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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 24 Mar 09 - 02:20 PM
Rapparee 24 Mar 09 - 12:30 PM
Acme 24 Mar 09 - 12:28 PM
Amos 24 Mar 09 - 10:14 AM
Rapparee 24 Mar 09 - 08:22 AM
Janie 24 Mar 09 - 12:29 AM
Acme 24 Mar 09 - 12:15 AM
Amos 23 Mar 09 - 11:33 PM
Donuel 23 Mar 09 - 11:30 PM
Amos 23 Mar 09 - 11:25 PM
Janie 23 Mar 09 - 10:43 PM
Rapparee 23 Mar 09 - 10:40 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 23 Mar 09 - 09:29 PM
Acme 23 Mar 09 - 07:41 PM
Amos 23 Mar 09 - 06:13 PM
Rapparee 23 Mar 09 - 05:05 PM
Little Hawk 23 Mar 09 - 04:55 PM
Rapparee 23 Mar 09 - 03:04 PM
Amos 23 Mar 09 - 12:41 PM
Rapparee 23 Mar 09 - 08:28 AM
Amos 23 Mar 09 - 01:31 AM
Acme 22 Mar 09 - 11:47 PM
Rapparee 22 Mar 09 - 08:36 PM
Janie 22 Mar 09 - 05:41 PM
Rapparee 22 Mar 09 - 05:07 PM
Amos 22 Mar 09 - 04:58 PM
Janie 22 Mar 09 - 03:38 PM
Amos 22 Mar 09 - 02:44 PM
Amos 22 Mar 09 - 03:35 AM
Acme 22 Mar 09 - 02:30 AM
Amos 22 Mar 09 - 01:35 AM
Janie 21 Mar 09 - 10:29 PM
Janie 21 Mar 09 - 10:24 PM
Rapparee 21 Mar 09 - 10:03 PM
Acme 21 Mar 09 - 07:57 PM
Rapparee 21 Mar 09 - 07:14 PM
Amos 21 Mar 09 - 07:09 PM
Rapparee 21 Mar 09 - 06:40 PM
Rapparee 21 Mar 09 - 06:15 PM
Amos 21 Mar 09 - 05:17 PM
Acme 21 Mar 09 - 05:07 PM
Amos 21 Mar 09 - 04:21 PM
Rapparee 21 Mar 09 - 10:09 AM
MMario 21 Mar 09 - 08:57 AM
Amos 21 Mar 09 - 01:27 AM
Janie 21 Mar 09 - 12:15 AM
Acme 20 Mar 09 - 11:57 PM
Amos 20 Mar 09 - 11:28 PM
Rapparee 20 Mar 09 - 11:00 PM
Rapparee 20 Mar 09 - 10:43 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 02:20 PM

And it's no longer made, being replaced by the 5600F.

So I found one anyway and it'll be here on Thursday. US $123.and change from PC Connection.

Pat just told me 3 to 10 inches of snow tomorrow....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 12:30 PM

Funny.

That's the one I'm going to buy.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 12:28 PM

When you see how well a new scanner works you'll say "Good riddance" to the six year old one. I had to replace one a few months ago and the difference in speed, willingness to actually WORK and volume of operation are wonderful. And it cost less than the last one. Of course.

Canon Canoscan 4400F

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 10:14 AM

IT's that damned Ethical Enviro-sensor circuit Carly made them build into it, dude. It senses ambient levels of irresponsibility and shuts the system down above a certain level. It's a safety measure, you know....



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 08:22 AM

I've discovered that my scanner has croaked. And at a time when I needed it rather badly. I know that entropy increases but why must it increase when I need it not to?

Why is the Universe against me? I created it, fergawdsakes! I must have done so in a fit of depression or self-hate.

Now I have to go out and stimulate the economy by buying a new scanner and the other one not yet six years old.

I'll betcha this wouldn't have happened if Stilly hadn't stolen my number. Since it's her fault I'll send her the bill for my new scanner. And this time I'll get a decent one, not an HP.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 12:29 AM

Edit?

You edit?

Not me, babe. I'm primary process all the way.

especially when it comes time to let the BS roll!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 12:15 AM

That's funny--I didn't even notice the number, just that when I edited the sentence I removed too many words. :-/


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 11:33 PM

Exclusive of what? Do they exclude the funnels and the rudder?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 11:30 PM

I have exclusive pictures of the AIG yacht!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 11:25 PM

Stealin' my number!
What a beautiful way of showing how much you love me!!
Stealin' my number!!
What a wonderful way of showing what you're thinking of me

I can see it, your face is glowing,
I can see it, in your eyes I'm happy you know it

That you been,
Stealin' my number!!
Ya took the number I wanted, and I love what it's doing to you,
Stealin' my number!!
You're incorrigible, I can see wicked things all through you,

The need inside you, I see it showing,
Oh the hunger for it growin'
Baby do you feel it growing,
Are you happy you know it,

That you were stealing my Number
All the while that hunger was growing,,
YA went ahead an' took it
All the time you were plainly knowin'

Didn't have to take it-- you could have left it for me.
You could have held back just one time,
But you had to ignore me!! Yes, ignore me!

