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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 10 Jan 11 - 03:53 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 10 Jan 11 - 02:19 PM
MMario 10 Jan 11 - 01:11 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 10 Jan 11 - 12:40 PM
Rapparee 10 Jan 11 - 10:08 AM
Amos 09 Jan 11 - 09:30 PM
GUEST,Eiseley 09 Jan 11 - 08:47 PM
Rapparee 09 Jan 11 - 08:45 PM
gnu 09 Jan 11 - 06:47 PM
Rapparee 09 Jan 11 - 06:17 PM
Amos 09 Jan 11 - 01:11 PM
Acme 09 Jan 11 - 12:10 PM
GUEST,Eiseley 09 Jan 11 - 12:01 PM
Rapparee 09 Jan 11 - 11:43 AM
Amos 09 Jan 11 - 11:04 AM
Rapparee 08 Jan 11 - 11:01 PM
Amos 08 Jan 11 - 10:24 PM
Rapparee 08 Jan 11 - 09:38 PM
Amos 08 Jan 11 - 08:27 PM
Amos 08 Jan 11 - 05:32 PM
gnu 08 Jan 11 - 05:31 PM
Rapparee 08 Jan 11 - 04:44 PM
Acme 08 Jan 11 - 10:58 AM
Amos 08 Jan 11 - 10:48 AM
Rapparee 08 Jan 11 - 09:36 AM
Rapparee 07 Jan 11 - 08:44 PM
Acme 07 Jan 11 - 04:43 PM
Amos 07 Jan 11 - 03:39 PM
Acme 07 Jan 11 - 12:02 PM
Amos 07 Jan 11 - 11:27 AM
Rapparee 07 Jan 11 - 10:03 AM
Little Hawk 07 Jan 11 - 05:42 AM
Acme 07 Jan 11 - 02:42 AM
Acme 07 Jan 11 - 12:27 AM
Rapparee 06 Jan 11 - 11:30 PM
Amos 06 Jan 11 - 09:36 PM
Eiseley 06 Jan 11 - 07:58 PM
gnu 06 Jan 11 - 07:05 PM
Little Hawk 06 Jan 11 - 07:01 PM
Amos 06 Jan 11 - 06:51 PM
Amos 06 Jan 11 - 06:41 PM
Little Hawk 06 Jan 11 - 05:00 PM
Rapparee 06 Jan 11 - 03:32 PM
Amos 06 Jan 11 - 02:41 PM
Rapparee 06 Jan 11 - 02:00 PM
Rapparee 06 Jan 11 - 01:59 PM
Rapparee 06 Jan 11 - 01:58 PM
Little Hawk 06 Jan 11 - 01:09 PM
Acme 06 Jan 11 - 11:38 AM
Amos 06 Jan 11 - 11:34 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Jan 11 - 03:53 PM

Chongo:

You are a complete jerk, I think. You should move to Arizona. You need a place where gun-toting imbeciles are tolerated.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 10 Jan 11 - 02:19 PM

Well, Mario, if it ain't...it should be.

I am gonna keep that statement in mind for the next time I run into a bad scrape with them North Side Gorillas. I will put it to them like this...

"You know what you guys are? Yer actually just a buncha meta-pronouns actin' as exponential pre-nominatives or differential intensifiers. That's what you guys really are."

...and then I'll nail 'em good with a full clip while they stand there with their big mouths hangin' open tryin' to sort out what the hell I just said. ;-D

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 10 Jan 11 - 01:11 PM

Or else they are actually meta-pronouns acting as exponential pre-nominatives or differential intensifiers.

Isn't this banned by several funamentalist churches?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 10 Jan 11 - 12:40 PM

"we found we could have a perfectly wonderful day with NO FIREARMS AT ALL!!!" - Amos

Boy, I have heard some STUPID stuff on this forum, lemme tell ya, folks, but THAT has gotta be the stupidEST comment yet! What a pansy. I been packin' heat ever since 1925 and I ain't about to stop now. You never know when you might need a little firepower to level the playin' field, and it's a good way of gettin' some respect from them that otherwise ain't inclined to show none.

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jan 11 - 10:08 AM

Perhaps a sap well placed behind your left ear? I learned to do that in a bar in Papeete when a merchant captain needed another crew member immediately and wasn't very choosy about how he got one.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Jan 11 - 09:30 PM

WHen he gets knotty like that it makes me pine for some other sap.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Eiseley
Date: 09 Jan 11 - 08:47 PM

Yes, I knew you were knotty.

