Lyr Req: songs of Paddy Roberts

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: songs of Paddy Roberts
From: Peter the Squeezer
Date: 27 Jun 18 - 02:46 PM

Our Little Village

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: songs of Paddy Roberts
From: Peter the Squeezer
Date: 27 Jun 18 - 02:40 PM

From: GUEST,Woody Wood

Has anyone got the lyrics to 'Our Little Village is a real showplace ?


OUR LITTLE VILLAGE - Paddy Roberts

Our little village is a real showplace, full of old world grace and charm,
The fact that nobody ever keeps the laws shouldn't really cause alarm.
Each yokel who wanders up and down the joint has a slightly pointed head.
The reason they wear that rather vacant grin is they're all so interbred.

There's a steeple bell that's as rickety as hell, and will fall down any minute.
There's a wishing well, but it's only fair to tell, there's a headless body in it.

But such little incidents we always meet in a way discreet and calm.
Yes, our little village is a real showplace, full of old world grace and charm.

Our little village has an open door, where the rich and poor can mix.
They meet up together on a Friday night, and they all get tight as ticks.
And folk come to visit us from far an near - in tradition we're so rich.
Yet, somehow the visitors get quite a turn every time we burn a witch.

Oh the squire's wife had a most unhappy life when they found her on the sofa.
It was misconstrued, but they caught her in the nude playing bingo with the chauffeur.

They tarred her and feathered her, and threw her out of the house, without a qualm.
Yes, our little village is a real showplace, full of old world grace and charm.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: songs of Paddy Roberts
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 27 Jun 18 - 05:32 AM

Guest Steve:
"I Love Mary" is transcribed in full Here

Cheers
Nigel

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: songs of Paddy Roberts
From: GUEST,Steve Thorp
Date: 27 Jun 18 - 04:13 AM

I love Mary, shy little blue eyed Mary, warm and glowing as the evening sky,
I love Mary, never a bit contrary, and I’ll love her till the day I die.
But I’m going out with a blousy old trout called Sadie, she’s right on the ball but she ain’t what you call a lady, as a beauty she’s a stumor but I’ll keep my sense of humour, I can stomach the lot as long as she’s got that old mazoumour?. So I put out the cat and I do this and that for Sadie, and if I keep my health I can end up a wealthy man
And though I lov e Mary, pretty little Mary, Mary doesn’t suit my plan, Mary’s just an also ran

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: songs of Paddy Roberts
From: GUEST,Steve Thorp
Date: 27 Jun 18 - 04:03 AM

Oh woe is me and alas alack, a tear rolls down my cheek,
As I tell the story of Nellie Clack, the belle of Barking Creek.
Her hair was yellow as the morning sun, except where the black shows threw,
And her age has been a steady twenty one, since 1922.

One lovely evening when the moon was new she stood by the garden gate,
While idly wondering what to do poor Nellie met her fate.
For a great big stoker by the name of Bert had come into town that day,
And he said “cor blimey what a piece of skirt” and he carried her away.

And she darned his socks and she fried his bacon and she scarecly paused for breath,
And very soon she was overtaken by a fate that is worse than death.
For he said “I’m going but I’ll soon be back and I’ll write to you every week”
But I know darn well that Nellie Clack is up the Barking Creek.

There’s no more to tell of poor little Nell, the Bell of Barking Creek.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: songs of Paddy Roberts
From: GUEST,Woody Wood
Date: 13 May 13 - 02:54 AM

Has anyone got the lyrics to 'Our Litle Village is a real showplace ?

Subject: Lyr Add: Tattooed Lady (Paddy Roberts)
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 04 Mar 13 - 04:57 PM

THE TATTOOED LADY
(Paddy Roberts)

Oh I was a bit of a lad I admit,
My past was a trifle shady.
Until in the end I went right round the bend
And married a tattooed lady.
I immediately saw there were pictures galore,
Round ev'ry available corner.
As I studied her frame, very soon I became
An expert in flora and fauna.
On the back of each knee was a small chimpanzee,
On her thigh was a Knight of The Garter.
And just for a laugh they had put on her calf
Eight bars of the Moonlight Sonata.
One evening I found as I ambled around
I was feeling an absolute Charlie
'Cos I couldn't be sure if the sketch on her jaw
Was Picasso or Salvador Dali.

