Lyrics & Knowledge Personal Pages Record Shop Auction Links Radio & Media Kids Membership Help
The Mudcat Cafeetta

Post to this Thread - Printer Friendly - Home
Page: [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15] [16] [17] [18] [19] [20] [21] [22] [23] [24] [25] [26] [27] [28] [29] [30] [31] [32] [33] [34] [35] [36] [37] [38] [39] [40] [41] [42] [43] [44] [45] [46] [47] [48] [49] [50] [51] [52] [53] [54] [55] [56] [57] [58] [59] [60] [61] [62] [63] [64] [65] [66] [67] [68] [69] [70] [71] [72] [73] [74] [75] [76] [77] [78] [79] [80] [81] [82] [83] [84] [85] [86] [87] [88] [89] [90] [91] [92] [93] [94] [95] [96] [97] [98] [99] [100] [101] [102] [103] [104] [105] [106] [107] [108] [109] [110] [111] [112] [113] [114] [115] [116] [117] [118] [119] [120] [121] [122] [123] [124] [125] [126] [127] [128] [129] [130] [131] [132] [133] [134] [135] [136] [137] [138] [139] [140] [141] [142] [143] [144] [145] [146] [147] [148] [149] [150] [151] [152] [153] [154] [155] [156] [157] [158] [159] [160] [161] [162] [163] [164] [165] [166] [167] [168] [169] [170] [171] [172] [173] [174] [175] [176] [177] [178] [179] [180] [181] [182] [183] [184] [185] [186] [187] [188] [189] [190] [191] [192] [193] [194] [195] [196] [197] [198] [199] [200] [201] [202] [203] [204] [205] [206] [207] [208] [209] [210] [211] [212] [213] [214] [215] [216] [217] [218] [219] [220] [221] [222] [223] [224] [225] [226] [227] [228] [229] [230] [231] [232] [233] [234] [235] [236] [237] [238] [239] [240] [241] [242] [243] [244] [245] [246] [247] [248] [249] [250] [251] [252] [253] [254] [255] [256] [257] [258] [259] [260] [261] [262] [263] [264] [265] [266] [267] [268] [269] [270] [271] [272] [273] [274] [275] [276] [277] [278] [279] [280] [281] [282] [283] [284] [285] [286] [287] [288] [289] [290] [291] [292] [293] [294] [295] [296] [297] [298] [299] [300] [301] [302] [303] [304] [305] [306] [307] [308] [309] [310] [311] [312] [313] [314] [315] [316] [317] [318] [319] [320] [321] [322] [323] [324] [325] [326] [327] [328] [329] [330] [331] [332] [333] [334] [335] [336] [337] [338] [339] [340] [341] [342] [343] [344] [345] [346] [347] [348] [349] [350] [351] [352] [353] [354] [355] [356] [357] [358] [359] [360] [361] [362] [363] [364] [365] [366] [367] [368] [369] [370] [371] [372] [373] [374] [375] [376] [377] [378] [379] [380] [381] [382] [383] [384] [385] [386] [387] [388] [389] [390] [391] [392] [393] [394] [395] [396] [397] [398] [399] [400] [401] [402] [403] [404] [405] [406] [407] [408] [409] [410] [411] [412] [413] [414] [415] [416] [417] [418] [419] [420] [421] [422] [423] [424] [425] [426] [427] [428] [429] [430] [431] [432] [433] [434] [435] [436] [437] [438] [439] [440] [441] [442] [443] [444] [445] [446] [447] [448] [449] [450] [451] [452] [453] [454] [455] [456] [457] [458] [459] [460] [461] [462] [463] [464] [465] [466] [467] [468] [469] [470] [471] [472] [473] [474] [475] [476] [477] [478] [479] [480] [481] [482] [483] [484] [485] [486] [487] [488] [489] [490] [491] [492] [493] [494] [495] [496] [497] [498] [499] [500] [501] [502] [503] [504] [505] [506] [507] [508] [509] [510] [511] [512] [513] [514] [515] [516] [517] [518] [519] [520] [521] [522] [523] [524] [525] [526] [527] [528] [529] [530] [531] [532] [533] [534] [535] [536] [537] [538] [539] [540] [541] [542] [543] [544] [545] [546] [547] [548] [549] [550] [551] [552] [553] [554] [555] [556] [557] [558] [559] [560] [561] [562] [563] [564] [565] [566] [567] [568] [569] [570] [571] [572