Lyr Add: St. Jude's Infirmary (Parody for Spaw)

Subject: St. Jude's Infirmary
From: mooman
Date: 02 Jul 01 - 09:26 AM

Since His Flatulence requested it personally on this thread who am I to refuse. I am sure others will be able to contribute much better efforts! To the usual tune.

St Jude's Infirmary

I went down to St. Jude's Infirmary
To see Doc Michler there
He laid me on a long white table
To check on his valve repair

Then up spoke the good doctor
"She's very low" he said
"My blood pressure?" I responded
"No, your tit" he replied instead

I went down to EJ's Tavern
On the corner by the square
They were serving drinks as usual
And the usual crowd did stare

On my left stood old Rick Fielding
There was laughter in his eyes
He turned to the crowd around him
And said "Something's drooping I surmise"

"Let her go, let her go, God bless her
Wherever she may roam
She may search your body over
To find a better home"

Oh when I die, please bury me
With my mitral valve intact
Hang a twenty-dollar gold piece on my left tit
So my friends'll know I died evenly Pat

Get six 'Catters to carry my coffin
Six flaming trolls to sing a song
With a melodeon on my tail gate
To raise Hell as we go along

Now that's the end of my story
Let's have another round of booze
And if anyone should ask you just tell them
I got the St. Jude's Infirmary low-tit blues

mooman

---

Search for "infirmary" threads

Subject: RE: BS: St. Jude's Infirmary
From: MMario
Date: 02 Jul 01 - 09:37 AM

*applause*

Subject: RE: BS: St. Jude's Infirmary
From: Bill D
Date: 02 Jul 01 - 10:41 AM

now, that could go on a CD, .....but we'd need several other cuts.

*ducking & running*

Subject: BS: Parody for 'Spaw
From: mooman
Date: 02 Jul 01 - 06:38 PM

Refreshed and changed the title of this thread as the original didn't reflect Spaw's suggestion in the "Beseech" thread!

mooman

Subject: RE: BS: St. Jude's Infirmary
From: mooman
Date: 02 Jul 01 - 06:39 PM

Whoops! That didn't work! Perhaps an elf or Joeclone can help!

mooman

---

Hi, Mooman. You can change the title of a message. If it's a thread you started and you'd like a name change, send a personal message to me or to Pene Azul. Max and Bert can change thread titles, too - but the usual people to contact are Pene and me. We don't change thread titles as a matter of course, but we will, if the request is legitimate and not a frequent occurence.
Did I change it right?
-Joe Offer-

Subject: RE: BS: St. Jude's Infirmary (Parody for Spaw)
From: mooman
Date: 02 Jul 01 - 07:41 PM

Thanks Joe,

Yes that's perfect!

Thanks for the info about Pene and yourself on such matters. Normally I wouldn't have bothered to ask but as an afterthought I felt that the new title reflected the spirit of the orginal thread much better!

Many thanks for your assistance and very quick response!

Best regards

mooman

Subject: RE: BS: St. Jude's Infirmary (Parody for Spaw)
From: JenEllen
Date: 02 Jul 01 - 07:50 PM

I'm with Bill on this one. It should go on the "Bits and Pieces" CD of all of our Post-Op 'Catters. Great job mooman.

~J

Subject: RE: BS: St. Jude's Infirmary (Parody for Spaw)
From: catspaw49
Date: 02 Jul 01 - 08:32 PM

What a great job !!!! Mooman, any threats I may have made toward you are hereby rescinded! That's hilarious and I'm with Bill and JE..........We need to include this for all future 'Catter "cut-ups."

So glad you changed the title too.......Thanks Joe for the help.

Get six 'Catters to carry my coffin
Six flaming trolls to sing a song
With a melodeon on my tail gate
To raise Hell as we go along

What a verse.....LMAO!!!

