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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

GUEST,MMario 26 Aug 03 - 09:28 AM
Amos 26 Aug 03 - 09:26 AM
Sandra in Sydney 26 Aug 03 - 08:57 AM
Amos 26 Aug 03 - 08:57 AM
GUEST,Moloch 26 Aug 03 - 08:55 AM
GUEST,MMario 26 Aug 03 - 08:48 AM
Amos 26 Aug 03 - 08:44 AM
Rapparee 26 Aug 03 - 08:37 AM
Rapparee 26 Aug 03 - 08:37 AM
GUEST,Tenderheart Bear 26 Aug 03 - 12:46 AM
Little Hawk 25 Aug 03 - 11:18 PM
Rapparee 25 Aug 03 - 09:13 PM
GUEST,MMario 25 Aug 03 - 03:03 PM
Rapparee 25 Aug 03 - 02:36 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 25 Aug 03 - 01:57 PM
GUEST 25 Aug 03 - 12:26 PM
Amos 25 Aug 03 - 12:21 PM
Little Hawk 25 Aug 03 - 11:34 AM
Rapparee 25 Aug 03 - 09:12 AM
Rapparee 25 Aug 03 - 08:50 AM
Little Hawk 24 Aug 03 - 11:23 PM
Rapparee 24 Aug 03 - 10:28 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 24 Aug 03 - 09:26 PM
Rapparee 24 Aug 03 - 09:20 PM
Little Hawk 24 Aug 03 - 08:59 PM
Rapparee 24 Aug 03 - 07:48 PM
Little Hawk 24 Aug 03 - 06:23 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 24 Aug 03 - 06:13 PM
Little Hawk 24 Aug 03 - 05:14 PM
Rapparee 24 Aug 03 - 04:44 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 24 Aug 03 - 01:46 PM
GUEST,The Deity 24 Aug 03 - 01:03 PM
Amos 24 Aug 03 - 12:25 PM
GUEST,GALACTIC OVERLORD 24 Aug 03 - 09:51 AM
Rapparee 23 Aug 03 - 11:31 AM
GUEST,Mrs. Bee 23 Aug 03 - 11:03 AM
Amos 22 Aug 03 - 10:46 PM
Rapparee 22 Aug 03 - 09:52 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 22 Aug 03 - 09:12 PM
Rapparee 22 Aug 03 - 03:33 PM
GUEST,MMario 22 Aug 03 - 03:06 PM
GUEST,"Debbie Earl" 22 Aug 03 - 02:52 PM
GUEST,MMario 22 Aug 03 - 11:24 AM
Amos 22 Aug 03 - 11:07 AM
GUEST 22 Aug 03 - 10:45 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 22 Aug 03 - 10:02 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 22 Aug 03 - 09:57 AM
GUEST,mmARIO 22 Aug 03 - 09:34 AM
GUEST,freds 22 Aug 03 - 09:24 AM
Amos 22 Aug 03 - 09:23 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 26 Aug 03 - 09:28 AM

good thing I got new hip boots!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Aug 03 - 09:26 AM

Pure BS has no redeeming intellectual, technical or factual content.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 26 Aug 03 - 08:57 AM

what's pure b*llsh*te? from a pedigree b*ll?

sandra


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Aug 03 - 08:57 AM

MM this is the BS version. The other thread is the Literary Version.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Moloch
Date: 26 Aug 03 - 08:55 AM

You guys better
watch it, ‘cause
you’re starting to
piss me off again.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 26 Aug 03 - 08:48 AM

[whinge mode ON]why is all the martian invasion stuff happening on this thread. There's a perfectly good thread for it down below here and this thread it suppossed to be pure b*llsh*te. the Martian Invasion is serious stuff! [whinge mode OFF]


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Aug 03 - 08:44 AM

Oh, my, I love it when people vent their frustrations. It's so very special to see, don't you think....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Aug 03 - 08:37 AM

Hey! Just ten to go (nine after this).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Aug 03 - 08:37 AM

Hey, "Tenderheart" Bear!

Got a message for you.


"Numb Nuts, you land in Idaho and we'll show you what it feels like to get the Sawtooths* shoved up your a**e. You and your group of pansy-wansy honeypot suckers show up ANYWHERE within 5,000 kilometers of Boise and we will kick your butts so far up your backsides you'll have to burp to fart. And remember, in the words of your pal Barney, "I love you!" (By the way, he was delicious. We served him with baked Idaho potatoes.)