] [573] [574] [575] [576] [577] [578] [579] [580] [581] [582] [583] [584] [585] [586] [587] [588] [589] [590] [591] [592] [593] [594] [595] [596] [597] [598] [599] [600] [601] [602] [603] [604] [605] [606] [607] [608] [609] [610] [611] [612] [613] [614] [615] [616] [617] [618] [619] [620] [621] [622] [623] [624] [625] [626] [627] [628] [629] [630] [631] [632] [633] [634] [635] [636] [637] [638] [639] [640] [641] [642] [643] [644] [645] [646] [647] [648] [649] [650] [651] [652] [653] [654] [655] [656] [657] [658] [659] [660] [661] [662] [663] [664] [665] [666] [667] [668] [669] [670] [671] [672] [673] [674] [675] [676] [677] [678] [679] [680] [681] [682] [683] [684] [685] [686] [687] [688] [689] [690] [691] [692] [693] [694] [695] [696] [697] [698] [699] [700] [701] [702] [703] [704] [705] [706] [707] [708] [709] [710] [711] [712] [713] [714] [715] [716] [717] [718] [719] [720] [721] [722] [723] [724] [725] [726] [727] [728] [729] [730] [731] [732] [733] [734] [735] [736] [737] [738] [739] [740] [741] [742] [743] [744] [745] [746] [747] [748] [749] [750] [751] [752] [753] [754] [755] [756] [757] [758] [759] [760] [761] [762] [763] [764] [765] [766] [767] [768] [769] [770] [771] [772] [773] [774] [775] [776] [777] [778] [779] [780] [781] [782] [783] [784] [785] [786] [787] [788] [789] [790] [791] [792] [793] [794] [795] [796] [797] [798] [799] [800] [801] [802] [803] [804] [805] [806] [807] [808] [809] [810] [811] [812] [813] [814] [815] [816] [817] [818] [819] [820] [821] [822] [823] [824] [825] [826] [827] [828] [829] [830] [831] [832] [833] [834] [835] [836] [837] [838] [839] [840] [841] [842] [843] [844] [845] [846] [847] [848] [849] [850] [851] [852] [853] [854] [855] [856] [857] [858] [859] [860] [861] [862] [863] [864] [865] [866] [867] [868] [869] [870] [871] [872] [873] [874] [875] [876] [877] [878] [879] [880] [881] [882] [883] [884] [885] [886] [887] [888] [889] [890] [891] [892] [893] [894] [895] [896] [897] [898] [899] [900] [901] [902] [903] [904] [905] [906] [907] [908] [909] [910] [911] [912] [913] [914] [915] [916] [917] [918] [919] [920] [921] [922] [923] [924] [925] [926] [927] [928] [929] [930] [931] [932] [933] [934] [935] [936] [937] [938] [939] [940] [941] [942] [943] [944] [945] [946] [947] [948] [949] [950] [951] [952] [953] [954] [955] [956] [957] [958] [959] [960] [961] [962] [963] [964] [965] [966] [967] [968] [969] [970] [971] [972] [973] [974] [975] [976] [977] [978] [979] [980] [981] [982] [983] [984] [985] [986] [987] [988] [989] [990] [991] [992] [993] [994] [995] [996] [997] [998] [999] [1000] [1001] [1002] [1003] [1004] [1005] [1006] [1007] [1008] [1009] [1010] [1011] [1012] [1013] [1014] [1015] [1016] [1017] [1018] [1019] [1020] [1021] [1022] [1023] [1024] [1025] [1026] [1027] [1028] [1029] [1030] [1031] [1032] [1033] [1034] [1035] [1036] [1037] [1038] [1039] [1040] [1041] [1042] [1043] [1044] [1045] [1046] [1047] [1048] [1049] [1050] [1051] [1052] [1053] [1054] [1055] [1056] [1057] [1058] [1059] [1060] [1061] [1062] [1063] [1064] [1065] [1066] [1067] [1068] [1069] [1070] [1071] [1072] [1073] [1074] [1075] [1076] [1077] [1078] [1079] [1080] [1081] [1082] [1083] [1084] [1085] [1086] [1087] [1088] [1089] [1090] [1091] [1092] [1093] [1094] [1095] [1096] [1097] [1098] [1099] [1100] [1101] [1102] [1103] [1104] [1105] [1106] [1107] [1108] [1109] [1110] [1111] [1112] [1113] [1114] [1115] [1116] [1117] [1118] [1119] [1120] [1121] [1122] [1123] [1124] [1125] [1126] [1127] [1128] [1129] [1130]


BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Acme 28 Jan 10 - 02:21 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 28 Jan 10 - 02:17 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 28 Jan 10 - 02:16 PM
MMario 28 Jan 10 - 01:48 PM
Little Hawk 28 Jan 10 - 01:42 PM
mousethief 28 Jan 10 - 01:25 PM
Acme 28 Jan 10 - 12:05 PM
Rapparee 28 Jan 10 - 09:43 AM
Little Hawk 28 Jan 10 - 07:17 AM
Amos 27 Jan 10 - 11:19 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 27 Jan 10 - 11:18 PM
Little Hawk 27 Jan 10 - 10:24 PM
Amos 27 Jan 10 - 10:14 PM
Amos 27 Jan 10 - 10:09 PM
Amos 27 Jan 10 - 10:07 PM
Little Hawk 27 Jan 10 - 09:58 PM
mousethief 27 Jan 10 - 09:48 PM
Little Hawk 27 Jan 10 - 09:42 PM
Rapparee 27 Jan 10 - 09:05 PM
Amos 27 Jan 10 - 07:35 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 27 Jan 10 - 06:35 PM
Little Hawk 27 Jan 10 - 04:30 PM
Amos 27 Jan 10 - 04:13 PM
Acme 27 Jan 10 - 03:49 PM
Little Hawk 27 Jan 10 - 03:44 PM
Rapparee 27 Jan 10 - 03:38 PM
Amos 27 Jan 10 - 03:28 PM
MMario 27 Jan 10 - 03:10 PM
Rapparee 27 Jan 10 - 03:06 PM
Little Hawk 27 Jan 10 - 02:48 PM
MMario 27 Jan 10 - 02:38 PM
Rapparee 27 Jan 10 - 02:18 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 27 Jan 10 - 01:45 PM
Amos 27 Jan 10 - 12:28 PM
Little Hawk 27 Jan 10 - 11:53 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 27 Jan 10 - 11:49 AM
Amos 27 Jan 10 - 11:19 AM
Little Hawk 27 Jan 10 - 11:11 AM
Rapparee 27 Jan 10 - 11:09 AM
Acme 27 Jan 10 - 10:16 AM
Amos 27 Jan 10 - 09:59 AM
Rapparee 27 Jan 10 - 09:02 AM
Little Hawk 26 Jan 10 - 09:43 PM
Rapparee 26 Jan 10 - 08:05 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 26 Jan 10 - 07:19 PM
Rapparee 26 Jan 10 - 06:38 PM
MMario 26 Jan 10 - 06:36 PM
Little Hawk 26 Jan 10 - 06:23 PM
Amos 26 Jan 10 - 05:15 PM
Rapparee 26 Jan 10 - 03:33 PM
Lyrics & Knowledge Search [Advanced]
DT  Forum
Sort (Forum) by:relevance date
DT Lyrics:






Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 28 Jan 10 - 02:21 PM

Is he the guy who came into the yard several years ago after his two dogs? That was the funniest story I've read anywhere in a long time. I kinda hate to lose someone who has such potential for generating hilarity through obtuse behavior.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 28 Jan 10 - 02:17 PM

By the way, Little Hawk, you sure do make a lot of noise for a dead guy.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 28 Jan 10 - 02:16 PM

Hi, Mom!

