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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 01 Jun 10 - 05:07 PM
GUEST,Eiseley 01 Jun 10 - 05:04 PM
VirginiaTam 01 Jun 10 - 03:39 PM
Rapparee 01 Jun 10 - 03:07 PM
Rapparee 01 Jun 10 - 02:55 PM
Little Hawk 01 Jun 10 - 12:42 PM
Amos 01 Jun 10 - 11:28 AM
Rapparee 01 Jun 10 - 10:37 AM
Rapparee 31 May 10 - 11:44 PM
Acme 31 May 10 - 11:43 PM
Janie 31 May 10 - 11:39 PM
Acme 31 May 10 - 11:34 PM
Janie 31 May 10 - 11:33 PM
Rapparee 31 May 10 - 11:16 PM
Eiseley 31 May 10 - 09:50 PM
Rapparee 31 May 10 - 09:45 PM
Eiseley 31 May 10 - 09:33 PM
Janie 31 May 10 - 07:12 PM
Rapparee 31 May 10 - 06:57 PM
Acme 31 May 10 - 06:15 PM
gnu 31 May 10 - 06:07 PM
Janie 31 May 10 - 06:03 PM
Rapparee 31 May 10 - 10:48 AM
Amos 31 May 10 - 10:31 AM
Rapparee 31 May 10 - 09:53 AM
Acme 30 May 10 - 10:53 PM
Rapparee 30 May 10 - 10:32 PM
Amos 30 May 10 - 09:31 PM
Amos 30 May 10 - 09:17 PM
Rapparee 30 May 10 - 08:09 PM
Amos 30 May 10 - 07:34 PM
Eiseley 30 May 10 - 07:29 PM
Eiseley 30 May 10 - 07:29 PM
Rapparee 30 May 10 - 07:26 PM
Rapparee 30 May 10 - 07:25 PM
Rapparee 30 May 10 - 06:36 PM
Eiseley 30 May 10 - 05:48 PM
Amos 30 May 10 - 05:13 PM
Rapparee 30 May 10 - 03:02 PM
Amos 30 May 10 - 01:40 PM
Amos 30 May 10 - 12:35 PM
Acme 30 May 10 - 11:58 AM
Amos 30 May 10 - 09:24 AM
Rapparee 30 May 10 - 08:56 AM
Eiseley 29 May 10 - 08:54 PM
Amos 29 May 10 - 07:41 PM
Amos 29 May 10 - 07:32 PM
Little Hawk 29 May 10 - 05:22 PM
gnu 29 May 10 - 03:46 PM
Rapparee 29 May 10 - 03:37 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Jun 10 - 05:07 PM

VT, you need to know and heed the Guiding Principle of MOAB. I don't have the energy right now to post it, but I'm certain Amos will enlighten you. Welcome, by the way, to Mom's place, where every one is above average except for those who are a wee bit below.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Eiseley
Date: 01 Jun 10 - 05:04 PM

So if we have something that needs to have a fuss made about it, are you the man to call? What are your rates? Do you work by the hour or by the job?

VirginiaTam, I recently posted a section from George MacDonald's Light Princess for Amos and Rapaire. Here is what he had to say about the princess and a sore toe:

""The only revenge the princess took upon her aunt, was to tread pretty hard on her gouty toe, the next time she saw her. But she was sorry for it the very next day, when she heard that the water had undermined her house, and that it had fallen in the night, burying her in its ruins; whence no one ever ventured to dig up her body. There she lies to this day."

May your house stay perfectly sound and your toe heal soon.

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 01 Jun 10 - 03:39 PM

not that anything much can trump Rap's last post, but there is this.

Not brilliant but I had to say it somewhere.

on reading Goethe and having a pain in my toe

It never ceases to astonish me that the body, as a whole, can and will sympathise with a pain in such an insignificant part as a toe.   Undoubtedly, the body will attempt to compensate, even to a ridiculous degree, in favour of the silly digit.

And this! That the mind understands why, yet will not resign itself to the phenomenon. So that, therefore, the mind must be perplexed at the body's obstinate catering to an offended micro-part, the body overtaxes itself to protect that part.

