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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 09 Oct 15 - 05:10 PM
Rapparee 08 Oct 15 - 11:03 PM
gnu 08 Oct 15 - 09:23 PM
Acme 08 Oct 15 - 07:38 PM
Rapparee 08 Oct 15 - 03:58 PM
gnu 08 Oct 15 - 01:54 PM
Rapparee 08 Oct 15 - 11:04 AM
Rapparee 08 Oct 15 - 10:24 AM
Rapparee 08 Oct 15 - 10:10 AM
gnu 07 Oct 15 - 10:08 PM
gnu 07 Oct 15 - 08:48 AM
gnu 06 Oct 15 - 11:04 AM
Rapparee 05 Oct 15 - 11:34 PM
gnu 05 Oct 15 - 02:02 PM
gnu 04 Oct 15 - 08:25 PM
Rapparee 04 Oct 15 - 07:38 PM
gnu 04 Oct 15 - 07:22 AM
Amos 04 Oct 15 - 07:20 AM
GUEST,Sir R., villain exraordinaire 04 Oct 15 - 01:51 AM
maeve 03 Oct 15 - 04:26 PM
Rapparee 02 Oct 15 - 07:31 PM
Rapparee 02 Oct 15 - 02:21 PM
GUEST, ^*^ 02 Oct 15 - 12:11 PM
Rapparee 02 Oct 15 - 11:32 AM
gnu 02 Oct 15 - 06:15 AM
Rapparee 01 Oct 15 - 09:42 PM
Rapparee 01 Oct 15 - 08:33 AM
Rapparee 30 Sep 15 - 09:00 PM
gnu 30 Sep 15 - 01:31 PM
Rapparee 30 Sep 15 - 11:22 AM
Rapparee 29 Sep 15 - 10:24 PM
maeve 29 Sep 15 - 04:33 PM
Rapparee 28 Sep 15 - 09:04 PM
Rapparee 28 Sep 15 - 05:47 PM
gnu 28 Sep 15 - 10:49 AM
Rapparee 28 Sep 15 - 10:14 AM
Rapparee 27 Sep 15 - 09:17 PM
gnu 27 Sep 15 - 03:39 PM
Acme 27 Sep 15 - 01:14 PM
Rapparee 26 Sep 15 - 09:52 PM
Ebbie 26 Sep 15 - 02:21 PM
Rapparee 25 Sep 15 - 08:52 PM
Amos 25 Sep 15 - 11:55 AM
Amos 25 Sep 15 - 12:22 AM
Rapparee 24 Sep 15 - 08:58 PM
gnu 24 Sep 15 - 06:53 PM
Amos 24 Sep 15 - 02:41 PM
Rapparee 24 Sep 15 - 12:59 PM
Amos 24 Sep 15 - 11:24 AM
Rapparee 24 Sep 15 - 09:39 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Oct 15 - 05:10 PM

Seriously, you don't know? I thought everyone knew!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 15 - 11:03 PM

You really don't know???


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 08 Oct 15 - 09:23 PM

Agggghhhhh! Constantly! Emails from buyers in Kijiji that ask, "Is this still available?" Yes it is you dumb fuck! I don't post shit for sale that isn't for sale. Jesus H. Christ what is wrong with these morons?

BTW, what does the "H." stand for? I forgot to ask Dad before he died.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Oct 15 - 07:38 PM

Agreed, not voting pisses me off, and be glad she was aware of your sex. Sometimes it is good to be on the radar.

I'll be sporadically on the radar for the next week. Another pilgrimage for one of MOM's children. Boston, then NYC. A wedding, then some fun.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 15 - 03:58 PM

Ask her for one that says "None recently."

At least you voted. Not voting pisses me off.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 08 Oct 15 - 01:54 PM

Done my duty today. Voted at Elections Canada. Pissed off that my sealed ballot then went in an envelope that I had to sign but, hopefully, it will be counted. It also pissed me off that the form I had to fill out required denoting my sex. It had two options... male or female. I wanted one that said "Please". The lass told me they have forms that include "Other" if anyone asks. How fucking odd... you gotta REQUEST one of those forms???? She actually reached over and Xed the "Male" box and said, "Last time you checked." I was very pissed off.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 15 - 11:04 AM

Dibs on 53335!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 15 - 10:24 AM

Never mind. That Privy Council has the fanciest outhouse I've seen since Steve's dad build one as an A-frame.

