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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Acme 31 Oct 06 - 10:52 AM
Acme 31 Oct 06 - 10:52 AM
MMario 31 Oct 06 - 10:43 AM
Amos 31 Oct 06 - 10:41 AM
JennyO 31 Oct 06 - 10:35 AM
Snuffy 31 Oct 06 - 10:32 AM
MMario 31 Oct 06 - 10:28 AM
Amos 31 Oct 06 - 10:26 AM
JennyO 31 Oct 06 - 10:16 AM
Acme 31 Oct 06 - 10:11 AM
Acme 31 Oct 06 - 10:09 AM
MMario 31 Oct 06 - 09:45 AM
Bunnahabhain 31 Oct 06 - 09:40 AM
JennyO 31 Oct 06 - 09:24 AM
Amos 31 Oct 06 - 09:15 AM
MMario 31 Oct 06 - 09:07 AM
Rapparee 31 Oct 06 - 08:55 AM
Mick Pearce (MCP) 31 Oct 06 - 07:35 AM
Mick Pearce (MCP) 31 Oct 06 - 07:34 AM
John MacKenzie 31 Oct 06 - 05:48 AM
Rapparee 30 Oct 06 - 09:09 PM
Bunnahabhain 30 Oct 06 - 08:14 PM
Rapparee 30 Oct 06 - 03:15 PM
Amos 30 Oct 06 - 03:09 PM
MMario 30 Oct 06 - 03:01 PM
Acme 30 Oct 06 - 02:50 PM
Acme 30 Oct 06 - 02:49 PM
Amos 30 Oct 06 - 02:17 PM
Rapparee 30 Oct 06 - 02:05 PM
Bunnahabhain 30 Oct 06 - 01:13 PM
MMario 30 Oct 06 - 01:11 PM
Amos 30 Oct 06 - 01:06 PM
Amos 30 Oct 06 - 11:18 AM
JennyO 30 Oct 06 - 11:14 AM
Bunnahabhain 30 Oct 06 - 10:12 AM
JennyO 30 Oct 06 - 09:11 AM
Rapparee 30 Oct 06 - 09:01 AM
Bunnahabhain 30 Oct 06 - 08:29 AM
MMario 30 Oct 06 - 08:13 AM
Acme 30 Oct 06 - 12:18 AM
Rapparee 29 Oct 06 - 10:24 PM
JennyO 29 Oct 06 - 10:19 PM
Rapparee 29 Oct 06 - 09:43 PM
Amos 29 Oct 06 - 09:33 PM
Rapparee 29 Oct 06 - 09:18 PM
Acme 29 Oct 06 - 09:17 PM
Amos 29 Oct 06 - 08:18 PM
Amos 29 Oct 06 - 03:25 PM
Amos 29 Oct 06 - 02:55 PM
Bill D 29 Oct 06 - 02:08 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 10:52 AM

Ready to launch two posts.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 10:52 AM

Tried to open both (boy, did that take a long time!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 10:43 AM

I remember that place! Talk about false advertising, I don't think they had more then 8 million toppings at best.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 10:41 AM

Breathe in....breathe out...good for your souls,
And also recycling Nature's doughnut holes.


Excerpt from the Dairy Cream Bananda Gita, recorded by Hindi temple maidens in kohl on draperies from the Temple of the Ten Million Toppings, Hindu Kness, circa 390 B.C.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 10:35 AM

Currants are okay in their place, but I like my doughnut holes au naturel.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Snuffy
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 10:32 AM

Does it really matter the currant count is 8113 or 14776? It's a heck of a lot of currants - far too many for me to eat You could fill a whole slew of doughnut holes with those.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 10:28 AM

The astro-physicist had a dog; that duck-dog's name was Gluon!
G - L - U - O - N!
G - L - U - O - N!
G - L - U - O - N!

and Gluon was the duck-dog!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 10:26 AM

Seems to me if even an elephant can recognize it self in a mirror, Mom oughta be able to as well!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 10:16 AM

Bunnahabhain said Unless you mis-typed 14700 for 14600

Nope, I may have said I am confuserated, but not that much. Look back 20 and 19 posts before I made that post and you will see that both Amos and Rapaire referred to that number in verse, and we can't all be that confuserated - at least I doubt it.

