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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 01 Dec 10 - 03:45 PM
Rapparee 01 Dec 10 - 03:23 PM
Amos 01 Dec 10 - 03:12 PM
Eiseley 01 Dec 10 - 03:07 PM
Rapparee 01 Dec 10 - 02:48 PM
Amos 01 Dec 10 - 11:59 AM
Rapparee 01 Dec 10 - 11:07 AM
Amos 01 Dec 10 - 11:03 AM
Amos 01 Dec 10 - 10:54 AM
Amos 01 Dec 10 - 10:22 AM
Rapparee 01 Dec 10 - 10:03 AM
Amos 01 Dec 10 - 09:29 AM
Little Hawk 01 Dec 10 - 03:07 AM
Acme 01 Dec 10 - 12:00 AM
Rapparee 30 Nov 10 - 10:22 PM
Amos 30 Nov 10 - 09:36 PM
Amos 30 Nov 10 - 09:35 PM
Rapparee 30 Nov 10 - 09:14 PM
Amos 30 Nov 10 - 08:54 PM
Little Hawk 30 Nov 10 - 07:14 PM
Rapparee 30 Nov 10 - 06:46 PM
Little Hawk 30 Nov 10 - 06:11 PM
Amos 30 Nov 10 - 06:06 PM
Rapparee 30 Nov 10 - 05:38 PM
Little Hawk 30 Nov 10 - 04:30 PM
Amos 30 Nov 10 - 03:59 PM
Rapparee 30 Nov 10 - 03:30 PM
Amos 30 Nov 10 - 01:36 PM
Acme 30 Nov 10 - 12:25 PM
Amos 30 Nov 10 - 10:33 AM
Rapparee 30 Nov 10 - 10:25 AM
Amos 30 Nov 10 - 09:29 AM
Rapparee 30 Nov 10 - 01:05 AM
GUEST,Albert Schweitzer 29 Nov 10 - 11:35 PM
Amos 29 Nov 10 - 11:04 PM
Rapparee 29 Nov 10 - 10:30 PM
Acme 29 Nov 10 - 10:11 PM
Rapparee 29 Nov 10 - 08:55 PM
Amos 29 Nov 10 - 08:36 PM
Amos 29 Nov 10 - 07:57 PM
Rapparee 29 Nov 10 - 05:29 PM
Amos 29 Nov 10 - 05:12 PM
Rapparee 29 Nov 10 - 02:56 PM
Amos 29 Nov 10 - 02:24 PM
MMario 29 Nov 10 - 01:33 PM
Amos 29 Nov 10 - 12:25 PM
Amos 29 Nov 10 - 11:53 AM
Acme 29 Nov 10 - 11:42 AM
Amos 29 Nov 10 - 10:18 AM
Rapparee 29 Nov 10 - 10:11 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Dec 10 - 03:45 PM

Make The Money You
Deserve To Make


by


taking your musical
talents to the next level!!



Now is the time to capitalize on whatever musical talents you have by
learning the popular – and profitable – art of Mariachi Banjo! Yes,
you’ll begin by playing at parties and before you know it you’ll be the
leader of a Mariachi Band consisting of not only your banjo, but also
hammered dulcimer, bagpipes, and even piccolo!    Gather with your
friends and send a certified check (or cheque) for only $150.00 (US)
today to :




Mariachi Studies


PO Box 4905


Pocatello, Idaho 83205-4905




Your lesson will begin when the check (or cheque) clears.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Dec 10 - 03:23 PM

Damned duckdog's gone somewhere/time/space else. I'm going to the dentist.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Dec 10 - 03:12 PM

I've read TNOTB at lkeast twice, amigo; I know you wearn to be a similarly fictional character, but I don't feel right letting you go beyond the pale, as your friend and all.

At least not in a publically documented thread.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 01 Dec 10 - 03:07 PM

"Enough about me," he said. "Let's talk about you. What do you think about me?"

Hmmm.

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Dec 10 - 02:48 PM

Dear Amos:

Please read Robert A. Heinlein's wonderful book, "The Number of the Beast" -- especially the last chapte

Quark!


Quark!


Quark! 


Quark!


Quark!


Quark!


Quark!


damned duckdog off my leg!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Dec 10 - 11:59 AM

Don't make me repeat myself, Rapp...