And you want to share? We got stuff to share with you. Mostly .30 caliber stuff, but some's a lot bigger!

                                 Love,
                                 Your friends in The Idaho Regiment"

(I cleaned this up so that it wouldn't offend your tenderheart sensibilities.)


*The Sawtooths are a mountain range.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Tenderheart Bear
Date: 26 Aug 03 - 12:46 AM

Earthlings! My name is Tenderheart Bear (yeh, click on the name to see what a badass I am). I am the leader of the band of freedom fighters you Earthlings know as "Care Bears". Yep, that's us. The ones you're making such a puny attempt to defend yourselves against. Well, you're gonna lose! Why? Because you don't know how to share! That's why the Galactic Overlord (Yeh, I know, some shitbird pretending to be God said that he'd fired the G.O. Wrong!) sent us on this little incursion. To teach you fuckers how to share!

So listen up! Learn how to share and we'll just go home. Keep on being the selfish assholes you've been being and we'll kick your ass. Understand?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Aug 03 - 11:18 PM

Is that Ms Penelope Rutledge I see presiding over the "trouncing of the foe"?!!! How stirring! You have done well, Rapaire, and shall be rewarded with a medal or two and a commendation. Those cutesy-pie thingees you found and fought are the most disgusting sight I have seen in a long time, and I dearly hope you exterminated every last one of them! Don't fret over the casualties. Bloodshed and heavy loss of life are part of every glorious victory, and guarantee that it will be long remembered and serve to inspire future generations to go forth and hurl themselves mindlessly into the fray just as their forefathers did. Expect more of this. It's good for morale and makes for great movies and books at a later date.

Too bad about Debbie Earl...but he/she/it kept talking about the "nice little farm" he/she/it was going to own after the war, and you know what happens to idiots who do that! It's the same as guys who are on guard duty at night and say, "It's too quiet out there. I don't like it." More fatal words were never spoken. Any guy says that, he's dead meat. I can guaran-dam-tee-it, pilgrim.

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Aug 03 - 09:13 PM

Colonel Hawk --

I beg to inform you that at 1712 MDT the Idaho Regiment was attacked by allies of the Martian invaders. Fighting was fierce indeed, but we followed your orders and strategized all over the place. We were finally able to obtain sufficient supplies
to enable our beleaguered forces to absolutely trounce the foe.

SIR! we whipped 'em good, SIR!

But SIR! I regret to inform you that we suffered horribly for our victory. There are many wounded, and many have left this vale of suffering forever. There are also many missing in action, SIR!, one of whom is our newest recruit, Debbie Earl.

SIR! we shall do our utmost to resupply and regroup prior to the expected attack on the 27th, but we will then be at half strength (20% alcohol) at best.

I remain, reverently and obediently your humble servant, SIR!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 25 Aug 03 - 03:03 PM

Hey there; I say HEY THERE! Y'all leave that Foghorn Leghorn Rooster Alone!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Aug 03 - 02:36 PM

Colonel Hawk, SIR!!

I beg to report, SIR!, that we have taken in a new recruit, SIR! Particulars are: Six feet four inches tall, 196 pounds and few shillings over, quite educated and articulate, and the female members of the Regiment seem to find him to be "a hunk." (Sir, I am familiar with military terms and can readily discuss MLRs, beaten zones, pre-planned fires, TOT, close air support, final defensive fires, commissariat, and FUBAR, but I unfamiliar with this last term and report it here because, SIR!, I am certain it will convey meaning to you.) The new recruit's name, SIR!, is Debbie Earl, SIR!, which causing some small confusion among the troops.

Otherwise, SIR! things are going well. The new weapons have arrived and have been issued, as per your orders, SIR! Training, SIR! has been goind quite well indeed, with only three fatalities and seven wounded, SIR! The troops have also received the new rations, SIR! and some are becoming attached to the rations, calling them "cute."