Maybe it's all Gluon's fault. When in doubt - blame the duck-dog!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 10:11 AM

It is probably something to do with this mirror image that isn't letting that trick work. As long as there is one that isn't loading and one that is, it isn't going to reset itself. My guess, anyway.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 10:09 AM

Okay. I also downloaded the entire thing. Mom, you're kind of heavy.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 09:45 AM

a hiking holiday in Bulgaria actually sounds rather nice. I was watching an ice dancing cometition last night and the winning couple were from Bulgaria.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 09:40 AM

Unless you mis-typed 14700 for 14600, but I never claim to actually know whats going on. Even when I do, all it results in is people asking me too many questions.

Google has given us hiking holidays in Bulgaria and Galilee. it's more confused than we are...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 09:24 AM

I've noticed something interesting. It says Mom has 8112 posts now (8113 after I post) but if you click on any of the other 293 pages, the count in the address bar changes to 14683 (14684 after this post). It also shows up that way if you click on the number to get here instead of the d.

There are 294 pages listed. If you assume that 293 have 50 posts and 1 has 33 (which it does), that adds up to 14683. Trouble is, I claimed post 14700 76 posts ago, so the count should be 14776, not 14683. So we may have actually lost 93 posts. That may not have only just happened now - I'm wondering if we lost those posts some time ago and didn't notice?

I hope Mom isn't as confuserated as I am.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 09:15 AM

She already sent you some...didn't you see them?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 09:07 AM

HI mom. it's halloween. Are you gonna make doughnut holes again this year?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 08:55 AM

Nothing fazes Mom. Mom is Numero Uno! Just because her scale's busted doesn't mean she's not all there.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Mick Pearce (MCP)
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 07:35 AM

But as count is now 8108 it obviously doesn't reset it!

Mick


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Mick Pearce (MCP)
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 07:34 AM

I was about to do what Giok just did in the interest of the fragile mental health of those worrying. Current count stands at 8107.

Mick


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 31 Oct 06 - 05:48 AM

Well I done downloaded the whole Mom, and it took a while even on BB.
Now we give her some artificial resussiwotsit.
Giok


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 09:09 PM

Oh fer...Mom ain't debased. Dis is de base.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 08:14 PM

You can't just go about debasing Mom like that, it's not right.


Besides, with what we've already done to her, you'd need to try alot harder than that!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 03:15 PM

Since 14,700 in base 12 is about 8,610, Mom must be calculating in about base 12.3 or so. Y'all figure it out, if you'd like.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 03:09 PM

Well, Maybe Mom is pretending not to be all there as a learning experience for the kids. D'ja ever think of that? Huh? So we can see what it might be like to have a Mom who was only half-there, and then realize how lucky we were to have one who keeps being more and more there all along?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 03:01 PM

definately not


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 02:50 PM

Okay, so I can't read. Make that 8100. Or not. Not, I think, is the answer. The old posts are there, the count is just incorrect.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 02:49 PM

9000 again-- or not


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 02:17 PM

So now we are only one away from 8100 although we have already passed 14000. Hmmmm....I am getting dizzy.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 02:05 PM

Mom's all here. It just doesn't seem like it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 01:13 PM

I think everyone knows where to find Mom, even if she's not all there at the moment...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 01:11 PM

That explains all the calls for Mrs. M'mbombombo of Nigeria.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 01:06 PM

Still with the wrong number!! No wonder Mom's not hearing from her friends!! They have her wrong number listed.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 11:18 AM

No. Fish tanks aren't much use in fighting land mammals. The weapons don't work well out of the water, and air is much too thin for their treads to get purchase on.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 11:14 AM

I've got a fish tank here - but I don't suppose that would help much...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 10:12 AM

Even a septic tank would do. Drop it from several hundred feet above their offices, it should have quite an impact, especially if full....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 09:11 AM

Wish I could lose weight that quickly!

