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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 08 Oct 08 - 07:37 PM
Rapparee 08 Oct 08 - 06:53 PM
Little Hawk 08 Oct 08 - 06:18 PM
Rapparee 08 Oct 08 - 06:15 PM
Amos 08 Oct 08 - 05:45 PM
Rapparee 08 Oct 08 - 04:56 PM
MMario 08 Oct 08 - 03:33 PM
Little Hawk 08 Oct 08 - 03:00 PM
Acme 08 Oct 08 - 02:52 PM
Little Hawk 08 Oct 08 - 02:46 PM
Amos 08 Oct 08 - 02:38 PM
Little Hawk 08 Oct 08 - 02:20 PM
MMario 08 Oct 08 - 02:05 PM
Janie 08 Oct 08 - 01:59 PM
Rapparee 08 Oct 08 - 01:48 PM
Amos 08 Oct 08 - 01:31 PM
Rapparee 08 Oct 08 - 12:53 PM
Acme 08 Oct 08 - 12:17 PM
Rapparee 08 Oct 08 - 11:49 AM
Amos 08 Oct 08 - 10:10 AM
Rapparee 08 Oct 08 - 10:04 AM
Rapparee 08 Oct 08 - 10:03 AM
MMario 08 Oct 08 - 09:39 AM
Donuel 08 Oct 08 - 09:36 AM
Rapparee 08 Oct 08 - 09:30 AM
Acme 08 Oct 08 - 01:03 AM
Little Hawk 08 Oct 08 - 12:22 AM
Janie 07 Oct 08 - 11:02 PM
Amos 07 Oct 08 - 10:29 PM
Rapparee 07 Oct 08 - 10:08 PM
Amos 07 Oct 08 - 08:14 PM
Little Hawk 07 Oct 08 - 06:12 PM
Little Hawk 07 Oct 08 - 06:05 PM
Amos 07 Oct 08 - 06:03 PM
Acme 07 Oct 08 - 05:56 PM
Little Hawk 07 Oct 08 - 05:28 PM
Amos 07 Oct 08 - 05:23 PM
Rapparee 07 Oct 08 - 04:14 PM
Amos 07 Oct 08 - 04:04 PM
Acme 07 Oct 08 - 04:01 PM
Rapparee 07 Oct 08 - 03:24 PM
MMario 07 Oct 08 - 02:19 PM
Amos 07 Oct 08 - 02:08 PM
MMario 07 Oct 08 - 01:58 PM
Rapparee 07 Oct 08 - 01:07 PM
Amos 07 Oct 08 - 12:09 PM
Rapparee 07 Oct 08 - 09:08 AM
Rapparee 07 Oct 08 - 08:54 AM
Amos 06 Oct 08 - 11:59 PM
Acme 06 Oct 08 - 10:34 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 07:37 PM

Speaking of disrespect for the Irish, perhaps you meant to write, "Amos, Seamus"???


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 06:53 PM

Amos, shamus -- I'm going to the Legion meeting tonight. Gonna settle this once and for all. By God, somebody's gonna be sorry or something!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 06:18 PM

"you will p[perhaps concede that standard English rules of [pronunciation have to be set aside to accommodate your narcissistic whimsy, a step I am unwilling to take just to humor you."

Gad! It has to be Amos. Who the hell else would talk like that? Well, maybe Ron Davies would, but I digress. Note the innate lack of respect for another man's choice of how to pronounce his own name. Shocking! Just who is calling who narcissistic around here? I feel sure now that it is Amos who we are dealing with. His lofty tone denotes that it is, and that things are finally getting back to abnormal around here, and that's probably good.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 06:15 PM

So...you have no respect for the Irish language then? You're dissin' Irish?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 05:45 PM

That is true for you, Rapaire, and you will agree we have run around this bush before. No matter what you believe the word to mean, it does not sound like Rapparee in the spelling you offer for it. While you are within your rights to SAY it should sound one or another way, you will p[perhaps concede that standard English rules of [pronunciation have to be set aside to accommodate your narcissistic whimsy, a step I am unwilling to take just to humor you.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 04:56 PM

"Rapaire" does not rhyme or even near-rhyme with "airs".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 03:33 PM

now I am beginning to have true doubt; Amos would have stuck some sort of attribution on that post.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 03:00 PM

I just read it. Yeah, it's a good one.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 02:52 PM

Go check out my "news of note" thread. I just posted a really interesting obituary.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 02:46 PM

No Republican could possibly have come up with that.

