morris dancing jokes

Subject: morris dancing jokes
From: emmaorange
Date: 16 Apr 02 - 04:26 PM

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Hi, I want to find some good morris dancing jokes. I've tried searching on the web but found nothinh good so far. if anybody knows any, please let me know.

Thanks Emma

Subject: RE: morris dancing jokes
From: GUEST,greg stephens
Date: 16 Apr 02 - 04:41 PM

Morris dancing jokes? Plenty. Good morris dancing jokes? hmmmmm. Well, maybe the jingle bang jingle bang jingle bang jingle one.

Subject: RE: morris dancing jokes
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 16 Apr 02 - 05:08 PM

Why do people do line dancing?

So Morris dancers have something to laugh at...

A bus load of blind people on a day trip stop at a pub. The coach driver asks if some of the lads can have a game of football on the car park out back.

"How can they do that?" asks the Landlord. "Seeing as they are blind and all that..."

"Well, it's quite easy" says the driver. "They have a special ball with bells in so they can hear it."

Nothing much happens for fifteen minutes or so when all hell lets loose. Police cars, ambulances, fire engines, the lot! Policeman rushes in the pub.

"What the hell is going one" he cries "We have had a report of some bunch of yoboes kicking a Morris dancer to death."

This is a real one - Fire Engine driving past a Morris team. "Which one of you is Morris?" laughs one of the Firemen.

"Which one of you is Dennis?" Replied the squire...

(Bit subtle I'm afraid - you need to know your UK fire engines for that ine!)

Any use?

Cheers

DtG

Subject: RE: morris dancing jokes
From: Doug Chadwick
Date: 16 Apr 02 - 05:27 PM

Some morris dancers were performing at a festival and one of the spectators decided that he'd he like to have a go. He made some enquiries and wais given a form to fill in. He completed the first parts OK ... Name ? Address? Age ? ….
Then he came to the last question – "Have you been circumcised?".
Not wishing to divulge such personal information without good reason, he discussed the point with one of his friends.
"Why do you think they need to know if I've been circumcised?" he asked.
"Well!" replied his friend "you have to be a complete prick to be a morris dancer."

Subject: RE: morris dancing jokes
From: Eric the Viking
Date: 16 Apr 02 - 06:37 PM

I used to be a Morris dancer, but I kept falling off the bonnet (hood-for the USA)

used to be a tap dancer, but broke my leg falling into the sink

Used to be a line dancer, but the pegs got in my way.

Sorry!

Subject: RE: morris dancing jokes
From: Guessed
Date: 17 Apr 02 - 09:57 AM

OK someone has to ask how many Morris Men (or women if you insist) does it take to change a light bulb
Well.... only one, but the rest of the side have to get so drunk that the room turns round

OK you are driving down a 20% gradient and your brakes fail. You come to a fork in the road (bifurcation to you). On the left is a hedgehog/moggy/poodle (del as app), on the right is a Morris Man. NOW...... which way do you turn?
RIGHT
- business before pleasure!

Subject: RE: morris dancing jokes
From: brid widder
Date: 17 Apr 02 - 12:10 PM

Why do Morris dancers wear bells?... to annoy blind people too.

& Sid Kipper reckons it was his idea to have Morris dancers at Festivals... so people will come into the concerts!!