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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

gnu 18 Sep 11 - 07:10 PM
Rapparee 18 Sep 11 - 03:54 PM
Amos 18 Sep 11 - 10:41 AM
Acme 18 Sep 11 - 10:14 AM
Rapparee 17 Sep 11 - 11:59 PM
Amos 17 Sep 11 - 11:06 PM
Acme 17 Sep 11 - 10:32 PM
Amos 17 Sep 11 - 11:16 AM
Rapparee 17 Sep 11 - 10:25 AM
Acme 17 Sep 11 - 09:34 AM
Amos 17 Sep 11 - 12:14 AM
Acme 16 Sep 11 - 11:59 PM
Rapparee 16 Sep 11 - 10:16 PM
Rapparee 16 Sep 11 - 09:01 PM
Amos 16 Sep 11 - 08:40 PM
Amos 16 Sep 11 - 01:54 PM
Amos 16 Sep 11 - 10:26 AM
Acme 16 Sep 11 - 10:09 AM
Rapparee 16 Sep 11 - 10:07 AM
Acme 15 Sep 11 - 11:17 PM
Little Hawk 15 Sep 11 - 11:11 PM
Amos 15 Sep 11 - 10:30 PM
Rapparee 15 Sep 11 - 10:16 PM
Amos 15 Sep 11 - 11:38 AM
Rapparee 15 Sep 11 - 10:10 AM
Amos 15 Sep 11 - 09:18 AM
Rapparee 14 Sep 11 - 10:32 PM
Amos 14 Sep 11 - 06:24 PM
Rapparee 14 Sep 11 - 05:11 PM
Amos 14 Sep 11 - 04:59 PM
gnu 14 Sep 11 - 02:31 PM
Amos 14 Sep 11 - 01:25 PM
gnu 14 Sep 11 - 12:25 PM
Rapparee 14 Sep 11 - 10:08 AM
Amos 14 Sep 11 - 10:02 AM
Acme 14 Sep 11 - 09:40 AM
Rapparee 13 Sep 11 - 11:08 PM
gnu 13 Sep 11 - 06:31 PM
Acme 13 Sep 11 - 06:09 PM
Rapparee 13 Sep 11 - 04:02 PM
Acme 13 Sep 11 - 11:50 AM
Amos 13 Sep 11 - 10:25 AM
Eiseley 13 Sep 11 - 09:39 AM
Rapparee 13 Sep 11 - 08:30 AM
Rapparee 12 Sep 11 - 11:18 PM
Acme 12 Sep 11 - 09:27 PM
Rapparee 12 Sep 11 - 09:25 PM
gnu 12 Sep 11 - 09:12 PM
Rapparee 12 Sep 11 - 07:18 PM
Amos 12 Sep 11 - 11:16 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 18 Sep 11 - 07:10 PM

Quittin smokin is rough... I am sooooo pissed off... just wanna kill somethin. And I haven't even quit yet. I just did the final prep today for tomorrow which is my quit date as I weighed in just under 180# today (that's just over 100 #s of weight loss over two years) and a close relative knew about it and she did something to piss me off when she found out, for NO reason that I can imagine. Why do they do that? Seriously, I am fucking pissed off that she would... breathe in thru the nose and out thru the mouth... ommmmm.... ommmmMYGODIAMPISSED!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Sep 11 - 03:54 PM

When Stilly was a young woman
And her kids had gone off from her side
She found a spot, a jolly little spot
Over on the old North Side
It sloped down toward the Stilly, from River Avenue
Stilly said that it would give her
Such a lovely view
So she took a look in the Greenhouse Book
To see what she could find
And she found a house, a jolly greenhouse,
With a locking door in front
And a solid wall behind.

Now, Stilly was a handy woman
Who never wasted any time
She found she knew just what to do
With concrete, plexiglass, and time.
She said, "I'll build some big shelves in there, where petunias can perch.
"And I'll sit there myself on Sunday mornings
"When everybody else has gone to church."
The neighbors said, "She's crazy in the head
"She's surely lost her mind."
But she built that house, that jolly greenhouse,
With a locking door in front
And a solid wall behind.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Sep 11 - 10:41 AM

Here's a toast to Stilly's greenhouse!
Such a fine house! Not a mean house!
It provides her with fine greenery
WIth which she doth improve the scenery!

