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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 25 Jan 17 - 10:29 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 25 Jan 17 - 09:56 PM
Amos 25 Jan 17 - 08:46 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 25 Jan 17 - 01:03 PM
Rapparee 25 Jan 17 - 09:14 AM
Rapparee 24 Jan 17 - 09:32 PM
Rapparee 24 Jan 17 - 09:21 PM
gnu 24 Jan 17 - 08:31 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 24 Jan 17 - 05:32 PM
Acme 24 Jan 17 - 04:10 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 24 Jan 17 - 04:00 PM
Acme 24 Jan 17 - 11:27 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 24 Jan 17 - 10:33 AM
Rapparee 24 Jan 17 - 09:19 AM
gnu 24 Jan 17 - 07:15 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 23 Jan 17 - 11:15 PM
Rapparee 23 Jan 17 - 09:49 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 23 Jan 17 - 08:59 PM
keberoxu 23 Jan 17 - 04:50 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 23 Jan 17 - 11:22 AM
Rapparee 23 Jan 17 - 09:16 AM
Acme 22 Jan 17 - 10:03 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 22 Jan 17 - 09:02 AM
Donuel 22 Jan 17 - 12:09 AM
Rapparee 21 Jan 17 - 10:29 PM
keberoxu 21 Jan 17 - 03:57 PM
gnu 20 Jan 17 - 06:30 PM
keberoxu 20 Jan 17 - 12:45 PM
Rapparee 20 Jan 17 - 08:25 AM
Acme 20 Jan 17 - 12:13 AM
Rapparee 19 Jan 17 - 10:20 PM
Rapparee 19 Jan 17 - 10:14 AM
Rapparee 18 Jan 17 - 08:21 PM
Acme 18 Jan 17 - 07:07 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 18 Jan 17 - 05:47 PM
gnu 18 Jan 17 - 05:37 PM
Rapparee 17 Jan 17 - 09:39 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 17 Jan 17 - 05:08 PM
gnu 17 Jan 17 - 11:28 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 17 Jan 17 - 10:16 AM
Rapparee 17 Jan 17 - 08:06 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 16 Jan 17 - 11:21 PM
Rapparee 16 Jan 17 - 09:33 PM
Rapparee 16 Jan 17 - 09:31 PM
gnu 16 Jan 17 - 01:38 PM
Acme 16 Jan 17 - 12:57 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 16 Jan 17 - 11:26 AM
Rapparee 16 Jan 17 - 10:26 AM
Rapparee 15 Jan 17 - 09:09 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 15 Jan 17 - 06:20 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jan 17 - 10:29 PM

Gracious! Amos is in new haven! Try to stay out of yale, ja?

Have you found the Lost Treasure of the North Carolina Piedmont yet? It's supposed to be buried somewhere around Hillsborough.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 25 Jan 17 - 09:56 PM

Hooray for Amos's new old house!
Hooray for Maggie Dog having a place to cavort!
Hooray for Amos for not keeling over dead while unpacking!
Hooray for Hillsborough, NC for not having any Trumps living there!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Jan 17 - 08:46 PM

Hello, Mom, and hello sibs all! Forgive me; I have been carving my way back to cyber space through a dense forest of man-eating Bekins Boxes (boxius Bekinses) who will grab a man by the wrist and snap his spine with one twist of gravity, drain the life blood from his like a child-bearing copperhead, and leave him him limp and wasted fearing to move until dawn. M y steadfast Leatherman at hand, I carved and tore at the frabjous foe. Box after box, after box. And still they came.

And as if that weren't enough I was beset bya plague of Internet Connectivity Wobblies whose fearsome screams can strike terror into the stoutest heart. They, too, I conquered, thanks to my trusty iPhone and my deadly tongue and keen wit.

The Frumptious Buyer beleaguered me, and the Gross american Lender nearly undid me (usuruous Americanus) with his time-stealing breath.

Now, we have every box unboxed and most furniture has found a place for now, and after carving open sixty-two cases of books, I have managed to connect my beloved puter to the new Internet of the South (Timus Warnerus Southronitus) and make my way, scarred, aching, exhausted, bruised, battered, bloodied and limping but unbowed, mind you, back to Mom's welcoming bosom.

