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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Little Hawk 29 Apr 08 - 07:27 PM
Amos 29 Apr 08 - 07:25 PM
Amos 29 Apr 08 - 05:44 PM
Little Hawk 29 Apr 08 - 04:52 PM
Rapparee 29 Apr 08 - 03:53 PM
Acme 29 Apr 08 - 03:41 PM
Amos 29 Apr 08 - 03:07 PM
Little Hawk 29 Apr 08 - 02:16 PM
Amos 29 Apr 08 - 11:58 AM
Rapparee 29 Apr 08 - 11:32 AM
Amos 29 Apr 08 - 10:45 AM
MMario 29 Apr 08 - 10:35 AM
Acme 29 Apr 08 - 10:30 AM
Rapparee 29 Apr 08 - 08:58 AM
Acme 28 Apr 08 - 10:24 PM
Rapparee 28 Apr 08 - 08:47 PM
Amos 28 Apr 08 - 07:34 PM
Acme 28 Apr 08 - 07:07 PM
Rapparee 28 Apr 08 - 04:35 PM
Acme 28 Apr 08 - 03:16 PM
Amos 28 Apr 08 - 10:49 AM
Rapparee 28 Apr 08 - 09:36 AM
Amos 27 Apr 08 - 11:15 PM
Acme 27 Apr 08 - 10:58 PM
Amos 27 Apr 08 - 10:16 PM
Rapparee 27 Apr 08 - 10:07 PM
Acme 27 Apr 08 - 02:08 PM
GUEST,Amos 27 Apr 08 - 12:08 PM
Acme 27 Apr 08 - 12:00 AM
Rapparee 26 Apr 08 - 09:50 PM
Acme 26 Apr 08 - 07:24 PM
Rapparee 26 Apr 08 - 06:27 PM
Amos 26 Apr 08 - 05:49 PM
Acme 26 Apr 08 - 12:23 PM
Rapparee 26 Apr 08 - 11:38 AM
Amos 25 Apr 08 - 08:51 PM
Little Hawk 25 Apr 08 - 07:49 PM
Rapparee 25 Apr 08 - 06:05 PM
Amos 25 Apr 08 - 03:42 PM
Amos 25 Apr 08 - 01:24 PM
Amos 25 Apr 08 - 10:50 AM
Acme 25 Apr 08 - 09:38 AM
Rapparee 25 Apr 08 - 09:24 AM
Janie 25 Apr 08 - 09:09 AM
Rapparee 25 Apr 08 - 09:00 AM
Acme 25 Apr 08 - 08:40 AM
Janie 24 Apr 08 - 11:49 PM
Amos 24 Apr 08 - 11:25 PM
Janie 24 Apr 08 - 11:22 PM
Acme 24 Apr 08 - 11:21 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Apr 08 - 07:27 PM

I'll PM you about it, Amos. Presently.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Apr 08 - 07:25 PM

By the way -- only SIX posts until Mister Rapaire's COSMIC SPINNER lands and becomes his very own.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Apr 08 - 05:44 PM

M. Hack, you do me a grievous disservice. I am not asking in order to scoff at you. But a link to an earlier exposition would serve. I really am curious to know what you saw.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Apr 08 - 04:52 PM

Amos, I am completely fed up with telling the details of those sightings online (or offline) to self-absorbed people who have little respect or inclination to give a fair listen to anyone else's opinion but their own, so forget it. Suffice to say, I saw vehicles which were clearly technological in nature, intelligently controlled, and very probably not ours. They could have been secret vehicles built by our Earthly governments, I suppose...but I doubt it.

Yes, Rapaire, they would still be unidentified if recognized as "UFOs". If you don't know whose vehicle it is or where it came from or how it functions then it's unidentified.

Stilly - Okay.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Apr 08 - 03:53 PM

If I see a UFO and recognize it as such, is it still a UFO?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 29 Apr 08 - 03:41 PM

It was apt. The point was that the only "true" items on the cover ARE the UFO sightings. Get it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Apr 08 - 03:07 PM

Not to put too fine a point on it, Liddle Hack, but...well, what did you see? Moving clumps of light? Architectural details? Landings and disembarkings?

