BS: Meaningless phrases

Subject: Meaningless phrases
From: GUEST,Paul
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 11:03 AM

Just been listening to the news, and it was reported that "George Best will stay in hospital for 'some time'"

It struck me how utterly meaningless that phrase was. 'Some time' could be a fraction of a millisecond or 10 billion years.

Any other utterly meaningless phrases?

Paul

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Schantieman
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 11:11 AM

Needless to say, there are plenty more out there...

Steve

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: GUEST
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 11:12 AM

"public enquiry"

"open government"

"folk music"

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Amos
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 11:31 AM

Unidentified sources?

War on terrorism?

The Americanpeople?

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: catspaw49
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 11:38 AM

I have heard "alleged victim" on several occasions and it seems to me that a guy laying dead on the floor isn't an "alleged victim" but a pretty sure thing!

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 11:44 AM

"Alleged" is the way the news media get around responsibility for the characterization. It's the equivalent of saying "the dead body that someone claimed was a victim."

A dead body may not be a "victim", in theory at least. He may have died of natural causes or an accident, in which case he wouldn't be a "victim". Never mind that he's got a big bullet hole going in his back and coming out his front.

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: GUEST,Hippie Chick
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 11:45 AM

George Carlin has lists and lists of meaningless phrases in his books "Napalm and Silly Putty" and "Brain Droppings" Both books are side splitters. IMO.

HC

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Schantieman
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 11:48 AM

I am reminded of a piece in 'Picking Sooty Blackberries' where Graham and John (I think) discuss some of Keith's favourite oxymorons. Open government (above) is in there as is 'military intelligence!.

I would add 'rock music' to the list as well, but I won't since it might offend.

To get back to the subject, how about 'at this moment in time' and about 85% of what most politicians say?

Steve

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: GUEST,Les B.
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 12:55 PM

One you used to see was "attributed to White House sources" - until some wag came up with "attributed to White Horse souses" (it was a then popular brand of whiskey).

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: GUEST,fred miller
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 01:17 PM

When a guy puts something in a precarious spot, before he walks away from it he says the magic incantation "It's not going anywhere." When I worked as a museum art handler a guy did this so often that I finally said "You never think anything is going anywhere." He said "Just something I've learned from life." I've always liked the phrase "conducting their own investigation" and I like to use it when I get in trouble, i.e. "I'm sorry I was late again, I'm conducting my own investigation." Another good excuse for being late is "I fell into a burning ring of fire." There are also meaningless phrases that are wonderfully evocative, like McCartney's "wearing the face that she keeps in a jar by the door" or David Mamet's "look on their face like they've been fucked with a dead cat"-- which was cut from the movie of his play.

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: open mike
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 01:57 PM

there are other threads on oxymorons here- not sure where but i've seen 'em on mud cat... any one have a link?? more than meaningless, they actually cancel each other out-they have opposite meanings connected together- (if that means anythng??)

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 02:11 PM

Cheap at half the price - never understood that one. Surely cheap at twice the price makes more sense? Best I saw recently was at a car salesroom where they were promising a minimum part exchange of up to £1000! Huh? But the one that takes the biscuit (Hmmm - now there's another) must be from the shipping forecast - Precipitation is in sight. Can't they just say they can see it's raining?

Cheers

Dave the Gnome

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Schantieman
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 02:16 PM

Ah, yes, but it might be snow, hail, sleet, cats & dogs, showers, drizzle.....all of which, with the possible exception of the domestic animals, have different meteorological significance.

Bring back Finisterre, I say!

Steve

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Gareth
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 02:23 PM

Have a nice day, now.

Aaaarrrggghhh!

Gareth

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Ebbie
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 02:27 PM

"I think you can make it", used by a passenger scouting for oncoming traffic. Suppose s/he is wrong? "Sorry"?