I've created at new fictional character. His name is Louie Frint. He is a redneck. Yeah, I know "redneck" is an insult, but it's a lot easier to say than "Goddamned bigotted asshole motherfucker". Louie is not a very nice person. He hates blacks, gays, Latinos, Muslims, women and liberals. He also hates atheists even though he himself has not seen the inside of a church since his mom's funeral twenty-seven years ago. He has a "right to life" bumper sticker on his pickup truck's bumper but, in his case, it actually means "right to father illegitimate children without assuming any sort of responsibility". He has fourteen semi-automatic rifles and a footlocker full of ammunition. He drinks beer while driving and throws the empties out the window onto the roadside. He has sixteen large dogs of undetermined breed chained at various places around the front yard of his mobole home. Their principle function seems to be to prevent anyone from attempting to steal any of old cars and trucks which are resting on concrete blocks in that same yard. He has a methamphetamine lab in the woods near his home. He is, in short, a thoroughly useless and disreputable character.

Somebody please kill him.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 28 Jan 10 - 01:48 PM

MT- don't try to inject logic into a conversation with LH....it doesn't work.

Of course, interjecting illogic into a conversation with LH doesn't usually lead anywhere either.

LH is much like a conversational black hole, everything gets pulled into orbit around him and warped by his conversational inertia and mass.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 28 Jan 10 - 01:42 PM

True, but where do you get this thing about people who "hike 100 miles into the desert then shoot their left foot off". I doubt you can document even a single case of anyone who's done that.

Besides, it would probably lead directly to death, right? Which returns us to the original theory that death is great, and that's why they wouldn't come back! ;-)


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: mousethief
Date: 28 Jan 10 - 01:25 PM

No dead people have ever come back and complained about it, have they? That tells you something. People come back and complain about Mexico...or WalMart...or a movie they wasted 10 bucks on. But they don't come back and complain about death.

On the other hand, they complain about life constantly. See my point?


People who hike 100 miles into the desert then shoot their left foot off rarely come back and complain either. This doesn't make me feel like following suit. Merely lacking complainers doesn't necessarily recommend a condition all that much.

O..O
=o=


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 28 Jan 10 - 12:05 PM

They are to be congratulated that the elephant didn't decide to start rolling around with the dog and the orang. Things might have turned out a lot differently.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Jan 10 - 09:43 AM

Man, don't those cats EVER dust their elephants??? And it must suck to be that poor dog.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 28 Jan 10 - 07:17 AM

My point exactly. A body just greatly limits the possibilities of freedom of movement, after all, and imposes further limitations such as aging, illness, and myriad forms of suffering. That's the "glass is half empty" view, of course. Clearly, bodies also allow many pleasant experiences of a bodily type as well, and that's probably one of a number of motivations behind seeking another term in bodily existence.

But is the afterlife boring???? I hardly think so! It would be boring if it were like the traditional Christian notions of a fairy tale heaven where the "saved" sit around on clouds playing harps...but that's just downright silly. What is boring about having complete freedom of movement to anywhere you want to go and a vast number of other souls to communicate with about everything you can possibly imagine? What is boring about being able to manifest pure thought into visible reality? What is boring about learning new things and grasping new concepts?

Boring???? You have no idea.

"Dead" is an expression we use to describe a body that has been vacated by the living intelligence that once moved it around and gave it expression and made it function biologically. The expression only describes the body, it does not describe the intelligence. A living intelligence, in my opinion, cannot die, because it's pure energy, and energy doesn't die, it simply moves around from one place to another, sometimes taking up residence in one form or another.

The electricity and radio waves (energy) that make your radio or TV appear to "live" do not die when you unplug the physical device. They continue existing, but you don't notice them anymore, because the only way you CAN notice them when you're in a body is by noticing them through the physical device that is broadcasting them to you. The radio or TV "dies" when you unplug it or put an ax through it. The living energy that allows it to broadcast sound and light to you does not.

