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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 19 Dec 04 - 01:00 AM
Acme 18 Dec 04 - 01:42 PM
kindaloupehackenweez 18 Dec 04 - 01:30 PM
Rapparee 18 Dec 04 - 11:56 AM
Amos 18 Dec 04 - 10:29 AM
kindaloupehackenweez 18 Dec 04 - 09:04 AM
kindaloupehackenweez 18 Dec 04 - 06:10 AM
Rustic Rebel 18 Dec 04 - 03:20 AM
Acme 18 Dec 04 - 02:11 AM
Amos 17 Dec 04 - 04:15 PM
Rapparee 17 Dec 04 - 01:43 PM
Acme 17 Dec 04 - 09:55 AM
GUEST,Joseph Conrad 17 Dec 04 - 09:32 AM
MMario 17 Dec 04 - 09:29 AM
Rapparee 17 Dec 04 - 09:18 AM
Acme 16 Dec 04 - 10:22 PM
Amos 16 Dec 04 - 06:40 PM
MMario 16 Dec 04 - 10:16 AM
Acme 16 Dec 04 - 10:03 AM
Rapparee 16 Dec 04 - 09:53 AM
Amos 16 Dec 04 - 01:13 AM
Rustic Rebel 16 Dec 04 - 01:05 AM
Amos 16 Dec 04 - 01:01 AM
Acme 16 Dec 04 - 12:42 AM
Rapparee 15 Dec 04 - 10:43 PM
Acme 15 Dec 04 - 09:16 PM
GUEST,freds 15 Dec 04 - 08:41 AM
Rapparee 14 Dec 04 - 06:46 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 14 Dec 04 - 06:40 PM
Amos 14 Dec 04 - 05:48 PM
Acme 14 Dec 04 - 05:08 PM
Rustic Rebel 13 Dec 04 - 11:55 PM
Rapparee 13 Dec 04 - 06:24 PM
Rapparee 13 Dec 04 - 06:23 PM
Acme 13 Dec 04 - 04:14 PM
Acme 13 Dec 04 - 04:12 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 13 Dec 04 - 09:47 AM
Rapparee 13 Dec 04 - 08:46 AM
42 13 Dec 04 - 06:34 AM
Rapparee 12 Dec 04 - 03:50 PM
Acme 12 Dec 04 - 11:34 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 12 Dec 04 - 01:10 AM
catspaw49 10 Dec 04 - 03:28 PM
Acme 10 Dec 04 - 02:50 PM
MMario 10 Dec 04 - 02:04 PM
Rapparee 10 Dec 04 - 01:53 PM
Acme 09 Dec 04 - 11:08 PM
Rapparee 09 Dec 04 - 10:34 PM
Rapparee 09 Dec 04 - 06:45 PM
Rapparee 09 Dec 04 - 05:57 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Dec 04 - 01:00 AM

Arise and rise up, Oh Mother of All BS!!

For you have promises to keep, and much BS to sow, before you sleep.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 01:42 PM

kindaloupehackenweez, have you mistaken this thread as someplace other than the primier place at Mudcat to discuss BS? Get thyself above the line and start a thread (of course, I don't have a clue as to the song you're discussing, so it might be pure BS!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: kindaloupehackenweez
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 01:30 PM

Greetings Cats: Theres a glitch in my plans to learn the song "The Weight" by the "Band"

I have 2 weeks off from my 5-6 day weeks of 12 hour days and made it a priority to learn the song....Except i cant make out some of the words and was hopeing this may be the place where i can get some assistance. Please..??

4th verse, 3rd line
Crasy Chester followed me and he caught me in the fog.
He said I'd-a-picture-it(I'd appreacate it) if you take jack my dog.

I said wait a minute chester no ???????????? to feed the man.

