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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Paco Rabanne 06 Apr 05 - 04:01 AM
Paco Rabanne 06 Apr 05 - 04:00 AM
Paco Rabanne 06 Apr 05 - 03:59 AM
Little Hawk 06 Apr 05 - 02:29 AM
GUEST,Bryant Fish 06 Apr 05 - 01:23 AM
Acme 06 Apr 05 - 12:02 AM
Rustic Rebel 05 Apr 05 - 11:50 PM
Acme 05 Apr 05 - 11:43 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 05 Apr 05 - 11:40 PM
GUEST,Delbert Naseer 05 Apr 05 - 11:29 PM
Rustic Rebel 05 Apr 05 - 10:58 PM
Rapparee 05 Apr 05 - 09:38 PM
Amos 05 Apr 05 - 08:36 PM
rumanci 05 Apr 05 - 08:15 PM
Bunnahabhain 05 Apr 05 - 08:08 PM
Amos 05 Apr 05 - 06:37 PM
Rapparee 05 Apr 05 - 06:26 PM
Amos 05 Apr 05 - 04:12 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 05 Apr 05 - 03:50 PM
Bunnahabhain 05 Apr 05 - 02:40 PM
GUEST,Prince Mablo 05 Apr 05 - 11:33 AM
GUEST,Theo S. Arus 05 Apr 05 - 11:25 AM
GUEST,dictionary 05 Apr 05 - 11:22 AM
Amos 05 Apr 05 - 09:36 AM
Rapparee 05 Apr 05 - 08:42 AM
Bunnahabhain 05 Apr 05 - 07:15 AM
Amos 05 Apr 05 - 02:33 AM
Rapparee 05 Apr 05 - 02:29 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 05 Apr 05 - 12:59 AM
Little Hawk 04 Apr 05 - 11:55 PM
Amos 04 Apr 05 - 11:37 PM
Bunnahabhain 04 Apr 05 - 11:19 PM
Acme 04 Apr 05 - 11:14 PM
Amos 04 Apr 05 - 10:38 PM
MOAB 04 Apr 05 - 08:45 PM
Amos 04 Apr 05 - 06:00 PM
Rapparee 04 Apr 05 - 05:37 PM
Amos 04 Apr 05 - 04:46 PM
Rapparee 04 Apr 05 - 04:35 PM
GUEST,MMario 04 Apr 05 - 01:27 PM
Acme 04 Apr 05 - 01:12 PM
Rapparee 04 Apr 05 - 12:56 PM
Amos 04 Apr 05 - 12:50 PM
Rapparee 04 Apr 05 - 11:16 AM
Amos 04 Apr 05 - 09:26 AM
Rapparee 04 Apr 05 - 08:58 AM
Rustic Rebel 04 Apr 05 - 01:10 AM
Amos 04 Apr 05 - 12:46 AM
Amos 04 Apr 05 - 12:41 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 03 Apr 05 - 10:48 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Paco Rabanne
Date: 06 Apr 05 - 04:01 AM

7200. Happy birthday NOT! Delete delete.....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Paco Rabanne
Date: 06 Apr 05 - 04:00 AM

No?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Paco Rabanne
Date: 06 Apr 05 - 03:59 AM

Are you up yet Terry? I challenge you
to a duel!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Apr 05 - 02:29 AM

The One-Car Blimp one is great! ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Bryant Fish
Date: 06 Apr 05 - 01:23 AM

And it comes of age on the day of the UK Election...

Could this be an omen?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Apr 05 - 12:02 AM

That sounds like an old saw.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 11:50 PM

That 'poops' me out just thinking about a miter box on my head. Not carrying it on my head but trying to get those precision cuts from up there would be tough.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 11:43 PM

I want dibs on the first post that goes on the day 03 May 05. Then it will be the perfect reversal of the first MOAB post on 05 May 03. Which always momentarily confuses me when I see that "05" because I have to think whether the list is coming or going, so to speak.

Heck with these century marks. (Besides, I probably can't stay up late enough to fool with the next one. I want to catch up on a little sleep. Darned CDT isn't as pleasant as CST.

