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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Little Hawk 27 May 08 - 06:15 PM
Amos 27 May 08 - 04:52 PM
Little Hawk 27 May 08 - 04:43 PM
Acme 27 May 08 - 03:43 PM
Amos 27 May 08 - 03:41 PM
Amos 27 May 08 - 02:38 PM
Amos 27 May 08 - 12:50 PM
Little Hawk 27 May 08 - 12:47 PM
Rapparee 27 May 08 - 12:38 PM
MMario 27 May 08 - 12:04 PM
Little Hawk 27 May 08 - 12:01 PM
Acme 27 May 08 - 11:55 AM
Amos 27 May 08 - 11:33 AM
Amos 27 May 08 - 01:18 AM
Acme 27 May 08 - 12:22 AM
Little Hawk 26 May 08 - 10:31 PM
Janie 26 May 08 - 10:27 PM
Janie 26 May 08 - 10:25 PM
Amos 26 May 08 - 09:56 PM
Little Hawk 26 May 08 - 09:43 PM
Janie 26 May 08 - 09:31 PM
Little Hawk 26 May 08 - 09:21 PM
Acme 26 May 08 - 09:20 PM
Amos 26 May 08 - 09:19 PM
Little Hawk 26 May 08 - 07:48 PM
MMario 26 May 08 - 07:40 PM
Acme 26 May 08 - 02:39 PM
Acme 26 May 08 - 02:38 PM
Amos 26 May 08 - 02:23 PM
Amos 26 May 08 - 11:40 AM
Acme 26 May 08 - 11:16 AM
Little Hawk 26 May 08 - 09:18 AM
Rapparee 26 May 08 - 06:21 AM
Amos 26 May 08 - 12:53 AM
Janie 26 May 08 - 12:51 AM
Acme 26 May 08 - 12:14 AM
Amos 25 May 08 - 11:56 PM
Little Hawk 25 May 08 - 11:51 PM
Little Hawk 25 May 08 - 11:43 PM
Amos 25 May 08 - 11:40 PM
Little Hawk 25 May 08 - 11:35 PM
Amos 25 May 08 - 11:23 PM
Amos 25 May 08 - 08:14 PM
Acme 25 May 08 - 07:14 PM
Little Hawk 25 May 08 - 06:33 PM
Amos 25 May 08 - 04:14 PM
MMario 25 May 08 - 12:49 PM
Amos 25 May 08 - 12:11 PM
Amos 25 May 08 - 12:07 PM
Little Hawk 25 May 08 - 11:23 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 May 08 - 06:15 PM

You can ignore me if you wish, sir, but you cannot make me go away.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 May 08 - 04:52 PM

If you tell them they were for the cellar, they'll come and dig you a new one.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 May 08 - 04:43 PM

I am trying to reveal how I feel about morons and idiots like Shane, you silly bugger. Get a grip.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 May 08 - 03:43 PM

Don't have a cellar. Musta been for the garage.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 May 08 - 03:41 PM

I dunno--with Rapaire fresh out of gaol and Hack in the brig for sassing, I am beginning to worry about the moral fiber of the MOAB. IS there something about our constant focus on BS that might be corroding the moral sensibilities around here? Stilly, did you get your gro-lites for the cellar okay?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 May 08 - 02:38 PM

IS it just a kind of projection that leads good Hack to create characters wuith such, how to say, unbecoming personalities?

Or is he trying to reveal how he feels about us?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 May 08 - 12:50 PM

Mid-day EST is well past the yardarm in Clifden, you know. The brown stuff could already be flowing freely, accoutning for the prepositional miasma of his last post. It is fun to watch him become a leprechaun for a season, though. I am glad to see he has been let out of gaol, assuming he really was posting, and that from Clifden. On the Internet, it could always be a dog...



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 May 08 - 12:47 PM

Here is Shane's last post from the 85 Billion thread, in its entirety, unexpurgated and compleat:

"Rapaire is scairt! He has ran away to flippin' England and I am back in charge of this here thread, eh? Things are gettin' back to normle aroudn here now becoz the bolthole Rapaire got scairt off by me becos he knkows I would clean his clock and boot his flippin' ass right outta town if he dared to, like, shown his face. His day is OVER, man. OVER. Shane is back in charge, eh? I rule. I am the Chief. I ROCK.

