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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 02 Dec 09 - 11:17 AM
Acme 02 Dec 09 - 11:38 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 02 Dec 09 - 11:46 AM
Rapparee 02 Dec 09 - 12:57 PM
Little Hawk 02 Dec 09 - 01:05 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 02 Dec 09 - 01:51 PM
Rapparee 02 Dec 09 - 02:02 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 02 Dec 09 - 02:21 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 02 Dec 09 - 02:23 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 02 Dec 09 - 02:24 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 02 Dec 09 - 02:25 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 02 Dec 09 - 02:26 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 02 Dec 09 - 02:27 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 02 Dec 09 - 02:28 PM
Little Hawk 02 Dec 09 - 03:07 PM
Rapparee 02 Dec 09 - 03:11 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 02 Dec 09 - 03:19 PM
Amos 02 Dec 09 - 03:24 PM
Rapparee 02 Dec 09 - 03:25 PM
Amos 02 Dec 09 - 04:25 PM
Little Hawk 02 Dec 09 - 05:18 PM
Amos 02 Dec 09 - 05:50 PM
Ed T 02 Dec 09 - 08:16 PM
Janie 02 Dec 09 - 08:20 PM
Amos 02 Dec 09 - 08:42 PM
Janie 02 Dec 09 - 09:01 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 02 Dec 09 - 09:05 PM
Rapparee 02 Dec 09 - 09:16 PM
Bobert 02 Dec 09 - 09:24 PM
Amos 02 Dec 09 - 09:40 PM
Rapparee 02 Dec 09 - 10:09 PM
Amos 02 Dec 09 - 10:16 PM
Rapparee 02 Dec 09 - 10:20 PM
Acme 02 Dec 09 - 11:34 PM
Amos 02 Dec 09 - 11:34 PM
Amos 02 Dec 09 - 11:58 PM
Rapparee 03 Dec 09 - 09:12 AM
Little Hawk 03 Dec 09 - 12:12 PM
Little Hawk 03 Dec 09 - 12:23 PM
Acme 03 Dec 09 - 01:05 PM
Rapparee 03 Dec 09 - 02:06 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 03 Dec 09 - 02:13 PM
Little Hawk 03 Dec 09 - 02:15 PM
Rapparee 03 Dec 09 - 03:07 PM
Amos 03 Dec 09 - 03:57 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 03 Dec 09 - 03:58 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 03 Dec 09 - 04:21 PM
Amos 03 Dec 09 - 04:34 PM
Ed T 03 Dec 09 - 04:48 PM
Ed T 03 Dec 09 - 04:58 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 11:17 AM

I thought satyrs were played by nymphs, no?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 11:38 AM

Would an omniscient performer play a radar?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 11:46 AM

If a satirist does play a satir, does he play it while satting? And since satting, being an illogical mix of present and past, is impossible in our 3D+time universe, does he have to play in some alternate universe where satting is a normal, everyday behavior?

Perhaps Gluon is a satirist.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 12:57 PM

Does that also mean that gals can't play gui-tars?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 01:05 PM

Aha! Rapaire, you said, and I quote: "If you buy it for me, I'll learn to play it. I have no shame."

And THAT is why he should come down there and visit you ASAP!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 01:51 PM

No, Rapaire, a guitarist plays a guitar, known in some circles as a "git-tar". Beginning players often suffer from an affliction which requires them to play Deep Purple's "Smoke on the Water" ad nauseum. As a result, they are frequently advised to "Take that damned thang an' git out th' door with it! If I hear one more so-called 'note' from it I'm gonna break it over yore fuckin' head!"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 02:02 PM

Oh. So it doesn't derive from "...GIT the TAR whupped outa ya!"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 02:21 PM

Yes, it does, in a sense. It depends on whether the person doing the threatening viv-a-vis the git-tar is named Fred or Gladys. Gladys will threaten the guitarist with "gittin' th' tar beat out of ya" while Fred is more direct and will simply threaten to "beat shit out of ya with that fuckin' thing".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 02:23 PM

Now, you're probably wondering where all this lame-assed talk about sitarists and satirists is heading...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 02:24 PM

And the answer is that it's headed to...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 02:25 PM

Drum roll...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 02:26 PM

The next post!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 02:27 PM

This is post #32767.