I think it was ment to be "no money to feed the man" but sounds like anything but that, sounds like the word peaceful is used and has me shaking my head (thats putting it mildly) But if you know the missing words and could communicate them. I'd owe ya one, Well ok two, you fine folks still allow me to take up your time and space. And i'll always owe ya one for that, Thank you for your time and space and fellowship. Its greatly appreacated. Have a great day. Peace.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 11:56 AM

Please don't tell my wife she's permeated my pores. I'll get it treated right away.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 10:29 AM

We all loves you in like wise m'dear. How could we not, for all the pictures you have painted here of Cosmic Anima permeating the pores of our existence?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: kindaloupehackenweez
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 09:04 AM

Oh what a beautiful morning:

I'd like to share a song i heard from the artist that painted my guitar case lids.(1978). Its done with a Irish Jig style, which goes.
Done about as fast as you can say the words:
C                              F                   G
Come on you jolly jumpers, and listen while i humm, as i relate to
                                    C
you the story of the great american bum.
                                           F
From east to west from north to south like swarms of bees to come.   
   G
He sleeps in the dirt and wheres his shirts thats all dirty and full
   C
of crumbs.
                              F                   G
Early in the morning when the due is on the ground the bum arrises
                               C
from his nest and he gazes all around.
                                             F
From the mountain tops of the rockies to the rockman coast of maine
    G                                     C
i've wounder up to Canada and traveled down again.
                                    F
Oh lady would you be kind enough to give me something to eat,
G                                              C
a piece of bread and butter,, a ten foot slice of meat, woo.
(slow down to a single strum / sign will be &)
                               F/&
I am a bum, a jolly good bum, i live like a royal terk.
    G/&          &
I have much luck, bumming my chuck,
(strum again)            C    G/C/C
God blesses the man who works.

Have a Great Day! For this is, "God's recreation of a new day"       (Dont remember who sang thous words but have it written down somewhere
"Morning has broken" is the first line.???Bewildered as usuall.(oops)

And last night was the last night of work for 2 whole weeks..
1st thing on my agenda is learn to play the song "the weight" by the "Band" and after that going to learn a song i was to have learned for a party a month or so back. Done by the group "WEEN" called "Piss up a rope" and after that "Stone temple pilots" "Plush" (acoustic version) I only know how to play by ear so it could take the whole two weeks. Did i mention i was tone deaf..David Allen Coe has a kitty cat song thats a hit pretty dirty thou. Still love to sing it for people one day soon. They get a kick out of it when he does it.?
Thank you for your time and thats mine. "KEEP ON JAMIN" 2 weeks woo!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: kindaloupehackenweez
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 06:10 AM

Back at ya...REB.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 03:20 AM

I love you all.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 02:11 AM

Baaaa humbug (late on Friday that's all I can manage!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Dec 04 - 04:15 PM

Well, come ye with me and I shall make ye a fleecer of men.

Oh...never mind, I see you've already got the t-shirt. :D


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Dec 04 - 01:43 PM

I dunno. I mean, I'd like tell you...no, I will. Every spring I again become my secret identity and help out on sheep farms.

Yes, now it can be told.

I'm really...The Secret Shearer!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Dec 04 - 09:55 AM

Well, it wasn't going to cause an Apocalypse now, or anything, ya' know what I mean? Just a little harmless fun. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Joseph Conrad
Date: 17 Dec 04 - 09:32 AM

Thank you.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 17 Dec 04 - 09:29 AM

nah - milking the heart of darkness is no good - bitter.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Dec 04 - 09:18 AM

Well, in the past week or so a guy living in North Liberty, Indiana (just outside of South Bend and famous for its rolling fields of mint) was killed by a wildebeest (or gnu).

Really.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Dec 04 - 10:22 PM

Ilk, schmilk, I was hoping you guy's'd milk Heart of Darkness some more!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Dec 04 - 06:40 PM

You'll never get any gnus from ilk, MM -- at least not until you find out who they are ilk to.   Gnus never talk about themselves. It's part of tyheir ethical code -- no news is good gnus.

Sorry...