But a speech from the throne? I understand that Lyndon Johnson sometimes did that, but I figgered that Canada had better taste.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 15 - 10:10 AM

Can I donate? I hate to think of your Council meeting in a privy. The smell must be terrible and if it's like a number of privies I know the door is going to fall off one of these days. Wasps and black widow spiders have been known to build their nests in privies and can give the users a nasty surprise. I've know a couple of guys who were relaxing in the privy with a Sears catalog when a six or eight legged critter took objection and injected their dangling bits with a load of something that caused an unwanted swelling and a trip to the hospital. Then a couple weeks later the skin started sloughing off and the parts were raw and tender as new skin started growing. This caused Bob (not his real name) a problem when his date started getting frisky one Saturday night; poor girl was traumatized when Bob screamed, leaped out of the car, and started running around holding his private parts (which is what she wanted to do); she entered a cloistered convent the next day and spent the rest of her life doing penance. Bob got to like pain and enlisted in the Marines. So if I can send, say, ten bucks, to help your council out just let me know. Even a room at the Hot Sheets Motel is usually better than meeting in a privy.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 07 Oct 15 - 10:08 PM

Privy council says it's not binding on a new government under caretaking rules during an election. COME ON TOM!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 07 Oct 15 - 08:48 AM

By golly, the critter went and done it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 06 Oct 15 - 11:04 AM

We live in a dicktatorship. If Harper wants it signed, he will have the minister sign it. Then there will be a big mess, especially if he gets the boot on October 19.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Oct 15 - 11:34 PM

Not yet, at least for the US. Congress has to approve it and that ain't gonna happen until after 2016.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 05 Oct 15 - 02:02 PM

TPP is a done deal? Dog help us all.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 04 Oct 15 - 08:25 PM

Hang gliders. Now, that's a fucked up concept. What could go wr


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Oct 15 - 07:38 PM

I found a fleece jacket, without logo, for about USD 25.00. On sale, of course. And I don't pay for stuff with a logo unless it's nonprofit like a museum, or if I really, really want it (like my Moose Drool cap). If some company wants me to advertise for them as a walking billboard they can provide the stuff for free and pay me to wear it.

Pricey depends upon what you want/need. I needed a jacket and I probably could have found one a little cheaper somewhere else. But I figure that you get what you pay for.

Bass Pro shops is about the same prices as Cabelas.

I'm not saying that Missoula, Montana is outdoorsy, but there's also a Bob Ward's Sporting Goods, Sports Authority, God knows how many fishing tackle shops, I gave up counting the hunting stores, and a couple of mountaineering places. Also boating and kayaks and bicycles and hang gliders and I don't know what all. You can hardly move a block without breathing some sort of fresh,outdoorsy air!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 04 Oct 15 - 07:22 AM

Many here are finding that Kabelaws has higher prices than the local guys. Kabelaws is about 2 km from me but I haven't been there yet. Bass Pro opens their new store this week so I might go to Kabelaws on the day that BP opens fer a gander.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Oct 15 - 07:20 AM

The Getaway is rollicking and frolicking and thriving and sleep-depriving. I am glad despite fatigue. I couldn't sustain it for a week, thugh.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Sir R., villain exraordinaire
Date: 04 Oct 15 - 01:51 AM

Checking in.   I'm in Mizala, as the GPS tells it. Tomorrow I will go to kabelaws to see about buying a jacket because I forgot mine.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: maeve
Date: 03 Oct 15 - 04:26 PM

Raising a glass to honor/honour those who keep Mom's candle lit in more ways than one. Have fun in Missoula, Rap. Get the music going at the Getaway, Amos. Hum a hummersong, gnu. Declut the clutted, Acme. Arise and shine, Mom.

Maeve


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Oct 15 - 07:31 PM

Okay, bright and early tomorrow I'm going to Missoula. I'll be gone a few days. You guys take care of Mom; I'll check in when I can.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Oct 15 - 02:21 PM

Although Idaho must worry about earthquakes, vulcanism, tornadoes, blizzards, drought, and a multitude of other things, we don't have to worry about hurricanes and tsunamis.

If a hurricane or tsunami affects Idaho we're all in a world of hurt and even moreso if it's a hurricane-driven tsunami or vice-versa. But soon enough, with the Cascadian Fault overdue to liquify the west coast from Yreka to Seattle and global warming raising the level of the Pacific, we may experience both any day now.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST, ^*^
Date: 02 Oct 15 - 12:11 PM

The hurricane itself may not hit, but it sounds like there is quite a backwash weather-wise. Stay dry, everyone.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Oct 15 - 11:32 AM

New Brunswick Will Wash Away!
Weather Alerts Out!!

CNS: Hurricane Joaquin changed its track overnight and will make landfall three meters north of the US/Canadian border early Sunday or perhaps Monday morning. Winds in excess of 200kmh and rains in excess of a meter per hour are to be expected.

The Prime Minister announced at 9 o'clock a.m. Atlantic Time that "New Brunswick will have to take its chances, even though it's predicted to wash away. We don't have the budget to help those herring chokers and fight terrorism in Canada at the same time."