SIR! That is all for now, SIR!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 25 Aug 03 - 01:57 PM

Colonel Hawk,

Intelligence sources have reported the deployment of yet another cadre of anti-Martian troops over on this thread. Yes, the Mudcat Commandos under the leadership of Sargent Kat have been brought into the fray. Between Colonel Hawk and Sargent Kat, Tweetybird and Foghorn Leghorn don't stand a chance! However, whether or not you've got enough between you to put a whoop-ass on those Care Bears is still kind of iffy, especially since rumors abound of a new secret alliance between the Care Bears and this guy. (And we all know that Sargent Kat doesn't have a very good track record against giant mice.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 25 Aug 03 - 12:26 PM

there is a theory that s*it is NOT the waste product of the digestive system - rather that it is a symbiotic life form . the reason most organisms regularly produce deposits of sh*t is that in reproducing the symbiote has neccessitated more living space then available and part is expelled. Under rare conditions this species can exist outside of a host body - reproduceing by spontaneous generation


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Aug 03 - 12:21 PM

Gets deeper and deeper, don't it? Hmmm.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Aug 03 - 11:34 AM

You're on the right track, Rapaire, my lad! Now bear down, grit yer teeth, and do what must be done. If ya want some inspiration, watch a few old John Wayne movies, like "Sands of Iwo Jima". And remember this: there is NOTHING wrong with using WMD's and slaughtering millions of foreigners/savages as long as they are the Bad Guys and you are the Good Guys...and we are! Make no mistake about that, pilgrim.

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Aug 03 - 09:12 AM

Colonel!

A question, sir! A bunch of the troops, the ones who call themselves "The Cleary's Grove Boys," want to use WMDs. Sir, isn't it against the Geneva Convention, the Hague Conventions on Land Warfare, and human decency to create and use a musical group composed of castenets, ukuleles, accordions, bodhrans, bagpipes, a lute, and a grand piano?

The explosion warn't nothin'. Just some of the lads and lassies foolin' around. High spirits, you know. Pre-action hijinks. Don't worry about it. No big thing. And I'm certain we'll find most of the body parts eventually. Just a bit more paperwork, that's all. I have stopped the issue of hand grenades and have begun issuing water balloons.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Aug 03 - 08:50 AM

Morning Report, 25 August 2003, 0645 or so MDT.

Okay, Colonel. Almost half of the troops are assembled, and nearly everyone remembered to bring their firelocks. Some even remembered to bring powder and shot, but I had it taken away until they sober up. They didn't go home after being dismissed last night, but instead spent the night playing "Go Fish" and drinking Scotch-and-root-beer with various various Fallen Women In Low Dives (I considered assembling a firing squad for the insult to whisky, but using their own powder and ball to execute them seemed a bit declasse, so I decided to let their hangovers be their punishment).

Corporal Simpkins forgot his pants again. Two people, Miguel Machismo and Trixie "Boom-Boom" Jones, are on sick call for some sort of "burning when they go pee-pee," and I hope that this does not presage an epedemic.

A couple more folks wandered in a few minutes ago, but one of them went back home to get her purse.

Your orders have been received and at the moment we are issuing hand grenades to the troops.

Oops, I'd better go see what that big boom was. Later, dude.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Aug 03 - 11:23 PM

That's the spirit, Rapaire! Assemble your troops (those that can stand up...) at 0600 sharp tomorrow! We attack at dawn! All Care Bears shall be destroyed. Give 'em no quarter. Don't even give 'em a nickel or a dime. And if you run across any Teletubbies shoot 'em on sight!

Last minute espionage directive: Great Root Bear inflatable bears and Ronald McDonald inflatable clowns suspended over fast food restaurants are actually enemy reconnaisance vehicles. Machine gun 'em on sight! Oh, and Tweety Bird is a spy, plus he's terminally cute, so when you hear that whiny little voice saying, "Oooooo...I t'ought I taw a..." BLAST HIM INTO ETERNITY!!! Cats everywhere will thank you for this.

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Aug 03 - 10:28 PM

ah, Colonel, it's getting late and some of the troops have to be home before 2100, and they've got a bit of a walk, some of them, so I let them go home. We'll be ready and rarin' to go tomorrow, and 'most everyone will finally be sober. I also tried to make them stop gathering flowers, but they told me it was for camouflage so I said that it was okay. I think some of us will be marching off disguised as floral arrangements.

Anyway, Colonel, everyone's gone home and I'm going to turn in myself. Let me know if the Martians arrive tonight, okay?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 24 Aug 03 - 09:26 PM

My children were of the appropriate age when Care Bears were in their maximum vogue around '84 or so. I actually took them to see "The Care Bears Movie". Fortunately, I managed to fall asleep after about the first five minutes. Unfortunately, the kids did not. It took years of counseling to get them to the point where they could distinguish fantasy from reality and they still both managed to grow up to be hoodlums.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Aug 03 - 09:20 PM

I've investigated further, and can only say, "Jumpin' sh*t! Let's BLAST them l'il buggers afore they drag us all down to their level! Jaysus, the very survival of the human race (poor excuse that it might be) is at stake!"