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 16 Dec 04 - 10:16 AM

aren't gun a form of ilk? I know we've discussed ilk.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Dec 04 - 10:03 AM

Kirk, Kurtz. . . You missed the boat, so to speak. . .different river this time, RR.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Dec 04 - 09:53 AM

But...I did go down to the banks of the Mississippi as a child and suck on a bottle. I was born in a hospital in a town on the banks of that river, a mere 20 or so miles from Hannibal, Missouri, right in the heart of Mark Twain country. Hell's bells, I used to go drinkin' with Sam Clemens, Huck Finn, Tom Sawyer and Jim, while ol' Becky Thatcher danced on the bar (that whole thing in the book about Tom and Becky and the cave -- it's accurate, but you gotta read it Freudianly). But that was in my college days, because I certainly wouldn't violate the laws about under-age drinking. Never will forget the night Sammy (we called SC either "Sammy" or, if we wanted to make him fightin' mad, "Clemmy") and us got drunk and "borrowed" a steamboat. We headed upriver -- Sam was fixin' to take me home by steamboat, 'cause I was "too damned pie-eyed, blind-horse drunk" (in Sam's opinion) to drive home and certainly too drunk to sing or play the calliope. Yeah,

I remember that magical night one summer, maybe it was the summer of '63, a very special time for me...no, couldn't have been '63 'cause I spent that summer at Fort Lostinthewoods...maybe it was '64 or '65...anyway, it was a magical night one summer when I took my ax down to the banks of the Mississippi and blew long and cool all night, just wailin' out my heart through the trumpet while the stars overhead listened, the mist risin' off the water like ghosts of past loves and hurt conjured up by the music, the skeeters liken to carry me off and the dogs howlin'...mighta been '66 or even '67, I guess. Anyway, I remember. Je me souviens.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Dec 04 - 01:13 AM

RR:

Take one for me too--you almost had me escaping into the Other Universe there!!!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 16 Dec 04 - 01:05 AM

Seems to me like ya all run out of usefull things to talk about.
that is my opinion, and I'm stickin' to it.

The whole thing is, this thread has been entirely useless from the git, and so I am only adding another useless entry unto a gallery of useless, yet completely beneficial knowledge.
Believe it if you want to.
Go ahead on, all who want to revel in the Mother and suckle on the fullness of the bosom and feel quite quaintly adept in the warmth of the mothers breast.
You are the only child inside the womb of the mother that feels like a number,and wants to go to the banks of the Mississippi and suck down a jug of wine and remember that you always wore bangs when you were a child because that was what your destiny called for and your father insisted upon...........Oh fuck I think i need a pill........


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Dec 04 - 01:01 AM

Actually, I think his Scots forebears refer to him as the Fart of Harkness...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Dec 04 - 12:42 AM

You mean. . . his is the art of darkness?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Dec 04 - 10:43 PM

The horror! The horror!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Dec 04 - 09:16 PM

Seems about time for Shatner to show is aged face again. Or is he too busy for the MOAB and the 'cat now that he's working again?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,freds
Date: 15 Dec 04 - 08:41 AM

From a distant galaxy, we send you our wishes for a Happy and Prosperous and Joyfilled and Peaceful Nxtanortdya!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Dec 04 - 06:46 PM

Don't forgit the horses er the Idaho Legion'll come an' ride ya down.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 14 Dec 04 - 06:40 PM

A new what! Or did you mean "A gnu!" I don't believe we've ever had a gnu on the MOAB. Let's take a quick look in the fully anotated and cross-referenced index... Nope. I was right. Camels, armadillos, cows and possums but no gnus.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Dec 04 - 05:48 PM

Anew! Anew!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Dec 04 - 05:08 PM

Busy day: here's a quickie (boost up, that is!)   :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 13 Dec 04 - 11:55 PM

I know a guy who fell off a barn roof at a party. We all watched him fall then we didn't see him for awhile. I think he layed where he fell and passed out for awhile.

I was thinking to myself, I am running out of bullshit to talk about so I grabbed my dictionary and told myself I'd open the book and whatever I pointed at was my topic of bullshit.

