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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Pete Jennings 23 Dec 13 - 06:59 AM
gnu 23 Dec 13 - 04:53 AM
Acme 23 Dec 13 - 01:07 AM
Rapparee 22 Dec 13 - 08:25 PM
GUEST,gnuonlaptop 22 Dec 13 - 08:01 PM
GUEST,gnu 21 Dec 13 - 04:47 PM
GUEST 21 Dec 13 - 04:39 PM
Amos 21 Dec 13 - 02:02 PM
Ebbie 21 Dec 13 - 11:54 AM
Rapparee 21 Dec 13 - 10:36 AM
GUEST 21 Dec 13 - 10:15 AM
Pete Jennings 21 Dec 13 - 09:22 AM
gnu 21 Dec 13 - 07:07 AM
Amos 21 Dec 13 - 12:13 AM
Rapparee 20 Dec 13 - 09:05 PM
gnu 20 Dec 13 - 08:21 PM
Pete Jennings 20 Dec 13 - 12:47 PM
Ebbie 20 Dec 13 - 11:17 AM
GUEST,The Galactic Overlord's Evil Twin 20 Dec 13 - 08:22 AM
Pete Jennings 20 Dec 13 - 06:26 AM
gnu 20 Dec 13 - 03:02 AM
Amos 19 Dec 13 - 10:16 PM
Rapparee 19 Dec 13 - 09:09 PM
gnu 19 Dec 13 - 06:27 PM
Acme 19 Dec 13 - 05:25 PM
gnu 19 Dec 13 - 01:11 PM
Pete Jennings 19 Dec 13 - 12:34 PM
Rapparee 19 Dec 13 - 11:25 AM
Rapparee 19 Dec 13 - 12:29 AM
Amos 19 Dec 13 - 12:00 AM
gnu 18 Dec 13 - 09:27 PM
Rapparee 18 Dec 13 - 09:09 PM
Acme 18 Dec 13 - 03:21 PM
gnu 18 Dec 13 - 10:38 AM
Rapparee 18 Dec 13 - 09:18 AM
gnu 18 Dec 13 - 06:46 AM
Amos 18 Dec 13 - 03:45 AM
Rapparee 17 Dec 13 - 09:54 PM
gnu 17 Dec 13 - 02:29 PM
gnu 17 Dec 13 - 01:33 PM
Pete Jennings 17 Dec 13 - 12:55 PM
Acme 17 Dec 13 - 12:41 PM
Rapparee 17 Dec 13 - 10:11 AM
Rapparee 17 Dec 13 - 10:08 AM
Pete Jennings 17 Dec 13 - 06:26 AM
gnu 17 Dec 13 - 06:17 AM
Rapparee 16 Dec 13 - 10:01 PM
Amos 16 Dec 13 - 07:49 PM
gnu 16 Dec 13 - 01:30 PM
Ebbie 16 Dec 13 - 11:48 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 23 Dec 13 - 06:59 AM

A red-nosed American Staffordshire Terrier, SRS? Red-nosed? Does she have a tendency to go AWOL on Christmas Eve?!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 23 Dec 13 - 04:53 AM

Freezing rain approacheth. Time to do my Kissmeass shopping.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 23 Dec 13 - 01:07 AM

Hey, Pete, I have an American Staffordshire terrier. Wonderful smart sweet dog. Looks kind of like the one on that page - red and white with a red nose and white feet and chest. She was an injured stray big pup, unaltered (ears are natural - such lovely expressive ears!) She smiles (literally - wrinkles her nose and shows her teeth as she wags happily). She's probably break the Galactic Overlord's kneecaps by wagging her tail so hard in his presence.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Dec 13 - 08:25 PM

Lookee here, gnu. Why don't you take the Codiac out to the Monkey Town aireyport and fly to Torono? From there you can fly to Salt Lake City and then take the bus up and visit me. Or you can fly the whole way and I'll pick you up at the Poky aireyport. Either way I'll put the kettle on and have some cod and taters fer ya.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,gnuonlaptop
Date: 22 Dec 13 - 08:01 PM

Back in business.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,gnu
Date: 21 Dec 13 - 04:47 PM

What?! I did NOT toss my own cookie!

Sounds kinda sexual. Sorry for saying that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 21 Dec 13 - 04:39 PM

Light er up, buttercup!

