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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Bee-dubya-ell 06 Dec 09 - 09:44 PM
Ed T 06 Dec 09 - 09:41 PM
Rapparee 06 Dec 09 - 09:20 PM
Ed T 06 Dec 09 - 09:15 PM
Rapparee 06 Dec 09 - 09:12 PM
Ed T 06 Dec 09 - 09:09 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 06 Dec 09 - 09:06 PM
Ed T 06 Dec 09 - 09:04 PM
Acme 06 Dec 09 - 09:00 PM
Little Hawk 06 Dec 09 - 08:49 PM
Rapparee 06 Dec 09 - 08:44 PM
GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River 06 Dec 09 - 08:28 PM
Amos 06 Dec 09 - 07:57 PM
Little Hawk 06 Dec 09 - 07:24 PM
Rapparee 06 Dec 09 - 07:20 PM
Ed T 06 Dec 09 - 04:50 PM
Amos 06 Dec 09 - 04:36 PM
Amos 06 Dec 09 - 04:33 PM
Acme 06 Dec 09 - 03:12 PM
GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River 06 Dec 09 - 02:25 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 06 Dec 09 - 02:20 PM
GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River 06 Dec 09 - 02:11 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 06 Dec 09 - 02:07 PM
Amos 06 Dec 09 - 01:59 PM
Amos 06 Dec 09 - 12:36 PM
Rapparee 06 Dec 09 - 12:31 PM
Amos 06 Dec 09 - 11:23 AM
Little Hawk 06 Dec 09 - 03:31 AM
Amos 05 Dec 09 - 11:44 PM
Little Hawk 05 Dec 09 - 11:19 PM
Amos 05 Dec 09 - 10:54 PM
Amos 05 Dec 09 - 10:02 PM
Amos 05 Dec 09 - 09:51 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 05 Dec 09 - 08:38 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 05 Dec 09 - 08:33 PM
Amos 05 Dec 09 - 07:52 PM
Little Hawk 05 Dec 09 - 07:34 PM
gnu 05 Dec 09 - 07:26 PM
Rapparee 05 Dec 09 - 07:24 PM
Amos 05 Dec 09 - 07:09 PM
Amos 05 Dec 09 - 07:02 PM
Ed T 05 Dec 09 - 06:39 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 05 Dec 09 - 06:25 PM
Amos 05 Dec 09 - 05:13 PM
Acme 05 Dec 09 - 04:44 PM
Little Hawk 05 Dec 09 - 12:02 PM
Ed T 05 Dec 09 - 11:08 AM
Rapparee 05 Dec 09 - 10:47 AM
Ed T 05 Dec 09 - 10:13 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 05 Dec 09 - 09:34 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 09:44 PM

Ah, the Klein bottle! The only thing Gluon will drink from. Nothing ol' Gluon enjoys more than a Klein bagel washed down with a Klein bottle full of Denebian Ditchwater.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ed T
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 09:41 PM

Shane's favourite pick up line:
"Nice melons on U, U'r ham hocks and snout ain't too shabby eider"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 09:20 PM

Good lard and hamhocks, man! Not even his doctor wants anything to do with Shame's bottom unless s/he's in a heavy-duty, air-supplied, hazmat suit. Angels hold umbrellas over Shame when it rains because God doesn't want his run-off polluting Lake Huron and killing all the fish clear out to the Grand Banks.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ed T
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 09:15 PM

"Shane's all hangover, he's got a mouth full of cotton
Guess he's arrived this must be his bottom"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 09:12 PM

Nah, nowhere near it because there is no bottom. Mother MOAB is more like a Klein bottle than a Mason jar.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ed T
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 09:09 PM

"Doodle do do doo, a doodle do do doo
A doodle do do doo doodle doodle do do doo,
I guess we've arrived this must be the bottom"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 09:06 PM

High C? The time Don flushed his stash down the toilet he hit G above high C.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ed T
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 09:04 PM

"If this is the bottom, well OK, I figured we'd get there someday"....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 09:00 PM

you're still a catrato,

Hmmm. We have a cat at our house, but not a "catrato."

I bet Rapaire was calling Shane a "castrato," and entirely different creature entirely. Now hit high C, please. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 08:49 PM

Oh dear...

This is not good.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 08:44 PM

Shame Aleister McBride! You stop talking that way to your betters! And you be glad you're an Aleister and not a Eunuch. I mean, you're still a catrato, a little creep who can't count above ten without taking off your shoes and God knows, if you did that Environment Canada would declare all of Ontario a toxic waste disaster.