D. Seuusse
Stilly's Green House
"Nonsense for our Mother", Berkeley Addled Press, 1968


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 18 Sep 11 - 10:14 AM

Have some tea, MOM. And stick around, later on I'm going to make some banana bread and a batch of bread pudding. Thanks to various folks who helped me put my greenhouse up.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Sep 11 - 11:59 PM

I remember being conscious once....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Sep 11 - 11:06 PM

Hurray for MOM'S CONSCIOUSNESS!! Where would we be without it?

Or, it without us?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Sep 11 - 10:32 PM

MOM! MOM! Wake up! You've nearly slipped into a coma below the line.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Sep 11 - 11:16 AM

YEs, ma'a'm, I have to in order to get back to work at a reasonable date. I might well drive through next year, though depending on the intervening events.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Sep 11 - 10:25 AM

Yes, I'd like that.

And Stilly, I've had dates lots of times. They're quite tasty in date-nut bread, for instance.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Sep 11 - 09:34 AM

I suppose you're flying, Amos? No chance of passing through Fort Worth on a drive east?

Hey, it RAINED here last night! 1-2 inches.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Sep 11 - 12:14 AM

Jolly good. I will be pulling out Monday morning and if need be I can make it as early as necessary. I suppose you want to be there by 8:30? My early-rise penalty fee will be included in your tab. No worries!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Sep 11 - 11:59 PM

Oh, dear. They have a date. Now what is the world coming to?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Sep 11 - 10:16 PM

Quality Inn Suites
815 Elkridge Landing Rd
Linthicum Hgts, MD

Directions to Our Hotel:

I-95 to I-195E take Exit 1A, go two traffic lights and turn left at Terminal Rd. At the next light, make a left at Elkridge Landing Rd. Travel approximately 3/4 of a mile and at the first light take a right onto West Nursery Road. Hotel is the first building on the left.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Sep 11 - 09:01 PM

I have a flight at 10:15 am on Monday, Oct. 3. When do you plan to leave St. David's?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Sep 11 - 08:40 PM

I love Maria Muldaur singing "I'm a Woooooman!".

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Sep 11 - 01:54 PM

And once again, dear Rapparree, how do you expect me to find you on Getaway Friday?

You need to put in some of the ffort here, pal!!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Sep 11 - 10:26 AM

In respect to Gov Rick, the verb is petée!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Sep 11 - 10:09 AM

Perried? Perrier? Petouui!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Sep 11 - 10:07 AM

Of course you were bushed! But now you're Pettied, or whatever his name is. You're in Texas.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Sep 11 - 11:17 PM

Bushed after working on the plastic greenhouse. After a lot of lifting and pushing we managed to get the roof sections into place. Soon I'll have a delightful little greenhouse that can double as a dog house if any of you need to find a refuge when MOM locks the door and won't let you in if you come in stinking too late for her to be bothered to come down to let you in.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Sep 11 - 11:11 PM

The Neverheardofit Motel? Cool. I think Chongo stayed at that place a couple of times when he was on the road. They've got them all across the eastern USA, don't they?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Sep 11 - 10:30 PM

All right, all right. I got stuck out of the time stream for a bit, and afore I knew it someone had run two weeks by me. So?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Sep 11 - 10:16 PM

If you show up for Getaway next month you might be singing solo.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Sep 11 - 11:38 AM

That's what they all say. Everything is Now, Now, Now. Sheeshe!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Sep 11 - 10:10 AM

Actually, it's this month.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Sep 11 - 09:18 AM

Besides we can't have any bad blood between us if I am going to pick you up at the Neverheardofit Motel in Maryland or maybe DC or Virginia next month.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Sep 11 - 10:32 PM

Well, okay then. I'd sure hate to have to do something about it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Sep 11 - 06:24 PM

Now, Rapp, why would I want to do that? You know I hate competition!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Sep 11 - 05:11 PM

Are you sayin' something bad about me? Are ya? Ya know what we folks out this-a-way have to do when ya do that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Sep 11 - 04:59 PM

I think I know where that drop of Super Glue could best be applied...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 14 Sep 11 - 02:31 PM

That's "gnu" to you mister. Lower case "g" if you will, lest I be taken as one who puts on airs.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Sep 11 - 01:25 PM

Your linearity is fading with age, good Manne of Booqies.