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 11:40 PM

Well, if MOAB is gonna be a religion, it should definitely have a supreme prelate. And that supreme prelate should be called "The Poop". The Poop gets to issue Poopal Bulls, which is not the same as spreading bull poop, though it is similar in many respects. The Poop gets elected by the members The College of Dickiebirds. After he/she/it gets elected, he/she/it gets to wear a miter box on his/her/its head and carry the Poopal Spatula.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Delbert Naseer
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 11:29 PM

Seven thousand, one hundred and ninety, incidentally.

Have a nice day


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 10:58 PM

I find in these irreligious posts an island of metaphysical strength and a transcendental quality to my perception of an expanding awareness of any precogitive imagery I may have obtained through the kinetic interface that is a direct consequence of an internal calm created from the Moabites.


Amos, I knew Ulysses, I was talking about the other ones. The other ones from the past of your glorious untoothed soul to the infinite wisdom of your babbling brook of words.


Rapaire, I have some comfrey to heal those wounds! (Ha!)


Little Hawk- William Shatner-La'MOAB Prince. (another Ha!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 09:38 PM

Well, whatever you decide I refuse the position of the god who dies and rises again! I did that the last time a couple thousand years ago and I said, "Never Again! This shit ain't worth it!" I mean, for the longest time I couldn't even wash my hands without the water leaking out through the holes.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 08:36 PM

It's apostle ability....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: rumanci
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 08:15 PM

it sounds like a prophetable option tome    hmmmmmmm


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 08:08 PM

MOAB now has almost 8000 verses, by many prophets all claiming to be the true voice of MOM. Dou you think we can publish the book of MOAB as a holy book, and start our own religion, to be eligable for miracles/charitable status/nubile yet naive young blondes?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 06:37 PM

Start lickin' 'em quick, Rapaire!! QUICK!! Otherwise you might hafta join 'em. It's a little metaphysical trick I picked up from Swami Rami Swantsbanane-Alors. An old guru of mine. Ascended long ago.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 06:26 PM

I...I see it all now, so very, very clearly, Bee-dubya. I took your advice and re-read MOAB from the beginning and now everything is so clear and so, so lucid. In fact, brilliant white light pervades everything, and there is an absolutely fiercely clear light burning ahead of me like a star. It...it is calling my name. I see dead relatives....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 04:12 PM

BWL,

You are my best-beloved WHACKO!!!! In whom I am well-pleased.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 03:50 PM

Little known fact: Sir jOhn from Hull is a Nigerian! He's just a white Nigerian from Hull. JOhn's being Nigerian is highly unusual because neither of jOhn's parents nor anyone else in his family is Nigerian. Nor has jOhn ever actually been to Nigeria. In fact, jOhn is totally unaware of his Nigerianism.

If you don't understand how such a thing is possible, please reread the entire MOAB from beginning to end and then read at least 100 separate threads with the word "Hull" in their titles. You will then see that jOhn being Nigerian makes perfect sense.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 02:40 PM

Did Sir jOhn teach the Nigerians spelling?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Prince Mablo
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 11:33 AM

We are very offended that you associate Our Royal Personage with the one called "Shatner". You may obtain our Royal Forgiveness by send to Us the account and routing numbers of your principle bank accounts. This action will not only insure our Royal Forgiveness, but will entitle you to a 50% sharing of the $30,000,000 that Our Royal Selves clandestinely accumulate in the First Bank of Nairobi when We were Prince Lambo of Kenya, but which We cannot access for reasons far too convoluted and unbelievable to go into at this time.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Theo S. Arus
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 11:25 AM

Mablo - see also the Ibo Lambo; Hausa blamo;

slang - meaning "one who is so insignificant as to be beneath notice"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,dictionary
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 11:22 AM

Mablo - from the old Yuruba (south-eastern dialect) mal'blo literally "worthless dung"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 09:36 AM

I think Mablo is a Nigerian title of royalty, actually. Means "Tallest Shitball" in Kumbawi-Setana, the most popular dialect in the prairies sector of that sorry region.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 08:42 AM

Or WILLIAM SHATNER IS PRINCE MABLO. Or LOAMB. Or LAMBO.

The last word doesn't matter, since it's a proper name of some sort. The important thing is the William Shatner has been conclusively identified as Prince, or the singer formerly known as formerly known as Prince.

