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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Little Hawk 10 Jun 12 - 03:50 PM
Acme 10 Jun 12 - 02:20 PM
Amos 10 Jun 12 - 01:55 PM
Little Hawk 10 Jun 12 - 12:40 PM
Rapparee 10 Jun 12 - 10:13 AM
Little Hawk 10 Jun 12 - 07:22 AM
Amos 10 Jun 12 - 12:25 AM
Rapparee 10 Jun 12 - 12:00 AM
Rapparee 09 Jun 12 - 11:13 PM
Acme 09 Jun 12 - 10:47 PM
Rapparee 09 Jun 12 - 04:00 PM
gnu 09 Jun 12 - 03:21 PM
GUEST 09 Jun 12 - 01:12 PM
Acme 09 Jun 12 - 11:09 AM
Amos 08 Jun 12 - 07:30 PM
Rapparee 08 Jun 12 - 02:36 PM
Amos 08 Jun 12 - 02:33 PM
gnu 08 Jun 12 - 01:46 PM
Rapparee 08 Jun 12 - 01:42 PM
Eiseley 08 Jun 12 - 11:36 AM
Amos 08 Jun 12 - 11:19 AM
Rapparee 08 Jun 12 - 09:55 AM
Amos 07 Jun 12 - 10:27 PM
Rapparee 07 Jun 12 - 09:03 PM
Acme 07 Jun 12 - 04:34 PM
Amos 07 Jun 12 - 04:09 PM
gnu 07 Jun 12 - 04:01 PM
Rapparee 07 Jun 12 - 03:52 PM
Little Hawk 07 Jun 12 - 02:39 PM
gnu 07 Jun 12 - 02:32 PM
Amos 07 Jun 12 - 02:22 PM
Rapparee 07 Jun 12 - 01:49 PM
Little Hawk 07 Jun 12 - 12:57 PM
Amos 07 Jun 12 - 12:33 PM
Little Hawk 07 Jun 12 - 12:19 PM
Acme 07 Jun 12 - 12:07 PM
Amos 07 Jun 12 - 10:29 AM
Rapparee 07 Jun 12 - 09:05 AM
Acme 07 Jun 12 - 01:02 AM
Little Hawk 06 Jun 12 - 09:52 PM
Rapparee 06 Jun 12 - 09:35 PM
Acme 06 Jun 12 - 09:27 PM
Acme 06 Jun 12 - 09:23 PM
Acme 06 Jun 12 - 09:23 PM
Acme 06 Jun 12 - 09:23 PM
Acme 06 Jun 12 - 09:22 PM
Acme 06 Jun 12 - 09:22 PM
Acme 06 Jun 12 - 09:21 PM
Acme 06 Jun 12 - 09:21 PM
Acme 06 Jun 12 - 09:21 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 03:50 PM

Ahhh...that's very generous and kind of you to say those things, Amos. "the coruscating brilliance of your humor and sparkling imagination" Why, I couldn't have put it better myself! I bask in your approval, good sir, like Shatner basking on a sunlit beach of peace and plenty.

And look! Stilly River Sage has been rendered altogether speechless by your spritely and timely commentary.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 02:20 PM

Little Hawk could be invisible if he decided to post in this manner, using our "invisible writing" trick.

Just a thought.

Gotta make this space long enough so he figures out to "select" the screen to see it.

:)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 01:55 PM

Aw, Hawkster, c'mon. Invisible? You're anything but!! Every major hingepoint in the development of MOAB has been lit by the coruscating brilliance of your humor and sparkling imagination. The most thoughtful posts, the most colorful inventions all suspend over the deathless signature of Little Hawk. The only way you could be more visible is to invent the holodeck!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 12:40 PM

Ever felt like "the invisible man" whilst posting on a long-running and vitally important Mudcat thread like this one? I have. That's why I descend to gratuitously insulting Rap and Amos frequently, and doing other things that annoy them or get their attention, like posting McGonagall poems in Amos's case, for instance. It helps to know what pushes their buttons if you are desirous of a response of some kind. Of course, that's true with everyone. It even works with me. ;-) I have been known to react to certain predictable stimuli from time to time.

The very worst, in this sense, are the political argument addicts. You want their attention? You want a response? Say something bad about Obama! Say something good about Obama. Say anything about Obama. Anything at all. Even if it's true! ;-) Works every time, absolutely without fail. All the usual bells will ring, all the usual political warriors will charge, raving, onto the field of battle, guns a-blazing!