Meanwhile, in the Discworld...

Nanny Ogg: "How come you're in the palace guard, Casanunda?"
Casanunda: "Soldier of fortune takes whatever jobs are going, Mrs. Ogg."
Nanny Ogg: "But all the rest of 'em are six foot tall and you're-- of the shorter persuasion."
Casanunda: "I lied about my height, Mrs. Ogg. I'm a world-famous liar."
Nanny Ogg: "Is that true?"
Casanunda: "No."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 09:01 AM

Centurion? Abrams? Sherman? Patton? Mark II? T-70? Panzer? Tiger? Lee? MBT-60?

Flame-throwing? HE and HEAT only, or also flechette-firing? Do you want the machine guns independent or to move in concert with the main gun? Overpressured or aren't you worried about chemical warfare? Reactive armor or not? Diesel or gas? Reciprocating engine or turbine?

Be specific, man! We can't help you if you only specific "a tank"!

Mom will supply 'most anything to her kids, but ya gotta be specific!! Why, you could end up with a septic tank and that's probably not what you want!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 08:29 AM

Most people would be happy to lose a few years of weight gain so easily, but we just complain.

Back to war with the council. Anybody got a tank I can borrow?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 08:13 AM

Mom's lying about here weight! Never thought I'd see the day. After all the times she's told us "Honesty is the best policy" and "If I ever catch you lying to me!"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 Oct 06 - 12:18 AM

I had to dig way down my personal page to find my "I Read it in the Newspaper" thread (which it now looks like I started after ages with Foolestroupe at the head of it). At least it was there!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Oct 06 - 10:24 PM

Not at all! It means you can actually do it again!

How often do you get the chance to do something over? And the post isn't lost -- it's in there, amidst the 293 pages of posts!

Drink in celebration!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 29 Oct 06 - 10:19 PM

Rapaire, "gee-doubleoh-en-ee" spells goone. I do like the goones, but I don't think Mom was playing with them :-)

So after all that poetry and effort, it turns out that my 14,700th post was empty and meaningless. I am devastated! I might need to go and have another drink. Oh, the pain.....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Oct 06 - 09:43 PM

I have also noticed that other threads, present BF, are absent AF.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Oct 06 - 09:33 PM

Well done, Brave Rapaire. Thanks for plucking her soul back from peril and the Unknown!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Oct 06 - 09:18 PM

Amos, I ain't braggin' but here's the story.

Right after the upgrade I got into the 'Cat and naturally went lookin' for Mom.

Amos, she wasn't there!!! True! Vanished, gone!

I quickly went to my personal page and found that yes, long ago I'd "traced" Mom. I clicked on, and VOILA! Up came Mom, but listing far too few postings.

Well, when I opened 'er up there were 293 pages although I seemed to remember 295 BF (Before Fix). I figgered that was close and posted.

She's been around ever since.

But she was GONE, dude, gee-doubleoh-en-ee GONE. Like I said, I ain't braggin', but I'm right glad I was able to pull her back from the light.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 29 Oct 06 - 09:17 PM

Think of all of the firsts we might end up doing all over. As an example, pretty soon we'll have a number that resonates in the annals of computer history.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Oct 06 - 08:18 PM

Aw, man, I think Mom's feelin; low since the upgrade. I try to talk to her and all she says is, "Oh boy! Have THEY got the wrong number!!!"