The mind, invariably attempts to will the body to the contrary, rationalizing that only more of its parts will become injured in this ludicrous pursuit of the toe's comfort. Hence, the entire organism is at odds with itself, each part now rebelling either for or against another so that the whole system becomes dysfunctional.



"all that is transitory is but a metaphor" my big toe…..


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Jun 10 - 03:07 PM

Fussmonger


Extraordinary



Mr. Rapaire is
pleased to announce
that he has taken up
the trade of
Fussmonger
Extraordinary and
hopes that all will
favor him with their
custom at his shop in


MOAB Street.



(Peacemongering also provided at slightly
higher rates.)





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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Jun 10 - 02:55 PM

YOUR ATTENTION, PLEASE!!

Rapaire coming out of retirement. A announcement will be forthcoming.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 01 Jun 10 - 12:42 PM

She's depressed because no one has posted anything absolutely brilliant here lately.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Jun 10 - 11:28 AM

Nah, she was just sleeping in to avoid having to face all the whinging. SHe don't buy off t6hat easy, Man O' Booques!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Jun 10 - 10:37 AM

Poor Mom. No one else to say, "Good Morning!" and greet her with a smiling face, a nice pot of tea, some fresh scones, and a reminder that his allowance is overdue.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 May 10 - 11:44 PM

Besides, the school kids have the public libraries -- THEY always have lots and lots of money because politicians KNOW their value to a community.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 31 May 10 - 11:43 PM

Oops. Posted this on the wrong thread, so I'll put it here, also:

The salmon was excellent, but was only a little over a pound for the three of us. I bought it for dinner yesterday with 2 in mind. I know, some people don't eat that much in a week, but we're spoiled. Anyway, I found an extra little New York strip steak in the freezer and put that on the grill also. My son really liked this salmon, so since it was kind of a celebratory dinner also I let him have a big chunk of my fish and I ate the steak. I'll go get more salmon tomorrow--it was excellent, some Columbia River salmon at 1/3 to 1/2 have the price of the Alaska fish and it's the same blankety blank varieties. :) It's all in a name: Copper River or Columbia River. Roll On Columbia, and give me some good fish. If it was good enough for Lewis and Clark (well, it wasn't really, because they preferred to buy Indian dogs and eat them) it's good enough for us!

The corn was great, that Olathe variety (or a good knockoff) and the Italian bread was warm and melted butter quickly. Watermelon to top it off. Mmmmm!

MOM, no one wants to play spin the bottle. Here, let me put that in the recycle bin. That German beer was good with the fish and corn, wasn't it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 31 May 10 - 11:39 PM

I knew I had a good reason for discouraging Sum Yung Sun from reading MOAB!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 31 May 10 - 11:34 PM

And video games. They need to spend hours on games, not reading.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 31 May 10 - 11:33 PM

Exactly, Eiseley. Pure chance. When I consider how very close a call it was, and all the chance variables involving not just me, but probably 15-30 other vehicles and drivers....actually, it is best that I not spend much time considering it... possessing, as I do, at least an average need to maintain an illusion of self-control over my destiny. *grin*

Definitely gonna be a bit hypervigilant while riding in or driving a vehicle for the next several days.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 May 10 - 11:16 PM

Kids don't need books, they need more football.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 31 May 10 - 09:50 PM

It was a white Ford pickup---with only a dog, no load, in the back. I figure it was an anomaly. I wanted to pull over and catch my breath, but I was on my way to the school district office where my narrow escape served to make my plea that they fund school librarians' positions quite eloquent but ultimately futile because they're cutting even more. But that's another story.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 May 10 - 09:45 PM

Do you know anything about the truck? At a minimum you could report it to the police, as all trucks are supposed to have covered loads (city ordinance as well as Federal law).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 31 May 10 - 09:33 PM

Oh Janie! Has your heart calmed down even now? I'm so glad you're all right!

The other day I was driving on the North Main extension and a truck changed lanes from where it was behind me, sped up and passed. As it did, a chunk of metal came whizzing from the truck bed and smashed into the metal frame around my windshield, denting it pretty badly. The driver of the truck was oblivious to it all. I was so thankful it hit exactly there and then and not one split second earlier (or it would have smacked into the window and broken it) or a split second later (or it would have zoomed into my open side window and done me in). So here's to narrow escapes!