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Jan 11 - 08:45 PM

Hah! Amos, I've known what the bitter end was since I was a wee little tad. AND I can tie a bowline, a bowline on a bight, a sheepshank, clove hitch, Prusick knot, sheetbend, and, well, I've plenty knots that I know. I can hitch a dinghy so it won't float away and reef a sail in a Force 5 gale. I'm half-horse and half-alligator, born of the lightnin' and...oh, dang. Sorry, I was getting carried away again.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 09 Jan 11 - 06:47 PM

Bitter end means a tad different up Kent County.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Jan 11 - 06:17 PM

That's where sailors kick landlubbers in bar fights, isn't it? In the bollards?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Jan 11 - 01:11 PM

Bitter End: (nautical) the inboard end of a line or cable especially the end that is wound around a bitt.

Bitt: a single or double post fixed on a deck for securing mooring lines and towlines. On a deck, a bitt is more commonly called a bollard.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Jan 11 - 12:10 PM

No, but I think Eiseley works for the Idaho branch of SPD. The SPUD auxiliary.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Eiseley
Date: 09 Jan 11 - 12:01 PM

We went up Sole-dad mountain just for the halubit. And thankfully there were no mosquitoes, or Amos would have reported that they had "bitter end."

Ha ha ha!

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Jan 11 - 11:43 AM

You don't work for the SPD, do you?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Jan 11 - 11:04 AM

LOL!!The doughnut was police department Standard Issue. The other was because she took pity on the guy, who was hard of herring.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Jan 11 - 11:01 PM

Golly gee, Amos. So did I. Didn't touch a firearm all day and I most likely won't tomorrow or Monday or Tuesday. For one thing I'm going to Lava Hot Springs to soak in hot water during this chill spell. For another I don't plan to do so and doubt the need to do so will arise.

I'm glad she didn't take her gun to town. Last time she was at a national library-type meeting she was in Seattle and started "hoorahin'" the town by flinging fish at passersby down at the Pike Street Market. Caught a cop up 'longside the head, stole his hat and badge and left him unconscious on the sidewalk with a doughnut in one hand and a herring in the other. The Seattle PD still hasn't figured out the mystic significance of this, if any.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Jan 11 - 10:24 PM

Ah, good Rapparee, we found something mysterious and wonderful to relate: we found we could have a perfectly wonderful day with NO FIREARMS AT ALL!!! Can you BELIEVE it???? Mirabile dictu!! We should report this to Someone Important, I am sure...




A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Jan 11 - 09:38 PM

Good for you. Did she bring her gun with her? Library Association meetings can get on your nerves.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Jan 11 - 08:27 PM

We hve seen a sweet movie called "Outsourced" with a good endinng Recommended!! Now we are swapping songs and eating pizza.

The temperature outside has plummeted to a bitter 60 degrees F.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Jan 11 - 05:32 PM

Dear Mister Raparree:

Miss Eiseley is shocked, and appalled, and disconcerted and nonplussed and offended and irked by your presumptuous remark. She asserts in retribution she will bring you back only ONE pen, and will insure it has no ink.

We have roamed the county from the towering peaks of Mount SOledad looking over the jewel-like reaches of La Jolla, to the coves of the shore where the sea-lions gather on the Children's Cove (keeping the children away) and we have been in the interior of the Star of India and along her decks, and upon her very quarterdeck, too!

Furthermore we have investigated the very deck of the HMS Surprise where Jack Aubrey, his own self, wore a circular path pondering the treacherous French. And the bowels of a record-setting deep-diving submarine. The temperature was in the low 70's, without a drop of white paint to be seen!!

SO there. Blllgggrrrrp[ppppppppt.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 08 Jan 11 - 05:31 PM

She is into rugs?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Jan 11 - 04:44 PM

Do these things mean Eiseley is a hooker?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Jan 11 - 10:58 AM

I hope to get to escort Eiseley around here in May. It'll be a squeaker, picking up my son in Arizona early that week then being here for the UNT graduation late in the week, but I think we'll manage at least a visit.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Jan 11 - 10:48 AM

I shall be escorting the Faire Eiseley around town this morning in the very best Southern California hospitality fashion.

Snarks aside, I don't think him or he are possessive nouns. They are disponential verbal analogues. Or else they are actually meta-pronouns acting as exponential pre-nominatives or differential intensifiers. Depends on the context.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Jan 11 - 09:36 AM

Eiseley will be hooking up with Amos very soon. Maybe she can give him some couth but she'd probably be wasting her time.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Jan 11 - 08:44 PM

Amos, settle down! Be cool! She's got a grammar book and she's not afraid to use it.

