Help: 'Tied up in the back of my van'

Subject: 'Tied up in the back of my van'
From: Robby
Date: 03 May 01 - 09:41 AM

I believe it was a few months ago I came a cross a thread where someone had posted a parody to the chorus, at least, of Black Velvet Band. The parody ended with the line that is the title of this thread.
Unfortunately, I did not bookmark it, write it down, or print it out. Now, I can't find the thread. Does anyone remember that thread and can you provide me a link to it.
Even better, would be if somebody knows the verses and chorus to that parody and would be kind enough to post them.
Thanks,
Robby

Subject: RE: Help: 'Tied up in the back of my van'
From: IanC
Date: 03 May 01 - 09:52 AM

Here's the thread

Lyr Req: black velvet band

Cheers!
Ian

Subject: RE: Help: 'Tied up in the back of my van'
From: MMario
Date: 03 May 01 - 09:56 AM

well - I don't think this is what you remember - but it may be.

Subject: RE: Help: 'Tied up in the back of my van'
From: Robby
Date: 03 May 01 - 10:23 AM

Thanks, I knew I would get some help on this. But I never thought it would be that quick.

IanC, thanks for that link. It was the thread I was seeking. Although, I had thought there was more to it than the chorus.
br> MMario, I enjoyed your link, even though it was not what I was seeking. I had found that one when it was going around originally. Unlike the link given by IanC, I did remember to print that one out. *VBG*

Robby

Subject: RE: Help: 'Tied up in the back of my van'
From: Clinton Hammond
Date: 03 May 01 - 10:25 AM

That was me I think... It was just a line that hit me.. i haven't written the whole parody yet, and with my OTHER version of BVB, I probably won't...

;-)

Subject: RE: Help: 'Tied up in the back of my van'
From: Clinton Hammond
Date: 03 May 01 - 10:30 AM

Another reason I'll probably NOT write it is that Itend to take things WAAAY further than most people... for instance, right now in my mind all the verse snippits that I'm thinking of are turning into a child abduction song... so why bother right... I'd never sing it...

Subject: RE: Help: 'Tied up in the back of my van'
From: Robby
Date: 03 May 01 - 11:59 AM

ClintonHammond,
If you ever do get around to writing your BVB parody (not the child abduction one you mention), I sure would like to see it.
BTW, and just out of curiosity, you wouldn't be any relation to David Hammond, would you? I have a multi-LP collection of Irish Ballads, Jigs and Reels, one of which contains a number of songs sung by David Hammond, which, from what I have been able to learn, he included in a collection called Songs From Ulster, I believe. I'm sure some one will correct me if I got the title to his collection wrong.
Robby

Subject: RE: Help: 'Tied up in the back of my van'
From: Clinton Hammond
Date: 03 May 01 - 12:15 PM

I donno... Hammond was the name of the guy who knocked my mom up, and then knocked her around... when she left him and took me, she left me with his name so I'd have access to things like his medical history, in case I needed it... So the Hammonds, I know them not at all...

My other parody version of BVB (A New Twist) has been posted a time or 2 I'm pretty sure... but just in case, lemme dig it up and I'll post it again...

back in a few mo's!

;-)

Subject: Lyr Add: BLACK VELVET BAND (A NEW TWIST)
From: Clinton Hammond
Date: 03 May 01 - 12:22 PM

The Black Velvet Band
(A New Twist)

In a neat little town they call Belfast
Upon my love luck I was down
But hopeful was I that there I'd find
A wife for me in that fair town

Then one day as I was out walking
I spied her in shade 'neath a tree
So fair and sweet and innocent
Here at last was the true love for me

(Chorus)
Her eyes they shone like the diamonds
You'd think she was queen of the land (And she was!)
And around her dainty white silken throat
She fastened a black velvet band

She was the most beautiful maiden
On whom my eye would ever rest
And she said she would be my true lover
If I followed her only request

She said "I love you and I trust you
So I hope that you do understand
You may have all of me but don't ever touch
My decorative black velvet band"

(Chorus)

Her throat was as soft as a whisper
And as white as the pure driven snow
I simply had to chance kissing it
But first remove her velvet bow

I wandered and pondered for hours
Then to me the idea did creep
My best chance would come to slip it off
When this maiden was soundly asleep

(Chorus)

So, in the stillness and quiet of night-time
I moved with and unsteady hand
Across to my young lovers pillow
To steal away her velvet band

Her diamond eyes opened quiet startled
"You've not heeded what I have said"
Then her head twisted off of her lovely neck
And rolled away right off the bed

Her head, it bumped down the staircase
Out the doorway and into the street
Where it slid to a halt and I heard it call
"Come out here and get me, you creep"

(Chorus)

Well I hit the ground at a dead run
And I haven't stopped running for years
Now I 'm a rambler, A-roving alone
Another drunken balladeer

So come all of you jolly young fellows
I'll have you take warning by me
Don't be too blinded by beauty boys
There may be more that you don't see

(Chorus)

feckin HTML!!!!

Subject: RE: Help: 'Tied up in the back of my van'
From: wysiwyg
Date: 03 May 01 - 01:03 PM

Aw CH, yer a sweetie, you old bugger-me-dog!

~S~

Subject: RE: Help: 'Tied up in the back of my van'
From: Robby
Date: 03 May 01 - 01:18 PM

Oh, that was good. I'll have to save and learn that one.
Robby

Subject: RE: Help: 'Tied up in the back of my van'
From: wysiwyg
Date: 04 May 01 - 02:38 AM

Which?

Subject: RE: Help: 'Tied up in the back of my van'
From: Big Tim
Date: 04 May 01 - 05:37 AM

Try also Pecker Dunne's "Ould Morris Van".

Subject: RE: Help: 'Tied up in the back of my van'
From: GUEST,Robby (who is not at his day job)
Date: 04 May 01 - 08:23 AM

Why, the BVB with the new twist. That's too good to lose.