   - Hobbledehoy -

Purely incidental, the book says the word is based on English dialect-hob-a rustic- but beside that, I've never met a hobbledehoy I didn't like. Hell, I've never met a hobbledehoy I couldn't tame.
I know a few hobbledehoy's but I think Michael Jackson has a little bit more experience on the subject. (ouch)

I once saw a hobbledehoy,
Who was dancing with zest and joy.
I watched as he danced full of life
No worry, no grief, no strife.
And when he was through,
I said, "I'm sorry for you,
because your hobbledehoy days are soon through."
"See, your growing up and the world is rough,
and if a man's gonna make it, you gotta be tough.
So I give you that name, and I said goodbye
Knew you have to get tough or die.
A lot of this is trash,
and some is Johnny Cash
But, listen to the words I cry,
because bullshit, will never die.
Rustic, trying hard to understand where has the mother gone when you really need her?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Dec 04 - 06:24 PM

Actually, he used a High Wall .45-70 Government, but I didn't want to cause people to ask me questions, like, "What the hell??"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Dec 04 - 06:23 PM

Repel...rappel...they both fit.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Dec 04 - 04:14 PM

Of course, she needs to remember how to spell it first--rappel.

sheesh!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Dec 04 - 04:12 PM

This Mother can repel, she doesn't need to fall or bounce.

"Belay on!"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 13 Dec 04 - 09:47 AM

You made thet story up, Rapeere! If it wuz true he wudda shot 'er wif a "thuhty-thuhty", not no danged ".30-30". An' ya didn' say a word 'bout how Aint Retty's bouncin' got all th' dawgs an' hawgs an' chickens all het up.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Dec 04 - 08:46 AM

Ah'm reminded of the time mah Aunt Retty fell offen the roof of the barn whilst she was re-roofin' it. Uncle Nate told her ta rope herself to the weathervane, but Aunt Retty said nah, her new steel bustle would be sure and take up the fall if she fell. Well, fall she did, and sure nuff, the bustle worked jist like a big ol' coil spring, only it sprung poor ol' Aunt Retty right up into the sky, plumb through clouds and everything. Aunt Retty come down, and bounced right back up. Down and up, down and up, fer days and days. Finally Uncle Nate got his .30-30 and shot her out of pity so's that she wouldn't starve ta death.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: 42
Date: 13 Dec 04 - 06:34 AM

thank you dear! anytime. MOM


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 03:50 PM

Mom, I'm soooooooooooooooooooooooo sorry. That nasty ol' Bee-Dubya let you faw down an go boom. Did u bruisy u bumbum? Mean ol' Bee-Dubya! Make him kiss it and make it better!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 11:34 AM

She bounces, BWL. And she was in great shape, after laughing so hard a few days back. I think a truss will do it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 01:10 AM

Take a couple of days off to try and make a few bucks and you shitbirds let Mom fall off the page. Sheesh!

Well' she's not mortally injured, but she's probably gonna need a hip replacement. And you guys know she's not old enough for Medicare. Any ideas about where we're gonna find the money? I sure don't have it to spare.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: catspaw49
Date: 10 Dec 04 - 03:28 PM

Well then just sing Amazing Grace to The Addams Family Theme. Doesn't scan quite as well as Gilligan, but it's a whole lot funnier!

Spaw


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 10 Dec 04 - 02:50 PM

I don't think I know the Banana Boat Song. Hum a few bars?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 10 Dec 04 - 02:04 PM

Gilligan's Island, the Adams Family Theme and the Banana Boat Song

the triumverate of U.S. Triumph!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Dec 04 - 01:53 PM

My candle burns at both its ends
It will not last the...ouch! Goddamnit! Sucker burned me!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Dec 04 - 11:08 PM

Ah, yes, All Your Base Are Belong to Us. It isn't the theme song to Gilligan's Island, that's for sure!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 04 - 10:34 PM

Unforgiven...suppuku awaits.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 04 - 06:45 PM

Sorry. Got a bit carried away there. Didn't mean to let the cat out of the bag, so to speak, on how we're going to take over our Neighbor To The North. John Ashcroft has forgiven me; why can't you?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 04 - 05:57 PM

And now that you've heard the music, you will never, EVER be able to forget it! It is now indelibly impressed upon you brain, replacing such things as The Maple Leaf Forever and Blame Canada. All your brain belong to us! BWAAHAHAHAHA!!


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