When my body dies, you won't hear me anymore or see me anymore. That doesn't mean I've ceased to exist, it just means I'm not manifesting any longer in a way that you can pick up with your physical senses.

The above is for Bee-Dub. ;-) Amos already knows all this stuff, right, Amos?

Bee-Dub, about the electric guitar: I've had that experience too...but I suspect it's because you and I simply never mastered electric guitar technique that we find they rapidly become "boring" after the initial thrill of newness. If you play on an electric as you would on an acoustic, it just doesn't sound that good. I never figured out how to play properly on electric guitars, so for me they are virtually useless, but I've seen people who can do wonders with them.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 11:19 PM

Well of course!! But they don't hang around being dead. Ones I've met fell alive to the nth degree!! There's no law says you have to have a body to be alive, after all.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 11:18 PM

Actually, the only problem I have with being dead is that it might be one of those things that starts out awesomely but turns boring pretty quickly. Sort of like an electric guitar....


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 10:24 PM

Oh, that is so cute! (the hound dog and the Orangutan) What a heartwarming tale.

I'm not convinced, Amos, that some don't hang around for awhile "out there" in the whatever-it-is between embodied lives. I think it might be optional. I certainly hope so.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 10:14 PM

That's because they usually don't spend much time there, Hawkster. They're so busy being a live they hardly notice the brief frrrrripppppppp! of passing through the screen from one scene to the next.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 10:09 PM

Let's try that agin: Here's how it turned out...


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 10:07 PM

LET THERE BE LIFE!!! The DEAD are REBORN.

In secret intell reports from HumInt resources in the back country of Thailand a mysterious tale begins to unfold. It seems a badly shaken up chimp from Chicago got a bad case of shell-shock after nearly being blown up by an IED in the Afgan desert, and took off high-tailing it in any direction he could go until he came to the kinder and gentler fields of the upper Mekong region.

There he laid low, recovering his wits for several months, and finally found himself a passable disguise and cadged himself a comfy position as a House Orangutang. He began reflecting on how bad he'd been in the life he left behind,.

Full of remorse, he was beginning to seek some sort of path toward spiritual redemption when he ra across the reincarnated spirit of one of the East Side Chicago gorillas he had double-crossed back in his bad identity, in a new and different life-form. A perfect opportunity to make amends and demonstrate reform!!!

>Here's how it turned out.....


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 09:58 PM

Being dead has simply been given a bad name by the people who haven't tried it yet...or who have forgotten the last time they tried it.

No dead people have ever come back and complained about it, have they? That tells you something. People come back and complain about Mexico...or WalMart...or a movie they wasted 10 bucks on. But they don't come back and complain about death.

On the other hand, they complain about life constantly. See my point?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: mousethief
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 09:48 PM

I know I'm late to the table here, but can I be not dead too? The very thought of being dead makes me feel ... in fear for my life. And that just doesn't set right.

Thanks y'all so much.

O..O
=o=


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 09:42 PM

What exactly do you mean by "her current husband"? She has only ever been married once.

Now you two just behave like nice little dead people should and be quiet for awhile.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 09:05 PM

Penelope Rutledge is transgendered. The operation was done in 1987 in the Netherlands by a back-alley surgeon named Nils. Her current husband found out on their wedding night.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 07:35 PM

Nah, see, LH, that isn't gonna work, and besides, it's a cheap shot, eh?   You can't "dead" those of us who keep this thread alive. We wouldn't stand for it!! Besides, even if we did just to humor your sorry ass, we would be honor bound to come back and HANT you. And believe me, you do not want that. If you think being pestered by Chinga was bad, imagine a situation where imaginary characters just kept popping up and twisting your universe around willy nilly, over and over again....well, on second thought maybe you have an inkling, but this time it would be MY imaginary characters, and Stilly's, and Rapaire's, and BeeDub's, and dare I even say it, Donuel's!! You'd be screwed royally, my friend, and you do not want to go there, I promise you.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 06:35 PM

Maybe you're dead, but I don't remember signing on. Why should I have to be dead? I've never tried to kill off any of Little Hawk's figments. I think I once accused Penelope of being a transexual, but that's not the same as killing her off. I've known a few transexuals and they've all been alive. Sure, a couple of 'em are dead now but they weren't dead when I met 'em.

