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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 17 Nov 13 - 08:29 PM
GUEST 17 Nov 13 - 08:26 PM
Acme 17 Nov 13 - 07:59 PM
Rapparee 17 Nov 13 - 05:13 PM
gnu 17 Nov 13 - 07:47 AM
Acme 17 Nov 13 - 01:56 AM
Rapparee 16 Nov 13 - 11:21 PM
Amos 16 Nov 13 - 11:16 PM
Rapparee 16 Nov 13 - 04:50 PM
Pete Jennings 16 Nov 13 - 07:27 AM
gnu 16 Nov 13 - 07:10 AM
Amos 16 Nov 13 - 04:47 AM
Acme 16 Nov 13 - 12:21 AM
Rapparee 15 Nov 13 - 03:23 PM
Pete Jennings 15 Nov 13 - 12:10 PM
gnu 15 Nov 13 - 11:46 AM
Rapparee 15 Nov 13 - 09:57 AM
gnu 15 Nov 13 - 06:42 AM
Amos 15 Nov 13 - 04:15 AM
Acme 15 Nov 13 - 01:57 AM
Acme 14 Nov 13 - 02:31 PM
Rapparee 14 Nov 13 - 09:55 AM
Amos 14 Nov 13 - 09:49 AM
gnu 14 Nov 13 - 06:13 AM
Amos 14 Nov 13 - 12:27 AM
GUEST,laptopgnu 13 Nov 13 - 10:09 PM
Rapparee 13 Nov 13 - 09:27 PM
GUEST 13 Nov 13 - 09:02 PM
Rapparee 13 Nov 13 - 07:18 PM
gnu 13 Nov 13 - 06:43 PM
Hamish 13 Nov 13 - 04:06 PM
Rapparee 13 Nov 13 - 02:45 PM
gnu 13 Nov 13 - 02:18 PM
Amos 13 Nov 13 - 10:50 AM
Rapparee 13 Nov 13 - 09:35 AM
Hamish 13 Nov 13 - 07:51 AM
gnu 13 Nov 13 - 07:02 AM
Amos 13 Nov 13 - 12:53 AM
Acme 12 Nov 13 - 05:59 PM
Rapparee 12 Nov 13 - 04:38 PM
GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River 12 Nov 13 - 12:15 PM
Rapparee 12 Nov 13 - 10:52 AM
gnu 12 Nov 13 - 05:54 AM
Amos 12 Nov 13 - 12:01 AM
Amos 11 Nov 13 - 11:53 PM
Rapparee 11 Nov 13 - 11:27 PM
Rapparee 11 Nov 13 - 03:36 PM
GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River 11 Nov 13 - 02:31 PM
Acme 11 Nov 13 - 12:54 PM
Rapparee 11 Nov 13 - 10:19 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Nov 13 - 08:29 PM

Fortunately, Gnu's man=cave has a large and generously appointed basement.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 17 Nov 13 - 08:26 PM

Poor old Randy. Termites? How sad. Uncle "Peg Leg" Henry Pascal never had a problem with them. His problems were with the cops because he was a rum runner... a bootlegger. He stayed at Gramps house in winter and delivered groceries for Harmers and the Willet Fruit where Gramps was the "shipper" (2ic to the guy that owned the company). Uncle Henry would get 5 gallon cans of "Hand Brand Alcohol" delivered on the CNR from Uppity Canada or from runners off the coast of NB and NS. He would keep the cans in Gramps' back yard and deliver them on a toboggan. He delivered groceries by toboggan under Gramps' employ so that worked well for the bootlegging cover. Great story about the night he had a bunch under a blanket when he was going by the cop shop but never mind that. Better yet, he sent Uncle Chic for baccy one day as he was too drunk to navigate. Chic was about 5 years old. Pegleg tamped a pipe and lit it and got Uncle chic ta put his finger in the pipe whereupon, Chic screamed blue murder. Gamma raced in and that was that. Uncle Henry was out the door, never to return.