Nah... I won't explain. It's obvious.

Well... maybe not. Hmmmm...

Here's what ahm sayin...

Ahm sayin... give er all she'll suffer n don't back off til she breaks b'y!

Apologies to Buddy Wasisname and the Other Fellers.

Ye never heard a them lads? Me zon, me zon! Gits ye arse onta yer u tube n git atter eh! Laff a minute eh.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Dec 13 - 02:02 PM

Izzity Wuzz was out for a buzz
Or a thrill-ride in some new identity.
He wanted like heck to have an effect
He was bored with endless serenity.


So Izzity thought well, and he mustered a spell
To make Something––and thought he could see it!
It was lovely and bright, and it tasted all right
So the bugger decided to Be it.

Now being a Something was all very well,
It certainly added Dimension
But some other Being tried to Be it as well,
And Izzy felt some apprehension

It was grounds for Resistance, he decided at once,
And along with Resistance, Desire
And the sad combination of feeling and force
Soon had Izzy tangled in fire.

He quickly lost track of the Something's own source
And reckoned the cause was worth fighting
Without realizing he was fighting himself
And the fire was all his igniting!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ebbie
Date: 21 Dec 13 - 11:54 AM

I agree with Gnu- I would prefer that snow go 'out' freeze-drying, rather than sink into boggy, knee-deep slush from rain. It is one time, however, when I like the fact that we don't get MUD with it- Juneau doesn't have enough top soil for that to be a problem.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Dec 13 - 10:36 AM

Wimpy Canucks! Can't take little snow. Aw, poor babies.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 21 Dec 13 - 10:15 AM

10cm snow, 3mm rain, 5cm ice pellets, a little snow on that. Tomorrow, 20cm snow. Monday ~ 3cm/ice pellets/snow. All on top of 60+cm as of yesterday.

=

MESS!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 21 Dec 13 - 09:22 AM

The rain in the UK tends to be water, which only makes things wet, rather than make a mess.

What the heck does it rain where you are?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 21 Dec 13 - 07:07 AM

The rain today is gonna make an awful mess.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Dec 13 - 12:13 AM

Who, who, who, WHO LET THE DOGS OUT!

I am sure it was Rapparree. He is the devil's own stepson when it comes to raising hell and causing trouble. If you don't believe me just go to his first post on this thread and come forward reading each post up to now, and you'll see. Nothing but trouble, and that starts with T and that rhymes with Pee and that stands for Rapparree. 'Course you have tyo modulate the key a little, but it does.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Dec 13 - 09:05 PM

Every mornin' at seven o'clock
There were twenty-four terriers a-pissing on my block....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 20 Dec 13 - 08:21 PM

Fried terriers and eggs? BEAST!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 20 Dec 13 - 12:47 PM

Staffies can be great dogs if properly trained but can be right little buggers if not, especially when it comes to Galactical Overlord's Ugly Twins. Have 'em for breakfast.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ebbie
Date: 20 Dec 13 - 11:17 AM

My porcelain pup is a poodle, not Staffordshire.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,The Galactic Overlord's Evil Twin
Date: 20 Dec 13 - 08:22 AM

Why, my next "acquisition" will be Staffordshire. It will complete my collection of porcelain -- and those who will continue to make it for me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 20 Dec 13 - 06:26 AM

Sly grin, Rap? Yer've got no idea. However, comma, if one of yer Universalities includes Staffordshire, I'll buy you a drink for Christmas...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 20 Dec 13 - 03:02 AM

I'm A Believer.

Hey... where are the LHs?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Dec 13 - 10:16 PM

Just as well. Either would have been useless.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Dec 13 - 09:09 PM

A True Believer would dance around without worrying about a little snow. It didn't stop your neolithic ancestors, did it? It didn't stop the Celts, did it? It doesn't stop the mythical "Pats" does it?

As to how I pulled that little trick off I shall only say, with a sly grin, that I exist in many Universes of which you are unaware. (Please note that I did not end that last sentence with either a preposition or a proposition.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 19 Dec 13 - 06:27 PM

Apparently, 0:00:00h does not exist in Max's universe.