Now you're stelaing my number!
What a beautiful way of showing how much you love me!!
Stealin' my number!!
What a wonderful way of showing what you're thinking of me!
I just don't under stand it!
In a world that's bright and free
Why can't you do like I do
And think of no-one else but me!

No, you had to be
The one making free
And stealing my number
SOme day you'll learn not to mess with a man like me girl!
Stealing my number!
SOme day I'll figure out how else I can be girl,

So you won't be, girl,
Won't be stelaing my number
Steraling my number
Stealing my number......

(Fade to mauve)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 10:43 PM

Oh Rapaire, go fork yourself.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 10:40 PM

I noticed that, but being a gentleman I didn't make any fuss about Stilly

STEALING MY NUMBER!!

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! Stilly was mean to me!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 09:29 PM

All hail Stilly River Sage, capturer of the most notable palindromic number "28282"!

If you rotate it 180° it becomes "78787"... sort of... if you use your imagination.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 07:41 PM

If shake them out I bet you could make them last longer. :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 06:13 PM

Mom!! I found the HEPA vacuum bags at Sears. I got a year's supply....



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 05:05 PM

Nah, we don't have any Irish (blood) in us. Viking and Germanic, yeah, but Irish -- nope. You don't think we'd want to be associated with people like the McBrides, do you? Heck, they can barely stand being associated with themselves.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 04:55 PM

Sounds a lot like some of Shane's old family history to me. They emigrated from Ireland back in the 1800's sometime, and it's just been one long tale of disaster from then till now...unless you count Shane's incredible success with women and Don's even slightly (well, considerably) more incredible success with women...and fixing old trucks and cars. Don has parlayed the latter into actually earning a living! This is rare for a McBride. They normally have supported themselves mostly by theft, begging, and going on the dole. Shane follows nobly in the family tradition. Don is a bit of a maverick.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 03:04 PM

Might be, but she sure sent that gal off with a load of rock salt in her sittin' down place. And grandpa wasn't real happy for quite a while neither, sleepin' out in the garage and all like he did. They finally kissed and made up, jist in time for grandpa to have a stroke and die. Leastwise, the doc said it was a stroke, even though grandma went around for a couple weeks with a knowing smile and I noticed that the can of sodium fluoride they kept around to kill roaches with was pretty empty even though it was brand new 'cause I was with grandma when she bought it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 12:41 PM

Your grampa was always forking up whatever he tried. And as I recall she was not a dab hand, more like a flounder, or perhaps a manatee hand...



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 08:28 AM

My grandpa used to fork around in the garden until grandma caught him at it. Never knew the old lady was such a dab hand with a shotgun....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 01:31 AM

WEll, nice to have the comforting certainty that the garden is all forked up, anyway.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 11:47 PM

Hell, Janie, I'm on my THIRD spade fork at this house alone (in 7 years)! I broke a tine off of one, the other turned out to be kind of feeble and I think I cracked the handle, so I bought one last fall that I hope is a real sturdy one. It was the most expensive and heaviest on the rack.

This was one of those days in the garden when every time I wanted to start one task I realized I had to back up and do something else first. As a result, I have cleared up an old compost pile by adding it, sans sticks, to my new compost pile (the sticks in the old one meant it didn't break down like it should have), I cut up and stacked at the curb several large tree limbs that I took down last summer, I dug a new bed (the sod from that generated the compost pile work) and made a run to Home Depot for manure and ran past the park site for free compost (lots of wood chunks in it, I use it more like a mulch around the edge of the garden and to mark the path where I can step in the garden). I planted some tomatoes, and as a bonus, fixed a bicycle for some kids who were kind of far from home, it was dusk, and they thought they just needed a hammer to pound the handlebar into place. It needed a hammer and an Allen wrench, and after that little break, I finished planting and mulching tomatoes. Peppers tomorrow.

MOM, I'm bushed. I knew I had to keep moving until I finished everything (including fixing dinner) because once I sat down (now) I probably wouldn't want to get up again. And I don't.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 08:36 PM

Well, you shouldn't have been forking in the garden in the first place.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 05:41 PM

Wahhhh! I snapped the handle on my garden fork!

10 years, and this is the first time it gave any indication at all that it resented being used like a crowbar.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 05:07 PM

It was 72 yesterday, the sky was bright blue...it's "precipitating" right now and it's 34. But the new tulips and jonquils and daffodils and irises and hyacinths are up and starting to show the tiniest bit of color.

Spitzen Zeigen Vörwarts!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 04:58 PM

Yes ma'a'm. Suck up warmth and sunshine wherever found, and you will have ti in you in reserve for grayer days.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 03:38 PM

Hey Mom, the oven is all clean now, and so are the kitchen and living room windows. If you don't mind, I'll save the rest of the windows for another day and head outside to pot up some plants while there is still plenty of warmth and sunshine left.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 02:44 PM

Ya know, I always did feel like a drifter, about this time of day.
And when the moonlight touches the water,
Surely something touches me,
And I go reaching for the river,
Like it,s reaching for the sea.