Thence came the tale, and song, of Henry Pegleg Pascal. Bereft of his winter abode, he sought refuge in the Queens County Jail. He was successful. He used his peg leg to kick in the plate glass window of the liquor store in Chipman, nb.ca. Drunk as a skunk but smart as a fox. And snug as a bug in a rug with three square a day until spring. And, then, back ta bootleggin.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Nov 13 - 07:59 PM

That's certainly a long-range grocery plan!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Nov 13 - 05:13 PM

And I thought I was a smart shopper.

Of course, if you live in Canada you can never tell when you'll be snowed in for several weeks or a beaver will gnaw off your leg and you will be stumping around until help arrives. Why, my Great-Great Uncle Randolph spent an entire winter snowed in in his cabin outside of Dawson back in 1901 -- he finally had to eat his furniture just to stay alive until breakup. If he'd been a smart shopper he would have had all sorts of stuff, including his partner, frozen when he could get to them easily. Instead he ate things like boiled leg of table. Uncle Randolph was powerful glad when people finally came to see how he was, long about August (he wasn't very well liked). By then the snow had melted down to the top of the chimney and Uncle R. was feasting on mosquito stew. He finally got out by climbing up the chimney (the fire below helped speed him along). Eventually he moved to Blind River, Ontario and opened a lumberyard/delicatessen. In 1912 he was devoured by termites.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 17 Nov 13 - 07:47 AM

I get it now, SRS. Dunno why I didn't clue in on placing the lasagna in a cold oven. DOH! Enjoy yer scoff.

Sobeys is not expensive if you are a smart shopper. I am a regular at three grocery stores, the others being The Real Atlantic Superstore and the Coop. I buy eggs and certain other goods at Costco but I only go there when required on accounta it's so friggin busy. I read the weekly fliers on Wednesday and the sales start Thursday. It is extremely seldom that I buy anything not "on sale". I buy certain things at certain times of year. This is especially so in fall because crops are being harvested, beef cattle are being barned, etc. I buy my Xmas turkey when the turkey war is on. Every now and then, something unexpected happens. Like that there Italian fellah that said he'd never have gay people in his adverts. Last week, his pasta was selling for 99p a pound. Sobeys had a deal on Air Miles Cash spending... use $20 Air Miles Cash get 25 Air Miles (= $2.62). Pasta keeps well and even better if you plastic it and put it in the old US fridge downstairs. 21 pounds of of lasagna, spaghetti, macaroni, etc, should last me a while.

As for the gift cards, I expect $3000 will last about 16 months at present prices. If Her Majesty becomes whimsical again and decides that she and her old pals, including Barack, might have a bit of fun bombing the shit out of Iran, or Syria, or... my estmate would, of course, be adjusted downward. With a term of 16 months, I will still average a 5% ROR on my investment and that includes an allowance for the pittance of interest I would earn if I left the money in my TFSA (Tax Free Savings Account) at the Bank of Nova Scotia. I AM a smart shopper.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Nov 13 - 01:56 AM

The lasagna is wrapped in foil and is put back into the Pyrex© pan it was formed in. If I put it in the cold oven then turn on the oven the whole thing heats more gradually and the pan doesn't break. I wouldn't put a glass pan with a frozen lasagna into a hot oven.

What are you going to do with all of those gift cards? I Googled Sobeys - even an expensive food store, it will take you a long time to use all of those cards.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Nov 13 - 11:21 PM

He could do two round-trips to Portland, ME. Or go 1,399 miles to St. Louis. Those distances are "as the crow flies."