The Province of Quebec and the state of Maine are said to be looking forward to additional beachfront properties.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 02 Oct 15 - 06:15 AM

Not necessarily... the hurricane track has changed. https://weather.gc.ca/hurricane/track_e.html


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Oct 15 - 09:42 PM

Flash floods, flashers, and flash mobs predicted at Getaway for this weekend.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Oct 15 - 08:33 AM

The last was written by Fylo T. Marnsworth way back in 1883. Fylo invented Smellyvision but went broke because no one would consider buying his recordings of Le Pétomane. In despair he took to pottery and made well over 200 misshapen jugs and jars before realizing he was actually meant for poetry, and the results of that are hardly less than well known. Fylo never married, but spent his life with his cats; when he died he left everything to them (did I mention he had inherited millions of rupees from an uncle with the East India Company?) but his will was broken by evil companions and his wealth dissipated in Denver's dissolute dives. Broken hearted, Fylo died of a heart attack in a charity ward for consumptive lepers in 1884 while visiting a friend. He is buried in Potter's Field at Wogharts in Blivetshire. As a side note, he possessed of both the Victoria Cross and the Medal of Honor, but both were taken from him and given to their rightful owners.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Sep 15 - 09:00 PM

Amos was smashed upon the rocks
That cooled his moonshine clear
So smashed was he his guitar he sold
The one he held so dear.

No more will his clear, dulcet, tones
Descend upon our ear
For he has sold his loved guitar
The one he held so dear.

No more his G-string shall he pluck
In tuning for nearly a year
For he has sold his one G-string
The one he held so dear.

No more a G-string, small and lace,
Will Amos, leering, wear,
It has gone where such things go --
And Amos wanders bare.

Yes, naked in the world goes he
Who once could fool an ear
With chords and frets and capos too
And minor fifths so sere.

And minor sevenths and bodhrans bold
The besotted wretch did break
For now he to West River doth hie
Which will look quite like a lake.

Water, water, everywhere!
And all the boards did swell!
Water, water, everywhere!
This rain can go to atch ee double toothpicks.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 30 Sep 15 - 01:31 PM

(I'll try to finish this later.) ? That doesn't rhyme.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Sep 15 - 11:22 AM

Amos was smashed upon the rocks
That cooled his moonshine clear
So smashed was he his guitar he sold
The one he held so dear.

No more will his clear, dulcet, tones
Descend upon our ear
For he has sold his loved guitar
The one he held so dear.

No more his G-string shall he pluck
In tuning for nearly a year
For he has sold his one G-string
The one he held so dear.

(I'll try to finish this later.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Sep 15 - 10:24 PM

A catawrack is a boat! Or is that a catawreck? Hmmm....

Getaway looks like it's gonna be a floataway this year. How can we send life jackets? I mean, seven inches of rain over the weekend?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: maeve
Date: 29 Sep 15 - 04:33 PM

Kindly allow this humble person who slept through the eclipse to assist Mom in arising from her eclipse-gazing hammock.

I never get to git to the Getaway, so at least I can be useful though not decorative. I'm more in the semblance of seawrack than catawracks, though I am overly familiar with them there things in a second hand- errr, second sight- no-lessee... I know about them things.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Sep 15 - 09:04 PM

Catawrack is a kind of tree, isn't it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Sep 15 - 05:47 PM

I didn't see it. I just wondered who did.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 28 Sep 15 - 10:49 AM

I seen it. Mighta been cool wasn't fer me catawracks.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Sep 15 - 10:14 AM

MOM!! MOM!!! Didja see the eclipse? Didjadidjadidja?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Sep 15 - 09:17 PM

I would like to see it, but there are houses and lights and trees east of me and it's too late to go somewhere else. Moonrise isn't for a bit yet anyway.

You all HAVE heard that there are some folks who believe that this is The End Of Days and that by morning we'll all be raptured? Or not, as the case may be. Personally I think that a giant coyote is going to eat the Moon, get sick to its little tummy, and throw it back up. This is actually part of the belief system of the Idaho Legion but you aren't required to subscribe to all of it because some of it's just plain silly.

Amos believes that the Earth is supported on the back of a giant turtle, which is on the back of another turtle, which is on the back of another turtle...in fact, it's turtles all the way down.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 27 Sep 15 - 03:39 PM

Starts at 9:11 here and goes for 5:11 hours. I might see a bit of it. It's SSW from me at the start and there are apartment buildings in that direction so ???

Have fun.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 Sep 15 - 01:14 PM

Whew - that oil tank episode sounds like a stunt in a scary movie. Or a slapstick comedy. Not something you actually want happening in your home.

