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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 27 Aug 07 - 10:57 AM
Rapparee 27 Aug 07 - 09:43 AM
Little Hawk 27 Aug 07 - 03:26 AM
Acme 27 Aug 07 - 12:56 AM
Janie 27 Aug 07 - 12:31 AM
Acme 27 Aug 07 - 12:24 AM
Little Hawk 26 Aug 07 - 10:39 PM
Amos 26 Aug 07 - 10:36 PM
Rapparee 26 Aug 07 - 09:59 PM
Amos 26 Aug 07 - 08:45 PM
Little Hawk 26 Aug 07 - 08:09 PM
Janie 26 Aug 07 - 08:05 PM
Little Hawk 26 Aug 07 - 07:53 PM
Amos 26 Aug 07 - 07:51 PM
Little Hawk 26 Aug 07 - 07:49 PM
Rapparee 26 Aug 07 - 07:41 PM
Little Hawk 26 Aug 07 - 07:38 PM
Rapparee 26 Aug 07 - 07:04 PM
Amos 26 Aug 07 - 06:57 PM
Rapparee 26 Aug 07 - 05:51 PM
Acme 26 Aug 07 - 12:01 PM
Amos 26 Aug 07 - 11:36 AM
Rapparee 26 Aug 07 - 11:11 AM
Janie 26 Aug 07 - 10:35 AM
Amos 26 Aug 07 - 10:19 AM
Amos 26 Aug 07 - 01:00 AM
Janie 26 Aug 07 - 12:37 AM
Acme 26 Aug 07 - 12:25 AM
Amos 26 Aug 07 - 12:24 AM
Little Hawk 25 Aug 07 - 11:39 PM
Rapparee 25 Aug 07 - 10:00 PM
Janie 25 Aug 07 - 09:59 PM
Amos 25 Aug 07 - 09:23 PM
Amos 25 Aug 07 - 09:20 PM
Amos 25 Aug 07 - 09:19 PM
Amos 25 Aug 07 - 09:14 PM
Janie 25 Aug 07 - 09:10 PM
Acme 25 Aug 07 - 07:25 PM
Amos 25 Aug 07 - 07:15 PM
Janie 25 Aug 07 - 06:13 PM
Rapparee 25 Aug 07 - 05:59 PM
Rapparee 25 Aug 07 - 05:58 PM
Janie 25 Aug 07 - 05:31 PM
Little Hawk 25 Aug 07 - 04:46 PM
Amos 25 Aug 07 - 04:38 PM
Little Hawk 25 Aug 07 - 04:24 PM
Janie 25 Aug 07 - 03:56 PM
Little Hawk 25 Aug 07 - 03:38 PM
Rapparee 25 Aug 07 - 03:03 PM
Little Hawk 25 Aug 07 - 02:01 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Aug 07 - 10:57 AM

I believe your are a non-owner, sirrah, and presumptuous to boot (to hat, also).


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Aug 07 - 09:43 AM

No true outdoorsperson would be caught without their Tilley hat. If they violate any of the Laws of the Wild (natural or man-made) they are forced to actually wear one.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Aug 07 - 03:26 AM

Stilly, you were lucky you didn't throw out some ordinary-looking, yet precious object belonging to your son whilst cleaning that room. Very lucky. Note my earlier post at 7:38 PM, which you may have missed.

By the way, I have encountered exactly the same problems with those damn mattress pads. Just as you describe. It took me about 15 very frustrating minutes to get one back on the mattress a couple of weeks ago (after having washed it). I'd get 2 or 3 corners down and...SPROING!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 Aug 07 - 12:56 AM

My sister swears by them.

19191


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 27 Aug 07 - 12:31 AM

More than one of my Tilley hats may still be riding the currents that flow from Florida Bay, across to the Yucatan, then on down the east coast of South America.

I like to think they follow the migration of the krill.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 Aug 07 - 12:24 AM

As a trained Parks and Rec person (my undergraduate degree) I can attest to the dexterity and ingenious moves that many Park and Rec folks use to approach such novel tasks. But as many of those aforesaid former Park and Rec folk will concur, my first thought and theirs would be "bring the sandblasting stuff to the rock." As Amos already noted.

Thanks, Janie, for thinking of me. I didn't need to exit the window, though I did have to suck in my gut to get between the desk and the couch a couple of times. My back is a bit sore now, but the room is looking great. I warned his dad to bring him home a little later than usual to give me extra time, but not to tell him why. I'd moved and cleaned and rearranged by the time he came in.