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: katlaughing
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 02:28 PM

When I was a nurse's aid and, later, an emergency med. tech., we were not allowed to write any definitive notes in the patients' charts; that distinction was left for the lawdgawdalmightydawcters, so ALWAYS had to post such things as "Patient appears to be hungry, etc." We couldn't just say they were starving their asses off and ready for solid food! It really got ridiculous and it all came under the realm of "making a diagnosis."

My favourite, made up by a friend in sales for when our manager would ask us for sales projections...she'd say how much she thought she was going to sell, he'd say "how sure are you"...she'd say which ones were for sure, then he say "how about the others" and she say, "those are possible for-sure maybes!"

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: DMcG
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 02:30 PM

My boss once phoned a company and asked was so-and-so in. "Not as such" came the reply. I still can't give it a meaning after some years...

My wife's most common response when I lose something is "Well, it must be somewhere".

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: alanabit
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 02:40 PM

I always thought "Wearing the face that she keeps in a jar by the door" was a reference to make up. Women talk about "putting on their faces". It's a great line whether you take it literally or figuratively. Depending on its context, the casual, "How are you?" can be pretty meaningless. Very often the speaker isn't the slightest bit interested!

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: GUEST,HelenJ
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 02:59 PM

"By and large".

BTW "Hippie Chick" your name is that of my cats' mother. She was Sugar Cube Hippie Chick and she produced two of the most beautiful British Blues you ever saw - (even though one of them wees on me when I'm in bed!)

Will try to think of some more senseless quotations.

HelenJ.

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: katlaughing
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 03:01 PM

At this juncture overused by the elder shrub

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 04:19 PM

"To be perfectly honest..." or "To tell you the truth..."

I once worked for a guy who overused this phrase to the point where it was laughable. He would attach it to the most mundane statements: Q. "What time are you going to lunch today?" A. "To be perfectly honest, I might skip lunch today."

I figure these aren't necessarily meaningless phrases. I interpret them as shorthand for "It's painful to be honest on this point. I'm tempted to lie or evade the issue. But I'll take a risk and tell you the truth anyway." For example, Q. "What do you think of our new manager?" A. "To tell you the truth, I think he's an idiot." (Even if "idiot" is an exaggeration, we know what you mean.)

By overusing the phrase, he made me think, if he has this much anxiety about telling the truth in such ordinary situations, what will he do if a really difficult problem comes up? As it turns out, when difficult problems did come up, he didn't handle them very well. He tended to lose his temper, make wild threats, etc.

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: van lingle
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 04:32 PM

Made popular during the Senate Watergate hearings "...at this point in time." Always rankles me. vl

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Kim C
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 04:56 PM

I'll always think of you as a dear friend.

I'd never want to hurt you in any way, but...

Don't worry so much.

Personally I thought of Eleanor Rigby's face in the jar as the happy face she wore to cover up the fact that she was lonely.

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Deda
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 05:12 PM

Watergate era left us the gem, "At this point in time.." (as opposed to this point in space? In depth? In what else, exactly?) My husband loves the expressions "pound the pavement" and "take a dim view", they're both kind of ridiculous. He frequently say, "I'm taking a hard look and a dim view of things" -- in the fridge, say, or in the mailbox. And a few years back when it seemed as though NATO's sole function was to threaten air strikes that never happened, we started using "threatened NATO air strikes" to mean "didn't like what was going on but couldn't do much about it" -- as in, his response to dinner being late twice in a row was to threaten NATO air strikes, or a kid's reaction to the end of summer vacation was to threaten NATO air strikes -- although with the grievous history of school shootings in recent years, that last one isn't as light-hearted as it should be. "If you don't get your feet off the coffee table I'm going to threaten NATO air strikes."

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Micca
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 05:56 PM

I once saw a sign in the window of a shop selling wine( UK off licence) that said, " Superior Vin Ordinaire"... puzzled me for a time that one..