Chongo dreams of being in the same dire spot that Obama is in. He can be a very foolish ape at times! I wouldn't change places with Obama for any number of dates with Winona Ryder...though...I might briefly be somewhat tempted to, I suppose. But, hey, I'm not a complete idiot.

But at age 27, I'd probably have gone for it....although Winona would have been too young then...

Okay, I mean just hypothetically. Capiche?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 10:13 AM

Yes, I used to sneak into the ballroom when my parents were having a dance and quietly scatter BBs on the floor.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 07:22 AM

For some considerable time I was under the false impression that the name of "Titleist" golfballs was pronounced as "tit-lyste". I figured it was an obscure German name which had an unfortunate sound in English.

It was years and years later that I overheard someone say it..."title-ist". What a revelation! It made sense right away.

I was immediately relieved that I hadn't embarrassed myself by pronouncing it incorrectly within hearing of those in the know...but there wasn't too much risk of my doing so, because I don't think I've ever been on a golf course...nor watched more than maybe a minute of the game on TV at any given time. It was probably someone on the TV that I heard pronouncing the brand name in the normal and correct fashion.

There probably are no Titleists in Germnay after all. The people, I mean...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 12:25 AM

Torturing balls was one of the earliest of Rapparree's many talents to develop, and has always been one of his favorite pastimes.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 12:00 AM

Oh, the bullets used were .45 caliber -- .45 Colt, to be precise.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Jun 12 - 11:13 PM

I determined that Titleist golf balls can better resist the impact of a 255 grain fully jacketed lead bullet traveling at about 850 feet per second better than Bridgestone golf balls can. I don't believe thar in their present state any of the four balls can still be used for golf.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Jun 12 - 10:47 PM

Rap, you tortured balls that wound up in your back yard?

When I started reading, I was thinking tires, for some reason. It's less of a jolt that it is golfballs.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Jun 12 - 04:00 PM

Hi, Mom. I did comparative destructive testing on Bridgestone and Titleist golf balls this morning. Titleist came out ahead.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 09 Jun 12 - 03:21 PM

That was me. Tossed my cookie.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 09 Jun 12 - 01:12 PM

"a foreign exchange student from Saudi"

I hope it's not for flight school.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Jun 12 - 11:09 AM

Interesting that you can cleave to principles but if you use a cleaver you split them asunder. So to speak.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Jun 12 - 07:30 PM

How lovely that you know that a principal may have a principle, but not the other way around.

We are being visited by a foreign exchange student from Saudi who thinks he may want to rent a room here. It will be interesting.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Jun 12 - 02:36 PM

I cleave to my principles and standards of behavior, to my honor and to my given word.

When I was in school I never wanted to cleave to my principals, because in grade school that was a nun and in high school a Christian Brother (male).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Jun 12 - 02:33 PM

Oh, forgive my hasty thumbs. I meant to write, "and you don't like cleaving much...". A clear-minded inspection will make this more than obvious, since the immediate antecedent was "I don't like brevity". Surely even Rapp can see that?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 08 Jun 12 - 01:46 PM

I believe the intention may have been... And you ain't cleaving much, either!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Jun 12 - 01:42 PM

And you don't cleaving much, either!!

I am aware of that use of the word. However, your sentence structure or grammar (as given above) is atrocious. You probably wanted to write "...don't cleave much..." or "...don't do much cleaving..." or even (and I shudder at this construction) "...don't do cleaving...." As it stands it makes no sense whether it is diagrammed or analyzed using a linguistic "treeing."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 08 Jun 12 - 11:36 AM

Yay Stilly! And what a fine poem, Amos.

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Jun 12 - 11:19 AM

No. I KNEW you were going to do that. Cleaving as in disciplined fidelity, persistence in applying a standard, sticking to something.

I know you do sometimes stick to some things--bedsheets and bedpans--but that's not the same thing.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Jun 12 - 09:55 AM

"Cleaving"??? Like this?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 10:27 PM

I know, I know. And you don't cleaving much, either!! :D


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 09:03 PM

Brevity? I don't like brevity, I like to keep it short and to the point.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 04:34 PM

Good pome, Amos!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 04:09 PM

YEah, take your time. Lesson Two will be on cleaving to brevity!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 04:01 PM

Much later, okay?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 03:52 PM

Call him irrepressible
Call him undeniable
Call him unremarkable too.
Call him unreliable
Call him indefensible
Call him unrepairable too.
Call him unprofessional
Call him inexpressible
Call him inexcusable too.
Call him quite unfashionable
Call him uninsurable
Call him undesirable too.
Call him unexceptional
Call him unsuppressable
Call him unconventional too.
Call him undecipherable
Call him unapproachable
Call him uneconomical too.