Backwards " Era we began is a goner " begins "re no gas in age be ware..." Which if you look is how the palindrome I cite begins. But Gnu has the rights of it, The characters are dense and the plot is indecipherable.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 14 Sep 11 - 12:25 PM

I found the plots hard to follow.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Sep 11 - 10:08 AM

Can't be. Backwards it starts:

ner oga sin ageb ewar ewar (etc.)

That might be SoCalese, but it ain't not no English.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Sep 11 - 10:02 AM

Palindromic masterpiece from the New Yorker:

RE: NO GAS IN AGE? BEWARE.Warren, old as sin, am red. Lost—or reviled—a female. (No, a hag!) Elder, it passes old lot. Fossil. Lip sags, eh? Flesh sags. Poor devil! At one, nips.A store, cafe, zoo. "Pops." No, is elder, has gas till it's late. Menace. No bristle, few warts on nose. Hoots. Peels, eh? Park, late: talk, rap. He sleeps, too. (He's on no straw.We felt, sir: Bone. Cane. Metal.) Still, it sags. Ah! Red lesions pop, ooze. Face rots. A spine, not alive, droops. Gash self? He's (gasp) ill, is soft, old, loses sap, tired. Leg? Aha, one lame! Fade. Liver rots. Older man is sad loner, raw. Era we began is a goner


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Sep 11 - 09:40 AM

Keep in place, Rap, use a drop of SuperGlue once you zip it up.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Sep 11 - 11:08 PM

No, I make sure I'm zipped up before I leave the house.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 13 Sep 11 - 06:31 PM

That's leavin the barn door open.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Sep 11 - 06:09 PM

I tell you, it is a different world out there.

I think he's hinting more at an Arthur Dent sort of world rather than Uranus.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Sep 11 - 04:02 PM

A different world? Saturn? Uranus? Mars?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Sep 11 - 11:50 AM

It is, indeed!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Sep 11 - 10:25 AM

Cool is as cool does, dudes and dudettes.

Stay tuned for a new American Icon of Literature, just as soon as I can get the Tweet--FB--Google+ links up and running. Oy!! I tell you, it is a different world out there.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 13 Sep 11 - 09:39 AM

Happy birthday yesterday, Amos!

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Sep 11 - 08:30 AM

HEY! Mom! Roll outa that gutter -- Amos is back in the drunk tank.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Sep 11 - 11:18 PM

Spill chuck sift wear ice on lee ass gut ass thee sift wear righter. Hugh no dot.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Sep 11 - 09:27 PM

Don't start another banking crisis by pulling it all out at once, Amos. Pace yourself. Please. The House and Senate and President Obama implore you. (Geez. Can you believe that the spell check doesn't have Obama? It offers Obadiah, Obadias, Bamako, or Alabama.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Sep 11 - 09:25 PM

eah. He was even cooler the only time he had the helm and his ship ended up marooned on an ice shelf in the Antarctic. Ever eat penguin for months on end? Penguin and ice water, penguin and ice water...that was one of the reasons Amos left the life of a sailor behind him. That and some stuff in Papettee involving a walrus, a young woman, and a peg-legged parrot named "Papettee Petey."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 12 Sep 11 - 09:12 PM

Truth? Truth is A is a oool guy. And, being a cool guy is all any of us can ever hope to be. George Carlin defined it as such and George Carlin is my go to guy for a lot of times... my Deity in a way... my God on earth... so, if he says being a cool guy is what he and WE want to be in the end, A has it made in the shade. A is just a cool guy.

Now, don't get uppity eh A... you ain't no better than the rest of us eh. But... yer a cool guy. Happy Bday.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Sep 11 - 07:18 PM

Why, thank ya kindly, Amos. I try never to let facts and details interfere with the truth.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Sep 11 - 11:16 AM

Pretty good job, Rapp. Covered all the important points, and only messed up the details and facts.

I am pleased to report there is still such a thing as a really good restaurant experience to be had in California. Birthday dinner at Ruth's Chris restaurant across from the Maritime Mueseum, looking out over the harbor. Friendly, courteous, intelligent, impeccable appointments, and terrific service, and the best filet I've ever eaten. Seriously fine dining. So now I am a year older. And free to liquidate my IRA! Watch out world!! :D


A


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