We're off to off the Care Bears,
The invading Martian sods,
We'll stomp their heads and pee in their beds
And save our world because!
Oh, we're off to off the Care Bears
Those dirty Martian sods!

Little Hawk, the Idaho Regiment stands ready! Our marching song (above) is written! Our firelocks are on our shoulders! We have drawn our swords, and our trumpets shall never call retreat! The piper is tuned and he's pipin' away! Our packs are on our backs and the boat's on the bay! Our flax and wheels are sold! The girls (and boys) we left behind are weepin' for their Johnny and Joanie goin' to sea! We won't come back 'til it's over! The Harrow tomorrow we must cross! We few, we proud, we band of brothers (and sisters)! Where ever our colors are worn are changed, changed utterly! Wrap the green flag round me! Once more, dear friends, into the breach, once more! Remember the Alamo! Remember the Maine! St. Denis! They shall not pass! Mountjoy! For God, England, and St. George! Arount thee wench, the rump-fed runion cries!

What, Colonel Little Hawk, are your orders?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Aug 03 - 08:59 PM

Whaddya mean, "the unknown"? I say wipe 'em out and do it now. You can't make me feel guilty about it either. I saw a good comic about them one time. On the left side was a panel showing the Care Bears, who were smiling sweetly at the reader and saying "I wuv you!" and "I care about your feewings!". On the right side was a panel showing the Uncaring Bears, who were glowering at the reader, smoking cigars, and saying "I can't stand you!" and "Who gives a rip!#?"

Har! Har! Loved it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Aug 03 - 07:48 PM

Good Lord, LH! I never thought that you'd espouse genocide! Have we stooped this low? Is there no way that we can sit down with these and discuss matters? Must we immediately grab a gun? Is there no solution except violence and war? Does the word "humanity" mean nothing? They are creatures like us, possessed of a body and soul, a mind. They might be fuzzy outside, they might look differently, they might even be tasty and delicious when served with a roasted pepper sauce and a nice Merlot, but must we always approach the unknown with fear and violence?

For shame, LH! For shame!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Aug 03 - 06:23 PM

I couldn't agree more Bee-Dubya! Care Bears are the very apotheosis of evil! They must be expunged utterly from this World by every means possible!!! Then there are the Teletubbies! Imagine a feature film called "The Care Bears Meet the Teletubbies". Now imagine it again at a matinee. Now jump off a bridge...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 24 Aug 03 - 06:13 PM

Bert evil? Ernie evil? No problem. I can accept the possibility of any Muppet being evil, especially Miss Piggy, Fozzie Bear and the Swedish Chef. Everyone's always known that Muppets have the potential for evil because Jim Henson and Frank Oz were, after all, a couple of freaks who found a profitable niche for their weirdness. Where eccentricity lies, the seed for evil cannot be far away. Just ask Dr. Faustus.

But Care Bears are a different matter all together. They exude a special malevolence. They personify BLAND and BLAND is the worst kind of evil. There is no eccentricity where Care Bears are concerned. There is only DULL. Care Bears rot away the minds of young children in the same inevitable creeping fashion that Bazooka Joe and Coca-Cola rot their teeth.    Care Bears are the Valium of evil! There has never been any question of a Care Bear selling his soul to the Devil because Care Bears have no souls to begin with! They are the kiddie culture equivalent of The Walking Dead!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Aug 03 - 05:14 PM

Bert may indeed be evil, but if so he's been driven to it by Ernie! Ernie is a sadistic, manipulative little creep who delights in emotionally torturing Bert and driving him to the brink of madness. This evil of Ernie's should be exposed in its full ugliness for all the World to see! And when the Martian invasion succeeds, it will be. I can guaran-dam-tee-it! Ernie will be osterized with extreme prejudice. His remains will be used to plug holes in leaky sewage pipes.

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Aug 03 - 04:44 PM

Ah, Bee-dubya-ell, there can be evil anywhere.
Even the most innocuous, most innocent, facade may be but a mask disguising evil.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 24 Aug 03 - 01:46 PM

Oh my God!!!! Care Bears!!!! It's far worse than I thought! Give me evil mutant cannibalistic slime creatures with 5000 volt anal probes over f***ing Care Bears any day! We'll all die from insipidness!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,The Deity
Date: 24 Aug 03 - 01:03 PM

Yes, it's Me. The Deity. God Almighty. Yahweh. Allah. Whatever you want to call Me.