There was a dim "why'd you rearrange things?" but as soon as he saw that he can now sit on his couch and easily play his video games, and can easily change out the cables between the games (he used to have to turn the television on the shelf to reach to AV plugs in back--now the shelf is perpendicular to the wall and easy to reach), AND that there is room for both of his guitars and his amp, he relaxed. His bed is repositioned but there is a lot more room now that two ugly shelving units are out. In this high school sophomore's bedroom I bailed out papers going back to the fifth grade (accretion of papers in bins, on which the next year's papers are stacked or a new bin is added, then shoved in the closet or under the desk, etc.) Gum becomes liquid when the sticks sit around in dark places for a really long time. Hard candy becomes soft. Fortunately ants didn't come and carry off his room with all of the food wrappers I found in there.

The sheets, blankets, and mattress pad are all freshly laundered and the bed made. Have you ever tried to put one of those really really stretchy-edged mattress pads on a queen sized bed by yourself? It involves kneeling on the first corner, laying on top between the first and the second corner, sprawling to reach the third corner and being spreadeagled* to reach the fourth. By the time you finish you're sweating so much it doesn't seem like the fresh mattress cover is still as fresh as it was or if it was worth the trouble. I did that twice today, on my bed and on his. What a workout.


*Don't attempt this if you don't have a cell phone in your pocket. If the corners pop off when you're spread out like that you'll be trapped in the mattress cover and must call 911 to have them release you.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 10:39 PM

Well, I suppose you could take out the police station first, with a preliminary charge...then do the rock right after that, and claim that you are a victim of collateral damage. ;-)

Blame it all on "terrorists". Say you saw some swarthy looking types with facial hair and Arab headgear snooping around just before it happened.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 10:36 PM

I was heartbroken during my recent trip to San Jose to discover I had lost my Tilley Air-Flo three-times-through-an-elephant* hat.

Today, on the occasion of my Best Beloved Wife's birthday, I am happy to report that we stopped at a hat store in artsy-fartsy Hillcrest and found its duplicate in my exact size. Plus we had a lovely brunch at Bread & Cie where they make all their own bread. Delicious.

Now that I am again equipped to adventure into the world, I feel renewed. Life is good.

A

(*This is a true story. An animal keeper lost his beloved Tilley hat to the curiousity and appetite of an elephant, and he was so fond of the hat he waited for it to reappear, washed it throughly, and resumed wearing it. This recurred three times. The Tilley company offered him a new one if they could have the 3-times-through-an-elephant hat for their museum; he refused passionately. Tilley owners do not part with their headgear lightly.)

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 09:59 PM

Inukshuks are used in the Arctic as signposts, religious objects, markers of caches, ways to tell others "I went this-a-way", markers of good hunting areas, etc. etc. There are several entire books on them.

An Inukshuk will be the symbol of the Winter Olympic Games in British Columbia. Go to Canada and you'll find them all over. I, as usual, am simply ahead of the rest of the US.

LH, I thought about computing the distance and trajectory necessary, snakeholing the charge, and sending the rock on its way. However, it is presently located about 50 yards from the door to the police station and THAT presents certain problems. I'll probably just ask Parks and Rec to do it -- besides, the folks that have it will load it into a truck for us with a forklift, and the monument company will take it out and reload with one.

Not at all like the old days, when I had to use a chain hoist to load the stones on the truck or to move them around...and skid boards, rollers, dock trucks older than I was, and similar "old fashioned" equipment. Heck, the chain hoist was probably installed in 1888, when the shop was built.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 08:45 PM

Actually, Rapaire, it would be lots easier -- if the rock is where you think it ultimately will stand -- to move the sandblasting equipmet to the rock. It is usually designed to be portable, as you probably know.

That Inukshuk is an interesting thing, a sort of dolmen on steroids. Reminds me of the fields of menhirs one sees in Brittany. What is it about? Whose tradition is it found in?

I know I could get a straight answer from Google, but I thought you might have some depth on the subject.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 08:09 PM

How far away is the local monument company, Rapaire? I need to know so as to calculate the amount of explosives necessary to move your rock the appropriate distance. You also need to position them right or the rock may move in the wrong direction. If that were to happen then it could result in a mishap, such as the rock falling on Dick Cheney's limousine while he's driving through your area. I wouldn't want that to happen to an innocent rock.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 08:05 PM

Beginning to be a little concerned for Maggie. Maybe the window won't open. Maybe her son came home and caught her in the act.

Should we call the fire department?

I liked the Parks & Rec idea, Rapaire. My very favorite way of getting things done is to tell some one else to do them.