- Shane "


I note that Shane got the country wrong, Rapaire, as you are in Ireland, not England. He's never been too strong on geography, but I'm surprised he made that specific mistake, because Shane's family background is Irish and he's proud of it! It must have just been inattention on his part. Maybe you will have the good fortune of meeting some of Shane's distant relatives on your visit to the Emerald Isle.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 May 08 - 12:38 PM

Yes, and right now he's in an Internet Cafe in Clifden, thinking on his dear sweet old Mom, who is gently rocking on the back porch amidst the lilacs.

Tomorrow, Navan or somewhere similar and the Brui na Boine. Back to Spidal tonight.

I HAVE THE BRAND NEW BOOK ON THE LIFE OF CHIEF O'NEILL OF CHICAGO, he of O'Neill's Irish Music and all that!! JUST published down in Dingle!

(I didn't expect to hear for me at all either.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 27 May 08 - 12:04 PM

He's a big boy - and he's in the Land of Guiness. I really didn't expect to hear from him at ALL; or maybe not until a couple days AFTER he gets back.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 May 08 - 12:01 PM

Shane says he has run away for good.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 May 08 - 11:55 AM

Don't you guys even CARE that Rapaire seems to have gone missing?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 May 08 - 11:33 AM

Otherwise, you can spend a week in the brig for sassing.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 May 08 - 01:18 AM

LH:

Tell you what, dumchuck--YOU drop and do fifty.

And when you've done that, report to the messhall for KP duty.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 May 08 - 12:22 AM

LH, I was trying to draw our bragadocchio Rapaire out with that line. I purposely did that line from the Croce song, not mentioning Superman's cape or Lone Ranger's mask so that maybe he would jump in and offer a first-hand account of having his own personal cape tugged or mask pulled off.

Didn't seem to work. He must be having a really good vacation business trip. Whatever.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 May 08 - 10:31 PM

Amos?

Drop and take 50! ;-) I'm gonna straighten you out, Mister, if I hafta kill you to do it. Yeah, I know...you hate me now...but you'll thank me some day for this.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 26 May 08 - 10:27 PM

Ah, Amos, it is good to see that chivalry is not dead.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 26 May 08 - 10:25 PM

It is the only time dramamine has ever failed me.

I promptly took 3 - count 'em -3 more and got loopy enough to go to sleep on the fiberglass bench behind the bridge cabin to avoid the embarrassment.

Not one of my finer moments.

I was in good company, however. Two fellow sufferers stand out in my memory. One was a pretty, young, Amish girl, in her immaculate grey dress, white apron, and bonnet of white netting. She was on her honeymoon. She was just as seasick, but demur and graceful in her distress, unlike this 'ol clodhopper of a hillbilly. The other was a man in his late 30's who had a son with him about the same age as my then 10 year old Sum Yung Sun. Both he and his son were very seasick. The man had served for 4 years in the Navy in the Pacific on small patrol boats not much bigger than the fishing boat we were on. He had never been seasick before.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 May 08 - 09:56 PM

You can say yuck, Little Hawk, but if you had been there you would have been honored. HONORED, you hear me?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 May 08 - 09:43 PM

Oh, yuck!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 26 May 08 - 09:31 PM

Want me to tell about the time I puked at the very tip of the bow of one of those big party fishing boats out on the edge of the Gulf Stream? My head, of course, was just upwind. The 50 fisherman along the rail that were downwind....well....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 May 08 - 09:21 PM

And don't piss into the wind either...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 May 08 - 09:20 PM

The words "don't spit in the wind" come to mind. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 May 08 - 09:19 PM

Yeah, yeah, I know -- it's all just fun until somebody gets their eye put out....



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 May 08 - 07:48 PM

I'm just funnin' with you, Amos. ;-) I know you love to say that word "sirrah" in that type of context.

I think Rapaire should know that Shane has been going all over Blind River and surrounding areas telling everyone who will listen that he has "scairt Rapaire clean out of the flippin' country". He is in his glory. He thinks Rapaire has fled North America in fear of what Shane might do to him if he got "aholt of him". Yes, the lad is boasting about it all the livelong day.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 26 May 08 - 07:40 PM

and only 31 posts to a balanced number - even if not a spinner.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 May 08 - 02:39 PM

23700.