Of course, a lot depends on the airline the miles are good on. There's a difference between, say, Air Canada and Air Saskatchewan. Not much, perhaps, but some.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Nov 13 - 11:16 PM

He's more than a librarian--he's an entire library!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Nov 13 - 04:50 PM

There's Trono, an Otwa, an Mnreall, an Halfax, an even Sandrews. My question is: if you divide 1,425 into an outgoing and a return, do they kick you off the plane a half mile short each way? Or a mile short on the return? Is the plane still in the air when they do this or do they land and make you walk half a mile to the terminal and (I presume) your luggage? If he wanted a one-way he might to Moose Jaw or Regina or someplace on Baffin Island.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 16 Nov 13 - 07:27 AM

So where can you get to (and presumably get back from, unless we're gonna get some jokes about one-way tickets...) within 713 miles and how much does a return flight cost?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 16 Nov 13 - 07:10 AM

SRS... metal pan, I hope. I have heard stories of glass pans used thusly exploding even if they were used thusly previously. In any case, I have found the best way is to thaw such in the fridge for a couple of days first or to heat them slowly at a temp below boiling for a few hours and crank up the oven for the 40 minutes or so. I gave up following "cook from frozen" directions long ago on accounta I wants er HOT! buddy.

So, I'm up yer Sobeys yesserday fer ta get gift cards counta Sobeys put on that deal where ya get 95 Air Miles fer every $200 in gift cards right? That's $10 so that's 5%. And, soon as ya spend a dollar, that's more n 5% per yer annum eh? Even if ya buy a GeezlyIC at the Bank a Nova Scotia and lock up yer dollar fer five years ya only get 2.3%. Now, I might be just a good ol Kent County boy but I knows a good investment when I sees one. Smart shopper eh? Eh? I mean, ya gotta eat, right?

So, I says to the lass that I wants some $200 gift cards, 15. She comes back with two. I ask, she says, "You said a $200 card and a $15 card. No… I wants 15 $200 cards. She says, "Gift cards come in $10, $15, $20, $50, $100 and $200. How many of each do you want?" I says I wants 15 $200 gift cards. Blank stare. Like a deer lookin at a lantern just before the loud noise, which is what came to mind at the time as I was getting kinda annoyed. I says I wants $3000 of $200 gift cards… that would be 15 $200 cards… $3000 in total. She had a look on her face like a deer after the loud noise. She said, "I'll have to call the supervisor…" and she proceeded to explain why.

Shelly, the super on duty, was about three cashes over, setting out cash stuff. Says I, "Shelly!" and gives her a c'mere nod. Like a hello nod but with a sideways inflection added. Niceties exchanged, I says I wants 15 $200 gift cards. Beboop, beboop with the super code and the super card and she says to the lass, "Go ahead." The lass talked about how nobody has ever asked for that many cards before and other similar yak whilst she processed my request. Me, I counted the cards as she put them though. 1425 Air Miles are mine.

There's an old song… Jesus put his money in the Bank of Nova Scotia, And he never ever ever got it back. I guess he wasn't a good ol Kent County boy. Probly shopped at yer Real Atlantic Stupidstore too eh?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Nov 13 - 04:47 AM

You are a walking talking symbol generator in your own Right, sir!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Nov 13 - 12:21 AM

I found a hibernating lasagne in my freezer yesterday. Must have snuck in last week before the cold weather when the back door was standing open. Quite a feat, a lasagna sneaking through the yard past three dogs. I was told the best way to revive this little guy (also 9x9) is to put it in a 350o oven for about 90 minutes (straight from the freezer into the oven).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Nov 13 - 03:23 PM

I have no need of a symbol generator, for I AM a symbol -- of all that is good and beautiful in the Universe.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 15 Nov 13 - 12:10 PM

I used to love SSG. A real handy tool.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 15 Nov 13 - 11:46 AM

10C for the next few days with lots of sunshine so I just might BBQ a big spaghetti and bacon scoff. I can smell the aroma just thinkin about it. Must see if I have any SSG... slugs are to heavy fer spaghetti huntin. Juuuust jokin. Of course I have SSG.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Nov 13 - 09:57 AM

They're a nuisance out here and there's open season on lasagnas all year 'round. No license required, but you gotta report a really big one to Fish & Game.

Gonna have some tonight down at the big lasagna barbecue at the Elks Lodge. We got the liquor license and everything, so y'all come on over. Deb's cookin' so it should be good!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 15 Nov 13 - 06:42 AM

I assume the reference is to Hamish, A.

I was busy with other things, SRS. Thank goodness this is a team sport.