The binary equivalent of 32767 is 111111111111111!

It is, therefore, a number unique in the annals of MOABdom and I, the MOAB village idiot, lay claim to it!

You have my permission to applaud, grovel, kowtow, throw money, and dance naked on tabletops in my honor.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 02:28 PM

And this is post #32768.

The binary equivalent of 32768 is 1000000000000000, another number unique in the annals of MOABdom. In fact, it is the bestest, most uniquest, big ol' damned number anybody's ever hit in the entire history of the Mudcat Cafe, and I lay claim to it as well!

If you are still applauding, grovelling, kowtowing, throwing money, or dancing naked on tabletops in my honor, you have my permission to continue. You may also chant "Bee-dubya is great!" if the mood strikes.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 03:07 PM

You're losing it, man. I hope they have a nice comfy room ready for you at the NYCFTTS.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 03:11 PM

Yes, but in hex it's only 63722. Of course, you can put it in other bases, for instance:

Base-14        A8630
Base-15        80A55
Base-16        63722
Base-17        4EF7A
Base-18        3FF38
Base-19        32768
Base-20        2AI6A
Base-21        21KDE
Base-22        1G5D0
Base-23        1AB00
Base-24        15B42
Base-25        111I5
Base-26        N4EE
Base-27        KIK8
Base-28        IFFE
Base-29        GK9P
Base-30        F2HK
Base-31        DKQL
Base-32        CDP2
Base-33        BB1B
Base-34        ACCA
Base-35        9HI0
Base-36        8QAQ

But the REALLY magical numbers, for instance, SHIT in base 34, becomes, in other bases, such numbers as

Base-2        100010001101000100101
Base-3        2002221110022
Base-4        10101220211
Base-5        241331210
Base-6        40004525
Base-7        12345440
Base-8        4215045
Base-9        2087408
Base-10 1120805

Aren't numbers fun?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 03:19 PM

Why, thank you, Little Hawk.

In case you're interested, the next really cool binary number to come along will be 1010101010101010, whose decimal equivalent is 43690. You can call dibbzies if ya want. I've had enough glory bestowed upon my humble self already.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 03:24 PM

Dang, BWL, that was a true feat of numerological legerdemain, no mistake. My hat is off to you!!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 03:25 PM

Our own dear mother, MOAB, when converted from base 34, is 892783 in decimal.

This number, being holy, should be reserved for Khandu.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 04:25 PM

What method are you using to assign numerical values to such ephemeral augustitude as Mom's? Surely not a simple A=1, Z=27 algorithm? Have you no decency?



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 05:18 PM

A great dramatic question, Amos! Here's another...

"Is nothing sacred!???"

And another...

"WHAT is the MEANING of this???!!!"

It helps if you get all red in the face and wave your arms around apoplectically when asking such questions. ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 05:50 PM

You are a scamp, Little Hawk. A prankster, a rapscallion, a reprobate, and a rogue. You are a tawdry scalawag, a scoundrel and a jejeune dybbuk. We who are about to have our heads fucked with salute you.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ed T
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 08:16 PM

"Jeez Arnie, this damn chef's hat is too tight and is makin' my brain hurt. No wonder this stuff we put in these cans tastes like crap!" - Hector Boiardi (yes, Chef Boy-R-Dee!!!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 08:20 PM

Hurray! We DID NOT have turkey for supper tonight.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 08:42 PM

In my post about why some puppets sing, and others do not, I am ashamed to discover I posted a bad link, a rare anomaly. In another astute observation, I remark that yon Bobert never comes down to the MOAB, even though he is one of the bullshittingest characters to ever grace the hallowed marble halls of Mudcat. I deduce from these simultaneous anomolies that it is only fit and meet for me to remedy my error.

Some Puppets Sing for Bobert


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 09:01 PM

LOL!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 09:05 PM

I made the mistake earlier today of wasting a perfectly good post by making it to a BS thread started by a GUEST, a practice we all know is no longer allowed. That thread was deleted, and my post went with it. So, not being one to let sleeping dogs lie, I offer for your pleasure and amusement...