Janie


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 07:53 PM

Oh, well, if it's only a case of raising it a few inches, then use a pound or two of plastic explosive...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 07:51 PM

You only have to raise it a few inches.    After all that you have accomplished, this should be as naught. Perhaps you do need that rest.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 07:49 PM

Use 25 pounds of plastic explosive, placed under the rock. The rock will move.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 07:41 PM

About asking Parks and Rec to move the rock? I thought it a pretty good idea. Better and easier than me doing it with skid boards and rollers.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 07:38 PM

Are you sure he isn't spouting codswallop, Amos? I think that malarkey might be a level or two higher than that, somewhere in the region of horsefeathers or bullwhip.

Stilly, when your 15-year old sees what you have done to his room..........! (He will just hate you. For awhile.)

I remember. My mother decided to "clean up" my room one time when I was around that age, and I wasn't there to protect it. Among the "useless" stuff she disposed of or lost in the process was a pencil...a seemingly ordinary pencil with yellow sides and a green ring near the eraser end. I can still picture it perfectly today, 43 years later. That pencil had been given casually to me by Pamela Ford at the end of math class, since I had assisted her in completing a math problem. A few of her molecules were on that pencil. I was desperately in love with Pamela Ford, a girl who was only vaguely aware of my existence, and she gave me that pencil in a moment which I think meant little to her, but a great deal to me. I treasured that pencil with all my heart. It was as close as I was ever going to get to Pamela. I intended to keep it in my care for the rest of my life, take it out now and then, and gaze on it with mournful, longing eyes. I would still have that pencil today, resting in the top drawer of my dresser, if my Mother had not decided to CLEAN OUT MY ROOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAARGGHHHH!!!!!!!

He's going to just hate you. ;-) Here's a tip. Put all the stuff somewhere where he can go through it, just in case....before it gets tossed.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 07:04 PM

Funny you should mention piling up rocks. I'm collecting rocks to build an Inukshuk in the back yard.

I also have to figure out how to move a 600 to 700 pound rock from where it is to the local monument company (so that the Library's brand can be sandblasted in it) and then back to the Library and into the Children's Room.

Actually, I can figure out several ways of doing this, the simplest being to call Parks and Recreation and tell them what I need done.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 06:57 PM

Sir, you are spouting malarkey again, and you know it full well. May I suggest a few days of rest away from computers and books?

Maybe piling up rocks or tatting....



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 05:51 PM

Amos, if you can't predict the outcome of a chess game in the first three moves....

If you'd like, I'll post what the moves would have been.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 12:01 PM

Forget the ocean liners, I'm doing a "while he was out" routine today on my 15-year-old's bedroom. The garage sale will be in two weeks so it makes sense to clean the kid's room now. And if I ask him to do it he'll toss a few Skittles wrappers and a couple of old shoe boxes. I've emptied the closet so far and am now setting the things I know he wants to keep on the shelves. And the rest is getting pushed toward the door. I may wall myself in this way, so if you don't hear from me by dinnertime someone call my next door neighbor and have them come knock on his bedroom window to check on me.

Oh, wait, I could climb out of the bedroom window.

Never mind.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 11:36 AM

Rapaire:

"Qu'elle..." means "That she..." as in "Le truc qu'elle a volé" (The thing that she stole).

You probably meant "Quelle", meaning "What a..." or "Such a..." as in "Quelle bete".

Observe also that "n'est pas" means "isn't" as in "Ceci n'est pas un pipe". But you probably wanted to say "Not so?" which translates as "n'est-ce pas?" -- literally, "not is it so?".

But in any case you are absolutely right; claiming to win a chess game in three moves against an ocean liner is boring in ways I dare not speak.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 11:11 AM

CHECKMATE!!

I win.

Again.

Qu'elle bore, n'est pas?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 10:35 AM

Good one, Amos.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 10:19 AM

Actually it looks like Rapaire is en route to a bad check...


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 01:00 AM

Sounds like a fair deal to me. Stilly, your passenger liner is covering your bishop. Be bold.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 12:37 AM

LH,

Do you take bad checks?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 12:25 AM

QE -> QE2


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 12:24 AM

Well, let me know how it turns out, Rapaire. I guess he's spotting you a move, at least....



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 11:39 PM

Speaking of salve for suffering egos....I have some for sale here. Yup, I have a whole crate of Alfonso's Suffering Ego Salve, copyrighted in 1905. You "can't hardly" find that stuff anymore, you know. It's worth its weight in...well...all kinds of valuable stuff. Really valuable stuff.

I was thinking of selling it on Ebay and making BIG BUCKS, but I'm going to give you people first shot at it.

$25 a tin. That's a good deal! PM me while it lasts!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 10:00 PM

QP->QP3.