That, my friends, is blathertwaddle of the first water. It is the ne plus ultra of poetic bilgeroar and the apotheosis of persiflaginous cowflop.

In short...Amos has returned! There can be no doubt of it. I say it, so it must be so. Even Chongo says it, so it must doubly be so.

All bow your heads for a minute of grateful silence.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 02:38 PM

The outlook wasn't brilliant for the MOAB team that day:
The thread was sagging toward the end, and Amos was away,
And when Rapaire was taken over, and Little Hawk went dead,
A pall-like silence fell upon the lovers of the thread.

A straggling few jumped off the line, to music, while the rest
Clung to that hope which springs eternal in the human breast;
They thought, "If only Amos would return from th distant Eastern coast...
We'd put up even money now, if Amos would just post."

But Amos wasn't back yet, just Donuel and Rapaire,
And the former was hoodoo, while the latter put on airs;
So upon that stricken multitude sat glumness, fear and dread,
For there seemed but little chance of Amos posting to the thread.

But Donuel made a funny post, to the wonderment of many,
And Rapaire, the often pompous, wrote a thing both bright and zany;
And when the dust had lifted, and men saw what had transpired,
Old Mom was hanging half-way up, while the Getaway crew retired.

Then from five thousand throats and more there rose a lusty yell;
It rumbled through the valley, it rattled in the dell;
It pounded on the mountain and recoiled upon the flat,
For Amos, mighty Amos, was returning to the 'Cat.

There was ease in Amos' manner as he sat before his keys;
There was pride in Amos'bearing as he typed up quite a breeze.
And when, responding to the cheers, he nodded his wise head,
No stranger in the crowd could doubt 'twas Amos at the thread.

Ten thousand eyes were reading as he pressed his first "Submit";
Five thousand tongues applauded as he showed his winsome wit;
Then while the others shouted out, to see our Mom raised high,
Some caterwauling Mugwump snide said the post was just a lie!

"The man's a frasud!", the Mugwump said. "This isn't Amos' style!
The typos are too many!" But Amos only smiled.
He shook his wrists and typed again, the screen was blazing bright.
The crowd stood up and shook the house! But the bum said, "That ain't right!"

From the benches, black with people, there went up a muffled roar,
Like the beating of the storm-waves on stern and distant shore;
"Kill him! Kill the Mugwump!" shouted some one on the stand;
And it's likely they'd have killed him had not Amos raised his hand.

With a smile of Christian charity his friendly visage shone;
He stilled the rising tumult; he bade the thread go on;
He stretched his typing fingers,, and once more the post rang true;
But the Mugwump, blinded by his sins, again said, "That ain't you!"

"Fraud!" cried the maddened Mugwump, and and the crowd yelled "You're the Fraud!"
But one scornful look from Amos and the audience was awed.
They saw his face grow stern and cold, they his brain cells strain,
And they knew that Amos wouldn't let old Mom fall down again.

The post has flown, it's language round, and full, and rich and true;
The post appears, and every voice as one calls "It IS you".
And now the Mugwump falters, and he falls to a verbal hammer
As Amos--mighty Amos--deftly straightens out his grammar.

With effortless skill he rectifies the Mugwump's definitions,
And using polysyllables, displays his erudition,
'Til none can doubt the cure has come, for all their fear and dread:
'Tis Amos, mighty Amos, once again is on the thread.


Now in this favored MOAB land the sun is shining bright;
Now the guitars are ringing out, and MOAB hearts are light,
And MOAB men are laughing, and MOAB children shout;
Except crestfallen Mugwump, missed by none, who done struck out.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 02:20 PM

Exactly. I AM accepting no imitations. I want the REAL Amos back.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 02:05 PM

Well as the members of the Legion say "He may be a wierd doppelganger - but he's OUR wierd doppalganger." Accept no imitations.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 01:59 PM

I always thought Rapaire was a weirdo doppelganger????


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 01:48 PM

See? The REAL Amos would have immediately replied, "Of course! Cut off both legs and both arms if need be! I have nothing to hide!"