Enquiring minds want to know...



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Apr 08 - 02:16 PM

Stilly, I have seen UFOs with my own eyes. (meaning flying vehicles that were very probably not of Earthly origin) I know other people, trustworthy ones, who've seen them also.

I have, however, never seen Hillary having lesbian sex. Nor have I seen Obama's or Bush's rumored marriage breakups firsthand. Nor has anyone else I know.

Therefore I am suggesting that your statement is not apt.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Apr 08 - 11:58 AM

That's why he refused golden showers from the Bumfiddle Sorority Senior Citizen's Chapter all those years. Who knew? I thought he was just being strange, you know...



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Apr 08 - 11:32 AM

A little shower from a shower has never hurt any member of the Idaho Legion. Except for Dirty Fred. Nobody knew that the dirt was all that was holding him together.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Apr 08 - 10:45 AM

A classic timeless example of the very best in early American hovelcraft.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 29 Apr 08 - 10:35 AM

No - I thin that smell is coming from the hovel.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 29 Apr 08 - 10:30 AM

Hmmm. I think there is some fish wrapped in this newspaper.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Apr 08 - 08:58 AM

Ain't no nooky like chinooky.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 28 Apr 08 - 10:24 PM

That was a great little bit they did in Men In Black with those yellow rags.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Apr 08 - 08:47 PM

And it was printed in real ink on genuine paper!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 28 Apr 08 - 07:34 PM

My, my, you know it must all be true -- after all you heard it from a librarian!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 28 Apr 08 - 07:07 PM

Remember, those rags are meant to tell us about UFO news. The rest is window dressing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Apr 08 - 04:35 PM

Whilst waiting to pay for my groceries this weekend past I caught up on the news. It seems that Mr. Obama's marriage has "exploded" and that Mrs. Clinton's been caught out in a "torrid tangle of gay sex." I've not read anything yet about Mr. McCain, but you will remember that Mr. and Mrs. G. W. Bush have been have marital difficulties and that Mrs. Bush has moved into a hotel near the White House.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 28 Apr 08 - 03:16 PM

Hey, Mom, I just fixed a redwood table out on my front porch (put in some carriage bolts to hold the planks in place). I'll clean it up and sand it a little then paint it with some of the leftover house paint from last fall, and you'll have a purty little spot to set your iced tea and National Enquirer when you're out on the front porch reading.

Your favorite daughter,

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 28 Apr 08 - 10:49 AM

'Round the axle, on the Wheel
Daring not to see or feel
Caring not to spout pentameter
Closed upon such small diameter!
Roundly lost, if you were found,
Raised above your dismal ground
Lifted from the dank miasma
Into hopeful, light-filled plasma
From the darkling, fetid ground
To a view for miles around,
Oh, the joy and heart's expansion
Floods of insight, all in scansion!
Freedom from that axle binding,
Greater heights you would be minding,
Broader views, and lights unending,
Brighter minds and hearts befriending!
But, before the sun went down,
Something sad would there be found;
Far above the darkling ground,
Still, it all goes round and round.
There the light-enboldened facts will
Tie you to the larger axle!
On the larger, endless Wheel,
Larger senses also reel.


Sean Moynihan McBehan
There is no Irish in It
Greenwich Village Chapbooks, Inc., 1983


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Apr 08 - 09:36 AM

The Axle, ah yes. Yeats wrote about it, the Rose Tree, the Axle of the World. That was back when he was involve in the Rosicrucians and and the Order of the Golden Dawn.

I know that because I once had a seminar on Yeats and Eliot:

Turning and turning in the widening gyre,
Shall I dare to eat a peach?
Spread out like a patient etherized upon a table
Who stumbles toward Bethlehem to be born.


