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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Little Hawk 12 Jun 13 - 01:05 AM
Amos 12 Jun 13 - 12:52 AM
Little Hawk 11 Jun 13 - 11:35 PM
Rapparee 11 Jun 13 - 09:44 PM
Little Hawk 11 Jun 13 - 06:16 PM
Rapparee 11 Jun 13 - 06:02 PM
Little Hawk 11 Jun 13 - 04:34 PM
Rapparee 11 Jun 13 - 02:56 PM
Little Hawk 11 Jun 13 - 02:24 PM
Rapparee 11 Jun 13 - 02:13 PM
Little Hawk 11 Jun 13 - 01:31 PM
Acme 11 Jun 13 - 01:30 PM
Rapparee 11 Jun 13 - 09:38 AM
gnu 11 Jun 13 - 06:16 AM
Little Hawk 11 Jun 13 - 01:31 AM
Rapparee 10 Jun 13 - 05:49 PM
Little Hawk 10 Jun 13 - 03:52 PM
Acme 10 Jun 13 - 03:46 PM
Little Hawk 10 Jun 13 - 02:27 PM
Rapparee 10 Jun 13 - 01:59 PM
Little Hawk 10 Jun 13 - 01:25 PM
Rapparee 10 Jun 13 - 09:36 AM
gnu 10 Jun 13 - 05:19 AM
Little Hawk 10 Jun 13 - 04:00 AM
Acme 10 Jun 13 - 12:58 AM
Little Hawk 09 Jun 13 - 09:57 PM
Rapparee 09 Jun 13 - 09:46 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 09 Jun 13 - 09:44 PM
Rapparee 09 Jun 13 - 09:34 PM
gnu 09 Jun 13 - 06:58 PM
GUEST,Chonga Chimp 09 Jun 13 - 06:35 PM
Rapparee 09 Jun 13 - 04:44 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 09 Jun 13 - 04:18 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 09 Jun 13 - 01:58 PM
Rapparee 09 Jun 13 - 08:48 AM
Acme 09 Jun 13 - 02:25 AM
gnu 08 Jun 13 - 11:10 PM
Rapparee 08 Jun 13 - 10:45 PM
gnu 08 Jun 13 - 12:50 PM
Rapparee 08 Jun 13 - 11:17 AM
Acme 07 Jun 13 - 11:44 PM
Rapparee 07 Jun 13 - 10:31 PM
Acme 07 Jun 13 - 07:54 PM
Little Hawk 07 Jun 13 - 06:33 PM
Rapparee 07 Jun 13 - 06:21 PM
Little Hawk 07 Jun 13 - 04:20 PM
Rapparee 07 Jun 13 - 03:30 PM
Little Hawk 07 Jun 13 - 01:04 PM
Rapparee 07 Jun 13 - 12:58 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 07 Jun 13 - 12:31 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jun 13 - 01:05 AM

Ah, Amos, you are a true Renaissance Man, one who sees the breadth of life and relishes it to the fullest! Sounds like you had a wonderful trip up there.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jun 13 - 12:52 AM

I have just returned from Ms. Palin's home turf, the home of the eagle, the salmon, the grizzly, the moose. I have seen the land on which the Bridge toNowhere was planned (and should have been built except for becoming a political football). I have sipped the blkue waters of the Mendenhall, and stared in the face of the calving Marjorie Glacier, dodged the growlers of Glacier Bay, climbed the high flanks of the rain forest of Skagway and ziplined among her ancient pines, and steered a high-speed Zodfiac among the back channels and islets of Ketchikan's waters. I have drubk Alaskan Amber t the Red Dog, and even performed a set at the Juneau Salmon Bake camp. I have stolled the ancient mining sites outside of Juneau guided by the ineffable spirit of KT and dined with the venerable Ebb. I have taken hundreds of pictures of steely skies, granit mountains rounded down by the march of primeval ice, and the elegant culinary delights of the Norwegian Sun, a luxurious ome away from home. I have slept to the rollers of the Gulf of Alaska and woken at the first whisper of sub-Arctic dawn to brave the frozen winds coming down from the seventy-two mile back track of the Marjorie Glacier and her sisters. I have seen the Grizzly and watched the eagle snatch salmon from the sea, guarded by his mate from the intervention of gulls or ravens. I have tasted the spray of the frozen North and found it good.

(Movie at eleven. Stay tuned!) a

Therefore, fellow mortals of the House of Mom, ask not what we might do about AMos; he has already done it.