Where are you rascals hiding the REAL Amos? 'Fess up, or I'll put the Idaho Legion on the track!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 01:31 PM

I can see the MOAB has been infiltrated by imposters. Any of my old friends would have recognized my inimitable style by now, so I can only assume these loudmouth dilettantes are advertising their own sins by their overloud protestations. Sigh. Where did I leave that Bat Signal projector? I suppose I better text the Mayor of Pocatello, and let him know his library has been taken over by some weirdo walk-in doppelganger.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 12:53 PM

We don't need a big chunk from her -- the contents of her spit valve should do nicely. We will need several pounds from the person who claims to be "Amos" though. Of course, the REAL Amos will be happy to cooperate. Only a fake "Amos" would complain about our need for a leg or an arm or something.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 12:17 PM

"a chunk out of Barky" - not likely, she'll club you with her trumpet case (it is the trumpet, isn't it?). No point in denting the instrument, so the case will be empty, but I'm sure it will hurt.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 11:49 AM

Amos, I think that we need before and after DNA samples. The first is easy to get (a chunk out of Barky should do it), but we hope you'll understand when we send around six big guys with a chainsaw.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 10:10 AM

Little Hawk. ...

I don't know about your education, pal. Maybe its a project we should have left unstarted.

The "it" refers, as any intelligent reader would recognize, to the dictionary which I advised you not to pick up until you stopped waving your arms around.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 10:04 AM

Oh yeah. My other brother's birthday is November 1 -- All Saints' Day.

Don't count on him being among their number.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 10:03 AM

It varies from year to year. The year he had nine bypasses he thought he might not have any more. The year he was in Vietnam he was rocketed and thought he might not have another one anytime soon. Then he had a slight stroke a few years back and.... Well, you get the idea. It all started when he was about five years old and had rheumatic fever.

By the way, yesterday was the birthday of his first grandson. The kid's about five now, but hasn't had rheumatic OR romantic fever...yet.

October is a very busy month for me: my anniversary is on the sixth, Xavier's birthday is the 7th, my bro's birthday is the eighth, and my wife's is the eleventh.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 09:39 AM

So tell us Rapaire - what kind of birthdays does your brother have other then annual ones?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 09:36 AM

If Amos is an imposter,
I'm an imposer
Rapaire's brother is a poser
Stilly is a posey
and GUEST is a phoney


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 09:30 AM

I am about to make an earth-shaking announcement. Please hold onto your socks and anything else that might fly around and hurt someone. Ready? Here goes:



















TODAY IS MY BROTHER'S ANNUAL BIRTHDAY. HE IS 62 YEARS OLD TODAY.










God knows, we never thought he'd make it this far.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 01:03 AM

vile charlatan died earlier in the year, don't you remember? Last name of Heston. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 Oct 08 - 12:22 AM

"please stop waving your arms around, as it could fly off and hurt someone."

Ha! More proof that you are an imposter. Amos would know perfectly well that the word "it" in the above sentence is completely incorrect. Amos would have said "please stop waving your arms around, as they could fly off and hurt someone" or "please stop waving your arms around, as one of them could fly off and hurt someone".

You are not Amos. You are a poorly educated Republican saboteur and kidnapper of our beloved Amos, master of the written and spoken world and world champion of blathertwaddle.

Go back to your master Karl Rove, you vile charlatan!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 11:02 PM

AMOS!!!!!!

YOU PROMISED NOT TO TELL.....

Hey Mom, Sister Annie built me a shed, took it apart, and is going to haul it down here this weekend for the two of us to put back together.

I'm about to learn how to shingle a roof.





Or die trying.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 10:29 PM

Not in some dive with other decadent reprobates, swilling evil liquor and carousing with those of ill repute while passing it all off as a festival of song and good fellowship.


Actually it was quite the other way 'round -- it WAS a festival of song and good fellowship, which its participants enjoying trying to portray as carousing by decadent reprobates.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 10:08 PM

No, I didn't go to Getaway. I spent the weekend as Mother's children should, sober and well-mannered. Not in some dive with other decadent reprobates, swilling evil liquor and carousing with those of ill repute while passing it all off as a festival of song and good fellowship.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 08:14 PM

I don't think there is such a word as indentity, Little Hawk. But before you pick up your dictionary, please stop waving your arms around, as it could fly off and hurt someone.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 06:12 PM

Silence, faker! It pains me to hear you assuming the indentity of a man whose value I cannot even place a figure on, a man whose shoes you are not fit to wear, a man whose eloquence outshines your own by a margin comparable to the gap between Richard Nixon's public utterances and his credibility. How DARE you pretend to be Amos?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 06:05 PM

Not a fakir, no. ;-) No fakir worth his salt would spend ANY time on as trivial a matter as this...

But a faker? Or a Republican? Hell, they'll spend any amount of time on trivialities.