It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood, where these things are as common as crabgrass.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 May 08 - 02:38 PM

We seem to be approaching another large number.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 May 08 - 02:23 PM

PART III

They were flying the turn to seven then,
You could hear those horses thud,
Lord, how the air was full of cries,
And flying sweat, and mud.
They were fighting hard for every yard,
Hot enough to burn off paint,
And the betting men were lookin' grim,
While the gals commenced to faint.

The ponies sweated, strived and strained,
As they thundered into the bend;
They had full three hunnert more to go,
Afore they saw the end.
Their eyes rolled wide, the hot foam flew,
As they hurtled past the stands.
And the muscles on their mighty necks
Rippled like iron bands.

Brown Derby ran like a beast possessed,
With a heart that could not fail.
And his jockey heard, like the drums of hell,
Bright Glim there, on his tail.
And back in third, jes' taking her time,
Was the shadow of Big Mom,
Eating the track with a long, slow stride,
Like a slowly ticking bomb.

The 'caster he was hollerin' loud
Over the old PA,
It was more a fearsome, awesome roar,
There wasn't too much he could say.
The storm of those mighty muscles flew
Like tornados under glass,
And the watchers chewed their nails, and prayed
And yelled, as they thundered past.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 May 08 - 11:40 AM

Oh, THAT post. I do apologize. By the time you accused me of using the word I had completely put my ind onto other things. But that was intentionally using the word for the exact purposes you say, so I really don't see what you are complaining about.


Rapaire is a in Dingle!! Glad he is alive oh.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 May 08 - 11:16 AM

MOM is so glad to finally hear from Rapaire. I bet he sent her some postcards. They won't arrive until after he gets home, though.

Seems a wacko in North Carolina, mentioned here briefly a week or two ago, has taken to complaining to mudcat management about s t a l k i n g (says I'm doing it--I'm spacing it so it doesn't appear in a search.) Woman is fu*king nuts. Gone round the bend. Apparently if we both end up on the same thread she thinks she is being attacked. Even if I was there first. Amazing.

Continue with the conversation. I'm just venting a little.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 May 08 - 09:18 AM

Amos! Your facade of scrupulous honesty and objectivity is slipping. You, sir, did indeed say "sirrah" to me. It is in your post on this thread of 25 May 08 - 11:23 PM. Scroll down and look. You frequently use that word when you are attempting to become high and mighty with others.

Drop and give me 30! (grin)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 May 08 - 06:21 AM

Dear Mom,

Here I am in a public Internet Cafe in Dingle. I've posted you some wonderful "tea" some of the folks here make in the hills. I hope you enjoy it.

Your fave rave kid,
R.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 May 08 - 12:53 AM

I guess we cross-posted. Glad you spotted where that identity was coming from. I might have known a movie was involved; I suppose I ma lucky it wasn't the Duke taking on Iwo Jima or something.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 26 May 08 - 12:51 AM

A (presumably) unmated male mockingbird has been singing his heart out all night for the last three mights. I'm thinking of printing out a copy of MMario's peonies to show him. How could he not fall in love with such a fair flower?

If that don't shut him up, I'll have to hunt up a slingshot.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 May 08 - 12:14 AM

I think Amos did just give LH one. . . digit, that is. . .

While you two are in watching movies and waving lace hankies about I've been out cleaning the garage. It was so cute. Did you know that MOM kept some of your baby toys? Those little wood and leather toys, some with quaint lead paint and strings for pulling them around the floor.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 May 08 - 11:56 PM

Sir Hawk, what are you ranting on about? I did not use the word, "sirrah", have no perfumed hanky, and only resort to traditional formalisms in order, occasionally, to chastise, reprimand or educate you, when you show need of such things. I do not know, just now, why you are acting out the long-dead ghost of some tin-hat drill instructor or perhaps a Chinese Red Youth community leader, but I assure you I will not drop, nor give you twenty, nor even give you one. So, if this bothers you, you may go piss up a rope.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 May 08 - 11:51 PM

Heh! Forgive me, Amos. I just finishing watching that movie "Mr Woodcock", and I got in the drill sergeant mode. I find it funny to do that because it's so utterly unlike anything I would ever wish to be.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 May 08 - 11:43 PM

And spare me the effete use of words like, "sirrah". What do you think you are anyway, the 5th Musketeer? Do you also have a perfumed lace hanky tucked flamboyantly in your shirt pocket which you pull out and wave now and then when making a particulary cogent point, this calculated to win the applause of the admiring throng that daily here witnesses your heroic monologues?