I hate to see,
Our mom go driftin' down.
Because it makes me feel,
Were on our last time round,
Oh, yeah....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 03:35 AM

And to you both, salutes for courage, earnestness and stoutness of heart.

We scrubbed all the dishes and dried them. The Ocenaographer, the Retied Physicist and the Choreographer werre joined by new friends, the Education Executive and his wife. A lovely time and a successful experiment in sweet and sour chicken and brown rice. Good talk, good wine, and a good evening.

The kitchen is back to battery and our heads are full.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 02:30 AM

Janie, take it easy on yourself. Keep that recognition of the date modest (and PM if you want to talk. Been there, done that. 10 years ago this year.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 01:35 AM

Dang, Janie, we should make this happenmoe often....



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 10:29 PM

Mmario,

The freds have all headed to Wallstreet, to nibble on the tender and unbruised dna of the unrepentant who sleep dreamlessly, undisturbed by the the consequences of their actions.

Pure as the driven snow, they are, by their own lights.

Come on out. It's safe.

Let's play Deer and Hounds!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 10:24 PM

I'm just a little bit drunk, though not on gin-and-tonic.

It don't happen very often.

Were those curse words, Rap, or a German blessing intended to keep the germies away from the finger?

Lilacs are best pruned immediately after bloom as they do not bloom on new wood. The exception is when they need severe pruning. They generally do not require blood sacrifice, but maybe your's did.

Atonement, and all that. You know?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 10:03 PM

Spitzen Zeigen Vörwarts




(As we say around here.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 07:57 PM

Those kinds of cuts do smart, that's for sure.

I'm putting out soaker hoses this afternoon. MOM doesn't want the chard to dry out, the colors are so pretty and it tastes so good. And it's free. :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 07:14 PM

Jist clearin' out some over-thick lilac canes -- like three inches across over-thick -- and the little pruning saw slipped a bit. Good clean cuts, healed right up after we put a band-aid on good and tight. Then we replaced it with a looser band-aid after a bit.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 07:09 PM

Saw...you can't saw very well? Or you weren't really trying?

ANyway, I suggest taking up smoking--the high nicotine level in theblood does wonders for your healing of nicks and cuts.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 06:40 PM

And I'm glad, too, because it's my trigger finger. Would've been harder to shoot them that needs shootin' and runnin' a blade into those who need a little bleedin' to restore their Humours.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 06:15 PM

I just tried to saw my finger off. Fortunately for Mom's pocketbook bandaids seem to have taken care of it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 05:17 PM

What a relief--here I thought she was slumming!! Dang, why do those two activities look so similar???



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 05:07 PM

Don't worry, Amos. MOM was just down on her hands and knees putting in bedding plants for the garden.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 04:21 PM

Stet!

ANyway, you guys have gotten so intimidated between Freds and Bettys this place looks like five minutes after the Flintstones.

Mom is drifting in the blood-hungry clutches of insane entropy. You want insanity? There's insanity for you!! By definition!! Uniform distribution!! Reduction of order!!! Negative order!!! Why, it's downright socialist.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 10:09 AM

I'm going to go out in the yard and eat pull weeds.

So there.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 08:57 AM

I can't see you so you can't see me!

I'm not coming out. You just want me to come out so the freds can eat me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 01:27 AM

Hey, the bath-with-Gin and Tonic idea sounds pretty good. All hands on deck...



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 12:15 AM

Which reminds me of my first "date" with my ex. (Thinking about this because I just received notice that the divorce is final. Both sad and liberating.)

A walk in the woods, off the beaten trail, with many stops to poke a stick into assorted wild animal turds to determine 1. what animal; and 2. what were they eating at that time of year. "Doctor of Turdology", is what he called himself.

In truth, he is a gifted teacher who empowers people to step off the track and be in nature, afraid or not. To recognize we are no different from, and very much a part of, the natural world.




Meanwhile, back at the ranch, I run and give my chivalrous brother Amos a hug as I spit in the freds eye and stick my tongue out at Rapaire.





MMario?

MMario? Come on out now. Let's play. MOM is in the the bath with bubbles and a gin-and-tonic. She ain't in the mood to whap anybody else.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 20 Mar 09 - 11:57 PM

Aw, Janie, isn't that cute? He's being chivalrous.

He doesn't know the Freds can do us no harm. We'd just spit in their eyes (compound eyes, like on a fly). Shoo them away. Scrape them off our shoes like a chunk of dog poop.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Mar 09 - 11:28 PM

Ahem...Ladies...don't open that screen door. BEing of soft tissue and delicate inclination, you lot are especially flavorfl from a freds point of view. Or, so I have been told. I'm a bit on the wiry side, in most places, so they take one look and veer off to the other side of the galaxy. Lemme see if I can scare them off.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Mar 09 - 11:00 PM

But before I go, Janie might get some information of use here, here, and here.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Mar 09 - 10:43 PM

Nope, if you save a life you are responsible for it. If you don't bad, bad, bad kharma will getcha because you have interfered in the eternal cycle of ying and yang.

Gonna go get drunk, beat up a coupla cops, and let Janie take the blame....


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