Heck, that's enough for now. I'll get back to this later.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 02:39 PM

---


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 02:32 PM

What would you do if you had $1M?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 02:22 PM

I wish I had a million bucks,
I wish I had a mansion.
But most of all, I dearly wish
That Rapparee would learn the fundamental elements of scansion.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 01:49 PM

Call him irrepressible
Call him underwearable
Throw in unDependsable, too

Do his foolish alibis bore you?
Well, he's not too clever, 'cause he
Lives in the San Diego Zoo.

       Douglas Lincoln de Bates Collected Shorts
          (Gallows Hill Park: Lynch & Stretchum, 1843)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 12:57 PM

You're irrepressible, aren't you?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 12:33 PM

The clock was running down too fast!
Oh, how our hearts did whirl.
Said I, "One trick will save our ass!
"Just hand-off to the girls!"

So on the snap I faked a throw
And whirled around to Jane,
And she lateraled to Stilly Sage
With a speed that was 'most insane!

And Stilly held that ball aloft,
And danced with grace amazing,
Her fingers flew, her windows too,
Her trail was bright, and blazing!

She danced, she leapt, she dodged, she twirled!
She posted without pausing,
The Goal Posts then were all her world,
And a ruction she was causing.

The stoppers tried to stop her, boys,
They fell right on their faces.
They goofed the fluke and fell apart,
And fainted in the traces.

And Stilly stepped across that line,
And new light filled the day,
She spiked the ball, and let out a cvall.
"There's Forty Five of Kay!!"

THe crowd went wild, they spilled their beer,
They screamed to beat the band.
And then they all went home, to wait
For the next dramatic Grand.

But Stilly says she's done her bit,
And although the thrill was nifty,
She thinks she's gonna rest a bit,
Until the Kays reach Fifty.

And as the sun goes slowly down,
And the birds sleep in the park,
The sun sets, too, on Little Hawk
WHo carps there in the dark.

Winston Merriwether Strumpet-Toes Junior
The Rising of the Kay
Poobah and Boffin, Inc.
NYC, NY, 2012


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 12:19 PM

Heh! Heh! Lovely responses indeed. Amos even called me "sirrah" again. Stilly, I can only say I admire your forbearance, holding off for a whole 5,000 posts.

I palpitate to think what will happen when post 50,000 starts approaching! As for post 100,000...well...no, it's not even worth thinking about.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 12:07 PM

I'm not a poet, in the long sense that Amos and Rap subscribe to, so I don't attempt it. I just wanted to keep some of those outlyers from pouncing on the number. I noticed Walksabout Verse hanging around the entrance to the alley, waiting the jump the line.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 10:29 AM

The idle complaints of the indolent onlooker, always ready to criticize those who do, carp about those who raise the dust, who hew the stone, who pen the verses, who reach out to capture the gigantic numbers. Piffle, sirrah!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 09:05 AM

Envy ill becomes you, LH.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Jun 12 - 01:02 AM

Pfffle. I don't post a bunch in a row for a simple 1000 posts. I do it for large substantial numbers. You can rely on me to not fuss with this kind of thing for at least another 5,000 posts.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Jun 12 - 09:52 PM

How long before this nonsense starts up again? I mean...the race to 46,000. When will Amos start composing florid rhymes heralding the approach of the great moment? When will Rapparee answer them with doggerel of his own? When will SRS post 15 or 20 times in a row as the deadline approaches?

How long have I got without having to witness that sort of thing on this thread? Hmmm? That period of 1,000 posts is starting to whiz by way too fast, if you ask me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Jun 12 - 09:35 PM

You ARE going to donate that to PETBEN, aren't you?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Jun 12 - 09:27 PM

Okay. Now I can go and eat dinner.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Jun 12 - 09:23 PM

45,000 is round. And big. And mine.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Jun 12 - 09:23 PM

Almost.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Jun 12 - 09:23 PM

Closing in.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Jun 12 - 09:22 PM

Closer.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Jun 12 - 09:22 PM

Of course a very large number is a nice target.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Jun 12 - 09:21 PM

One of them is bound to hit a big number.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Jun 12 - 09:21 PM

I hope not.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Jun 12 - 09:21 PM

Of course there could be other players out there so these little statements might end up as non sequiturs.


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