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Dec 10 - 11:07 AM

Me, Billy Bob, "Sam the Man" Clemens, Jeffy "Saucy" Chaucer, Al Pope, Jonny Swift, Dottie Parker, Em Dickinson, "Wild Woman Annie" Radcliffe -- shucks, man, we'd wreck bars and beat up cops. It's hard to forget "Big John" Dunne going hand-to-hand with Georgie Gordon in The Tabard in Southwark -- goin' fine until Chris Marlowe tossed a knife to Georgie, which REALLY got Sam the Man made and he tossed Big John a Colt's Revolver, and that made Dottie and Em break it up with fire extinguishers before somebody really got hurt. Al Ginsburg got 'em to kiss and make up -- literally.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Dec 10 - 11:03 AM

"Narcissists, much to the surprise of many experts, are in the process of becoming an endangered species.

Not that they face imminent extinction — it's a fate much worse than that. They will still be around, but they will be ignored.

The fifth edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (due out in 2013, and known as DSM-5) has eliminated five of the 10 personality disorders that are listed in the current edition.

Narcissistic personality disorder is the most well-known of the five, and its absence has caused the most stir in professional circles.

Most nonprofessionals have a pretty good sense of what narcissism means, but the formal definition is more precise than the dictionary meaning of the term.

Our everyday picture of a narcissist is that of someone who is very self-involved — the conversation is always about them. While this characterization does apply to people with narcissistic personality disorder, it is too broad. There are many people who are completely self-absorbed who would not qualify for a diagnosis of N.P.D.

The central requirement for N.P.D. is a special kind of self-absorption: a grandiose sense of self, a serious miscalculation of one's abilities and potential that is often accompanied by fantasies of greatness. It is the difference between two high school baseball players of moderate ability: one is absolutely convinced he'll be a major-league player, the other is hoping for a college scholarship.

Of course, it would be premature to call the major-league hopeful a narcissist at such an early age, but imagine that same kind of unstoppable, unrealistic attitude 10 or 20 years later.

The second requirement for N.P.D.: since the narcissist is so convinced of his high station (most are men), he automatically expects that others will recognize his superior qualities and will tell him so. This is often referred to as "mirroring." It's not enough that he knows he's great. Others must confirm it as well, and they must do so in the spirit of "vote early, and vote often."

Finally, the narcissist, who longs for the approval and admiration of others, is often clueless about how things look from someone else's perspective. Narcissists are very sensitive to being overlooked or slighted in the smallest fashion, but they often fail to recognize when they are doing it to others.

Most of us would agree that this is an easily recognizable profile, and it is a puzzle why the manual's committee on personality disorders has decided to throw N.P.D. off the bus. Many experts in the field are not happy about it.

Actually, they aren't happy about the elimination of the other four disorders either, and they're not shy about saying so.

One of the sharpest critics of the DSM committee on personality disorders is a Harvard psychiatrist, Dr. John Gunderson, an old lion in the field of personality disorders and the person who led the personality disorders committee for the current manual.

Asked what he thought about the elimination of narcissistic personality disorder, he said it showed how "unenlightened" the personality disorders committee is.

"They have little appreciation for the damage they could be doing." He said the diagnosis is important in terms of organizing and planning treatment.

"It's draconian," he said of the decision, "and the first of its kind, I think, that half of a group of disorders are eliminated by committee."



I am concerned that if the DSM removes this listing certain habitués of these hallowed halls will possibly simply evaporate.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Dec 10 - 10:54 AM

You rpersonal drinking companion, Billy Bob Shakespeare?

I'troth, it is a grandiose pretense.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Dec 10 - 10:22 AM

Abate the edge of traitors, gracious Lord,
That would reduce these bloody days again,
And make our poor land weep in streams of blood!
Let them not live to taste this land's increase

That would with treason wound this fair land's peace!
Now civil wounds are stopp'd, peace lives again:
That she may long live here, God say amen!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Dec 10 - 10:03 AM

Are the Care Bears all okay?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Dec 10 - 09:29 AM

Well, at least you had the good sense to wear them, anyway!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 01 Dec 10 - 03:07 AM

Thank HEAVENS you did not suffer a serious auto accident or some other medical emergency today, Stilly! ;-) Think of the embarrassment!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 01 Dec 10 - 12:00 AM

I guess I was one of the dumb ones today. I can't believe it but











well,











to tell the truth,


























I wore my underpants inside out all day long. And didn't notice until a few minutes ago.




















I'm so embarrassed.





(But I can still laugh about it. Since no Emergency Room staff discovered this horrible faux pas.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 10:22 PM

Perhaps you need to remember what my ol' buddy Billy Bob Shakespeare wrote: "The fault is not in our stars, my dear Brutus, but in ourselves."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 09:36 PM

MomentÕs HaltÑa momentary taste
Of BEING from the Well amid the WasteÑ
And, Lo! the phantom Caravan has reachÕd
The NOTHING it set out from. Oh, make haste!
          Rub‡iy‡t. Stanza xlviii.