I, myself, would never have guessed.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 07:15 AM

How about WILLIAM SHATNER IS A PORCINE BML?

where BML is clearly closely related to a BWL...

Bunnhabhain


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 02:33 AM

Either that or WILLIAM SHATNER IS PRICNOMABLE. Just as accurate.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 02:29 AM

Yeah. Exactly what I was going to say.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 05 Apr 05 - 12:59 AM

WILLIAM SHATNER IS A ONE-CAR BLIMP


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 11:55 PM

Solve the Anagram:

LIMALIW RESTNAH SI PRICNOMABAEL


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 11:37 PM

Mmmphhh....BECOME? I am sure in my good friend's case it is far too late; strangeness has become terminal.

Besides at the moment it is dark out and I want to stay inside.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 11:19 PM

No, let them play in public. It wasn't computer stuff, or any of the really bad things. Besides, without our restraining influences they'd become strange...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 11:14 PM

Go outside and play, you two. It's a nice day out.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 10:38 PM

c"est pas juste, maman -- c'est LUI qui l'a commencé!! Vraiment!! C'est pas ma faute, ma parole!!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MOAB
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 08:45 PM

Rapaire! Amos! How many times do I have to tell you? If you must play games that the other children can't understand, do it in your own rooms!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 06:00 PM

Oh, Rapaire, you put on such airs!! :D Zoanoma agapo to you too, buddy.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 05:37 PM

Well, Amos, "Παντα ρει και ουδεν μενει", you know. Or, perhaps apropos, "Δεν πρέπει να επιδιώξουμε να αφαιρέσουμε από τις αποτυχίες των μεγάλων κανόνων Ελλήνων και Ρωμαίων για την ορατή μορφή μεγαλοφυίας εφ' όσον δεν μπορούμε να τους αντιπαραβάλουμε με τους ελληνικούς βλάκες."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 04:46 PM

Shame he had to beat his own brains out with a 2x4 in the end. It was the Electrolux treatment that did him in, they say. Damn gobstoppers.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 04:35 PM

"The Mom Always Rises" is a book by Hernie Emingway. He also wrote "The Bread Always Rises," "The Rise Always Rises," "The Raised Always Rises," and other such books. Hernie wasn't one to let a good title down. He learned that after writing "The Old Man Who Could See"; that was followed by "The Old Men And The 'C'," "The Man And The Old Sea," and others along the some line. Hernie always beat a plot line to death, too.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 01:27 PM

oif course MOM is at the top. Mom always rises.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 01:12 PM

I see MOM is back at the top, that's good. Sorry I wasn't here to help with the lifting for a couple of days--the phone went out on Saturday (and still hasn't come back yet. . .) Phone company ran some sort of diagnostic and then asked if I had any dogs in my back yard. Typical phone company non sequitur, eh? I assume they think the phone problem is MY fault--I suspect that one of their minions turned off my switch at the box up the street when they were working up there.

Anyway, MOM, this may be a brief visit--I just called my house from the office and the answering machine didn't come on, so I think I'm still out of DSL there.

Hold the fort, snotty or otherwise, guys.

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 12:56 PM

Actually, I already knew what it meant and where it came from. I, like all truly literate people, read Lucius Annaeus Seneca daily. In Latin, too.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 12:50 PM

Where you find things is your own choice, good Rapaire. I was merely clarifying where it came from, and what it meant.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 11:16 AM

No, I found it in Philip Sidney's Defense of Poesy, something I read and re-read almost daily. I say "almost" because sometimes I read the Summa Contra Gentiles or my Batman comics.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 09:26 AM

Rapaire offers: "The savage ruler who wields the sceptre with a hard hand/ Fears the timid, and thus fear returns to its author." from Seneca Oedipus 705-6.

Rustic: I am doused in glory's own blush by your sweet remarks; however it needs saying that all that post was a quote, from the opening page of Ulysses, a scene from Joyce set on a ruined tower on the edges of Dublin. I was simply providing a correction to the strange palimpsest committed by Vincent in the earlier post. David Gergen and Bert, indeed. Humph!! :>D

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 08:58 AM

Qui sceptra saevus duro imperio regit,
Timet timentes, metus in auctorem redit.