In my universe, it's Happy Winter Solstice on Saturday at 13:11h. I usually dance naked around my backyard maple tree in celebration but, seeing as to how I would have to shovel a shitload of snow, I may have to forego it this year as I have just today slipped twice on ice and slush and angered BOTH Satanic nerves. Hurts like hell! Besides, the neighbours are Baptists and they frown on such pagan rites. And, so does little gnu... but he's just prejudicial about the cold and withdrwaws into himself.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 19 Dec 13 - 05:25 PM

That is a good trick!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 19 Dec 13 - 01:11 PM

He's a warclock.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 19 Dec 13 - 12:34 PM

Hey Rap, how'd d'you manage to post your last post (11.25AM) later than the previous one (12.29AM)? You got a secret time machine?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Dec 13 - 11:25 AM

Ah, Mother. No one cares, and today I'm of to the VA in SLC for a C&P tomorrow. The weather down there is supposed to be frightful. If I make it I'll try to post again this evening after a nice dinner at the Bombay House.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Dec 13 - 12:29 AM

Yeah! Ante up that status quo so I can see it and double.

Once upon a time, a long time ago, a chap from Mexico was attending the undergrad college I went to. Now at the time I moved in an interesting crowd -- they were interested in partying, drinking, and generally having fun. Anyway, Jose (I'll call him that) had two quarts of homemade tequila sent up to him by one of his friends on his father's ranchero. He mentioned it, and the coming weekend was set for a trip to the camp for tequila swigging and poker.

When the three others (including my late brother, who spoke fluent Spanish) arrived, they hauled the beaten up old table out to the middle of the room, helped themselves to some tequila and announced it was good, and said, "Awright, let's play cards!" Naturally, no one wanted to play with anyone else;s deck and finally an acceptable deck was created out of three separate decks. Jose admired the profanity.

Then someone stabbed a massive Bowie knife into the table and said, "I wand an honest game, by God!" At that, move knives, were jammed into the table, lead pipes appeared, revolvers, chains, machetes, nail-studded clubs and other playthings started piling up on the table. Finally, a 12 gauge shotgun was placed on the top of the pile. Jose was white, he had no idea what was going on, and at that point the others broke down laughing. Jose saw the joke, and the card party progressed through the night, Jose only skinning them for most of their money. The next afternoon they loaded all the crap back into the car and headed for home, the hangovers being then at a level where they decided that they would indeed live.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Dec 13 - 12:00 AM

ALl I wished was that their wives be thrifty; if you don't have one, then she can't, and you will have to do it yourself. Back to the status quo ante, everyone! On the double!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 18 Dec 13 - 09:27 PM

A wife? I missed that. But, I will gladly offer if you are so inclined. I am ken on hookin up with a good lookin intelligent woman. Of course, you would have to become a Canuck and you would have to wait until the snowstorm is over come April or so.... then, skeeters and blackflies await. Perhaps we could be intrnUt spouses? I would be thrilled. And saddened at your loss.... of sanity.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Dec 13 - 09:09 PM

Texas allows that sort of thing now? W must be having a coronary, not to mention all of those mega-church dudes.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 18 Dec 13 - 03:21 PM

I saw LH on facebook the other day and told him that MOM misses him.

So you think I need a wife, Amos?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 18 Dec 13 - 10:38 AM

Gnarly!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Dec 13 - 09:18 AM

Ja. Mein uncle Hermann fought a mensur vid him vhen dey were in schule togetehr. Mein uncle, not beink Zorro, carved der entire vorks of Heinrich on his heinie.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 18 Dec 13 - 06:46 AM

Raps right. WHAT was I thinkin?!

That there Gottfried's quite the guy eh?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Dec 13 - 03:45 AM

HUrrah for Mom, Hurrah for Rapp
HUrrah for fifty thousand posts of pap!
Hurrah for Gnu, the Almost CHosen
Whose gonads seem to've gotten frozen!
Hurrah for Stilly, Queen of Nexus
Who orders insights big as Texas
Hurrah for missing Hawk the Smallen
Who by the wayside now has fallen.
My their lives be rich, their wives be thrifty
And their posts arrive at thousands fifty.

Gottfried Wanderlust, Third Duckling of Lichtenstamps
Carved by pen-knife in a restroom wall on the occasion of his graduating from his baccalaureate program in the late summer of 1853, at Heidelberg


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Dec 13 - 09:54 PM

gnu, no! Say it wasn't so! Tell me you weren't thinking. Please. Don't do it or you'll end up like Amos or worse.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 17 Dec 13 - 02:29 PM

I was thinkin just t'other day... if ya take viagra, do ya have a GMO?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 17 Dec 13 - 01:33 PM

A little reminiscing.