Anyway, enough of that. I call dibs on Stilly's leftover catsup packages.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 04:30 PM

It's too late for that. We're all dead, remember?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 04:13 PM

YEah, you wanna burn that ammonia right out... thanks for the thought!

Little Hawk, you have been upset by having your creations undermined by us frabjous good for nothings. But...I mean, I understand, and all, but don't you see the incredible opportunity here to rise above the ordinary?>



A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 03:49 PM

No one said anything, so I brought you all back some Sonic #2s (lettuce, mustard, pickle, onion) and a big order of tater tots and catsup packages.

This might be that burger meat with ammonia-sprayed scrapings that went in the regrind, so I made sure they cooked them to well-done.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 03:44 PM

What the heck. Let's just say they've all died. Members, Guests, fictional characters, everybody that normally comes here. Max, me, Spaw, Amos, Rapaire, Ron Davies, Shane, Chinga, Khandu, Teribus, DougR, CarolC, Penelope Rutledge, the Little Pissant, Big Mick, Obama, Rush Limbaugh, Larry King, Madonna, EVERYBODY. Just issue one general great big obit for everyone here and sign off for good. It'll make a neat ending to the whole thing and we can start something brand new in some other lifetime. Some other planet even.

Nice to have known you. ;-) Good luck in the next one. Bye.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 03:38 PM

That reminds me. Certain sources which I cannot disclose report that a SOG operation rescued a chimp in Afghanistan about a week ago. DNA shows it to be "Chongo Chim" of Chicago, Illinois. The chimp was in fairly good health, except for having his testicles and scrotum shot off by a bullet or piece of shrapnel. He is expected to be returned to hospital in the US within a week or so.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 03:28 PM

The skies over San Diego are gradually recovering their classic twinkly blue visage after several days of crude interruptions by what I believe Northerners call "cloud formations". There was some vandal flying around dumping water on the streets and buildings, but we stood firm and in the end all he could do is wash the dust off our sleepy little Navy town. We are once again bathed in themost delicate, docile sunlight.

I am sorry Shane has gone to be with Chongo in the Lost Friends in the Sky dumpster. If he sees my rubber monkey ELijah from 1950, tell him to say hello.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 03:10 PM

well, it seems someone has filled my delivery system up with water....


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 03:06 PM

Stand and deliver! 33900!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 02:48 PM

Shane would be most gratified at your kind attention, gentlemen, were he not otherwise indisposed at the moment.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 02:38 PM

Po' Shane is daid; Old Shane shur is daid
All gather at the kegger for a round
He didn't bathe for years
so why should we shed tears
why did he take so long to die?

Po Shane is daid, break a bottle on his haid...


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 02:18 PM

Lots More Beer

CHORUS: We shall meet, but we shan't miss him
There will be a lot more beer
We shall bury and forget him
Shame McBride will not be here.

When just a week ago we gathered
Bloodshot were his pale blue eyes
Now forever closed in slumber
And he never more will rise.

CH


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 01:45 PM

"The hoser which can be hosed is not the true hoser."


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 12:28 PM

Hark--a flash of incensed indignation zips across our perfect skies trailing brown smoke and a furrowed brow of divine wrath!!

Oh, ye Little of Hawk, it is your challenge, your karma, and your fate to learn to rise above the petty minded objections of the tediously reality-centered!!

I am but a foil, a reflecrion, a mirror designed to show every blemish in the perfection of your transcendant Creative Identity. When you perfect your ability to confront my snarky critiques without blanching, flinching, or flushing in wrath, then you will be on your way toward Genuine Perfection.

Rearn, glasshoppel, rearn!