The house is everything we hoped--the ancient (1859) stairs creak with the ghostly memories of antebellum merchants and fiery rebellious youths and their beloveds from long ago, now returned to dust in form, but still alive in the eaves of spirit. It is large and comfortable, with a wholly redone infrastructure from foundation up, modern appliances, tastefully integrated into the original aura of the old place so that the ancient and the brand-new combine in harmonious decorum.

Wife, son and myself are very happy with the town, the neighbors, the street, the house, and the dog is delighted with her expansive domain, a large fenced-in back yard where she can cavort. I played a set at the nearby Nash Strreet tavern last night, where Mayor Tom is a regular, and he 'llowed as it was pretyy darn good and I should consider myself a local now.

Thanks a million to Stilly for her kind hospitality, from which we slipped away all too soon. It was one helluva Nodyssey, let me tell ya, but we have landed safe and found our haven port at last. I sahll never move house again, even if the Trumps move to Hillsborough,.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 25 Jan 17 - 01:03 PM

I must admit to mixed feelings about no longer playing in a Celtic band. I miss playing for audiences. I miss the musical proficiency that comes with regular band practice. I don't miss playing at Burns Night dinners and having to pretend to to enjoy bagpipes, haggis, and some damned fool reciting "Tae a Moose, on Turning Her Up in Her Nest with the Plough."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jan 17 - 09:14 AM

We're record-setting folks here! Broke the records for rain and snow on the same day!!!! And today is Bobby Burns Birthday, so the festivities up at the Legion Hovel will be doubly stupendous.

YES!! The annual Bobby Burns Birthday Booze Bonanza Bash is tonight! There will be the usual Bobby Burn Birthday Booze Bonanza Bash Banquet with the traditional Creamed Haggis on Toast, Steerie-Cauld, Cullen Skink, Bashed Neeps, Champit Tatties, and of course barrels and barrels of the finest Scotch Whiskey. A wild time will be had by all, and the hangovers tomorrow will be phenomenal (photo from last year's Bobby Burns Birthday Booze Bonanza Bash).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jan 17 - 09:32 PM

Record Report


428
SXUS75 KPIH 240743
RERPIH

RECORD EVENT REPORT
NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE POCATELLO ID
1235 AM MST TUE JAN 24 2017

...RECORD DAILY MAXIMUM RAINFALL AND SNOWFALL SET AT POCATELLO ID...

A RECORD RAINFALL OF 0.52 INCH(ES) WAS SET AT POCATELLO ID YESTERDAY. THIS BREAKS THE OLD RECORD OF 0.33 SET IN 1950.

A RECORD SNOWFALL OF 8.6 INCH(ES) WAS SET AT POCATELLO ID YESTERDAY. THIS BREAKS THE OLD RECORD OF 2.8 INCH(ES) FOR THE DAY WHICH WAS SET IN 1993 AND ALSO THE GREATEST 24-HOUR RECORD FOR THE MONTH OF 8.3 INCH(ES) WHICH WAS SET ON JAN 8, 2005.

--------------------


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jan 17 - 09:21 PM

FIVE FOOT DRIFTS!!!!! Buildings collapsing!!! Snow plows rolling over!!!! Schools, businesses, public buildings, universities -- closed!!! Food running short!!! Medical aid not available!!! Continuous shelling!!!! Snowsnowsnowsnow!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 24 Jan 17 - 08:31 PM

Ahhhh, sweet Lysdexia. I yptoed her yell in the sweat moments of extasie. Ahhh, where has my yout goneÉ I shall never be the Sammy.

You ever hear that joke about Sammy Davis Jr. and Dean Martin? It's hilarious but it involves banging a dick on a bed post so that's two risky for pubic forum, eh?