The Great King khandu started this thread with these immortal words...

"Another brainstorm of mine, inspired by Tweed, Spaw, Carol the Sailor and their elk."

Obviously a little mixed up in animule family classification but, little did I know I would have been called perspirational by his wise and gracious Majesty.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 17 Dec 13 - 12:55 PM

Alas, poor Hamlet, I knew him not.

(Well, it's a start, ook! ook!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Dec 13 - 12:41 PM

My goodness, this is a long, long thread, innit? Are we running out of steam? Or is the supply of BS in the universe, waiting only to be filtered into these symbolic chains by our flashing fevered fingers, fundamentally infinite?

We are fulfilling the role of all of those monkeys locked in a room with typewriters, eventually tapping out the complete works of Shakespeare. Some filtration required.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Dec 13 - 10:11 AM

gnu, the Idaho Legion is working hard to find out who THEY are. Don't worry, the Bureau of Finding Things Out (BFTO) will find out.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Dec 13 - 10:08 AM

Songwriter, perhaps:

Good King Frankenstein looked out
On his feets uneven
While the sno lay round about
Slushy and quite riven.
Brightly shone the moon that day
Tho' the King was cruel
When a poor man came in sight
He was quite a fo-oo-l.
"Bring me booze and please don't whine!
Bring me lots of livers!
Me and him will have a time
Eating horse's wi-i-thers."

That there is copyrited, so don't you go stealing it and singing it all over the place for money unless you give me 90% of the take.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 17 Dec 13 - 06:26 AM

Ey up, me duck, Rap's turning into Songwronger!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 17 Dec 13 - 06:17 AM

If THEY is any more than a delusion, who be THEY?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Dec 13 - 10:01 PM

Amos, not only are we nearing the 50,000th post, but we are also nearing the 1,000th page.

Have you ever heard infinity described as a hotel with all the rooms full but there is always a room available? Oh, sure, the quality of the rooms can vary from a set of rusted box springs, a thundermug, and a fly-specked single bulb to the most lavish suite you can imagine. But a room is always available.

So it is with BS. The quality can vary considerably, but BS goes on forever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever, ad nauseam.

Just consider gnu's obsession with the New England Patriots. That's pure BS -- not very good BS, but the pure stuff, because anyone with a lick of reality knows that there is no such American football team as the New England Patriots. He calls them "Pats", of course, but he's talking about an imaginary football team. In point of fact, I should point out that there is no such game as "American football" either. No NFL, no goalposts, no Superbowel, no touchdowns, no field goals, nope, none of it. What you see on television or "on the field" is animation or animatronics/holography created to keep the unwashed masses entranced while THEY do THEIR unholy work.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Dec 13 - 07:49 PM

My goodness, this is a long, long thread, innit? Are we running out of steam? Or is the supply of BS in the universe, waiting only to be filtered into these symbolic chains by our flashing fevered fingers, fundamentally infinite?

Inquiring minds want to know...

Little Hawk, you have been too long away. If you come back this is your welcome back present.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 16 Dec 13 - 01:30 PM

Ebbie... hahahahaaa!

My back is baaaaad and has knotted muscles and I still gotta shovel out the bed of my truck. Thank goodieness it was a fluffy snow and not that wet heavy crap we usually get with first few storms of the season. But, the absolute worst thing about yesterday was the two pass interference NON-calls on the second and third last plays of the game... I had the Pat's on a tie at 3.35. I nailed the other 5 games. I may write a Goddamn letter! "Are you shittin me? Are you fuckin BLIND?. Everybody saw it! You were standin right there! *I* SAW it and I am in New Fuckin Brunswick watchin it on a little TV screen!!! Why don't you suit up and PLAY for Miami fer Chrissake? AND YOU, Bellycheck! No red flag to throw? Did you blow yer nose in it and toss it away? WTF?"

Maybe not.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ebbie
Date: 16 Dec 13 - 11:48 AM

Rap, when people moan - not naming names here - about Texas being #2 now, I remind them it could be worse: If Alaska divided itself into TWO states, Texas would be Number Three.


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