                           --Seneca


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 01:10 AM

Bravo Amos!! Me hat and me particles of anything resembling anything, off to you,! Dear poet of the mother that has weaned your poeticness to a state of pure absolutesness!
I deem it safe to say you are the dream within the dream, that only the true dreamers redeem a viable dream unto themselves.

Ah-ha I believe it to be true.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 12:46 AM

Stately, plump Buck Mulligan came from the stairhead, bearing a bowl of lather on which a mirror and a razor lay crossed. A yellow dressinggown, ungirdled, was sustained gently behind him by the mild morning air. He held the bowl aloft and intoned:

-- Introibo ad altare Dei.

Halted, he peered down the dark winding stairs and called up coarsely:

-- Come up, Kinch! Come up, you fearful jesuit!

Solemnly he came forward and mounted the round gunrest. He faced about and blessed gravely thrice the tower, the surrounding country and the awaking mountains. Then, catching sight of Stephen Dedalus, he bent towards him and made rapid crosses in the air, gurgling in his throat and shaking his head. Stephen Dedalus, displeased and sleepy, leaned his arms on the top of the staircase and looked coldly at the shaking gurgling face that blessed him, equine in its length, and at the light untonsured hair, grained and hued like pale oak.

Buck Mulligan peeped an instant under the mirror and then covered the bowl smartly.

-- Back to barracks! he said sternly.

He added in a preacher's tone:

-- For this, O dearly beloved, is the genuine Christine: body and soul and blood and ouns. Slow music, please. Shut your eyes, gents. One moment. A little trouble about those white corpuscles. Silence, all.

He peered sideways up and gave a long low whistle of call, then paused awhile in rapt attention, his even white teeth glistening here and there with gold points. Chrysostomos. Two strong shrill whistles answered through the calm.

-- Thanks, old chap, he cried briskly. That will do nicely. Switch off the current, will you?

He skipped off the gunrest and looked gravely at his watcher, gathering about his legs the loose folds of his gown. The plump shadowed face and sullen oval jowl recalled a prelate, patron of arts in the middle ages. A pleasant smile broke quietly over his lips.

-- The mockery of it! he said gaily. Your absurd name, an ancient Greek!

He pointed his finger in friendly jest and went over to the parapet, laughing to himself. Stephen Dedalus stepped up, followed him wearily halfway and sat down on the edge of the gunrest, watching him still as he propped his mirror on the parapet, dipped the brush in the bowl and lathered cheeks and neck.

Buck Mulligan's gay voice went on.

-- My name is absurd too: Malachi Mulligan, two dactyls. But it has a Hellenic ring, hasn't it? Tripping and sunny like the buck himself. We must go to Athens. Will you come if I can get the aunt to fork out twenty quid?

He laid the brush aside and, laughing with delight, cried:

-- Will he come? The jejune jesuit!

Ceasing, he began to shave with care.

-- Tell me, Mulligan, Stephen said quietly.

-- Yes, my love?

-- How long is Haines going to stay in this tower?

Buck Mulligan showed a shaven cheek over his right shoulder.

-- God, isn't he dreadful? he said frankly. A ponderous Saxon. He thinks you're not a gentleman. God, these bloody English! Bursting with money and indigestion. Because he comes from Oxford. You know, Dedalus, you have the real Oxford manner. He can't make you out. O, my name for you is the best: Kinch, the knifeblade.

56

He shaved warily over his chin.

-- He was raving all night about a black panther, Stephen said. Where is his guncase?

-- A woful lunatic! Mulligan said. Were you in a funk?

-- I was, Stephen said with energy and growing fear. Out here in the dark with a man I don't know raving and moaning to himself about shooting a black panther. You saved men from drowning. I'm not a hero, however. If he stays on here I am off.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 12:41 AM

God, Vincent, that is amazing!! If the line about Plump, stately Buck Mulligan wasn't etched into my brain in deep stone letters I would believe it WAS Joyce.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 10:48 PM

It is now Daylight Saving Time and I have managed to waste the first hour of extra daylight by sleeping through it. I had a headache and decided to take a brief power nap and next thing I knew, it was dark! I feel I should apologize, but I don't know to whom. All those people turned their clocks back an hour so I could experience the miracle of being fooled into thinking I was watching the sun set an entire hour later than it did yesterday and I blew it! And, to top it all off, I still have the damned headache.


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