Looking at my white t-shirt makes me wonder why I didn't don my apron when I cooked the lasagna yesterday. Still, it wouldn't have covered the right sleeve. I dunno about your lasagnas but ours put up quite a fight and this one was a just small one... 9X9.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Nov 13 - 04:15 AM

I can only suppose that the "New Face" referred to is Mister R's assertion of humility. I supposer further that this is not actually all that new. But he usually wears his first face.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Nov 13 - 01:57 AM

MOM, you're getting awfully close to dangling your toes in that yucky old swamp water. Here's a boost up out of harm's way. What are those boys thinking, leaving you to wander around here at the bottom of the yard so late at night?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Nov 13 - 02:31 PM

Aha! A new face. Or a new old face. Welcome! Or Welcome Back, whichever!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Nov 13 - 09:55 AM

To listen to SOME people you'd think hockey was a religion and Don Cherry was God. Of course, that's not so. Hockey is a distraction from The Truth, a vile primrose path to perdition and damnation, and Don Cherry is Eternal Evil (pronounced "EEEE-vil"). I would tell you The Truth about the Creator Of All, the Supreme Being, but I am all-humble and my omnihumility prevents me, lest you think I'm bragging.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Nov 13 - 09:49 AM

DO what is right ina ll you do. In your heart.

That's what she said.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 14 Nov 13 - 06:13 AM

I might attend if St. Bernard's would put on a wing and a prayer night. And they'd be sure to get a crowd if they got a big screen for Thursday night football.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Nov 13 - 12:27 AM

The Jesuits thought the whole world was their cloister. But cloister is as cloister does, I always say. BEtter than a boke int he eye with a sharp sacrament.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,laptopgnu
Date: 13 Nov 13 - 10:09 PM

Humour is lost when I post from the lappytop. Maybe I should convent. Do not be the first to Jesuit lest you be Jesuit first.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Nov 13 - 09:27 PM

Jesuits aren't cloistered. Trappists, maybe, but not Jesuits. The bloody POPE is a bloody Jesuit!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 13 Nov 13 - 09:02 PM

Rap... yes. Jesuit.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Nov 13 - 07:18 PM

gnu, I didn't know you were ever in a cloister. Monks or nuns?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 13 Nov 13 - 06:43 PM

Hamish... ahhh... cloistered eh? I understand.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Hamish
Date: 13 Nov 13 - 04:06 PM

Oh, I dunno... just sort of got out of the habit (as the nun said to the...)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Nov 13 - 02:45 PM

Drive to the nearest aerodrome. Have your truck put on an airplane and flown to airport coded "PIH." I'll take it from there; have the airplane wait so it can take the truck home. After that, feel free to drive it anywhere and don't worry about the play in the master cylinder, it will go away soon.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 13 Nov 13 - 02:18 PM

Hamish. Long time no see. Waz new?

Rap... you can fix BRAKES? I have a Ford F150. When can I bring it in? I'll need a ride back to the office and subsequent return ride in yer Customer Courtesy Van, tho. Wait a minute! If you could fix Ford brakes, ya wouldn't have the time ta be postin at Mudcat. I think yer ly... stretchin the truth just a wee tad here eh? Hmmmmm?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Nov 13 - 10:50 AM

Just because there's a Moab in Utah doesn't mean we couldn't have one in California, too! Californians are like that--when they see something nice somewhere else, they immediately want to buy one and take it home with them.

Welcome back, Sir Hamish. Where he' ye roamed all this long time?



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Nov 13 - 09:35 AM

There's already a MOAB in Utah. We could rename it "Mother" or "Khandu" or even "Bullville" though. Are you thinking of running it as a cult-like place, Amos? It would make a nice retirement community for old folkers, and people we don't like we could just fix the brakes on their cars and, well, let them drive.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Hamish
Date: 13 Nov 13 - 07:51 AM

I've been away for ages. Back now.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 13 Nov 13 - 07:02 AM

I'll throw in a sawbuck.