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: St. Jude's Infirmary (Parody for Spaw)
From: Patrish(inactive)
Date: 03 Jul 01 - 04:33 AM

LOL Richard,
This reminded me of a birthday card that I sent to my daughter, the verse goes like this

There's squeaky ones and rumbly ones that quiver in your belly
Noisy blasts never last, its the quiet ones that are smelly
Some can be musical, with a rhythm like a drum
Hot ones must be used with care for they can scorch your bum
While all of these are potent, their powers are quite small
Cos I've heard that one of yours can clear the Albert Hall

Patrish xx

Subject: RE: BS: St. Jude's Infirmary (Parody for Spaw)
From: Geoff the Duck
Date: 03 Jul 01 - 08:37 AM

What other tracks would we expect on the 'catters Bits and Pieces CD?
The first cut is the deepest?
The Gore from Spaw goes mainly on the Floor! (to the tune of Th Rain in Spain)
Hold the man Down (shanty)
Quack!

Subject: RE: BS: St. Jude's Infirmary (Parody for Spaw)
From: Amos
Date: 04 Jul 01 - 12:46 AM

Well, maybe he could get a coupla sidemen to stand well behind and sing this one...

Nobody Knows Ya When You're Half Of Spaw

(Bluesy and torchy, like Bessie)

Once I had  had a heart of a normal man,
Only farted when I was alone in the can
I was kind to my friends, who were normal and square
I pointed out, up here, and pointed down, down there!
Then I began to fall all wrong
Took up singing them damn folk songs
Started surfing the Net, and got hooked on the Cat,
Turned into Catspaw, and that was that,
 

Cuz noooobody knows you
When let one out!
When your innards are rotting, and you got seams in your side
An' you let out them clouds of that sulphur  oxide
Noooobody knows you
When your parts are all "spare"
Your original equipment is all in your mind
An' they post radiation stickers on your poor behind!,
Noooobody knows you,
When you let one out!
I'm startin' to think it's a natural law,
Nobody knows you when you're half of Spaw!
 

Well, soon I was famous all the web around,
For bein' the fartinest' Cat around
I got put in a ward, an' let out again
For telling them about all my imaginry friends
If I ever get my hand on my extra pound,
I'm gonna squeeze that fella til the trumpet sounds!
You can swim in Jell-O, wear a bubble-wrap  bra,
But nobody knows you when you're half o' Spaw!
 

Yeah, nobody knows you
When you let them farts out!
Trading in body parts don't win no friends,
Nor blowing on them possums in their little rear ends
Nooobody knows you
When yer boobs hang south
When you can't remember who you really are
An' everyone tells you that your name is Spaw,

Oh, nooobody knows you
When you let them out,
And I'm startin' to think
It's a natural law
Nobody knows you when you're half of Spaw!

 

Regards,

A

Subject: RE: BS: St. Jude's Infirmary (Parody for Spaw)
From: mooman
Date: 04 Jul 01 - 07:10 AM

Excellent Amos!

Does 'Spaw really fart sulphur dioxide rather than the normal methane and hydrogen sulphide? Hell, I hope they're not wet ones or the resulting sulphuric acid will be corroding and rotting everything in sight!

On the other hand...probably you're right there!

mooman

Subject: RE: BS: St. Jude's Infirmary (Parody for Spaw)
From: Amos
Date: 05 Jul 01 - 01:10 AM

Geez, mebbe it got interpreted as trying to vulcanize the old fart!!

A

Subject: RE: BS: St. Jude's Infirmary (Parody for Spaw)
From: catspaw49
Date: 05 Jul 01 - 01:22 AM

My gawd.....What a winner!!!!!! Mooman blasts out a beauty and then Amos shows just what it is that makes Amos famous!!!! Geez Amos, what a piece of work!!! I pass on my best salute in honor of your work!

BBBRRRAAAWWWMMMPPP

.....aahhhhhhhh...................

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: St. Jude's Infirmary (Parody for Spaw)
From: Amos
Date: 05 Jul 01 - 01:29 AM

That's all I was really waiting for, Pat. Now I KNOW you're back!

A