Drop again, and take 20. ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 May 08 - 11:40 PM

Fat chance, good sir Hawk. You are in no position to even pretend to impersonate a drill sergeant. You are out of shape, and a pinko socialist commie pacifist folkie.

Get to work, you shirker!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 May 08 - 11:35 PM

Amos....

Drop and take 10. And don't touch the floor with your knees!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 May 08 - 11:23 PM

And even if you are not ashamed of your parochialism, you should be embarassed at the paucity of high-quality BS you have been putting out lately. You are resting on your laurels, thinking you will always be held in high esteem for your generation of such wondrous things as BDiBR/Shane, Chongo, and the fictitious Shatner.

But you should bestir yourself, sirrah, for verily, I say unto you, the writing is on the wall, and no man may erase it by a jot or a tittle. Fame is fleeting, and gloria mundi has married someone else by now. Stir your weary, aging bones, and make your Mom proud!!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 May 08 - 08:14 PM

Little Hawk, you should be ashamed of your parochial bias. There are many here among us in the US who pronounce these words almost exactly the way you do, except without the "Eh" after each one. There are others who pronounce them with strong Persian, Korean, Formosan, French, Hispanic, German, Swiss or British accents. Somehow, you know, we manage to communicate all right anyway, without mocking each other. Eh?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 May 08 - 07:14 PM

Leo, early this afternoon I set up a Google Group for the Mudcatters who garden who have been discussing it on the current gardening thread, but no one else has joined yet. Just me. Do you want to join? Visit
http://groups.google.com/group/mudcat-gardeners and ask to join and I'll set you up. Members can invite other members, but I left it a private group that anyone can read.

I was looking for one place where we can all post our gardening photos and even each set up pages if we want, etc. It started because Bobert doesn't do digital or html pages and he sent me a couple of disks of some of his photos to post. I figured I'd rather put them at a collective mudcat place than on my photobucket pages.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 May 08 - 06:33 PM

"Lookit, Herman! Flars!" (delightful James Thurber cartoon of yesteryear, as powerful and aggressive woman drags on somewhat beaten-down and reluctant looking husband's arm, ecouraging him to join in her delight over the suddenly discovered presence of some flowers)

Some other dreadful Americanisms of that sort:

"tare" (terror)
"meer" (mirror)
"Yerp" (Europe)
"Tronna" (Toronto)
"Wadder" (spoken through the nose...means 'water')
"Feb-you-wary" (means February)
"ex-cape" (escape)
"Ar-tick" (arctic)
"irregardless" (regardless)
"disorientated" (disoriented)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 May 08 - 04:14 PM

Flars!! Mom, MM is raisin FLARS!! Lookee!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 25 May 08 - 12:49 PM

Hi Mom! thought you'd like to see some of my gardens.

look here


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 May 08 - 12:11 PM

In other news in the world, science seems to discover that the past may be changed by what you choose to measure in the present.

"ThereŐs no way around it: The nature of light seems different depending on how itŐs observed. Light can act like a particle or wave, and all shades of gray in between. Now, physicists have the most dramatic demonstration yet that this range of behaviors between wave and particles really is unavoidable, and that light itself doesnŐt know what it is while itŐs propagating".

This is an intriguing notion, because it opens the door to the understanding that time itself, which we depend on completely to keep everything from happening at once, and to reassure us that an object is the same thing it was, and several other certitudes of human existence, may be in fact only the biggest of Big Lies ever told.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 May 08 - 12:07 PM

Well, I am greatly relieved t hear that, M. Hawk. I would hate to think of your body wasting away.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 May 08 - 11:23 AM

That was an outrageous typo when I said that I was suffering from anorexia! LOL!!!

What I meant was that I am suffering from "amnesia". ;-)


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