MOM is going to stay up tonight to watch the eclipse so I'll set up both the telescope and the camera on tripods.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Sep 15 - 09:52 PM

Oh, thank you, Ebbie! You have saved Mom from a FWTD.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ebbie
Date: 26 Sep 15 - 02:21 PM

To the rescue she leaps.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Sep 15 - 08:52 PM

Would that I could go! I had hoped to, but circumstances and four porch columns that need replacing dictated that, alas!, I could not.

But what do I care? Getaway is nought but a weekend of drinking, brawling, wenching, singing, music, late nights, and all of those things that folk singers and their ilk are known for. There will almost certainly be the Annual Police Raid where tear gas, pepper spray, rubber bullets, water cannon, and flash-bangs will be used to break up the uncouth clots of card carrying conservatives, liberals, and mugwumps.

Once again, Mother will be forced to spend her butter and egg money to bail out Amos. He will promise never again to de-pants a policeman, and next year everything will happen all over again.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Sep 15 - 11:55 AM

Ah, farewell, farewell, my bags are packed
And I must go away
I leave for far-off lands, my loves,
Where the wilding banjos play.
Where voices are no strangers
And every voice has song
And all the hours are enjoyed
And nothing lasts too long.
And so farewell, for I am agwine
To make my fingers play
Beyond the snowcapped Rockies
To the East Coast Getaway!

Justin Caseit Happenz
Ballads of Escape
Damfool Tukov Rhuning, pubs
Glasgow, 1876


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Sep 15 - 12:22 AM

Some people must travel far afield to find small, cold comfort; better they had stayed at home and enjoyed the sunlight.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Sep 15 - 08:58 PM

I hope like hell the tank was empty when they started cutting on it! Probably was, but you can never tell about some people.

Amos, I apologize for mistaking "a gwine" for "agwine." Obviously you have a later dictionary than I. I wish, however, point out that gwine is a wine cellar management program written in perl, and for information on "a" I refer you to the repetition section at perdocs.perl.org.

On further investigation, however, I found that the expression "a gwine" in Old Meänkieli (Enontekiö dialect) refers to "the heroic though solitary copulatory acts of the [now extinct] Arctic warthog when stranded on a melting bit of an iceberg." I thought you'd want to know.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 24 Sep 15 - 06:53 PM

Of all the money that e'er I had
I've spent it in good company
And all the harm that e'er I've done
Alas it was to none but me
And all I've done for want of wit
To memory now I can't recall
So fill to me the parting glass
Good night and joy be with you all

Citations not required. If you don't know it.... bite me. Good night and joy be with you all.

OH! Yesterday was horrible! The fuckers who changed out Mum's oil tank? One was no bigger than a minute and the other gut was about 60. In order to get the ol tank up the basement stairs, they cut the tank in two with a Sawz-all. I was next door and it was FUCKIN LOUD at my house. I raced over. Mum was in hysterics trying to get her shoes on to get out of the house... scared to damn near death. I flicked the basement stairs light on an off rapidly and asked him to wait until I got Mum out of the house. Got her into my house, shut my windows... took a half to get her calmed and stop crying. There will be a Letter to the Editor about this suggesting that people enquire about the cutting of old tanks in their home before hiring a company to change out a tank.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Sep 15 - 02:41 PM

I didn't say I was an agwinist, silly Bookmanne. I said I was a gwine, which is an entirely different word from an entirely different root, viz., Indo-European gjinn, noun, "an act of heroism or accomplishment of such magnitude as to appear mystic or magical in its origins". I come from a long line of such acts.

Teaching your grandmother to suck eggs is an exercise in futility, mon vieux.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Sep 15 - 12:59 PM

Gwyn, Amos. You misspelled. Obviously then you are descended from Nell Gwyn, who often descended for Charles II of England. You're "a Gwyn" and not "agwine." "Agwine" is an old, old Anglo-Saxon verb meaning, well, it's a series of actions involving grease, a wine butt, several sheep, leather, and linked body piercings. "Agwine" is against the law in 200 countries of the world, and is always and everywhere punishable by "death with extreme malice." You don't want to be an agwinist.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Sep 15 - 11:24 AM

I leave for the Getaway tomorrow night, via visits in North Carolina and DC. I don't know what the case will be in future years, but this year Ima gwine.

Actually I have been agwine for along time, and am descended from a long, long line of gwines. Many of the gwines in my ancestral tree have been involved with major historical figures and incidents, such as the bombing of the Parsley Grade School boy's room plumbing and the discovery of cannabis in the new world. It wasn't really a new world, but it was really cannabis. Which made it look new.

So I have a lot of respect and affinity for those who have the courage to say "I'm agwine". These are the folks who make the world go around in various dimensions.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Sep 15 - 09:39 AM

Well, why not? I mean, no one else seems to want to.


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