A
First vowel


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jun 13 - 11:35 PM

No, he doesn't. Where did you get such a grotesque and unlikely idea? Chongo would marry Joan Rivers before he'd marry Amos! Or better yet...Sarah Palin. But she isn't available.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jun 13 - 09:44 PM

So "Chongo" wants to marry Amos?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jun 13 - 06:16 PM

I don't know what Chonga wants to do. It's Chongo I was talking about.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jun 13 - 06:02 PM

Chonga wants to marry Amos? I don't think Amos' current wife would be happy with that arrangement.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jun 13 - 04:34 PM

Yes, that is clear. I'll have to give this some serious thought. I know what Chongo wants to do about Amos, but...well...Chongo tends to go a bit to extremes.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jun 13 - 02:56 PM

Well, opinions are welcome. WSWDAA? Surely we must Do Something.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jun 13 - 02:24 PM

Right. Now...WSWDAA?????????


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jun 13 - 02:13 PM

LH, for once you are correct. It should be WSWDAA.

I was thinking of the call letters of a radio station of my youth -- WWWW, Radio 640 and 1240 on the AM dial. The announcer was some guy name "Con Elrad" and all they broadcast was a siren-like noise, but when you are young and have imbibed...never mind. It was a simple slip of my mind.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jun 13 - 01:31 PM

Wait a minute...

I thought it was WSWDAA? Not WWWDAA. Please clarify. I think "shall" sounds better than "will". "Will" sounds too definite, whereas "shall" indicates a measure of uncertainty.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Jun 13 - 01:30 PM

What is HST?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jun 13 - 09:38 AM

WWWDAA?

Ah, the Question Of The Ages. We could, of course, feed him to Gluon except Gluon doesn't eat That Sort Of Thing -- the duckdog has better taste and likes things that taste better. He cannot be marginalized as he tends to take over the enter page, nor can we...no, that wouldn't work either.

Perhaps we might convince him to Get Help. An intervention on our part, perhaps even a commitment on his.

WWWDAA?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 11 Jun 13 - 06:16 AM

No.

$2.00 + $0.26 HST... Total $2.25.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jun 13 - 01:31 AM

Indeed...WSWDAA? is the question that has baffled the greatest philosophers and theologians of our age and caused savants to pull out their hair in frustration. Is there a solution? Who can say?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jun 13 - 05:49 PM

What Shall We Do About Amos?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Jun 13 - 03:52 PM

That's a great idea! I'm going to start working out a system for that at once.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 10 Jun 13 - 03:46 PM

Does anyone have the time to ring up the cash value of these two going hammer and tongs for the last several years? Should it be a simple flat rate of $5 per post, or is there a sliding scale for more complex arguments?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Jun 13 - 02:27 PM

Sorry, old chap. Can't argue till I receive your payment. 5 dollars, please.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jun 13 - 01:59 PM

Well, LH, I'm going to have to disagree with you about that.

Please send me an International money order for this.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Jun 13 - 01:25 PM

I am, therefore I think. Or not...in some cases.

Rapparee? I have an important announcement. I have decided that my argumentation is worth something. In fact, I think it's worth a great deal. Therefore, I am not going to argue with people on this forum any longer unless I first receive the going rate. I expect to be well paid to argue. I just thought I'd let you know. Remuneration can be forwarded through Paypal. I don't take personal checks. Not after that last one of Amos's bounced. No sir.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jun 13 - 09:36 AM

Pretty good song, too. Makes ya think, something that's all too rare these days.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 10 Jun 13 - 05:19 AM

No, Rap. Just sharing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Jun 13 - 04:00 AM

Well, I know it just like Edgar Rice Burroughs knew that Tarzan never met John Carter of Mars. It's quite simple, really. But it would be amusing if they did meet, so cross your fingers.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 10 Jun 13 - 12:58 AM

How do you know they've never met, Little Hawk? Can you control your dreams? I bet they hang out together all of the time. :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 Jun 13 - 09:57 PM

Chongo and Shane have never met, Rap. I fear that if they ever do, Shane will probably make some kind of utterly crude specist remark...and Chongo will then give him the biggest scare of his life...or perhaps just pound him into insensibility...depending on what sort of mood Chongo's in at the time.

They are, in any case, unlikely to meet. Chongo has no reason to go anywhere near Blind River.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Jun 13 - 09:46 PM

Well, gnu, that was interesting. I liked the harmonica bit. Did you want any more of a review?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 09 Jun 13 - 09:44 PM

Oh, and I suppose you never yet made a single typo in yer whole immaculate life? Hmm??? Go take a walk, Flatface.