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 31 May 10 - 07:12 PM

No hero, Stilly. Just lucky as hell.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 May 10 - 06:57 PM

Janie, try to avoid that sort of thing in the future.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 31 May 10 - 06:15 PM

Whoa, Janie! A hero in our midst and just in time for Memorial Day. Fortunate that none of them will remember this day for having lost someone. (Saturday was the anniversary of my Mother's death, in 1998. And Dad died on Veteran's Day. Ironically, both of them were vets.)

Been working on the house and gardening. Got an extra weekend day this week for puttering, but now I'm fixing dinner. One of you guys want to fill the cooler with ice and stick the beer in? It's salmon, steaks (cause there isn't quite enough salmon for all of us), corn on the cob, Italian bread, and watermelon. Not quite a Martha Stewart spread, but it'll taste good.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 31 May 10 - 06:07 PM

Jjanie... my day was not quite as exciting... thank goodness!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 31 May 10 - 06:03 PM

HI MOM,

You ain't dead yet, or we woulda put posies on your grave too.


Speaking of dead, glad I am that neither my Subaru or I are. When I saw that big Chevy SUV 4 car lengths ahead and three lanes to the right suddenly take a hard left and start heading in the wrong direction, directly in my lane, I had time to think that with both of us going 65 it was not going to be pretty. When the car two lanes to the right swerved to miss him, she hit the car one lane to the right, which got knocked all the way to the left berm, hitting the chevy, now going in the opposite direction in my lane, and also knocked the Chevy to the left berm, thus clearing him out of my lane, and I squeaked through, missing impact by about 6 inches and a split second, and able to steer over to the berm and out of the way before I got rear-ended. Not sure whose bumper it was, but it flew over my car and landed safely out of traffic.

The mostly badly damaged vehicle had come to a stop immediately opposite me on the right berm. Smoke was pouring from the car, and the young girl behind the wheel was just sitting there, conscious, but looking dazed.   I ran across the freeway before traffic started moving through again to check on her. (I have no idea how well I would have remembered any of my first responder training - boy, I'm glad it wasn't needed.)

By the time the police were there and were finished taking statements, traffic was moving again in all 4 lanes, and there I was, on the opposite side of the highway from my car. It felt quite grand to have the nice policeman stop all 4 lanes of traffic again, just so little ol' me could get back across the road.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 May 10 - 10:48 AM

It makes plants grow and flowers bloom, it's been used for years as everything from a snakebite cure to a facial beauty mask. Why wouldn't it work for Mom's kids?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 May 10 - 10:31 AM

The men of MOM are strong and proud
The women smart, good-looking
And always stand out in a crowd
With their beauty and home cooking.
The children all are four point oh,
And cute as bunny blessings,
And none of Mom's collective clan
Has a sin that's worth confessing.
They all are bright and do what's right,
PLain spoken, never stealthy.
And the reason this is true is that
BSing keeps them healthy!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 May 10 - 09:53 AM

Alas, poor Mom, they do you wrong
To abandon you so precipitously....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 May 10 - 10:53 PM

Eiseley, don't leave too many of those snickers around, please. I think I'm allergic to chocolate.

Oh, wait, the stuff they use in those bars to pass for chocolate is mostly emulsifier. Never mind.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 10 - 10:32 PM

I like the RFCs back then. I'll post some I have one of these days.

No, Amos, I could never be a cracker. I was born and raised in Illinois, the Sucker State.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 10 - 09:31 PM

Network Working Group                                  R. Callon, Editor
Request for Comments: 1925                                          IOOF
Category: Informational                                     1 April 1996


                      The Twelve Networking Truths

Status of this Memo

   This memo provides information for the Internet community. This memo
   does not specify an Internet standard of any kind. Distribution of
   this memo is unlimited.

Abstract

   This memo documents the fundamental truths of networking for the
   Internet community. This memo does not specify a standard, except in
   the sense that all standards must implicitly follow the fundamental
   truths.

Acknowledgements

   The truths described in this memo result from extensive study over an
   extended period of time by many people, some of whom did not intend
   to contribute to this work. The editor merely has collected these
   truths, and would like to thank the networking community for
   originally illuminating these truths.