MOM's brain.

MOM's brain on drugs.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 09:16 PM

Amos, mon vieux. You'd best lay down for a while now. Take your meds like a good boy, okay?

Bobert has posted here on MOAB several times. Make a game of seeing if you can find them.

As for converting number in base 34 to base 10, it's quite simple. You could probably even do it, but it DOES involve mathematics and I don't want you to get a headache. Just know that I take a number in base 34 (say, the number AMOS) and convert it to decimal (419,316) just as you'd convert any number from one base to another.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bobert
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 09:24 PM

Well, sheet fire...

Here I come in an got this PM mean mouthin' me as this bigass bullshitter and never stickin' my head in this joint (cough) and the PM has this very retarded video of some very retarded puppets singin' about pot??? Like what's that all about???

I mean, ya'll know that I only come 'round this joint (cough) 'bout every 10 thousand posts 'er so and see if I can hit the big zeros but they rigged... Amos has some kinda ball game there and has it rigged so that only he can get the zeros...

(And you thought the puppets were retarded, Boberdz???)

So, I stick my head in here and it's 'bout the same as lst time and the time after that and after that one, too... Meanwhile, there's an all night "I Love Lucy" thing on Channel 397 fir those of you who get satilite TV but ya'll rather sit around with a bunch of stoned out puppets??? And you, LH, outta be ashamed of yerself... You could be out meditatin' on rocks and important stuff but no... You got hang out with the rest of these retards and these wacked out puppets??? Like what is that all about??? What, youy can't get Channel 397??? No, maybe you don't like Lucy??? That it??? Come on... Out with it... The truth will set you free... Heck, you got the hots fir Sarah Palin and even make up stories about havin' her cell phone but then a real hottie is on all night on Channel 397 and you and yer sidekick, Amos, hanging with the cotton an' button stoners...

Plus, their weed ain't even all that great... All that coughin' they're doing ain't 'cause it's good... It's 'cause someone came in an ' stole the bud and left the stems and seeds... So here ya'll are... Sittin' round smokin' stems 'n seeds with Howdy Doody and Clarabell and missing Lucy??? What is that all about??? Oh yeah, I know... You're just tryin' to get to 40K so I'll have somethin' to do with my life fir a day 'er two tryin' to hit the biggie... Well, forget it... I done hit the biggie allready... Me and the Wes Ginny Slide Rule turned this thread backwards... Ha!!! Don't mess with Texas... Next thing ya' know Khany Kandu will be back and Jimmy Carter will be president and it will be all ya'll's fault...

(Thems wouldn't be all that bad, Boberdz...)

Well, even a blind squirrel finds a nut now an' then... Okay, other than those tow possible positive outcomes of mounds of bullshit the rest of it don't compare to Lucy and Ethel...

Opps... Commercial is over...

See ya'll in the funny papers 'er when ya'll get that BS up into the high 39's... Know what I mean??? Good... We really don't have to have this talk again fir a while, do we???

BTW, Happy Columbus Day and don't forget...

...the earth ain't exactly round...

Bobert


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 09:40 PM

Well I tole ya that Bobert was a piece of work, and I am much happier being slapped around with his BS than with some bookmeister's desperate scramble for superiority by using Base 37 alphanumerics. I swan, Rapaire, just cuz you get so excited rubbing your brain cells together is no reason to go showing them to other folks, if you see what I mean.


Regards,

290548(base 30)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 10:09 PM

yuh i c amos. i wunt sho no brane sels no moor. ill b th dum kid frum th mid west i is. say wat du u think bout hog fuchurs n farros n gelts.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 10:16 PM

LOL!! That's my man!! LOL!! If u cn rd rpaire's wrtg u cn gt a gd jb. If u wrt lke rpaire u r 2 dum 2 wrk anywhr.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 10:20 PM

y r u maken fun of me. u dint want me to rub brane sels two gethr n now u mak fun of me. poop on u. so ther.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 11:34 PM

Gosh, but I'm tired. I'll come back and read the last dozen or two posts tomorrow. I had to sit in on jury selection in the village, then stayed to listen to some of the case. Neighbors a few blocks from me are feuding. Too sad.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 11:34 PM

ROFLMAO. Forget it. Acting dumb is too out of character for you, amigo!! You're too smart to act dumb in real life. (The Army is probably an exception).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Dec 09 - 11:58 PM

The storm raged on in the blackened night
The seas and the wind were wild.
Rapaire he swore 'twas the worst damn storm
He'd seen since he was child.

