair of them do to try and wake us up...

banshee wailing though is the funniest.

E


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: The Cat's Whiskers
Date: 09 Jul 01 - 07:53 AM

I wish...

TCW


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Subject: RE: How many Mudcats have cats!?
From: GeorgeH
Date: 09 Jul 01 - 07:47 AM

I thought the question should be "how many cats own mudcatters" . . .

G. (whose delightful moggie woke him up at 4.50am today . .)


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Mudcat time: 26 April 7:17 AM EDT

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