1. Introduction

   This Request for Comments (RFC) provides information about the
   fundamental truths underlying all networking. These truths apply to
   networking in general, and are not limited to TCP/IP, the Internet,
   or any other subset of the networking community.

2. The Fundamental Truths

   (1) It Has To Work.

   (2) No matter how hard you push and no matter what the priority,
       you can't increase the speed of light.

       (2a) (corollary). No matter how hard you try, you can't make a
             baby in much less than 9 months. Trying to speed this up
             *might* make it slower, but it won't make it happen any
             quicker.



   (3) With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine. However, this is
       not necessarily a good idea. It is hard to be sure where they
       are going to land, and it could be dangerous sitting under them
       as they fly overhead.

   (4) Some things in life can never be fully appreciated nor
       understood unless experienced firsthand. Some things in
       networking can never be fully understood by someone who neither
       builds commercial networking equipment nor runs an operational
       network.

   (5) It is always possible to aglutenate multiple separate problems
       into a single complex interdependent solution. In most cases
       this is a bad idea.

   (6) It is easier to move a problem around (for example, by moving
       the problem to a different part of the overall network
       architecture) than it is to solve it.

       (6a) (corollary). It is always possible to add another level of
             indirection.

   (7) It is always something

       (7a) (corollary). Good, Fast, Cheap: Pick any two (you can't
            have all three).

   (8) It is more complicated than you think.

   (9) For all resources, whatever it is, you need more.

       (9a) (corollary) Every networking problem always takes longer to
            solve than it seems like it should.

   (10) One size never fits all.

   (11) Every old idea will be proposed again with a different name and
       a different presentation, regardless of whether it works.

       (11a) (corollary). See rule 6a.

   (12) In protocol design, perfection has been reached not when there
       is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take
       away.


Security Considerations

   This RFC raises no security issues. However, security protocols are
   subject to the fundamental networking truths.

References

   The references have been deleted in order to protect the guilty and
   avoid enriching the lawyers.

Author's Address

   Ross Callon
   Internet Order of Old Farts
   c/o Bay Networks


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 10 - 09:17 PM

A subsaltine???? What, you couldn't pass the exam to be a cracker?



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 10 - 08:09 PM

Of course I did. I have been "below the salt" all of my life. I was raised below the salt, I grew up there, I have no doubt that I will be buried there (hopefully I will be dead if that happens). I am a life-long subsaltine. In fact, I think I'll change my MC name to "Subsaltine" and see if anyone notices.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 10 - 07:34 PM

Eiseley has now done something fine,
Has seized the thirty-five and nine!
God bless her! then, we all do say
For moving Mom toward the next of Kay.


Rapaire:

You didn't have to speculate, because I told you. But when you DID speculate you speculated below the salt.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 30 May 10 - 07:29 PM

snicker


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 30 May 10 - 07:29 PM

Please?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 10 - 07:26 PM

But no, not even he would stoop so low...and I certainly wouldn't. Let someone like Eiseley have it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 10 - 07:25 PM

If I don't take it Amos will.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 10 - 06:36 PM

Amos, I said that I wasn't going to speculate upon what you meant by "finished a Chapter." Perhaps you meant that you sneezed on your keyboard because of Spring pollen, the last sneeze before you new allergy medicine takes effect. Perhaps you meant that you have entered menopause and are starting a "new Chapter" of your life. Perhaps you have ceased your flirtation with Apple and are ready to move to some flavor of Linux, a real operating system. It would be foolish for me to theorize without sufficient data, as my old teacher Sherringford "Sherlock" Holmes taught me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 30 May 10 - 05:48 PM

This is what George MacDonald had to say on the subject of light (from The Light Princess)

"It is a good thing to be light-hearted, I am sure, . . . ."

"It is a bad thing to be light-headed," answered the queen, looking
with prophetic soul far into the future.

"'Tis a good thing to be light-handed," said the king.

"'Tis a bad thing to be light-fingered," answered the queen.

"'Tis a good thing to be light-footed," said the
king.

"'Tis a bad thing--" began the queen; but the king interrupted her.

"In fact," said he, with the tone of one who concludes an argument
in which he has had only imaginary opponents, and in which,
therefore, he has come off triumphant--"in fact, it is a good thing
altogether to be light-bodied."