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: catspaw49
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 07:08 PM

I think you can safely add to this list almost anything written here by Little Hawk or Amos.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Amos
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 07:18 PM

Spaw:

You may not realize it -- in fact I am sure you do not -- but there is an important disitinction between "meaningless" language and "language I can't cope with or understand". I think your problem is in the latter category. You can compensate for this, however, by farting for us more often. That way, you won't feel left out! :>) Wodda boggin!

A

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: GUEST
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 07:31 PM

"I've read a good number of his books"

Please define a 'good number' Are 1 and 2 evil numbers?

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: katlaughing
Date: 02 Aug 02 - 07:57 PM

going to go take a piss (US)

No, literally, where ya gonna take it? On a date, to meet your mom, tell us??!!

errata: the shrub one should say "wouldn't be prudent at this juncture"

Spot on, Spaw!!

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: khandu
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 12:09 AM

Most slogans are meaningless...on every Wal-Mart (anyone else refer to it as WallyWorld) is written "We Sell For Less"...Sell what for less than who?

"Miller-Made the American Way"...yeah, so is every other American made beer.

Nuprin...Little, Yellow, Different, Better, yeah it is little, it is yellow, yes it is different because it is little and yellow, but better? Than what?

Most ads are meaningless phrases.

brought to you by Mudcat-25% less BS!

khandu

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Big John
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 07:37 AM

I'm glad you asked that question.

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: kendall
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 08:16 AM

Supper premium, Tax and spend democrats, for the most part,

(by and large is a sailing term having to do with the set of the sails)

irregardless, lots of anything. a number of things.

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: GUEST,Fred Miller
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 09:28 AM

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: GUEST,Fred Miller
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 10:09 AM

Deda, I love threatened Nato Air strikes and will adopt it.

Kat, almost anything uttered by the elder shrub turned out to be meaningless and so should be out of bounds, too easy, like hunting cows. My own favorite was when in a debate, about pursuing tax evaders, he said he "preferred to trust the American people." Cool, no more IRS! Send what you think is fair.

Guest, "a good number" is a rare positive expression with no corresponding negative. The reverse is much more common. My clothes are shevelled, this place is in a total state of array, and I'm going up to bed at a godly hour, to read a bad number of books. (By the way, "Guest" is my cat's name!)

I wonder if it's off-topic to include comparisons which get plugged back into themselves like a figurative extension cord, an electrical snake-biting-it's-tail symbol for infinity. When in a sauna someone says It's like a sauna in here. When getting on a bike for the first time in years, "it's like riding a bike." My wife worries about taking baths during a storm, but I figure the odds are like being struck by lightning.

It's interesting how people take the Eleanor Rigby line,the face in the jar by the door, i.e. as make-up, or a happy face--I always took it that she had a look on her face like she'd been fucked with a dead cat.

On the sarcophagus of a mummy at the children's museum in Indianapolis, painted on the breastplate there is a round "face" with two dots for eyes and a deadpan mouth, from which the Happy Face may have evolved. The smile associated with the Happy Face is, to judge from somber old photographs, a fairly recent innovation. On faces and Paul McCartney: Paul McCartney is, I think, a Facetarian, and won't eat anything with a face. Also; Picasso scholars and art historians continue to neglet his significant "Paul McCartney" period in the twenties, including such works as The Pipes of Paul McCartney, Two Paul McCartneys Reading a Letter, and a silverpoint drawing, Paul McCartney Abducting a Woman.

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: X
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 12:17 PM

'Nine out of ten doctors recommend 'it.' Just what in the hell is 'it?'

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Catherine Jayne
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 12:47 PM

"This isn't going to hurt".......you KNOW its going to hurt when you hear this!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Banjer
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 01:01 PM

Going back a few posts to the phrase, 'To be honest about it' or 'Tell you the truth'....This one is so stupid when you think about it. If you ask a question and are told, To be honest about it....., doesn't that mean that everything else told to you by that individual is a lie?