Some things I foud out I just won't talk about,
I find it's inclined to embarrass.
But I give you my word, thought it may sound absurd,
It was just like The Louvre in Paris.
On one of her feet, you were liable to meet
A Master of Hounds in his habit.
And right round her waist, in impeccable taste,
Was a python devouring a rabbit.
I loved all the ships on one side of her hips
The view in Peru on the other.
But I was struck dumb when I found on her tum
A caricature of her mother.
For this was much more than a man could endure,
Though I made the most earnest endeavour.
So I scuttled away, and I'm happy to say
It was Ta ta tattoo for ever,
Ta ta tattoo for ever,
Ta ta tattoo (2 bar run) for ever

Lyrics transcribed from "Paddy Roberts tries again"

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: songs of Paddy Roberts
From: Gurney
Date: 03 Jul 11 - 03:51 AM

Can't, I'm afraid. A friend has the LP.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: songs of Paddy Roberts
From: Gurney
Date: 02 Jul 11 - 05:08 PM

A missing verse from The Tattooed Lady up there. I think.

Some things I found out, I just won't talk about,
I find it's inclined to embarrass,
but I give you my word, though it may sound absurd,
It was just like the Louvre in Paris.

I'll check when I get a minute to sort the LP out.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: songs of Paddy Roberts
From: GUEST,cHARLES rICHARDS
Date: 01 Jul 11 - 05:07 PM

tHE MONKEY DEFINITELY HAD A BLUE BEHIND

AND OF COURSE BOOM BOOM THE HORSE

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: songs of Paddy Roberts
From: GUEST,Bridget The Dame
Date: 26 Sep 10 - 06:35 PM

Peter, I've been looking for the lyrics to this wonderful song for ages. Thank you so much for recording them here. Bridget x

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: songs of Paddy Roberts
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 27 Aug 10 - 06:31 PM

MERRY CHRISTMAS YOU SUCKERS has been posted in its own thread, here.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: songs of Paddy Roberts
From: GUEST,Johan
Date: 25 Aug 10 - 07:47 AM

Anybody got a recording and/or the rest of the lyrics for this?

She's the angel of the great white way
you will see her night and day
We're mighty proud of Sally
the sunshine of the ally
the angel of the great white way

You'll know her by her bonnet
and the crowd she stands apart
there's a red red ribbon on it
and a place for everyone in her heart

Subject: Lyr Add: AUNTIE BRIDGET (Paddy Roberts)
From: Peter the Squeezer
Date: 24 Aug 10 - 09:14 AM

Found this one on an old LP record -

AUNTIE BRIDGET
(Paddy Roberts)

Little Auntie Bridget, living down in Dorset,
Went to take a bath one day.
Got her pedal digit stuck up in the faucet,
Found she couldn't get away.

Gosh, you should have seen her - picture her demeanour,
Tugging at her toe in vain.
Then, to cap it all, she saw the window cleaner
Peeking through the window pane.

What a situation - miles of explanation -
Auntie feeling such a dope,
Trying to carry on a friendly conversation
Covered in confusion and soap.

She pulled herself together - talked about the weather -
Said "I'm glad it's turned out fine".
Then the window cleaner, muttering "Well I never!"
Went and dialled 999.

Soon the place was buzzing - firemen by the dozen
Kicking up a frightful noise -
Six assorted coppers, several passing shoppers,
And a couple of butcher boys.

Blimey, what a caper - pictures in the paper -
Someone from the BBC,
Working like a beaver with a tyre lever
Trying to get the darned toe free.

Little Auntie Bridget soon began to fidget,
Said "If I could be so bold.
Either you must go out, or get my ruddy toe out,
The water's getting far too cold".

Suddenly a copper seized upon a chopper -
Swung it round his head, and CHOP.
When the mighty blow came, Auntie Bridget's toe
Came out, with a resounding plop.

So the story ended, but there's quite a splendid
Sequel, I am pleased to say.
The window cleaner, Walter, led her to the altar
In the merry month of May.

Members of the force came. The fire brigade of course came
To lead them down the primrose path -
And the superintendent, looking quite resplendent
Wore the order of the bath.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: songs of Paddy Roberts
From: GUEST,PJB
Date: 10 Aug 10 - 12:21 PM

I have lyrics and records of Paddy Roberts songs, but can't find the music scores anywhere. Are they published? Where can I get them?