Death comes on swift wings, Amos, and strikes when you least expect it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 09:59 PM

fun with genetic codes


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 09:23 PM

The thing is that stupid line of Rapaire's is probably just a chess move, not an expression from organic chemistry or thermodynamic traversals.

"Big Orange said...
BTW, "Victory is mine!" is the absolute FIRST thing I cry out when I make my first move in chess: KP-KP4 "VICTORY IS MINE!"

Rattles up the competition."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 09:20 PM

Damn. I posted in Mandarin, not question marks.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 09:19 PM

l??????????????????r ??'?-?· _ -?—??? ...

?KK -KK~??????KP--KP4????????*???????????????L1? ????????? Amy Semple Mcpherson ???????D-?D|???????E1'??????? ...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 09:14 PM

Notes: Human pancreatic ductal cell carcinoma cell line, which can secrete parathyroid hormone-related peptide (PTHrP), designated as KP 4, and its daughter cell lines with different PTHrP-secreting activities, termed KP 4-1 and KP 4-2, have been established in tissue culture. KP 4 cells were able to form tumors in nude mice. The absolute production rate of PTHrP in KP 4-1 was 5 to 10 times higher than that in KP 4-2. Similarily, the level of PTHrP mRNA in KP 4-1 was significantly higher than that in KP 4-2. KP 4-2 cells exhibited more rapid growth than KP 4 and KP 4-1 in vitro.

Now ask Rapaire to explain why he is playing with nude mice.

It's a disgrace, if you ask me.

If you don't ask me, it is probably perfectly logical.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 09:10 PM

Actually, it might be pretty entertaining to observe Rapaire channel Shirley Temple Black. Or not.

And Rapaire, it is still very painful to reminded of the death of our young cousin. Your mention of it has stirred up so much emotion that I may have to drive to Durham tomorrow morning between 11 and 12, and key the paint jobs on a few of the Lexus' and Mercedes parked in the lot outside of Duke Chapel.

If apprehended by Campus Police, I will simply assert the (Duke Blue) Devil made me do it.

Or, I dunno. Maybe I'll make my son go with me. If caught, I'll blame him. That 'll lairn 'im.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 07:25 PM

I come back after running a few errands and see that the numbers have been just flying off of the shelf! And whatever happened to the Amy Semple McPherson part of the story?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 07:15 PM

Never mind janie. It's just Rapaire. He believes in Manifesting his Superiority Through Obscure Hieroglyphs as a sort of salve to his suffering ego.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 06:13 PM

Huh?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 05:59 PM

KP -> KP4.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 05:58 PM

I once knew a Carolina guy who hadn't ever been in jail AND he wasn't a drunkard.

Of course, he'd died at the age of 3.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 05:31 PM

Humph! Artificial? Artificial, you say? Do you really mean to imply I should stop washing my son's mouth out with soap when he cheers for Duke over Carolina?

Well, I never...!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 04:46 PM

Yep. ;-) We love it. Even war is a gigantic game of a similar sort...but one with extremely destructive rules of play.

There have been many societies for whom war was THE most popular game going.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 04:38 PM

Unfortunately, our species has built in circuits somewhere that makes sickers of us for exactly that sort of synthetic experience.

Anything for a game, eh?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 04:24 PM

Well, it's kind of like football, Janie. What I mean is, it's sort of arbitrary. It works like this: you invent a couple of teams, give them names and players, and send them out onto a field to knock hell out of each other. You teach half the people in the area to cheer for one team, and half to cheer for the other. Everybody starts to think something real is at stake...and that's when the trouble begins.

Artificial division. ;-)

The object of the game? To keep people entertained and to make money for those few who are in charge of the game.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 03:56 PM

LH,

How you can look at any map of our recent elections and say divisions in the US are artificial is beyond me. Red and blue, after all, are both primary colors.

J


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 03:38 PM

Ah...I thought it might be something like that.

Regarding the artificial division of the USA, Rapaire, I think that happened between 1861 and 1865.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 03:03 PM

To be more precise, he learned the northern dialect and accent of the Vietnamese language. You are quite correct, LH, that Vietnam was and is one country, artifically divided as Korea is and Germany was. The US should also be included, I suppose, as we are artifically divided from our Northern states, such as Ontario and Labrador and Alberta. After we reunite with with them we will, of course, have to embark upon a massive campaign to teach our long-separated citizens to speak and spell correctly, of course.

My brother used the example of the P and Q Celtic languages to explain the difference between the dialects of North and South Vietnam and the way he explained it makes sense. You should be able to work it out for yourself from there.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 02:01 PM

I am descended from a very odd lot of people. But then, most people are fairly odd when you get to know them well.


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