Today, traffic on the two main arterials which vee to either side of me about 400m from me will be heavy. I am in the midst of the largest shopping district in NB. It's catchment area includes most of NB, all of PEI and a large portion of NS. Yesterday, in the wind, rain and wet flurries, I was silly enough to attempt to go to Costco (Price Club) just before noon for eggs and to scout the Kissmeass crap as I figured it might not be terribly crowded. Silly me. I only got close enough to see the lineups of vehicles trying to get into the parking lot and turned frightened and sped away. I went back just before 5 and only had to stand at the check out for 15 minutes but I got my free half dozen Omega 3 eggs and a 1 kg Vito's lasagna. The lasagna alone is worth the wait. Mum's fav. It is now sunny and I expect this opening day of the new Target store located about 300m from me will create vehicular chaos. I think I'll head out for groceries sooner than later. So, if you want anything, you had better let me know sooner than later.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Nov 13 - 12:53 AM

I am suggesting that we buy this little town. We could rename it MOAB and elect Joe Offer as Mayor. It has a owrking distillery, resort, and restaurant. What more could we possibly need? What could possibly go worng? :D


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Nov 13 - 05:59 PM

I'll clear the counter and get out the cutting boards. Any of you want to come over to cut up veggies to freeze this evening? I spent a couple of hours in the garden this morning picking lots of buckets of stuff. It's supposed to freeze overnight. Hot peppers, green peppers, sweet peppers - lots of peppers.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Nov 13 - 04:38 PM

Your relatives in Dangle WERE wasted. They were hanged, beheaded, drawn, quartered, castrated, burnt at the stake, shot by their neighbours, boiled in oil, buried alive, drowned, and what remained was sprayed with disinfectant. The ground they had occupied was scraped down to bare rock and the soil itself exorcised before being made into bricks for a pigsty. The rocks were sowed with salt and all traces of the McBrides of Dangle erased from all records of Ireland, England, Scotland, Wales, Cornwall, Brittany, the Isle of Man, and the rest of Europe. Did you know that the ship carrying the McBrides who escaped put them ashore on an island between Prince Charles Island and the Melville Peninsula? That they were rescued by Yu'piks who took pity on them, believing that no human beings could be as miserable and wretched a lot as these were? That after doing their rescuers dirty -- VERY dirty -- they were taken up by a British prison ship and eventually wandered into Blind River? That they were only accepted in Blind River because there was a need for people to stir the sludge in the waste water treatment plant by hand and/or wading in it for twenty-five cents a month and all they could eat, and at that they were overpaid? Are you aware of the "Let's Finish the McBrides" Act passed in Ireland last month and currently in the offices of the Irish Secret Service, the infamous, deadly and ubiquitous Táin Bó Cúailnge?

Just remember their motto: "If you run, you'll only die tired."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 12 Nov 13 - 12:15 PM

Youse flipheads don't never stop, do you(se?)? Whatta buncha flippin' LOOSERS!!! I had a grate flippin' day on REEmemberance Day, eh? There was a big flippin' parade of the old rinkly dudes in their flippin' yuneifroms down the main streat and I bummed a lotta cigs and got a cupple of free beers too. They otta have this day more times then just onset in a year, you ask me. Almost as good as Saint Patrick's Day! I bet the rellatives over in Dangle got totally flippin' WASTED!

- Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Nov 13 - 10:52 AM

NAMING OF PARTS
    Henry Reed

To-day we have naming of parts. Yesterday,
We had daily cleaning. And to-morrow morning,
We shall have what to do after firing. But to-day,
To-day we have naming of parts. Japonica
Glistens like coral in all of the neighboring gardens,
          And to-day we have naming of parts.

This is the lower sling swivel. And this
Is the upper sling swivel, whose use you will see,
When you are given your slings. And this is the piling swivel,
Which in your case you have not got. The branches
Hold in the gardens their silent, eloquent gestures,
          Which in our case we have not got.

This is the safety-catch, which is always released
With an easy flick of the thumb. And please do not let me
See anyone using his finger. You can do it quite easy
If you have any strength in your thumb. The blossoms
Are fragile and motionless, never letting anyone see
          Any of them using their finger.