Omay Khayam


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 09:35 PM

I would remind you, along with St Thomas, sir:

"Goodness does not consist in greatness, but greatness in goodness."

So far your experiment is not serving to reflect this simple truth.

Perhaps you need to focus more on the goodness and less on the greatness.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 09:14 PM

That is why I have given you limited free will, not to mention a good dose of stupidity. You are to use the free will to overcome the stupidity. So far this hasn't been going very well....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 08:54 PM

He won't? But he ASSERTS his responsibility for every aspect of them!! This is GROSSLY inconsistent, not to say hypocritical!! Feet of clay!!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 07:14 PM

That was about the response I would have expected. ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 06:46 PM

Your creator will not accept the blame for the stupidity of his creations.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 06:11 PM

Yes, those are pretty all-encompassing. Well, if anything goes wrong, we can just call it an act of God and blame it all on Rapparee.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 06:06 PM

Talk about seeing yourself reflected in life, how about Rapparee's visions, eh?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 05:38 PM

That reminds me. The Gents up at the Hovel, destroyed a few days ago by an explosion and fire, is again operational. A fire suppression system, using the technology used for extinguishing aircraft fires, was installed along with a state-of-the-art, EPA-approved, air exchanger. This brings to a halt all of those pesky EPA fines about the release of "noxious fumes" and things. There was, I understand, a little conflict between the EPA and CDC but the US Public Health Service came down flatly on the side of the EPA and the CDC will have to conduct its experimentation and observations elsewhere.

The porta-potties used as temporary conveniences have been ordered incinerated and their ashes will be encased in concrete and shipped to the Yucca Mountain Waste Storage Site.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 04:30 PM

You are per'aps seeing yourself reflected in the mirror of life, mon cher! ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 03:59 PM

It's all Geek to me, anyway.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 03:30 PM

Did you say "Greek" or "Geek"?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 01:36 PM

Do you have a backup?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 12:25 PM

MOM! My computer desk is so clean, and yet my mind is still full! The myth about the clean desk and empty mind is just that - a myth. But I still can't speak Greek. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 10:33 AM

The second irony is the crappy grammar of the writer of the report. Barbarians within the gates, long since...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 10:25 AM

He shot the projector. This does not bode well for movies.

(Yes, the irony occurred to me as well. But as the historian said, "Civilization is like a great and beautiful city on the bank of a river down which flows a trickle of blood. Sometimes the river overflows and the city has to be rebuilt."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 09:29 AM

On Monday afternoon, police received a phone call from the principal of Marinette High School, in Marinette, Wisc., alerting authorities that a Western Civilization class were being held at gunpoint on the campus.

The class was watching a film about Greek myths when a male student left the classroom. He returned moments later with a backpack.

...


Does the irony of this strike anyone else?



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Nov 10 - 01:05 AM

Those are my old spatulae! They were so very good to me in life! I am glad that they are in Spatula Heaven with Dr. Schweitzer. Wait...there's a tunnel opening with a bright light at the end...I...I see...spatualae...they are telling me...telling me...to return, for Amos is not yet ready and I am The Selected One to prepare him....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Albert Schweitzer
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 11:35 PM

I know you are all waiting to die so you can go to spatula heaven!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 11:04 PM

Well, the weather, of course, makes people nervous about having enough bathrooms...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 10:30 PM

We figured one time that we could sleep, in beds of one sort or another, about 12 people. We have sleeping bags and pads for a couple more. After that about 10 more who bring their own sleeping stuff could be accommodated, but privacy would go pffft and you'd have to schedule the bathrooms.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 10:11 PM

Location, location, location. Think of what your house would sell for if you moved it to CA, Rap. See if Gluon will give you a hand. That duck dog has been might quiet lately.

Maybe that's where my spatulas went to. S/he buried them in that old worm hold out past the fence on the 16th hole.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 08:55 PM

3 beds: $728,000
Full Baths: 2
Square Feet: 1820

Ranch Style home that offers a bright and open floor plan. With Frech doors, plantation shutters, designer window treatment all in neutral colors. Newer kitchen cabinets, w/granite & stainless appliances. Lg Master Bdrm suite has walkin closet & bath has dual vanities. Formal living rm with vaulted ceilings, plantation shutters,fireplace and french doors facing the private backyard patio. Entertain on the private patio or enjoy the sauna. Newer roof and tankless water heater.