(I prefer Strunk and White, myself.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Jan 11 - 04:43 PM

You're right, pronouns. And it isn't all uses of the word, but it looked like that in one instance. That was supposed to be a one-off snark, so don't make me get out the Harbrace and read it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Jan 11 - 03:39 PM

Lesse, I'm trying to come up with examples of that here..."Fuck him!" "No, fuck HER!". No, that isn't right.

"He loaned me him WInchester." Nah, doesn't seem kosher, somehow.

A possessive NOUN? ANd here I thought they were both pronouns!! What is this book you have??? Does it give examples? "Him tore him shirt fighting her dog"...?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Jan 11 - 12:02 PM

Him and Her are frequently possessive nouns used instead of "he" and "she." It says so in my Harbrace College Handbook.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Jan 11 - 11:27 AM

"Him" is a possessive noun? Woah,, you been in Texas too long, there, Still. They've been rewriting the textbooks again, haven't they? "Me an' Buck went and picked up the Lawson sisters in him pickup truck."....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Jan 11 - 10:03 AM

...you really should meet Jacqui and him.

There, I fixed it. Or perhaps I should have said, "...meet Jacqui and what's-his-name."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Jan 11 - 05:42 AM

Oh, how lovely! What a sweetie. ;-) Thanks!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Jan 11 - 02:42 AM

LH - this one's for you!

I picked it up looking at the photos of dogs in the snow that people submitted to Cesar Millan's site (I sent a few shots of my pooches also, but they're not wiener dogs!) It's on flickr.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Jan 11 - 12:27 AM

he and Jacqui. Him is a possessive noun in "him and Jacqui," don't you think?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 11:30 PM

...and Morse code. If you don't know Morse, you really should meet him and Jacqui.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 09:36 PM

In an emergency, you can use a mirror....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 07:58 PM

Cool! I have a couple of things to discuss with the Big Guy. Will you please point out one of those phones for me?

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 07:05 PM

I need some fresh air. BIAB.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 07:01 PM

More thievery!!!! That's a classic old English-Irish joke which you have unscrupulously transplanted into the USA!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 06:51 PM

While y'all are wrassling with the white paint you put on your trees and streets every winter, a little entertaining story:

A man in Topeka, Kansas, decided to write a book about
churches
around the country. He started by flying to New York City, and
started working from there.

Going to a very large church, he began taking photographs and
making notes. He spotted a golden telephone on the
vestibule
wall and was intrigued with a sign which read "$10,000 a minute."

Seeking out the pastor he asked about the phone and the
sign.
The Pastor answered that this golden phone is, in fact, a direct line to Heaven and if he pays the price he can talk directly to God.

The man thanked the pastor and continued on his way. As he continued to visit churches in D.C., Atlanta, Greensboro, Chicago, Milwaukee, and all around the United States, he found more phones with the same sign, and the same answer from each pastor.

Finally, he arrived in California. Upon entering a church in

San Diego, behold, he saw the usual golden telephone. But
THIS time, the sign read "Calls: 35 cents."

Fascinated, he asked to talk to the pastor. "Reverend, I have been
in cities all across the country and in each church I have found this golden telephone and have been told it is a direct line to Heaven and that I could talk to God, but, in the other churches the cost was $10,000 a minute. Your sign reads 35 cents a call. Why?"

The pastor, smiling benignly, replied, "Son, you're in San Diego now.....it's a local call."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 06:41 PM

He's just feeling a little post-mortem--driving all the way to Hell gives him autopsy and makes him queasy.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 05:00 PM

What are you trying to thay?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 03:32 PM

Lethe just drop the subject.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 02:41 PM

Humph. Give me a drachma, and I'll show you Stygian darkness for all time... it's right across the river, there. We can play pick-up-Styx to see who goes first...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 02:00 PM

39093! Palindrome!!! And a good one at that!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 01:59 PM

I'm sorry. That was unfair. More of a Stygian dusk.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 01:58 PM

Would that we all could achieve your Stygian darkness, Amos.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 01:09 PM

Would that we could all attain your Olympian heights, Amos! ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 11:38 AM

Hey, it's only 911 posts until 40K! On your toes, MOABites, lest a usurper attempt to bag the big one.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Jan 11 - 11:34 AM

Your first thought _should_ have been to dish out voluminous and enthusiastic admiration at my witty composition, you sluggardly dullard!!

;>)


A


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