Studied 'em both at once. It was lots more interesting that way. If you toss in some Robert Frost it becomes even more interesting:

Whose woods these are I think I know
That is no country for old men
I shall wear white flannel trousers.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Apr 08 - 11:15 PM

Thanks for the kind acknowledgment, sweet Still; but, there's the rub, as they say -- if I tried to make serious art of some this stuff it would swamp me in a wet blanket of seriousity, and my junk would end up wrapped around the axle in a most unproductive collision of metaphors.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 Apr 08 - 10:58 PM

Amos, sometimes you really amaze me. Think of what you could be doing if you weren't fooling around here on MOAB. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Apr 08 - 10:16 PM

Thus do numbers lose their souls
Tied to tips on killing moles
Numbers bright and all resplendent
Elevating and transcendent
Now brought low and all quotidian
Dark and hard, like wet obsidian
Save the Spinner, is my prayer,
Make it bright for poor Rapaire
Let it brightly for him ring,
Not some ordinary thing,
SOmething special and contrarian
For our most esteemed librarian.

Higell Deeeh Gilltier
Song from the Market


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Apr 08 - 10:07 PM

I'll know about the book this week -- Kathy went on vacation last week when we were busier than a hen tryin' to lay a square egg.

As for mole and gopher eradication, I'd probably use a .22 on gophers (or trap 'em) and the same poison I just spread for the voles for the moles. Zinc phosphide; works pretty good. Just be sure to pick up the bodies after and dispose of them correctly or it might also kill birds.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 Apr 08 - 02:08 PM

That's days away. Someone will probably forget and post a lawn care tip on that number, about how to off gophers or eradicate moles.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Amos
Date: 27 Apr 08 - 12:08 PM

Start the horns, the bells, the drumming!
Rapaire's spinner's coming, coming
Through the fog and hazy dawning
Sure to bringhim praise and fawning
Ill-deserved by such a sinner,
Maybe we should steal his spinner!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 Apr 08 - 12:00 AM

I forgot to ask--did the Bernardin book get there?

23300 :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Apr 08 - 09:50 PM

Yeah, shucks, I was pretty good there wasn't I?

We gave away about 200 children's books at the city Environmental Fair today, on all sorts of topics. We're also collecting old cell phones and shipping them to a place back East where they're sold to a recycler and the money used to by phone cards for folks in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Our Library is so green we're started to photosynthesize.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 Apr 08 - 07:24 PM

Perfect 10 on that one, Rap!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Apr 08 - 06:27 PM

Gordian-sharp?

I think knot!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Apr 08 - 05:49 PM

I am off to the wilds of North County, far from the mutter of the madding crowd, a peaceful rancho in the hills, well-removed from Granola Jaws and all his ill-tempered kin.

I pray this weekend will restore the health, vibrancy, and Gordian-sharp edge to the mind of my favorite politician.

It could mean a great deal.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 Apr 08 - 12:23 PM

I'm heading out to the local flower walk at a nature center today. I'll take her with me. Just have to take the handcuffs along so she doesn't pick wildflowers in front of the tour and the park ranger like last time . . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Apr 08 - 11:38 AM

Mom! Look, you gotta get with it! You're living in yesterday, but you'll be okay now.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Apr 08 - 08:51 PM

Maybe the shark misunderstood the prescription where it said "per os"; he thought the authorizing signature was really the object of the verb phrase. Sigh....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Apr 08 - 07:49 PM

That shark was taking a big risk! Physicians and the drugs and treatments they prescribe are the third most common cause of premature death (behind heart disease and cancer).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Apr 08 - 06:05 PM

The poor shark was feeling poorly so he saw a veterinarian. What's the problem there? If you were feeling bad you'd see a physician, no? So the vet says to the shark, "Now, open wide."

It was the vet's own fault for making too close of an examination.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Apr 08 - 03:42 PM

Rapaire:

NExt time you decide to travel to San Diego, come in your regular form, would ya? There's no excuse for this kind of thing, and it lowers property values.


A


Shark Attacks, Kills Swimmer Near San Diego
SOLANA BEACH, San Diego County (AP) ¯ A shark attacked and killed a swimmer training in the ocean off San Diego County with a group of local triathletes early Friday, authorities said.


Family friend Rob Hill says the victim was 66-year-old Dave Martin of Solana Beach, a retired veterinarian.