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: songs of Paddy Roberts
From: GUEST
Date: 26 Feb 10 - 01:24 PM

Did Paddy Roberts sing :nothing ever happens to some girls,there the sort that most men prefer,but they'd be so happy if they only knew how to do the sort of naughty things that other girls do

Subject: Lyr Req: THE ARCHITECT (Paddy Roberts)
From: GUEST,Annie
Date: 21 Sep 08 - 09:09 PM

THE ARCHITECT
(Paddy Roberts)

Once there was an awful lot of nothing, just nothing,
No sun, no moon, no stars, no earth, no nothing, no nothing.
Then the great architect he planned and he planned,
And he gathered it together in the palm of his hand,
And a whole lot of nothing was turned into something,
The sea, and the sky, and the land.
It was just as he meant it to be,
So he said to himself, said he:

I need the birds for the air,
And the beasts for the fields,
And the fishes to swim in the sea.

The jellyfish, the cuttlefish, the lobster, and the whale,
The salmon and the sturgeon and the whiting,
Big fish with tentacles and stings in the tail,
And little fish with neon lighting,
The raven and the wren, and the little red hen,
And the cheeky little London sparrow,
The ostrich and the owl and the skinny guinea fowl,
And the robin that was shot with an arrow,
And of course,
The horse,
Of course.

The elephant, the buffalo, the badger and the beaver,
The camel with the look so refined,
The pekinese, the poodle-dog, the spaniel, the retriever,
The monkey with the little blue behind,
And they all lived together in perfect peace of mind.

He saw that ev'rything was 'cording to the plan,
But in no time at all the trouble all began
With that complicated, overrated, good-for-nothing creature
That is known as man.

Black man, white man, red man, yellow man,
Every man a-fightin' and a'-feudin' with his fellow man,
Nobody satisfied with his lot,
Everybody wantin' what he hasn't got.

Russians, Prussians, Japanese, Chinese,
Negroes, Dagoes, Yankees, Limeys,
Each one pullin' down his neighbours' fence.
That sort of thing just don't make sense.

'Cause some got brains; some got sinew.
That's the way that the world was planned.
Some get so that they can't continue.
All they need is a helping hand.

But one wants one, t'other wants t'other,
Pa 'gainst son and brother 'gainst brother,
Nobody knows what he's shoutin' for.
Ev'rybody's shoutin' for more and more and more,
And more,
And more.
What for?

Why don't they realise that once there was an awful lot of nothing,
Just nothing.

Subject: Lyr Add: VALERIE WILKINS (Clive Harvey)
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 07:57 PM

Rondie - the song you've mentioned sounds like "Valerie Wilkins" by Clive Harvey of Roaring Jelly. Later than the 60s though - it is on their second LP "In the Roar" -TOPIC 12TS420- released in 1981. See previous thread valerie wilkins

Kitty

VALERIE WILKINS
(Clive Harvey)

Valerie Wilkins comes to play, but she is always leader
She always gets her own way, the rotten selfish bleeder
And the reason she bosses me, I'm three foot seven she's four foot three
And besides she's 3 months older than me so I do what I'm told
'cause she is six and a quarter, and I'm just six years old

Who's that knocking on my door,
big Valerie Wilkins and she lives next door
Curses, curses, she wants to play at nurses and I want to play at war!

When she's in a good mood, she lets me play at cowboys
but today she's got her nurses apron on,
so we'll have to play at hospitals now boys
And there's no fun for me in store
for she makes me lie in bed for an hour or more
and pretends I've got pneumonia when I've only got a cold
'cause she is six and a quarter, and I'm just six years old

Who's that knocking on my door,
big Valerie Wilkins and she lives next door
Curses, curses, she wants to play at nurses and I want to play at war!

Then one day at teatime, I said I wanted to play with my rifle
But Valerie threw a tantrum, she spat straight in my trifle
And blimey she screamed at me,
she pulled my hair and she kicked me on the knee
causing me to spill my tea all on my sausage roll
'cause she is six and a quarter, and I'm just six years old

Who's that knocking on my door,
big Valerie Wilkins and she lives next door
Curses, curses, she wants to play at nurses and I want to play at war!