That's why I think it could be both, and I think the real Amos has left the building.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 06:03 PM

Indeed, little hack, you are so carried away by the sound of your own voice that you have departed your analytical senses. One look at my posting history will show you that double letters, missed spaces and other bizarre Errors of the Thumb are quite routine. Clearly, you are over-anxious to make your case.

But rest assured, I do not hold this against you. After all, you did not get to the Getaway. Had you done, you would have had a very different frame of mind, I assure you.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 05:56 PM

Au contraire, LH.

Would Amos forget to leave a space between the words "a" and "substitute"??? Heaven forfend!

It is a classic Amos typo--so it could be faked, but the overuse of typos is not something that would occur to a fakir, I'm sure of it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 05:28 PM

Well, I have to admit to serious doubts as to whether that is the real Amos, Rapaire.

A superficial glance at this following excerpt would seem to suggest that it could be the real Amos...

"I am sorry I did not study your fatuuous and doltish contributions made during my absence, and thus have ignored the arbitrary and excessively dogmatic constraints you invented as asubstitute for what ordinary people call simple cognitive ability."

The word "doltish", for instance, just screams "AMOS!", doesn't it? The whole sentence concluding in the phrase "simple cognitive ability" simply reeks of Amos's form of pretentiously elitist and condescending quasi-intellectual bafflegab and bullroar.

However...and it's a big however....would Amos mispell the world "fatuous" by putting an extra "u" in it???? Surely not! Would Amos forget to leave a space between the words "a" and "substitute"??? Heaven forfend!

No, I think that it is not Amos we are dealing with here at all, but some scurrilous imposter. The real Amos has been spirited away to some hideous fate and has been replaced by a paid Republican saboteur. You watch. In a few days he'll be making fatuous and ill-advised statements about the presidential campaign, all of them cunningly designed to destroy people's confidence in Barack Obama.

Oh, the humanity! When will the REAL Amos return to our collective bosom??????????


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 05:23 PM

Prove I am not, you fakir!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 04:14 PM

PROVE you're Amos, you faker!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 04:04 PM

No, it was just that Wincing Devil and I did not happen to cross trails in many places. The Getaway is blessed with four large gathering rooms and half-a-dozen smaller ones that act as the common areas for each of the cabins sprinkled through the adjacent woods. Consequently you can spend the whole weekend not running into someone unless you run into each other at breakfast.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 04:01 PM

Amos, that was the only recognizable photo of you I could find. If you were 'in disguise' with a lamp shade on your head then I missed it in that set of photos.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 03:24 PM

It is imperative that we obtain the unmitigated opinion of Little Hawk in this matter.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 02:19 PM

It was hard over the weekend to think about Getaway - though there was some compensation; spent saturday at a ren-faire; sang a lot with friends ; both at the faire and afterwards at a local session. Met a rennie who grew up in the Portsmouth area - he says he was a local at the Press Room - so we chatted about that. He did some great shanties at the session.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 02:08 PM

I didn't say I was recovered. It's like decompressing from dream-time.    "What a strange, strange dream it's been! And you were there, too, Aunt Em, and you, and you...".

I am sorry I did not study your fatuuous and doltish contributions made during my absence, and thus have ignored the arbitrary and excessively dogmatic constraints you invented as asubstitute for what ordinary people call simple cognitive ability.

Stilly, thanks for digging up that one unflattering picture. I believe there will be more forthcoming as various other phtogoraphers step forward with their labors.

I am trembling with apprehension concerning Genie's QUickTIme captures of segments from Saturday night. I got two hours' sleep Friday, because I wanted to be up for breakfast. I also got up for breakfast on Sunday, on three hours' sleep, and on Monday, with perhaps four. So I have been in Recovery.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 01:58 PM

tHAT'S NOT Amos - he couldn't possibly be recovered from Getaway yet.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 01:07 PM

Too many letters per word and only ONE from the approved word list!

Prove you're Amos, you imposter!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 12:09 PM

Being got by biker chicks ain't half bad, I have discovered....


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 09:08 AM

Note the time, too. The biker chicks were waiting until midnight to strike!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Oct 08 - 08:54 AM

Most of those words are longer than three letters AND are not on the approved word list!

The biker chicks got Amos! You can see them hovering around like vultures in that photo, just waiting to pluck him out of that chair.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Oct 08 - 11:59 PM

Hiya Mom!

I just dragged in from the airport and emptied my stuff and put everything away. I am worn out to the bone and alse happy down to the depths.

See Getaway threads for setails, must crash.

Love,


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Oct 08 - 10:34 PM

"A Theater Roar Rip Wiz"

That's our boy!


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