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: catspaw49
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 01:16 PM

Carlin, in his last special mentioned one that has bothered me. The messages on phone recorders almost always includes, "We can't come to the phone right now"...........I think I figured that one out because the machine answered.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 02:08 PM

The word "um" is apparently meaningless, yet it might have some meaning. Depending on the context, it might mean, "Don't interrupt me! I need to pause for a second, but I'm not finished talking yet." In response to a question, it might mean, "I need a few seconds to consider my answer. Don't assume I'm ignoring you or I didn't hear you just because I didn't answer immediately."

This was brought home to me one day when I actually heard someone SHOUT the word "um". It was in a factory, the two people were several feet apart, and they had to shout to be heard over the noise of the machines. One said, "LARRY! WHEN'S THIS JOB GOING TO BE DONE?" and Larry shouted back, "UM!...IN ABOUT AN HOUR!" I had to laugh.

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 03:30 PM

"A Magazine Dedicated to Blues and Folk Music"

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: M.Ted
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 03:32 PM

"Meaningless phrases" is a meaningless phrase.

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Amos
Date: 03 Aug 02 - 06:24 PM

Well, perhaps we should call them paradoxical, self-contradictory, pretentius, semantically challenged, oxymoronic, vague, obscure, evasive, circumloquacious, or just ridickle-dockle.

I just unwrapped a health-bar thing which informs me on the wrapper that it contains "Natural flavor with other natural flavor".

Kinda leaves ya guessin', huh?

LOL!

A

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: John O'L
Date: 04 Aug 02 - 02:17 AM

Can I just say something here?

Or,

Can I just ask one question?

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: GUEST,ummerrr- transparent=clearasmud?
Date: 04 Aug 02 - 02:58 AM

In the absense of any real ideas GW Bush will now, I read, make Washington more 'transparent'. Does this mean we can now see through the shenanigans or that Washington has just realized they were caught fixing the election / war whatever?

On the other foot, could it be that too much high priced old stinky cruddy coffee has become so common the public will gladly pay even more for empty cups? Transparent Coffee now the future of high yield investment!

Or it could also be that Maul Wart USA is now planning a new ad campaign "Yoh Maul Wart will make yoh dollah go further " So they can now truthfully report - "Yoh dolla go to China, to Africa, to India, to Maul Wart"? Is 'transparent' a word for bigger things? Could it be inserted where one could have said ' we were caught fixing the books to make stealing your money but we are the GOP and can do to you what ever we please since we own the Judiciary'

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: GUEST,Gurney
Date: 04 Aug 02 - 03:56 AM

Or most songs by Don McLean. Like them though. G.

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 04 Aug 02 - 05:13 PM

It was in the last place I looked.

Well of course, would you carry on looking? Well I found it 10 minutes ago but I thought I'd carry on looking.....

Duh!!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: SINSULL
Date: 04 Aug 02 - 06:25 PM

It's neither here nor there. My nephew uses this one to shut up disgruntled customers and it works. At least they don't argue that it is here or there.

When my manager gets too pushy about projected sales numbers, I hold up a ream of paper and start trotting out the "definite maybies".

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Bill D
Date: 04 Aug 02 - 07:14 PM

"handsome is as handsome does"

...now, is that about as close to a tautology as you can get?

I also could never see the profundity in "What goes around, comes around"

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: bflat
Date: 04 Aug 02 - 09:02 PM

"I should think." Well, yeah, you should before you open your mouth. It is too wishy-washy.

Ellen

Subject: RE: BS: Meaningless phrases
From: Mr Happy
Date: 05 Aug 02 - 05:06 AM

i'm frequently exceedingly irritated by adverts portraying music groups/ albums as being 'highly acclaimed'

by who?

also car makers ads will say 'car of the year'- only in their own opinion!

doctors/dentists/scientists recommend....

well if they're employed by the ad makers, they'll say anything.

'real dry blackthorn cider-with added sugar & sweeteners' yukk!