On a lighter subject, I noticed in the Toronto newspaper that Jennifer Dana, of the Ontario Provincial Police, is getting married.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 08:28 PM

You are gonna flippin' DIE, Liddle Hawk!

- Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 07:57 PM

The noble Rapaire only want his grisly history to be honored in the abstract. Meanwhile the scurrilous Leedle Hack asserts he is. himself, an unimpeachable source, whereas it is a matter of historical record that he is eminently impeachable and his veracity has been repeatedly impeached here on this very proving ground!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 07:24 PM

LOL! Not true! His middle name is Aleister. He swears he'll kill anyone who reveals it, because he finds it very embarrassing. Shane Aleister McBride. You heard it here on December 6, 2009 from an unimpeachable source.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 07:20 PM

The noble Rapaire would take umbrage at these purported "Wits" but he never fights with unarmed men.

The noble Rapaire will, however, point out that Shame has neither the education nor the balls to do whatever he was going to hire done himself. In fact, his middle name (now revealed for the first time!) is Eunuch. Shame Eunuch McBride of Blind River. Of course, Shame never uses his middle name (nor his surname for that matter) since he can barely spell his first name (which he thinks is and signs as "X").


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ed T
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 04:50 PM

Looks like the last election in Iraq...Was Rapaire there?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 04:36 PM

Rapaire tries to influence the election.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 04:33 PM

The Legionairres discuss Rapaire's merits as a candidate


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 03:12 PM

Great breakfast this morning, MOM! Those buttermilk pancakes with strawberry syrup were spectacular!

Don't worry about all of that sticky syrup on the table. I'm sure one of the dogs will come along and lick it up.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 02:25 PM

I do not believe he is even in that pitcher. Not one of 'em looks stoopid enuff to be him. If I could get aholt of them guys somehow I would hire 'em to go down to Ida-flippin'-ho and put a flippin' end to Rapoop. They look like they could flippin' do the job to me.

- Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 02:20 PM

Naw! He's the one wearin' a hat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 02:11 PM

He is the one standin' beside the guy with the hat that says "I'm With the IDIOT ---->".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 02:07 PM

Rapaire's the one with the rifle.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 01:59 PM

Rapaire Joins the Legionne. The other members of the group are drunk. Can you tell which one is Rapaire?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 12:36 PM

YEah, well, don't be troubling my BS with facts now, Rapaire!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 12:31 PM

It would be a good trick indeed, since ol' Jerry F. is deader'n yesterday's want ads.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 11:23 AM

He could surely scare the be jeezus out of them, anyway. Sometimes I wish Chongo were Real.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Dec 09 - 03:31 AM

Well...perhaps he doesn't know any second-tier primates. ;-) I bet Chongo could enlighten the folks who gather around Jerry Falwell.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 11:44 PM

Falwell DELUDED? At leas he isn't militating for equal rights for second-tier primates! :D

Thanks for the kind remarks.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 11:19 PM

Amos, that passage you quoted from Robert A. Wilson about belief is brilliant! It expresses the matter perfectly, and I am printing out a copy of it to put on my wall here. Bravo!

*****

Asimov's comments on the post following are sensible enough...but hardly revelatory! He is merely stating the very obvious...that a just "God" would find an honest man preferable to a hypocrite. It seems to me, though, that a God worth venerating would save everyone, not just the people s(he) happens to like better! ;-) Only a God that is some kind of vengeful monster would send souls to eternal torment.

****

Falwell's comment holds no interest for me. I think he's deluded.

****

Gore Vidal is quite correct in what he says. What he said applies just as well to political faith, conventional medical faith as shown by many in our present medical establishment, or any other common kind of faith (meaing: belief) as it does to religious faith. They all tend to suppress inconvenient evidence and ignore contradictions within their own cherished set of assumptions. It is a key characteristic of how the human ego works...unless it becomes stringently honest and capable of engaging in real and honest self-criticism on a regular basis.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 10:54 PM

…if I were not an atheist, I would believe in a God who would choose to save people on the basis of the totality of their lives and not the pattern of their words. I think he would prefer an honest and righteous atheist to a TV preacher whose every word is God, God, God, and whose every deed is foul, foul, foul.
[Isaac Asimov, I. Asimov: A Memoir]

…If we are going to save America and evangelize the world, we cannot accommodate secular philosophies that are diametrically opposed to Christian truth…We need to pull out all the stops to recruit and train 25 million Americans to become informed pro-moral activists whose voices can be heard in the halls of Congress. I am convinced that America can be turned around if we will all get serious about the Master's business. It may be late, but it is never too late to do what is right. We need an old-fashioned, God-honoring, Christ-exalting revival to turn American back to God. America can be saved!
[Jerry Falwell, in the Moral Majority Report, September 1984.]