He was swimming with others at Tide Beach around 7 a.m. when he was attacked, according to a statement on the Solana Beach city Web site.

Martin was taken to the Fletcher Cove Park lifeguard station for emergency treatment but was pronounced dead at the scene, the statement said.

Authorities now say an eight-mile stretch of beaches along San Diego County has been closed to swimmers.

Scripps Institution of Oceanography shark expert Richard Rosenblatt says the shark was probably a great white between 12 and 17 feet long.

Martin suffered a single bite that crossed both legs, Solana Beach Deputy Fire Chief Dismas Abelman said. "It looks like the shark came up, bit him, and swam away," said Abelman.

Rosenblatt said the victim was likely killed with a single upward thrust and bite. Water in the area is 20 to 30 feet deep. Rosenblatt said it's unlikely the shark can be located.

The attack took place about 150 yards offshore and several swimmers wearing wetsuits were in a group when the shark attacked, Solana Beach lifeguard Craig Miller said.

Miller said two swimmers were about 20 yards ahead of the Martin when they heard him scream for help. They turned around and dragged him back to shore. He was declared dead at 7:49 a.m., Miller said.

Swimmers were ordered out of the water for a 17-mile stretch around Solano Beach as the county Sheriff's Department sent helicopters up to scan the waters for the shark.

"The shark is still in the area. We're sure of that," Mayor Joe Kellejian said.

Miller said the beaches could remain closed for 72 hours.

It was unknown what kind of shark was involved.

Solana Beach is 14 miles northwest of San Diego.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Apr 08 - 01:24 PM

Rapaire says Pocatello, but in his heart he knows he is really dreaming of San Diego.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Apr 08 - 10:50 AM

Off to the Fortress of Solitude!! Tadaaaa!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 Apr 08 - 09:38 AM

He and Lex Luthor.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Apr 08 - 09:24 AM

It's not. Just from about mid-December to Mid-March, usually. This is a Very Odd Year For Weather. Even at the height of the season the average LOW is about 20F. With Global Warming I expect Pocatello to be a seaside resort, with the waters gently lapping the sunny beaches and surfers riding the waves.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 25 Apr 08 - 09:09 AM

Stilly - Mr. Bill.

Oh no, Rapaire, I don't do winter from October to April.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Apr 08 - 09:00 AM

Take the money and the plants and move to Idaho. Move to Pocatello -- we have a 2.9% percent unemployment rate, new businesses coming in, a very active music scene, a university, affordable housing, great scenery, good location, and one of the truly great public libraries. The weather averages out pretty good too.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 Apr 08 - 08:40 AM

Janie, how many presidents DO we have? Which one was this? :-)

Are you still digging up plants in that soon-to-be-ex-yard?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 24 Apr 08 - 11:49 PM

I have to say, it was pretty neat to see one of our presidents fairly up-close. Hillsborough being a small town, and the publicity being well-controlled, it was a small gathering. Standing at the very back of the crowd, I was still no more than 40 feet away from him. The crowd was mostly gawkers, like me.

He does not look as tall as I expected. He needs a haircut imho, the hair length is approaching the pompadour look of elderly southern senators of yor. He looked very, very tired. He is a tremendous public speaker and does a great job of connecting with the audience. He tripped climbing into the back of the pick-up truck that substituted for a stage, and looks just as silly as the rest of us when we trip, wobble, throw our hands up in the air and open our mouths in those big OHs of momentary alarm, then grin in embarrassment and relief when we don't land on our bums.

I did not follow the admonishments to walk the ten steps from the site (and my office) to vote early. And I still don't know who I am voting for in the primary. Maybe I'll write in Shane.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Apr 08 - 11:25 PM

You go, girl; get the chapter put to bed, and start dancing down the next stretch.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 24 Apr 08 - 11:22 PM

Bonafide BS alert! The judge signed the consent order for property settlement today. I'm torn between crying in my beer and raising a glass of wine in celebration of my purchase of another strip of highway on the road to peace-of-mind.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Apr 08 - 11:21 PM

So, do you think Janie could earn a few extra bucks if she set up a virtual practice?


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