Nasty freezing rain here. If I should happen to lose my internUt connection, remember that


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 24 Jan 17 - 05:32 PM

That's not what I get for Dyslexia. I get her a box of chocolates and a dozen roses.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Jan 17 - 04:10 PM

That's what I get for dyslexia.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 24 Jan 17 - 04:00 PM

And precisely what is meant by "bare and whore? [wince]"? Is it meant to imply that I attempted to rhyme those two words? If so, please reread the poem, paying close attention to the rhyme scheme. "Whore" rhymes with "more" and "bare" rhymes with "there".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Jan 17 - 11:27 AM

bare and whore? [wince]


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 24 Jan 17 - 10:33 AM

Bravo, kind Rap! There's truth in your poesy, though English majors also make decent librarians and managers of bookstores*.

* My seldom-mentioned "career" before hearing the call of the potter's wheel and poverty starvation self-employment.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jan 17 - 09:19 AM

I have a little bachelor's
That keeps me unemployed,
But I know Dunne from Milton
A source of joy and pride!

I can tell iamb from anapest
And a sonnet from an ode,
An epic from a tragedy --
I quote Shakespeare by the load.

Yes, Greek tragedy can make me smile,
And Pope and Chaucer too,
But the "wherewithal" to pay for that --
Well, I use a public loo.

But I recognize great literature
Like Bill Reilly and Glenn Beck!
But still I ask, "Do you want fries?"
For a marketable skill I lack.

There are jobs, even jobs for me,
Well paying jobs, I'm sure,
But somehow I doubt I'll reach them
With a GPA of 1.4.

            --Maximilian Xerxes Lossole, upublished, 2031.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 24 Jan 17 - 07:15 AM

Nicely done, BWL.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 23 Jan 17 - 11:15 PM

As great? Merely as great? Look, I don't go around emancipating slaves on account of Abe does it much better than me. But Abe needs to stick to his President gig and leave the poetry stuff to us English majors with ironic senses of humor.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Jan 17 - 09:49 PM

That's as great as the one I quoted by Abraham Lincoln.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 23 Jan 17 - 08:59 PM

The Bare Hunt

'Twas on a cold December day
When through a field of withered corn
Three hunstmen hiked upon their way
As naked as the day they're born

'Twas not a sight one often sees
A trio of buck-naked men
With willies wagging in the breeze
Their names were Peter, George and Sven

Now these three hunters never failed
To bag the game that they pursued
Be deer or turkey, hog or quail
But ne'er before while in the nude

The reason that it came to pass
That these brave men were in the buff
Was that a wanton little lass
Had stolen all their clothes and stuff

They took her to their hunting camp
To get her drunk and high and stoned
But they passed out, and then the tramp
Took everything those hunters owned

Except she left their guns behind
For they were in a heavy box
Secured with wire and baling twine
And sturdy combination locks

So when the huntsmen did arise
And see that all their clothes were gone
George hollered, "Damn that bitch's eyes!"
And Peter said, "Let's just go home."

But Sven said, "No, I came to hunt
and that is what I plan on doin'.
I will not let some thieving cunt
Turn my weekend into a ruin!"

And so the three grabbed up their guns
And trudged off through the drifting snows
With goosebumps on their naked buns
And frostbite nipping at their toes

The three men they were seen no more
And this sad tale it ends right there
They got their clothes stole by a whore
And froze to death while hunting bare


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 23 Jan 17 - 04:50 PM

Amos?
Amos??
You still alive somewhere?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 23 Jan 17 - 11:22 AM

Mom says there was nothing untoward about the friendship between James Buchanan and William Rufus King. They did basically the same things any other two male friends would do: drink whiskey, play cards, and take turns having sex with goats. Nothing wrong with that, especially since the goats were always female. It would only be controversial if the goats were male.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Jan 17 - 09:16 AM

Mom, I shan't get all political on you. You always told us the things that gentlefolk never discuss are politics, rap music, and religion -- and that they certainly never "kiss and tell."

But I must ask, Mom, what your feelings were about the double election of Chester A. Arthur? And James Buchanan. Was Buchanan really "good friends" with William Rufus King? And what about Harriet Lane? I know you know, Mom. Please tell us!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Jan 17 - 10:03 PM

The only thing that would be good about Pence is that he at least knows how a politician should behave in public, even if he is busy goring health legislation and trying to rescind the good works of the last couple of Democratic administrations. Trump is damned dangerous.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 22 Jan 17 - 09:02 AM

Hi, Mom. Sorry I haven't stopped in for a few days, but the inauguration of he-whose-name-I-shall-not-utter-following-the-word-"President" has adversely affected my sense of humor. Perhaps it will return after the impeachment.