Three months later I realised, I was six and a quarter
I'd caught up with Valerie, could hardly hold my water
and I was happy as could be,
but when I told my mum she explained to me
You can never be as old as Valerie, and she began to laugh
'cause I was six and a quarter - Yeah! but she was six and a half

Who's that knocking on my door,
big Valerie Wilkins and she lives next door
Curses, curses, she wants to play at nurses and I want to play at war

[loud knocking]

go away I'm not coming out

he hasn't finished his tea

he's not well

Subject: RE: Paddy Roberts - lost song lyrics
From: Rondie
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 07:45 PM

There is a song I am keen to identify which I THINK was one of Paddy Roberts's, but cannot be absolutely certain. It is about a small boy and a little girl whom he had a bit of a crush on who I believe was called Valerie (and her surname was given in the lyric - it was something like Appleby I think - I'm fairly certain it had three syllables (clutching at straws here!) All I remember is it was very funny (at least at the time - which was in the sixties).

The only lyrics from it that I recall come towards the end of the song and go something like this:

Curses, curses, she wants to play nurses
And I want to play at war.

I've looked at the titles of the tracks on all the currently available Paddy Roberts albums, and none of them seems to fit with what I remember about this song.

I know this is not much to go on, but is there anybody out there who might throw more light on this - a title, or more lyrics - anything really, that might help be get hold of the
the lyrics, or better still a recording of the song?

Subject: RE: Paddy Roberts
From: alanabit
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 01:01 PM

The Ballad of Bethnal Green. There is another thread up about it now and it has been posted more than once on a Paddy Roberts thread here.

Subject: RE: Paddy Roberts
From: bubblyrat
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 06:38 AM

2nd verse onwards—

Then one fine day, in the month of May,
She found her big romance.
He was smart and sleek, with a scar on his cheek,
And a pair of drainpipe pants.
And she thought, "With you, I could be so true
Through all the years to come!"--
For she loved the gay, abandoned way
That he chewed his chewing gum.

CHORUS: To me rite-fal-la, to me itty(or titty!)-fal-lal,
To me itty-bitty(or titty)-fal-lal-day.

It started well, because he fell
For all her girlish charms,
But he had some doubt, when he caught her out,
In someone else's arms ---
And he said, "Look here! You know, my dear,
This is going a bit too far!"
And he went quite white, and he sloshed her, right
In the middle of her cha-cha-cha. CHORUS

So he went before a man of the law,
Who said, "This will not do!
I've had enough of this sort of stuff
That we get from the likes of you!"
And she was peeved when he received
A longish term in "clink".
In a fit of pique, she married the Greek,
And now she's dressed in mink! CHORUS TWICE.

Subject: RE: Paddy Roberts
From: scouse
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 05:41 AM

Does anyone happen to know the rest of this song..I'm sure it was Paddy that sang and wrote it.

I tell a tale of a jelous male and a girl of sweet sixteen,
She was blond and dumb and she lived with her Mum,
On the verge of Bethnal Green.
She worked all week for a dear old Greek,
For her Dad wad on the Dole.
But her one delight was a Friday night,
when she had a bit of Rock 'n' Roll.

As Aye,
Phil

Subject: RE: Paddy Roberts
From: alanabit
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 04:10 AM

Was that Graucho Marx's song "Lydia The Tattooed Lady"? I believe the Paddy Roberts song was very different. He was a South African, who obviously worked in the UK for a while. This does not sound like him at all.

Subject: RE: Paddy Roberts
From: GUEST,beemer
Date: 03 Mar 07 - 10:36 PM

The song I remember from the 50s. I married a tattooed lady, it was on a cold and winter's day, and tattooed all around her body was the map of the good old USA. And every night before I'd go to sleep, I'd pull down the quilt and I'd take a peep. And on her neck was Minnesota, on her shoulder Tennessee, and tattooed on her back, that good old rack of a sack, the place that I long to be.
And that's all I remember. I'd love to have the rest of the lyrics.

Subject: Lyr Add: FOLLOW ME (Paddy Roberts)
From: Splott Man
Date: 29 Jan 07 - 04:51 AM

Found it!


FOLLOW ME
(Paddy Roberts)

When I was a little wolf cub and you were a brownie,
We always remembered our good turn each day.
First it was your turn, and then it was my turn,
And life was so wonderful, carefree and gay.

Follow me, follow me,
Tonight is the night of the Jamboree.

When I was a little wolf cub and you were a brownie,
We learned all the regulations of which there were lots.
We wandered into the clover, and tried them all over,
And you did your semaphore while I did my knots.

Follow me, follow me,
How's about that for a change of key?

When I was a little wolf cub and you were a brownie,
We did everything a wolf cub and brownie should do.
I wanted to be a boy scout so's I could salute you
With three fingers vertical instead of just two.

Follow me, follow me,
We'll go to the grotto; we'll get slightly blotto.
To hell with the motto! Just fo-o-ollow me.