…in matters of faith, inconvenient evidence is always suppressed while contradictions go unnoticed.
Gore Vidal


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 10:02 PM

Seriously, LH, your quatrains are well-formed but they are built on a rotten premise.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 09:51 PM

Oh, how MOABY sitting pounding on the bloody keys
I would never stop 'til
Lit-tle
Hawk gave up his wheeze!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 08:38 PM

♫♫

All I want is a laptop kit,
With built-in wireless so I can sit,
And post BS while I take a shit!
Oh, wouldn't it be MOABy?

♫♫


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 08:33 PM

♫♫

All Amos wants is to be the one,
To post Thirty-three K and run.
It would be so much fun!
Oh, wouldn't it be MOABy?

♫♫


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 07:52 PM

Don't believe anything. Regard things on a scale of probabilities.
The things that seem most absurd, put under 'Low Probability', and
the things that seem most plausible, you put under 'High
Probability'. Never believe anything. Once you believe anything, you
stop thinking about it. The more things you believe, the less mental
activity. If you believe something, and have an opinion on every
subject, then your brain activity stops entirely, which is clinically
considered a sign of death, nowadays in medical practice. So put
things on a scale or probability, and never believe or disbelieve
anything entirely.

-Robert A. Wilson (interview with "innerview")


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 07:34 PM

As life drifted on toward a new dawn
And the Earth was slowly turning
From within the gloom of a distant room
A single lamp was burning
'Twas Amos, hunched before the light
Of a glimmering monitor screen
His eyes were bloodshot, his nerves were tight
His complexion was turning green
He was toiling, turning out the type
Of a poetic tour-de-force
He was trying to raise a frantic hype
For a number that lay on the course
And the number he flogged as he filled his blog
Was a number of which you may
Have sometimes heard, not the 23rd,
But the 33 of K
"Yes! The 33 of K!", he shrieked,
His whiskers did tremble so
And he blathered on without surcease
While the blustery winds did blow
In a ceaseless and mad cacophony
'Gainst the wall of his castle drear
And in the forests and fields around
The wild beasts shrank in fear
For upon him comes this madness
As the hour approaches fast
When the 33 of K will be nailed
To the Pequod's shivering mast
And abandon hope all ye aboard!
For the gleam in his raving eye
Presages a dire and terrible fate
For all who venture nigh
"'Tis the madness of 33K," they say
And then shrink away in dread
As Amos types on through the night to the dawn
Disdaining his rest and his bed
The man is possesed, that much is clear
He has little else to say
But to blather and blither, as forth we go thither
To the threshhold of 33 K


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 07:26 PM

Would ya take 40?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 07:24 PM

Jeez, Amos. Even YOU should know the Ultimate Answer by now, ferchrissake! It's 42.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 07:09 PM

Ah, the chain plates creaked and began to crack,
And the transom started to split,
ANd the bob-stays screamed like a hellion's dream
And the storm grew as dark as the Pit.
But we never flinched and we never turned
With a hundred and fifty to go,
We stood our watches one at a time
ANd let the damn storm blow.

Oh, our sides were sore and our ribs were bruised
And our fingers sore and bleeding
And our eyes were tight from the endless night
When the binnacle needed readin'.
But we limped below for an hour or so
And came back to the helm and the stay,
We wuz damned if we'd let this goddamned storm
Keep us short of our thirty-three kay.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 07:02 PM

You crack me up, BRuce!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ed T
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 06:39 PM

From 1700 BC....Distant sounds of a "Rapaire" in the making:

Heber and Heremon were the sons of Milesius of Spain and shortly after the death of their father, along with their six brothers, with a numerous fleet well manned and equipped, set forth from Breoghan's Tower or Brigantia (now Corunna) in Galicia, in Spain, and sailed prosperously to the coasts of Ireland or lnis-Fail, where they met many difficulties and various chances before they could land: occasioned by the diabolical arts, sorceries, and enchantments used by the Tuatha-de-Danann, to obstruct their landing; for, by their magic art, they enchanted the island so as to appear to the Milesians or Clan-na-Milé in the form of a Hog, and no way to come at it (whence the island, among the many other names it had before, was called "Muc-Inis or "The Hog Island"); and withal raised so great a storm, that the Milesian fleet was thereby totally dispersed and many of them cast away, wherein five of the eight brothers, sons of Milesius, lost their lives. That part of the fleet commanded by Heber, Heremon, and Amergin (the three surviving, brothers), and Heber Donn, son of Ir (one of the brothers lost in the storm), overcame all opposition, landed safe, fought and routed the three Tuatha-de Danann Kings at Slieve-Mis, and thence pursued and overtook them at Tailten, where another bloody battle was fought; wherein the three (Tuatha-de-Danann) Kings and their Queens were slain, and their army utterly routed and destroyed: so that they could never after give any opposition to the Clan-na-Milé in their new conquest; who, having thus sufficiently avenged the death of their great uncle Ithe (who had been slain by the inhabitants of Ireland), gained the possession of the country foretold them by Cachear, some ages past. Heber and Heremon, the chief leading men remaining of the eight brothers, sons of Milesius aforesaid, divided the kingdom between them (allotting a proportion of land to their brother Amergin, who was their Arch-priest, Druid, or magician; and to their nephew Heber Donn, and to the rest of their chief commanders), and became jointly the first of one hundred and eighty-three Kings or sole Monarchs of the Gaelic, Milesian, or Scottish Race, that ruled and governed Ireland, successively, for two thousand eight hundred and eighty-five years from the first year of their reign), Anno Mundi three thousand five hundred, to their submission to the Crown of England in the person of King Henry the Second; who, being also of the Milesian Race by Maude, his mother, was lineally descended from Fergus Mór MacEarca, first King of Scotland, who was descended from the said Heremon - so that the succession may be truly said to continue in the Milesian Blood from before Christ one thousand six hundred and ninety-nine years down to the present time.

And, after many centuaries, these events eventially begot the reigning rebel "Rapaire of MAOB"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 06:25 PM

Well, maybe the electrical storage units in your stuff are called "batteries", but the ones in my stuff are called "Henry, Frank, Lucille, Eloise, Bob, George, Mary, Jane, etc.". They get very upset if I call them "batteries" and insist on being addressed by name. And if I get their names wrong, they stop working. It's really a hassle 'cause they all look pretty much alike. I bought a 20-pack of AAs a few days ago and had to learn all their names before I even broke the seal on the package.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 05:13 PM

Rapaire: Well, it answers the question to a degree, but one that falls short of the ultimate Answer.

BTW, did you ever wonder why the electrical storage units in your cellphone and vibrator and toy bunny rabbit were called "batteries", which after all is a violent term? It was Ben Franklin's fault. He was playing with Leyden jars and discovered that (a) the charge was not in the conductor (water) but in the dielectric and (b) that they could be arranged in series. He called the series of Leyden jar cells a battery, borrowing the term from artillery conventions where several guns lined up in a row were called such.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 04:44 PM

MOM, the garden is kaput after the freeze. And the semester is almost over. I'm way behind in a bunch of stuff. I'm just going to sit here at the kitchen table and work and you guys just move around the room quietly, okay? And if I get tired of sitting, I'll take the wheelbarrow and clean up in the garden.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 12:02 PM

Boy, what an @$$hole that Ed the Sock is!!! LOL! For the first time I begin to see the tasteful side of Shane McBride...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ed T
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 11:08 AM

"If you don't have anything good to say... say it often" Quote....Ed the Sock

Inventions from Ed

http://www.edthesock.com/clips/eds_inventions.html


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 10:47 AM

Well, Amos, it varied. The PTSD was caused when the US Army made me see and do things that weren't very nice at all and that's why I need the therapy. The need for rotator cuff surgery was caused by a a fall I had in Boise when I lost my balance on the edge of a curb cut made for handicapped folks. The type 2 diabetes is under discussion, but it might very well have been brought on by exposure to dioxin-containing herbicides used along the DMZ in Korea.

Now, there's this scar on the outside of my right leg. THAT was made when a guy cut me with a corn knife (a kind of short, heavy, machete). The scar on my left temple was caused by a fall when ice skating and the temple bar of my glasses was driven into the side of my head. The little scar in my right eyebrow was caused when my mother dropped me on my head.

There. Does that answer your question, at least partially?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ed T
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 10:13 AM

"Silence is not always golden; sometimes it is yellow"unknown source


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 05 Dec 09 - 09:34 AM

The yellow pages are in the phone book, Stilly. At least they're yellow in mine. But I'm not absolutely certain they're supposed to be yellow. The phone book was delivered while we were out of town at an art fair. It was leaning against the mailbox post. A dog may have peed on it.


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