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 11:53 AM

Oh, but it's perfectly allright when you do it, right, Amos? (as in the case of "Chinga"...another figment of someone's imagination)

Why don't you live up to your own rhetoric and stop composing stories about her if you find fictional characters to be such a jejeune and puerile waste of people's time?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 11:49 AM

♫♫

Oh, I'm goin' down to the figment farm
Where it ain't too cold but it ain't too warm
And them figments fly like bees in a swarm
Down on the figment farm

Oh, the figment farm is a mighty fine place
For a stoner, a drunk or a mental case
Or someone who came from out space
Down on the figment farm

Oh, it's pretty far from the beaten track
It's a right fine place for an acid flashback
I'm goin' there but I'll be back
Down on the figment farm

♫♫


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 11:19 AM

...or reality from a figment farm....



A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 11:11 AM

Beer deprivation would do it for sure. Only trouble is, Shane knows nothing worth revealing, so making him crack is a futile exercise akin to attempting to extract milk from a male ostrich or progressive social reform legislation from a Republican.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 11:09 AM

Amos, I know other ways to break someone as well. Wanna hear 'em? They don't leave physical marks, either (those are a special category).


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 10:16 AM

Hey, MOM, I have to go to the office today. Want to ride along? I'll stop and get you a greasy burger and tater tots at the Sonic Drive-In on the way home.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 09:59 AM

If there is in fact such a thing as taking fictional data much too seriously, Rapaire may be its poster child.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 10 - 09:02 AM

They'll break him. He'll be just like a little baby when they finish with him: crying and soiling his pants and...wait, how could they tell?

Anyway, he'll talk. If the Massad can't do it there are Others who can. Perhaps the T. E. Lawrence treatment...no, he might like that. A shot of scopolamine behind the eyeballs, saturating whatever passes for his frontal lobes; a bath; beer deprivation....


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Jan 10 - 09:43 PM

If they want Shane to crack, they would get the best results by playing classical music or polkas.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jan 10 - 08:05 PM

Could also be why he's been targeted by various international spy agencies... I understand that the Massad ties you to a chair, blindfolds you, and plays "Hava Nagila" until you crack.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 26 Jan 10 - 07:19 PM

I believe people who are abducted by aliens are, in fact, aliens themselves. They've been dispatched to our planet to serve as recording and monitoring devices. Their periodic "abductions" are for the purpose of taking them back to their mother ships so the data they've absorbed can be downloaded into the ships' computers.

Of course, the "abductees" are totally unaware of their own true identities. Before they were dropped off on Earth, their memories of their alien lives were erased and replaced with suitable sets of human "memories".

When you look at it from that perspective, a lot of stuff about Shane McBride falls right into place, doesn't it?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jan 10 - 06:38 PM

Then why were we told that all worlds are ours except Europa?? Huh? Explain that if you can!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 26 Jan 10 - 06:36 PM

Hey Mom! Did I mention that a friend of mine was on "ELLEN" yesterday? And the clip with her in it is on You-tube and the ELLEN site, and I think FaceBook.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Jan 10 - 06:23 PM

How about Unforgettium, Inestimium, and Incomprehensium?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Jan 10 - 05:15 PM

From a Terran's point of view, of course, Pandora is an alien planet and its natives are aliens. No-one should not be allowed into space who cannot outgrow this primitive chauvinism, however. Jingoism has no place in inter-planetary relations. Unobtainium or no unobtainium.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jan 10 - 03:33 PM

"All planets are yours except Europa. Attempt no landing there."

Ergo, Pandora IS our planet. Tell them aliens to get off or pay rent.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate
Next Page

 


You must be a member to post in non-music threads. Join here.


You must be a member to post in non-music threads. Join here.



Mudcat time: 18 August 6:56 AM EDT

[ Home ]

All original material is copyright © 1998 by the Mudcat Café Music Foundation, Inc. All photos, music, images, etc. are copyright © by their rightful owners. Every effort is taken to attribute appropriate copyright to images, content, music, etc. We are not a copyright resource.