Then again, "President Pence" doesn't exactly make me want to chortle with glee.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 22 Jan 17 - 12:09 AM

THE DEVIL AND BARAK OBAMA

There is a story they tell in the border lands, where Mexico joins American Counties of various diversity and intolerence.
Yes Barak Obama is retired, at least they Air Forced 1 him out of town. There hasn't been a powerfully eloquent orator anything like him in 4 generations. Everyday when Fracking quakes tremble and shudder the earth beneath our feet like distant thunder there are people who remember Barak building to a thunderous finale. Fewer still remember the actual words like "Our Homes have been lost; jobs shed; businesses shuttered. Our health care is too costly; our schools fail too many; and each day brings further evidence that the ways we use energy strengthen our adversaries and threaten our planet. With eyes fixed on the horizon and God's grace upon us,
we carry forth that great gift of freedom and deliver it safely to future generations.". What people actually remember is that Barak may have saved their new Camaro, Charger or Chevy Pick Up to get made after 2008. But fewer still believe it if they watch Fox News.

You see, for awhile he was the biggest man in the country and the world but he wasn't the biggest for long. Soon he couldn't get a speck of cooperation, even for things everyone desperately wanted. There were millions who trusted him right next to good ol Abe and God Almighty. Even as a seedling he had the power to bust through asphalt. Everything he pushed for he earned.

He became a lawyer and a remarkable Constitutional scholar who could have stood before the Supreme Court, but never did. Instead he selected 3 Supreme Court nominees. The one and only case he ever argued is missing from any law review, docket or literature. It's too bad because his soul was probably the only one pure enough and scandal free to dare take on the devil himself who always wins even when he loses. This is the way I have heard this story told;


There was a young man named Donald Trump, who lived at the cross roads of Forest Hills Queens. He wasn't a bad kid to start but being sly and crafty got him into trouble for lots of little things like spit balls. The more they'd sting the more fun it was. For 7th grade he was sent to a Military school Cornwall on the Hudson not
for behavior problems but because his dad wanted to toughen him up and get all the silly spiritual beliefs from Mom drummed out of Donald.

It was amazing what a year of hazing can do.
It teaches unswerving total denial, you learn to follow the rules and align yourself with and suck up to authority. Donald wasn't that lucky. While big for his age, in the showers his size only contrasted
his unique 'hand size'` and brought ceaseless teasing from the older boys. It made Donald crawl inside himself. The isolation, not knowing how to make a bed or shine his shoes, 'the new guy' hazing grew worse every day. One desperate night he cried out for help not knowing help could in fact be bought for very little compensation. And boy oh boy did he ever compensate.


2. Van Horne calls in his yuge note
3. Twitler needs a lawyer.
4. the jury
5. the verdict
6. the end


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Jan 17 - 10:29 PM

Thank you from saving Mom from Disgrace and a Fate Worse That Death.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 21 Jan 17 - 03:57 PM

okay.
I'll do it myself.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 20 Jan 17 - 06:30 PM

I didn't watch the "moment" but I did watch a YT feed of a wee bit of the speech. When he started "whipping up the crowd" with the "righteous" talk stuff, I felt sick inside and had to turn it off. These are dangerous times. Dog help us all.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 20 Jan 17 - 12:45 PM

All I know about circuses is, better not linger behind the elephants.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Jan 17 - 08:25 AM

Be of good heart, dear comrades! For while do we suppose that we know, we truly know not and cannot. For

Too long a sacrifice
Can make a stone of the heart.
O when may it suffice?
That is Heaven's part, our part
To murmur name upon name,
As a mother names her child
When sleep at last has come
On limbs that had run wild.
What is it but nightfall?
No, no, not night but death;
Was it needless death after all?
For England may keep faith
For all that is done and said.
We know their dream; enough
To know they dreamed and are dead;
And what if excess of love
Bewildered them till they died?
I write it out in a verse –
MacDonagh and MacBride
And Connolly and Pearse
Now and in time to be,
Wherever green is worn,
Are changed, changed utterly:
A terrible beauty is born.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 20 Jan 17 - 12:13 AM

Last full day of sanity in the D.C. area, tomorrow the Trump Circus is moving in. Ringling, Barnam and Bailey didn't stand a chance against the competition. What does a circus clown do when the circus closes?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Jan 17 - 10:20 PM

The Bear Hunt

A wild-bear chace, didst never see?
Then hast thou lived in vain.
Thy richest bump of glorious glee,
Lies desert in thy brain.