6 beds
3 full baths + 1/2 bath
2.5 kitchens
3,500 square feet. NFS.

Ranch Style house that offers a bright and open floor plan with great northern light perfect for art projects, etc. Neutral colors but slowly being changed for something non-neutral. Solid wood cabinets in all kitchen areas, including a full pantry on the first floor. No radon-emitting granite; white appliances that permit better quality at lower prices. Master bedroom has completely refurbished bath and walk-in closet. Guest suite on lower level has a private kitchen, newly renovated bath. High-speed (wired and hence secure) Internet throughout. Two WBFP. Large back yard opens onto golf course; RV pad to back yard. Two car garage. Plenty of storage.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 08:36 PM

Whying My Hereness

A quorum of gobble
A whiffle of gab
A dodder of fatuous
Hobbledy-hab
One frabjous tumescent,
ANd a spindly spy
Convened on the forum
Where mongrel-flies try
To winkle the wily
And fumble the few
And slum with the slyly
Effulgent, and you.

I frown on the woffle
And disdain the gabble
And scorn every fatuous
Hobbledy-habble.
I ignore the tumescent
And the spindly, also
And the mongrel-flies I
Will pretend not to know.
And the wily I willingly
Shun by the shins
And fracture the slyly
effulgent within.
I won't winkle wily ones
Nor fragment the few,
But I always delight
When you come into view.

Mary Slimme Pikkins
Sentiments from a Higher Plane
Yellow Basket Press, Precious, Iowa, 1954


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 07:57 PM

I tried to go check your webcm to see how bad it was, Rapp, but it was off-line due to inclement weather. No joke.

I am glad you feel alive by conquering the elements.

When you get tired of that game, and are comfortable in your aliveness, let me know and I'll find you a house. There's a nice one right next door for sale.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 05:29 PM

Through a foot of snow
See Rapparee go
Tho' it's Twenty eff
He goes right-left
With a windchill of six
Still he takes his licks
Because you can feel alive
When you don't take a dive
Not cop out, not turn yellow
By living in mellow
Southern-Cal-By-The-Sea.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 05:12 PM

How dapper, he,
His clapper free,
And all exposed
Goes Rapparee
With absent hose
And zero clothes
And running nose
Rapparee goes.
How dapper, he!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 02:56 PM

You probably forgot and wore your codpiece (size Extra-Extra-Bragging) instead of...never mind.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 02:24 PM

It was those velour pilcrows you had hanging from your hat.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 01:33 PM

Funny - I had to run into the grocery store in my victorian chirstmas garb last night.

I got more funny looks then I do when I go in in my ren-faire garb! And yet it's far closer to "normal" streetwear then the ren garb....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 12:25 PM

I have a whole yard of extra decorative pilcrows, left over from the last manual I wrote. Would you like them to hang on the tree?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 11:53 AM

Rapparee was using them in the yard as part of his science project on "the effects of ultraviolet frequencies from solar radiation on the crystallization of post-digestive byproducts from domesticated canines". He was hoping to win the Science Fair this year and go to State, and I told him he probably would go to State, but not the way he meant...


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 11:42 AM

I couldn't find any of the decorative spatulas when I was decking out the tree last night. Did one of you take them out of the ornament box? I want them washed and back where they belong by this evening.

Or Else.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 10:18 AM

You got that right, man...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Nov 10 - 10:11 AM

Back in high school, Clarity was paramount. Clarity Connors...one of the three female cheerleaders on the cheering squad of the all-boys school. Because it WAS an all-boys school, those who knew were in band -- the only daily co-ed activity. The only co-ed activity that took long trips together. As a result, we were like a family of perfect ladies and gentlemen ("Drink the coffee, it'll put hair on your chest, Joan." "I don't have hair on my chest." "Can I see?" SLAP!). Our band director was a ex-Marine Drill Instructor who had landed in the first waves on Okinawa, Iwo Jima, and Guadalcanal -- no one stepped out of line, at least where he could see them. He was known to bite a sousaphone in two if it was ever so slightly out of tune. One day he was REALLY annoyed by the woodwinds and ate two oboes and a clarinet; he couldn't keep the saxophone down but then no one else could stomach it either.

Ah, those long lost days of my youth -- barefoot walks down sun-drenched lanes to the Old Fishin' Hole, being rescued by Old Shep, Howdy Doody on television, silver mouthpieces who would stay bought...now gone, all gone, to that vale from which no traveler returneth, at least until he serves his sentence. Ou sont les neiges d'antan?


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