©1959 Essex Music

Subject: Lyr Add: LOVE IN A MIST (Paddy Roberts)
From: alanabit
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 02:47 PM

One of my favourites from memory. Other 'Catters, please correct my mistakes!


LOVE IN A MIST (Paddy Roberts)

Why do you gaze at me in the craziest fashion?
Can I resist those eyes that are misty with tears?
Is it that you're on the brink of enduring passion?
Or is it because all night you've been suzzling beers?

I'm cast in a spell by the perfume of yellow mimosa
I'm drugged by your charms and the fact that our arms are entwined
But somehow I feel the reason you're stealing closer
Is that if you let go you'll fall on your small behind

I can tell at a glance that you're not dry eyed
But I can't figure out if you're starry eyed or pie eyed
In come kind of a trance you're gently swaying
Is it the music – or is something making you sick?

How you beguile my heart when you're smiling so sweetly
One of two things has happened; I wish I knew which
Do I control your body and soul completely?
Or is it because you're drunk as a fiddler's bitch?

Subject: RE: Paddy Roberts
From: Splott Man
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 09:58 AM

The song is called Follow Me. I think I've got the words at home, I'll check later.

Subject: RE: Paddy Roberts
From: nutty
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 09:39 AM

I have words to Paddy Roberts songs but at the moment I am getting ready to go away for a few days. I will post after the weekend if nobody beats me to it.

Subject: RE: Paddy Roberts
From: GUEST
Date: 25 Jan 07 - 09:09 AM

Hi all. Looking for the words for "When I was a little wolf cub and you were a brownie" anyone able to help me please.
Cheers

Richard

Subject: RE: Paddy Roberts
From: brid widder
Date: 02 Sep 01 - 04:04 PM

had a closer look and there's lots there....thanks both of you.

Subject: RE: Paddy Roberts
From: brid widder
Date: 02 Sep 01 - 03:38 PM

thanks Nigel...thats brill...I tried the forum search nutty but it seems to be mostly about the ballad of Bethnal Green...does anyone else do any of this material? ooops..

Subject: RE: Paddy Roberts
From: brid widder
Date: 02 Sep 01 - 03:35 PM

thanks Nigel...thats brill...I tried the forum search nutty but it seems to be mostly about the Belle of Barking Creek...does anyone else do any of this material?

Subject: Lyr Add: THE TATTOOED LADY (Paddy Roberts)
From:
Date: 02 Sep 01 - 03:00 PM

THE TATTOOED LADY
(Paddy Roberts)

Well I was a bit of a lad I admit,
My past was a trifle shady.
Until in the end I went right round the bend
And married a tattooed lady.
I immediately saw there were pictures galore,
On ev'ry available corner
As I studied her frame, very soon I became
An expert in flora and fauna

On one of her feet, you were liable to meet
A Master of Hounds in his habit.
While right round her waist, in impeccable taste,
Was a python devouring a rabbit.
On the back of each knee was a small chimpanzee,
On her thigh was a Knight of The Garter
And just for a laugh they had put on her calf
Eight bars of the Moonlight Sonata

One evening I found as I ambled around
I was feeling an absolute Charlie
'Cos I couldn't be sure if the sketch on her jaw
Was Picasso or Salvador Dali
I loved all the ships on one side of her hips
The view in Peru on the other.
But I was struck dumb when I found on her tum
A caricature of her mother
Well this was much more than a man can endure,
Though I made the most earnest endeavour.
So I scuttled away, and I'm happy to say
It was Ta ta tattoo for ever,
Ta ta tattoo for ever,
Ta ta tattoo (2 bar run) for ever

Paddy Roberts' "Tattooed Lady" (from memory)
cf. Groucho Marx "Lydia the Tattooed Lady"

Subject: RE: Paddy Roberts
From: nutty
Date: 02 Sep 01 - 01:59 PM

If you put "PADDY ROBERTS" in the Digitrad and Forum search box you will unearth a variety of previos threads ans a load of posted lyrics

Subject: Paddy Roberts
From: brid widder
Date: 02 Sep 01 - 01:46 PM

does anyone remember Paddy Roberts...I remember listening to my brother's records in the sixties...I'd love to hear them again...and wonder if anyone has the lyrics to ' The Tattooed Lady' or When i was a Little Wolf cub and you were a Brownie'...if there is a site for Paddy Roberts I'm sure one of you will know of it....