And have the crew were pale with fright
And half were green with motion,
As we pitched and rolled in that bitter cold
Through the mad and heaving ocean.

The timbers groaned and the planks they creaked
And the glass, it kept sinking down.
And we wondered if we were still alive
When seven-ninety came around.

And Ed curled up in the rope's end for'd
And wished he was in some bar,
For all he could hear was the screaming gale
MIdst the smell of hemp and tar.

She plunged uphill and galloped down
And she corkscrewed left and right.
And we prayed for an end to that endless sound,
ANd a glimpse of the dawning light.

But there was no end, and there was no dawn
ANd the storm never died away;
ANd through the night we just hammered on,
Dreaming of thirty-three kay.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Dec 09 - 09:12 AM

The usual question in the National Guard, at drills, and in the Army was "What do you do in REAL life?"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Dec 09 - 12:12 PM

Ha! Ha! Great to hear from Bobert. But how come no one is posting to the Mither of All BS Threads lately?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Dec 09 - 12:23 PM

Oh, wait. Someone just did.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 03 Dec 09 - 01:05 PM

Janie, come on over tonight, if you're out of turkey. We're having turkey soup. :)

Cute video. MOM laughed her ass off and knew ol' Bobertz would put in an appearance.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Dec 09 - 02:06 PM

Poor ol' Bobert. He's not with us any longer.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 03 Dec 09 - 02:13 PM

...and he's not with us any shorter either.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Dec 09 - 02:15 PM

And that's the long and short of it!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Dec 09 - 03:07 PM

Isn't that a dachshund?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Dec 09 - 03:57 PM

None who know the true merit of Mother want to truck with a scammy, tawdry, second-rate drooling imitation, Little Hawk. It would be like living on Cheet-Ohs and Mcburgers.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 03 Dec 09 - 03:58 PM

Yes, but don't tell the dachshund. You'll spoil his self image. He thinks he's the long and tall of it. "Short" is not in a dachsund's vocabulary. Neither is "denial".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 03 Dec 09 - 04:21 PM

I agree about the "Mither" thread. I'm offended by it. For one thing, I don't DO Scots Gaelic or Erse or whatever you call it. How would you feel if I were to start a thread called "The Mamma of All BS Threads" and require that everyone post in southern US dialect? I'm 'on tell ya how ya'd feel. Ya'd feel all lef' out on accounta ain't but mebbe three er four fokes 'round these parts got enuff red in they necks t' do southern worth chicken-fried snakeshit. It's a skill ya don't learn in no damm Canada, an' talkin' like Fiona fuckin' Ritchie ain't sumthin' ya learn in Bubbaland.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Dec 09 - 04:34 PM

Damnbetcha. It's a hangin' offense, ask me.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ed T
Date: 03 Dec 09 - 04:48 PM

And .. besides, there are 33 posts in the MF'ing mither thread that could have been over here. I say lert' s smash the brothy tartan (looks like plaid to me) thread to smitherines. Woolsey-kiltie Scottie can beam ove here to post I say.

Why would anyone want to hear such celt-gaelic inspired talk as:

"Ah feel better noo ahv dun a joby (joobie)"

"aye forced oot mah joby too quack and noo its down mah leg"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ed T
Date: 03 Dec 09 - 04:58 PM

I admit, I was lured over there a couple of times....by promises of Glennie's Single malt rot gut. It was the sound of that "gad awful" pipe ting they call a musical instrument they were blow'into that cast me back here (sounds like they stepp'ed onto a cats gonads . ...That's the reason they talk the way they do....too much blow'in Scotch vapours into those pipes...there's the frontal lobe brain damage from blow back fumes, and the added pressure on the "roids that'll put a lift on the back of the kilt.


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