When first my father settled here,
'Twas then the frontier line:
The panther's scream, filled night with fear
And bears preyed on the swine.

But wo for Bruin's short lived fun,
When rose the squealing cry;
Now man and horse, with dog and gun,
For vengeance, at him fly.

A sound of danger strikes his ear;
He gives the breeze a snuff;
Away he bounds, with little fear,
And seeks the tangled rough.

On press his foes, and reach the ground,
Where's left his half munched meal;
The dogs, in circles, scent around,
And find his fresh made trail.

With instant cry, away they dash,
And men as fast pursue;
O'er logs they leap, through water splash,
And shout the brisk halloo.

Now to elude the eager pack,
Bear shuns the open ground;
Th[r]ough matted vines, he shapes his track
And runs it, round and round.

The tall fleet cur, with deep-mouthed voice,
Now speeds him, as the wind;
While half-grown pup, and short-legged fice,
Are yelping far behind.

And fresh recruits are dropping in
To join the merry corps:
With yelp and yell,--a mingled din--
The woods are in a roar.

And round, and round the chace now goes,
The world's alive with fun;
Nick Carter's horse, his rider throws,
And more, Hill drops his gun.

Now sorely pressed, bear glances back,
And lolls his tired tongue;
When as, to force him from his track,
An ambush on him sprung.

Across the glade he sweeps for flight,
And fully is in view.
The dogs, new-fired, by the sight,
Their cry, and speed, renew.

The foremost ones, now reach his rear,
He turns, they dash away;
And circling now, the wrathful bear,
They have him full at bay.

At top of speed, the horse-men come,
All screaming in a row,
"Whoop! Take him Tiger. Seize him Drum."
Bang,--bang--the rifles go.

And furious now, the dogs he tears,
And crushes in his ire,
Wheels right and left, and upward rears,
With eyes of burning fire.

But leaden death is at his heart,
Vain all the strength he plies.
And, spouting blood from every part,
He reels, and sinks, and dies.

And now a dinsome clamor rose,
'Bout who should have his skin;
Who first draws blood, each hunter knows,
This prize must always win.

But who did this, and how to trace
What's true from what's a lie,
Like lawyers, in a murder case
They stoutly argufy.

Aforesaid fice, of blustering mood,
Behind, and quite forgot,
Just now emerging from the wood,
Arrives upon the spot.

With grinning teeth, and up-turned hair--
Brim full of spunk and wrath,
He growls, and seizes on dead bear,
And shakes for life and death.

And swells as if his skin would tear,
And growls and shakes again;
And swears, as plain as dog can swear,
That he has won the skin.

Conceited whelp! we laugh at thee--
Nor mind, that now a few
Of pompous, two-legged dogs there be,
Conceited quite as you.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Jan 17 - 10:14 AM

Of course, it's the other, little, things that will make his new house his new home. I know that painting it black inside and out is high on the "to do" list. So is installing a larger heating plant (being used to all that warm California weather), such as the one described in this PDF.

Oh, sorry. That's for the kitchen. The new heating plant is kind of hush-hush, but it involves a toriodal plasma containment unit -- it's Amos' own design and he's quite proud of it.

Anyway, welcome to your new house (and home), Amos!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Jan 17 - 08:21 PM

Amos having people from Ft. Bragg coming to help set up the house. How he rates this is classified Tippy-Top Beyond Top Secret. Suffice to say that back in his seafaring days he obtained some very, very, very interesting photographs (including the negatives) of certain people doing certain things. As a result he has what in some circles is called "pull" in getting things accomplished.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 18 Jan 17 - 07:07 PM

According the photos on facebook the moving van arrived this morning, so the magic of turning an empty house into a home has begun.