Anyway, don't pay any attention to whoever is claiming to be the Galactic Overlord. I created that position hoping that someone or something could take some of the responsibility for this galaxy off of My shoulders. Didn't happen, so I abolished the position and laid off the incumbent.

Good Me, some of those I allowed to be GOs became power hungry! The one I just laid off (and there won't be another) was, well, here's a picture.
And here's another
, you can see the resemblence to another, earlier GO developing.

As for the impending attack, here
is a picture of your "enemy."

Well, I hope to Me that this clears things up!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Aug 03 - 12:25 PM

You sure that wasn't Guest Muffy posting that?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,GALACTIC OVERLORD
Date: 24 Aug 03 - 09:51 AM

HEY! EARTHPEOPLE! WAKE UP! THE MARTIANS ARE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR! THEY'RE GOING TO BE THERE ON AUGUST, 27! THAT'S ONLY THREE DAYS FROM NOW! IF YOU PEOPLE DON'T GET 1000 POSTS TO THIS THREAD BY THEN, YOUR WORLD IS DOOMED! THAT'S RIGHT! I SAID "DOOMED"! DO YOU WANT TO BEAR RESPONSIBILITY FOR THE DESTRUCTION OF TERRAN CIVILIZATION? AND ALL BECAUSE YOU WERE TOO (A) BUSY (B) LAZY (C) UNCREATIVE TO POST A FEW WORDS TO THIS, THE MOTHER OF ALL BS THREADS!

AND I HAD SUCH HIGH HOPES FOR YOU GUYS. TSK, TSK, TSK. YOU KNOW, OF ALL THE RACES OVER WHICH I EXERCISE MY OVERLORDSHIP, YOU FOLKS ARE ONE OF MY FAVORITES. IN THE OVERLORDLY SCHEME OF THINGS YOU GUYS ARE SORT OF LIKE DACHSUNDS. NOT MUCH GOOD FOR ANYTHING, BUT CUTE AND YAPPY. I JUST LOVE TO WATCH YOU CHASE YOUR TAILS. AND, IF THE TRUTH BE KNOWN, I REALLY DON'T LIKE MARTIANS AT ALL. I'D HATE TO SEE YOUR CUTE LITTLE PLANET TAKEN OVER BY THOSE RUFFIANS.

SO, WAKE UP! POST OR DIE!

YOURS TRULY,

G.O.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Aug 03 - 11:31 AM

Mrs. Bee, you are a wonderful and forgiving woman. I must ask you, though, if Bee-dubya's playing of the dobro and/or banjos is a condition of his forgiveness -- a penance. If so, couldn't you have done something less terrible, such as ten Hail Marys, ten Our Fathers, and a good flagellation? Sackcloth, fresh ashes, and kneeling in the snow holding a twenty-pound candle? The Inquisition?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Mrs. Bee
Date: 23 Aug 03 - 11:03 AM

Dear Mudcat People,

Please allow me to re-introduce myself. I am the wife of the individual who goes by the moniker of Bee-dubya-ell on your website. I posted to this thread once before, but it was a long time ago.

I just wanted to let you folks know that my husband has made a full confession of his lust for that alien trollop, Bubba Bubba, and I have accepted his apology. In all honesty, I don't think there was much to worry about anyway. Poor old Bee is at that age where the distinction between fantasy and reality has begun to blur a bit. He likes to fantasize about nubile young things, but the truth of the matter is he probably wouldn't remember what to do with one if ......well, you get the idea. He'd be much better off to stick with playing the Dobro. He can still do that fairly well.

On the other hand, Debbie Earl, (if you haven't been captured and returned to fungus-hood) I hear you like to hang out at truckstops and play the blues. If you're ever at the Flying-J truckstop on Interstate 10 just north of Loxley, Alabama, I think my phone number is still on the men's-room wall. We can run Bee-dubya off and you can have your way with all of his guitars. I should warn you, though, there are several banjoes in the house as well. If you are allergic to them please let me know in advance and I will make arrangements to have them removed (or incinerated).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Aug 03 - 10:46 PM

BRUCE, BRUCE, MAN ... STEADY ON!! Please remember you are on a ricochet!! Doesn't that mean anything to you?? This is NOT a good time to make decisions or to throw yourself at semi-alien hallucinations just because they're not there!! Take a deep breath.