And this you can see is the bolt. The purpose of this
Is to open the breech, as you see. We can slide it
Rapidly backwards and forwards: we call this
Easing the spring. And rapidly backwards and forwards
The early bees are assaulting and fumbling the flowers:
          They call it easing the Spring.

They call it easing the Spring: it is perfectly easy
If you have any strength in your thumb: like the bolt,
And the breech, and the cocking-piece, and the point of balance,
Which in our case we have not got; and the almond-blossom
Silent in all of the gardens and the bees going backwards and forwards,
          For to-day we have naming of parts.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 12 Nov 13 - 05:54 AM

Die? Who said anything about dying? Cept Rap but we know he's just a big ol teddy bear. Armed to the teeth, mind, but still, as long as he takes his meds, we're perfectly safe. Nothing can go wrong.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Nov 13 - 12:01 AM

Edward Shillito


Hardness of Heart


In the first watch no death but made us mourn;
Now tearless eyes run down the daily roll,
Whose names are written in the book of death;
For sealed are now the springs of tears, as when
The tropic sun makes dry the torrent's course
After the rains. They are too many now
For mortal eyes to weep, and none can see
But God alone the Thing itself and live.
We look to seaward, and behold a cry!
To skyward, and they fall as stricken birds
On autumn fields; and earth cries out its toll,
From the Great River to the world's end--toll
Of dead, and maimed and lost; we dare not stay;
Tears are not endless and we have no more.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Nov 13 - 11:53 PM

A gift from thee to me
Is Forty Nine of K and Three:

Bent double, like old beggars under sacks,
Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge,
Till on the haunting flares we turned our backs
And towards our distant rest began to trudge.

Men marched asleep. Many had lost their boots
But limped on, blood-shod. All went lame; all blind;
Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots
Of tired, outstripped Five-Nines that dropped behind.

Gas! Gas! Quick, boys! - An ecstasy of fumbling,
Fitting the clumsy helmets just in time;
But someone still was yelling out and stumbling
And flound'ring like a man in fire or lime.......

Dim, through the misty panes and thick green light,
As under a green sea, I saw him drowning.
In all my dreams, before my helpless sight,
He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning.

If in some smothering dreams you too could pace
Behind the wagon that we flung him in,
And watch the white eyes writhing in his face,
His hanging face, like a devil's sick of sin;

If you could hear, at every jolt, the blood
Come gargling from the froth-corrupted lungs,
Obscene as cancer, bitter as the cud
Of vile, incurable sores on innocent tongues, -

My friend, you would not tell with such high zest
To children ardent for some desperate glory,
The old Lie: Dulce et decorum est
Pro patria mori.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Nov 13 - 11:27 PM

Never mind, Sham. I realize now that there wouldn't be anything to squirt out, so I've cancelled my tickets to Blind River. Besides, as I've said before I think you might be a relative and I don't like squeezing the heads of relatives because the carpet stains depress me so much that I have to buy a new carpet.

But I'll leave you with this thought. Have a good day, Sham.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Nov 13 - 03:36 PM

So you finally got out of jail, eh? Sham, I was wondering: did you make any new "friends" in there or was it the same old circle of jerks?

Yeah, Sham, it's Rememberance Day in Canada and other places; in the US it's called "Veterans Day." Now, Sham, I'm a veteran -- people shot at me and all that combat stuff happened. And Sham -- I've got PTSD. I don't LIKE people to dis me. It makes me angry...really angry...so angry that I want to squeeze the pimple those people have for a head just to see the pop and watch the stuff squirt out. Would you like that, Sham? Would you?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 11 Nov 13 - 02:31 PM

Hey, Rap....you there? It is flippin' Rememberance Day in Canada, eh? So I thot I wood remember you, eh? But then I got thinkin' no....I would rather DISmember you! Ha! Ha! So I got a little rememberance Day wish for you, okay? Here it comes....























FLIP OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!

- Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Nov 13 - 12:54 PM

T.S. Eliot reading The Wasteland


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Nov 13 - 10:19 AM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S_ogmLOR7Ac


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