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Jun 13 - 09:34 PM

Truth came out finally, eh Chonga? It's little slips like that which'll put you in the Joliet slammer. Like your buddy, Shame McBride -- research is turning up some very interesting facts about him; I can't say anything definitive right now but it seems that our boy Shame has been walkin' on the other side of the road, if you take my meaning.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 09 Jun 13 - 06:58 PM

Well, I just don't know what to say. I am all for saving the forests for the chimps, so...

https://soundcloud.com/#ernie1949/is-our-forest-really-ours-3


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chonga Chimp
Date: 09 Jun 13 - 06:35 PM

That's what I meant. Anyways, I was the lucky one, see? After my dear Ma got tragically ate by a damned Leopard, the good folks at the US Trade Mission took me under their wing(s) and raised me to be a loyal American subject. I useta salute the flag raisin' of the Stars and Stripes every mornin' at our little compound on the West African coast. Then I took a banana boat to New York, and the rest is history.

Amos dares to refer to me as an "ideational monstrosity". Easy for him to say! He likes them fifty dollar words. But he is just evadin' the sad truth which is starin' him in the face, coz I am red, white, and blue to the very core, whereas he is only that way when he wears his striped pajamas! Ook! Ook!

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Jun 13 - 04:44 PM

Dear Chonga,

Get stuffed.
I went to Catholic schools.

Sincerely yours,
/s/Rapparee


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 09 Jun 13 - 04:18 PM

Hmm. Or was it PTSS? Now get down on yer knees and say 150 Hail Marys!

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 09 Jun 13 - 01:58 PM

You was brought up by nuns, Rap!?? Geez. Now I get what yer problem is. Yer sufferin' PTSD, ain'tcha? Just don't make me get...the ruler! Ook! Ook! ;-D

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Jun 13 - 08:48 AM

Oh, my. My childhood is flashing before my eyes. Remembering singing the "Vatican Rag" in church and what the nuns did to us later...singing "The Elements" in chemistry class...the nights at the beach along the Mighty Mississippi drinking and singing "The B*****d King of England" with the girls joining in on the last line as they removed their...hats....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Jun 13 - 02:25 AM

Seems a good time for a Tom Lehrer song. Take your pick.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 08 Jun 13 - 11:10 PM

Yeah, ahm a chokin.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Jun 13 - 10:45 PM

That...that reminds me of my favorite song from my childhood.

I want a beer
Just like the beer
That pickled dear old Dad.
It was a beer
And the only beer
That Daddy ever had.
A good old-fashioned beer with lots of foam
Took twenty men to carry Daddy home,
Oh, I want a beer
Just like the beer
That pickled dear of Dad.


Kinda brings a tear to your eye and chokes you up a bit, don't it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 08 Jun 13 - 12:50 PM

Mom does that kinda stuff?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Jun 13 - 11:17 AM

Heavens, no! You'd only sink into a slough of dissipation and sloth, reading trashy novels and eating candy and drinking mai-tais or worse all day! You could end up just like Mom!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Jun 13 - 11:44 PM

Oh, yes, please let's set it up that way! I'll find other things to occupy my time.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Jun 13 - 10:31 PM

Gluon could do that and more: arrange for all future dust and dirt to be sent to some other space/time so you wouldn't be bothered in the future. But then you'd have nothing to do.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Jun 13 - 07:54 PM

So much to do! So little time to do it! Someone round up Gluon and send her over, maybe she can flash around the house and collect all of the dust electrons in one swoop.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Jun 13 - 06:33 PM

And 1...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Jun 13 - 06:21 PM

48100.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Jun 13 - 04:20 PM

I think you need to recalibrate your Universal Reality coordinates, Rap. You've somehow gotten yourself into a parallel dimension that's a few parsecs over on the scale. The Chonga you speak of may exist there, but doesn't here. You should decide whether you want to be here...or there...and stop conflating the two.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Jun 13 - 03:30 PM

Chinga's twin sister, who had a sex-change operation and paid for it by selling his/her mother and sister into a life a sin and degradation.

I've explained all of this before and included the citations proving it. Go look it up; I retired.

If Chonga wants to continue in denial, well, it's not my life...or mind.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Jun 13 - 01:04 PM

Who is this "Chonga" you keep talking to?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Jun 13 - 12:58 PM

Ya know, Chonga, that those who deny their history have no future? You're in denial about yourself. Nurse Ratchett could help you, as could electroconvulsive therapy, insulin therapy, or several other treatments. Since you've apparently already had one you can forget about a lobotomty.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 07 Jun 13 - 12:31 PM

Who are you talkin' to, Rap? The name don't sound familiar.

- Chongo


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