Whassup wid dat?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Oct 06 - 03:25 PM

From a long-lost Southern gentlemen, who wrote poems:

"Wait, wait-as though a finger were placed to lips
The first star petals timidly in what
Is not yet darkness. That audacity
Will be rewarded soon. In this transitional light,
While cinders in the west die, the world
Has its last blooming. Let your soul

Be still. All day it has curdled in your bosom
Denatured by intrusion of truth or lie, or both.
Lay both aside, nor debate their nature. Soon,
While not even a last bird twitters, the last bat goes.
Even the last motor fades into distance. The promise
or moonrise will dawn, and slowly, in all fullness, the moon

Will dominate the sky, the world, the heart,
In white forgiveness."

R.P. Warren


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Oct 06 - 02:55 PM

Bill,

There is nothing infinite about the people who post here, except the natural spiritual infinity that resides within each of us. Nor is there anything simian about any of them, except the 99.8% of their DNA which we share with the other branches of the chimp family. Once you come to understand the power of True BS, you will realize that this apparently chaotic concatenation of chaff is actually the symphonic realization of greatness in its purest form, and that to one who has traveled the road, All Knowledge is BS, and All BS is Truth.

These postulates will not make sense to one who has not traveled The Road. They are perceptions that come as the result of a Passage, a hero's journey through the Veil of Plausible Rationaity.


(And THEN he looked up and said calmly...)

"Monkeys disguised as people climb over the stockade, flapdoodling amongst the provisions and chittering under moonrise. Mist curls through the gunports, the flintlocks are sparkling in the moonlight, but their pans are moist with night dew, and they will not fire. Squirrels have eaten the fuses, the powder room has been devastated by ducks, the pikes eaten through by roving beavers, and the scabbards grown shut with lichen nourished by night air.

Outside, the stars are trapped by tall lodgepines, freezing the courses of time; a distant rumble announces that the walls of the creek are falling in.

Only the boulders can stil carry a tune, their notes unheard by men whose ears cannot resonate to so deep a scale. The bones of the earth smile, soaking down the redolent moisture from the strange passages above them -- the climate on their roof, meaning so much to those who walk on the surface, is a transient atmospheric to them. The bones are concerned with knowing other things, resting deep under the green plains and wet rivercourses, pondering a different way of space, a different meaning of time.

Out among the forest shadows, as the moon crawls into the pinetops among her sister stars, stands a glistening dark form, a savage of wilderness home born, walking without weapon or tools, he bear-talker, squirrel-tamer, the singer of pine cones, he who hears the bones singing, forest-walker and river-minded, world-native.

He knows the decays that are bringing the fortress to a standstill, because he has planned them. The lichen, the ducks, and the squirrels are his favors. In the night breeze, under shadowing arms of pine, stands he so, hearing night talk to the very bones of his planet. He is naked, resilient, glistening with soil-damp, gently formed like riverstone. Deep in his chest, born from fire and rain, comes up a song, which he believes will sing forever. Thus, fading among predawn shadows, has he built a stage for morning to play upon.

He smiles and turns along an invisible trail toward the far hills, and vanishes among the humming bark-heavy pines, into a forest of sweet causes, dark promises, whispering branches and moonlit shadows.

He is not tamed, for he lives in places where taming has never gone. He walks like a forest whisper, owning each brambled niche and open clearing, along with the ants, mice, and lynxes of the forest, and he cannot lie."


Leave your fine mathematics,
Leave your poetry, too
Walk away from the notions
You've presented as You;
Banish all preconceptions,
And your mind starts to pale;
When it sees you are bound for
The Wilderness Trail.

Turn away from the icons,
You have held for too long;
Cast off every image
Used to make others Wrong;
Bid farewell to fond formulas --
You have run out of bail;
And your time is beginning
On the Wildrness Trail.

The trailhead is near you,
Not more than a day;
But as you love your comfort.
Turn away, turn away!
Let your heart keep its Answers;
Let your eyes keep their scales.

For there's nothing but Change
On the Wilderness Trail

For there's nothing but Change
On the Wilderness Trail.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bill D
Date: 29 Oct 06 - 02:08 PM

There must be something worthwhile in that lot!

"if an infinite number of monkeys...."


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