"But it is a bad thing altogether to be light- minded," retorted
the queen, who was beginning to lose her temper.

This last answer quite discomfited his Majesty, who turned on his
heel, and betook himself to his counting-house again. But he was
not half-way towards it, when the voice of his queen overtook him.

"And it's a bad thing to be light-haired," screamed she, determined
to have more last words, now that her spirit was roused.

The queen's hair was black as night; and the king's had been, and
his daughter's was, golden as morning. But it was not this
reflection on his hair that arrested him; it was the double use of
the word light. For the king hated all witticisms, and punning
especially. And besides, he could not tell whether the queen meant
light-haired or light-heired; for why might she not aspirate her
vowels when she was exasperated herself?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 10 - 05:13 PM

Dear Rapaire:

You sound more and more like a Republican every day! Such lurid, uninvited imaginings on your part do not speak well of the chronic bent of your mental landscape, so to speak. I cleaned the keyboard because th emany months of clicking, writing and other kinds of keyboard stuff have rendered it all grimy with fingerprints. By "finished a Chapter" I simply meant I had completed adding a new chapter to my endless novel. See? Life is a lot less dirty than you seem to see it. La vie en sperme leaves much to be desired...

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 10 - 03:02 PM

Amos, I will not speculate what you mean by "finished a Chapter", which required you to disinfect your keyboard. It does, however, sound disgusting and quite improper. If you must engage in such behavior please keep it to yourself and be sure to wash you hands as well as your keyboard afterwards!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 10 - 01:40 PM

Mom, I finished a Chapter!! And then I cleaned my keyboard with Qtips and alcohol and a vacuum.

Life is goot, ya?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 10 - 12:35 PM

YEah, but lamps are lumpy. These ceiling lights look cools nestled into the overhead and shine softly down on same really lovely ancient mineral samples we have on the mantle piece. Which in turn is a lovely piece of oiled jojoba wood, tight grained and sweet.

Besides, the extensions cords for those lamps would look silly.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 May 10 - 11:58 AM

Note to Amos: lamps are easier. You can get the cutest little uplights that only require proper placement and then plugging them in. Maybe in your next house. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 10 - 09:24 AM

I see Raspaire has gone over to the dark side. No surprises there, he;s secretly been a Republican for several years.

If light gets sucked up by dark why does it run away when the light turns on?   Shadows vanish before Apollo, the Sun. Explain it, oh Manne of Darqunesse,

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 10 - 08:56 AM

"Light is good."

If light is good, what about "light headed" and "light fingered"? If light is good, why do parents yell, "Turn off the light and go to sleep!"?

DARK is good. It's the absence of light. Light sucks up dark, showing conclusively that light is for suckers.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 29 May 10 - 08:54 PM

Light is good. Way to go, Amos!

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 May 10 - 07:41 PM

It's been a long a tiring day, Momn, but productive. My neighbor came over and between us we managed to cut three holes in the living room ceiling, fish a 14-gauge switch strand down through several layers of structural blocks to a switch box, expand the box cutout and replace yhe box with a two-gang, run fifty feet of fourteen-gauge through the crawlspace, make a new junctionbox half-way down the crawlspace over head, mount three ceiling lights in the three holes and wire them up. The job included cutting an access panel in the roof of one closet, and then replacing the removed drywall and mudding same. An exhausting piece of work. But we now have three cieling lights on a dimmer switch which add a very noice light over the fireplace, yayyyy us!

Tomorrow I shall hie me to yon Balboa of Parkes to play music on the greensward.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 May 10 - 07:32 PM

Well, it's just there's not much I don't know about pontification, ya see. Simple, after all...not me, the question.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 May 10 - 05:22 PM

I don't think I've heard anything else that can match "dual-layer hypersignification". ;-) Amos should get a job writing top level corporate memos with that sort of talent.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 29 May 10 - 03:46 PM

Amos... "That's how the really first-class pontificators operate--on-the-fly postulation, real-time redundancy and dual-layer hypersignification carefully trained to function together in a seamless application."

Round here that's a "slick talker". Ye fellers out there in Calleeforneeahh sure do talk large and slow.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 May 10 - 03:37 PM

Or both.


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