Hopefully they have a supply of bandaids, neosporin, hydrogen peroxide, tweezers, and also a screwdriver (one each Philips and the regular kind), a pair of pliers, and a hammer. It would also help to have a snack area set up in the kitchen and a coffee pot at the ready. All of that stuff will be needed this week.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 18 Jan 17 - 05:47 PM

Gnu, the reason Father Bourgeois called was to inform parishioners that, in solidarity with the liberal working class social views of Pope Francis, he'd be changing his name to Father Proletariat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 18 Jan 17 - 05:37 PM

Harry Truman... "My choice early in life was either to be a piano player in a whorehouse or a politician. And to tell the truth, there's hardly any difference."

Oh yes there is. Politicians get better "tips".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Jan 17 - 09:39 PM

Bee-Dubya, real Southerners eat it all and then quietly and discreetly spit the bone into the nearest potted palm (if one is in a fine restaurant such as Rosey's Eat Here Get Gas). Should such not be immediately available it can be chewed a la Big Kick, Beech Nut, or Chattanooga Chew and disposed of in a stryofoam cup or to the pocket of your overalls via your hand. Do not attempt to conceal the bone inside your overalls by sliding it under the bib or inside your nosewipe.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 17 Jan 17 - 05:08 PM

With all this talk of food traditions from south of the Mason-Dixon Line, we have yet to ponder the most vexatious question of southern cuisine:

When served a pork chop sandwich, should one disassemble the sandwich and use a knife to remove the bone, or just eat around it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 17 Jan 17 - 11:28 AM

Father Bourgeois called and left a message asking for a return call. Maybe they are looking for new priests? I hear there is a shortage due to the turnover rate.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 17 Jan 17 - 10:16 AM

By the way, Rap, you omitted collard greens from Amos's grocery list. How could you remember fatback and forget collards?

And don't forget the white bread and bologna to make fried bologna sammiches


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Jan 17 - 08:06 AM

Or Higgely-Piggely?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 16 Jan 17 - 11:21 PM

Speaking of Piggly-Wiggly, if they were to merge with Hobby Lobby, would the stores be called Hoggly-Wobbly or Pobbly-Loggly?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jan 17 - 09:33 PM

he'll be all set and rarin' to go!



1. Of the firing on Fort Sumter, April 12, 1861, in the next State south.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jan 17 - 09:31 PM

Yes, the Welcome Wagon, the inducements to join the Sons of the Confederacy, changing his instrument from guitar to banjo, connecting with the local moonshiner, all sorts of things. Eventually he'll find the Winn-Dixie or the Piggly-Wiggly or the Food Lion and lay in some grits, hominy, fatback, sowbelly, cornmeal, salaratus, and black-eyed peas. Why, come the Anniversary1


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 16 Jan 17 - 01:38 PM

I assume there is much to be busy with this day in NC.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Jan 17 - 12:57 PM

That journey also included a woman and a dog, each rode shotgun in a front passenger seat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 16 Jan 17 - 11:26 AM

Yes, generations from now, people will sit around the giant LED that looks a bit like a campfire and tell the tale of two men, a dog, a Martin guitar, and their fateful almost-but-not-quite-transcontinental journey in a pair of Toyota Priuses.

Children will shudder to hear of their bravery as they fought their way through the arid wasteland of Interstate 10, the treacherous badlands of Interstate 20, and the cholera-infested swamps of Interstate 85. And all done in vehicles that didn't even drive themselves, but were controlled by real human beings!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jan 17 - 10:26 AM

I suppose Amos is in his new house by now. I hope that the cannibal zombie ghosts don't eat what few brains Amos has left after all that time in Califoria.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jan 17 - 09:09 PM

From a posting by Amos to Facebook he is reposing on a park bench in North Carolina.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 15 Jan 17 - 06:20 PM

All ya hafta do to get Mom to load on a phone is expand the screen image until that little d becomes a big d.

But it's still a pain in the ass. I'd rather wait until I get back to my motel room where a laptop and free motel wifi are waiting.


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