Settle down, get real. find yourself and build a stable center to grow from, man. You've been through a lot. Maybe it is time to leave the aliens behind, now...and believe me, I say this only out of concern for your well-being.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Aug 03 - 09:52 PM

Bee-dubya-ell, please accept my heartfelt sympathy for your recent and tragic loss of Bubba Bubba. I am certain that she is now in a Better Place, and that you will pass through this Vale Of Tears and become a stronger and better person because of it. If there is anything that can be done to help...anything that doesn't involve money or unnatural acts...please remember that I'm here and then go ask someone else. But you do have my sympathy.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 22 Aug 03 - 09:12 PM

Dear Debbie Earl,

Thank you very much for your kind words of consolation. They have really helped me get over the loss of Bubba Bubba. I know that you yourself are on the lam from your fellow freds and that they probably want to turn you back into something like this. Have you considered altering your current "human male" manifestation as a way of throwing them off of your track? A nice female closely resembling Demi Moore at age twenty-five would be a real good choice. If you decide to do so, please let me know. You know where to reach me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Aug 03 - 03:33 PM

It could be, MMario....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 22 Aug 03 - 03:06 PM

Can that possibly be a true freds' posting above? A quick (though admittedly non-professional) word analysis points towards fraud.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,"Debbie Earl"
Date: 22 Aug 03 - 02:52 PM

This must be done quickly, as They are looking for me and, I am certain, are monitoring from where posts are made to this thread.

Do not mourn, Bee-Dubya-Ell, as Bubba Bubba (as you know her/it) is only returned to it/her actual form. What you perceive as a fungus is only what appears in the dimensions you can apprehend. She/it is in excellent health as you can see by it/her color; I am certain that it/she is only restrained by a slight turning in the e-dimension, which will cause nothing but locus stasis.

Do not mourn for yourself, either, as in order to do what she wished to do she would have had to consume your protein. All of it, and with great mess. I am sure that you will appreciate the fact that you would have had to have been alive as long as possible while this was taking place. I speak only for you, as I do not know what Khandu might have thought of it.

The Labrador Retriever has been taken in by a wonderful family. I am not privy to what has happened to the R. Nigricans, but I suspect that it was thrown out, its genetic similarity to that of Bubba Bubba unappreciated.

I must leave, as I have already spent too much time here and They might, at this moment, be coming for me. Should I escape, I will attempt to post again in the future.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 22 Aug 03 - 11:24 AM

I'd consider leaving the planet! And don't think joining the Martians will protect you! Not even the Manatees will be able to prevent the Wrath of Bee-dubya-ell!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Aug 03 - 11:07 AM

Freds be afraid....be very fredly afraid...BWL is NOT someone you want to mess with, and he really had his heart set on the Heather Locklear lookalike lick-a-lot and sack-hopping contest. It was gunna be a reglar field day and now you gone and disappointed him badly. I were you I'd be leaving' town 'bout now...


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 22 Aug 03 - 10:45 AM

I think I may be suffering from font envy


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 22 Aug 03 - 10:02 AM

See what you damned freds made me do? Made me so upset over the loss of my dear Bubba Bubba that I forgot to go back to regular font after the

AAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 22 Aug 03 - 09:57 AM

AAAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHH!!!!!

Oh cruel world! The one chance in my lifetime to make it with a genuine alien who happens to bear a striking resemblance to Heather Locklear and you freds go and turn her into a stinking fungus! My God! If it had to be a fungus you could at least have turned her into a bunch of morels (Morchella esculenta) so we could have gotten a nice stir fry out of the deal. But, no!

I'm starting to dislike you freds just a little.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,mmARIO
Date: 22 Aug 03 - 09:34 AM

tHAT WEBSITE (www.missinita.com)is one of the most frightening things I have *ever* seen. ever. period.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,freds
Date: 22 Aug 03 - 09:24 AM

wee kapshurd bubbbaababbaaab las niht an turnt hurit bak intoo wat shud luk lik heer iz piktur aftr ithur chanjd bak heer iz piktur beefoor
wen hurit wuz wurkin in nashfill ithur iz in kusstoddy ithur las wurds in enklij wur bedub o beedub candoo wat wil hapun tu doggee nou hurit suks slym lik ithur shud nou too katj teppyarl yur wellkum


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Aug 03 - 09:23 AM

Steal, hell...consider it a gift. Original, yes. That's one way to decribe it!

:>)

A


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