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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 06 Apr 10 - 05:51 PM
Rapparee 06 Apr 10 - 05:32 PM
Rapparee 06 Apr 10 - 01:20 PM
MMario 06 Apr 10 - 01:18 PM
Acme 06 Apr 10 - 12:09 PM
Rapparee 06 Apr 10 - 10:24 AM
Eiseley 06 Apr 10 - 12:02 AM
Eiseley 06 Apr 10 - 12:00 AM
Rapparee 05 Apr 10 - 11:51 PM
GUEST,Eiseley 05 Apr 10 - 06:44 PM
GUEST,Eiseley 05 Apr 10 - 06:43 PM
Acme 05 Apr 10 - 06:26 PM
Little Hawk 05 Apr 10 - 06:19 PM
Rapparee 05 Apr 10 - 05:06 PM
Rapparee 05 Apr 10 - 11:04 AM
Amos 05 Apr 10 - 10:59 AM
MMario 05 Apr 10 - 10:39 AM
Rapparee 05 Apr 10 - 10:35 AM
Amos 05 Apr 10 - 07:47 AM
Amos 05 Apr 10 - 07:27 AM
Acme 04 Apr 10 - 10:55 PM
Amos 04 Apr 10 - 10:30 PM
Eiseley 04 Apr 10 - 09:16 PM
Acme 04 Apr 10 - 08:53 PM
Rapparee 04 Apr 10 - 08:18 PM
Rapparee 04 Apr 10 - 07:15 PM
Little Hawk 04 Apr 10 - 06:01 PM
Amos 04 Apr 10 - 05:32 PM
Rapparee 04 Apr 10 - 03:50 PM
Amos 04 Apr 10 - 01:47 PM
Rapparee 04 Apr 10 - 01:08 PM
Amos 04 Apr 10 - 10:45 AM
Rapparee 04 Apr 10 - 09:08 AM
Amos 03 Apr 10 - 11:39 PM
Amos 03 Apr 10 - 11:27 PM
Amos 03 Apr 10 - 11:14 PM
Eiseley 03 Apr 10 - 10:21 PM
Rapparee 03 Apr 10 - 10:01 PM
Eiseley 03 Apr 10 - 09:56 PM
Rapparee 03 Apr 10 - 09:51 PM
Acme 03 Apr 10 - 09:40 PM
Eiseley 03 Apr 10 - 09:36 PM
Rapparee 03 Apr 10 - 08:54 PM
Acme 03 Apr 10 - 08:51 PM
Little Hawk 03 Apr 10 - 07:48 PM
Amos 03 Apr 10 - 07:09 PM
Rapparee 03 Apr 10 - 05:13 PM
Amos 03 Apr 10 - 02:54 PM
Eiseley 03 Apr 10 - 10:50 AM
Rapparee 03 Apr 10 - 10:22 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Apr 10 - 05:51 PM

I bet it was pretty easy to discover a college campus.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Apr 10 - 05:32 PM

I know something Kleinefalke don't know,
Kleinefalke don't know,
etc.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Apr 10 - 01:20 PM

You keep talkin' that scientific-type stuff and Mom's gonna wash yer mouth out with SOAP.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 06 Apr 10 - 01:18 PM

Te salute!

One of the oldest dawn redwoods in the US outside of botanical gardens is on a college campus down the street from our house.....it was donated shortly after they were discovered.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Apr 10 - 12:09 PM

Metasequoia glpytostroboides

(Dawn redwood)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Apr 10 - 10:24 AM

Tsk, tsk. The Latin for "railroad" is "ferrívia" and Asterix knows it. Just the other night, up at the Legion Hovel, he and Obelix and Psychoanalytix and Gibtermine and Metallurgix were sitting around, drinking and in general calling Romans nasty names in Gaulish, when Asterix asked, right out loud, "Quidquid id est timeo puellas et oscula dantes in ferrivia" and gave Obelix a big hug.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 06 Apr 10 - 12:02 AM

Last Prime of the Thirty-Four Kay!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 06 Apr 10 - 12:00 AM

What is that translated into Latin, Rapaire?

Oh, I thought that was ut.

As in:
Asterix: "Railroad transitus , caveo cars. Quam operor vos alica ut vacuus ullus Rs?"

Obelix: U-T.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 11:51 PM

Cogito cogito cogito, ergo cogito cogito sum, cogito.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Eiseley
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 06:44 PM

And They deleted it. Darn!
This is what it said:
Stilly, the motto of that school in Tuscon is, I believe, "Truth, Knowledge, a Good Tan."

What is that translated into Latin, Rapaire?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Eiseley
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 06:43 PM

That last Guest post was from me at work.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 06:26 PM

I had a couple of my own, and though I don't want them to feel like second class citizens, some of the repairs and repainting are waiting until they're not always underfoot. It'd be nice for them to enjoy the updates while they're here, but they probably wouldn't notice and they might continue to scuff the paint.

Paid for tickets to Tuscon. This kid is gonna go see the new digs.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 06:19 PM

Dum-de-dum. Dee doo. (humming a little tune here)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 05:06 PM

Oh, Mom! Again I find you consorting with the bottom feeders! Whatever shall we do with you?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 11:04 AM

I have two grand-nephews which do enough damage for ten or twelve. Would you like to borrow one or both?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 10:59 AM

WOnderful. It's a good thing you are a confirmed bachelor to keep the averages down!! :D

I too have a lovely grand-niece who is making headway in the ICU, and will be coming home soon with her heart repaired; she just needs to start swallowing her food regularly. Fingers crossed. This has been a very dicey arrival.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 10:39 AM

I have a new Great Niece as of yesterday afternoon.....

This makes 8, I believe. No great-nephews.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 10:35 AM

I don't think I'll post here any more






























or any less.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 07:47 AM

Even the bears have dreams of things they've seen
Or hungered to see.
In browns like trees, and summer greens,
Places to be.
Not plagued by fear of predators or guns,
Full of fine foods, lady bears coy,
Delights, like summer morning runs
And other bear joys.
In the deepest of bear dreams is
The darkest green
Where being a bear is itself
Considered possible.

Alf Deneuve
Catawba, Arkansas
"Letters to the Editor"
Catawba Sun Journal
Dec. 11, 1988


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Apr 10 - 07:27 AM

I am on the road this noon, heading for the sleepy city of Oakland, California with stops in Paso Robles and various roadside rest areas.

Have a wonderful week and don't let Mom down!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 10:55 PM

There is an Amazon ad on this page, with a link for a GUESS Folk Shirt, Green New $79.00. I don't think Folk and $79.00 shirts often go together, do you?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 10:30 PM

Mom:

It's been a very strained and stressful week between one thing and another, but tonight we went out to a beautiful Spanish restaurant and had a lovely celebratory dinner to observe our thirty-first anniversary.

Long ago, and far away, in a kingdom by the sea,

I married up to my best-beloved, and she married up to me!!

Yeeehaw!!

I love green threads!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 09:16 PM

After Rapaire's adventures I'm just glad I was out of town this weekend. And I stopped subscribing to the paper after the press used some pretty lurid shades of yellow journalism some time ago. I guess all the news of the Legion I'll get is what I read here. Maybe that's for the best.

Now I'll go thread up my needles!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 08:53 PM

Wear sandals.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 08:18 PM

Every so often I'll say, "Darn those socks! There's another hole in them!"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 07:15 PM

Well...they've only got two cartridge right now and they can count them within a half hour or so. One's for a .90-50 Sharps buffalo rifle (NOT one of the guns that won The West) and the other is for a Dreyse Zündnadelgewehr. The new CG locked up the armory just before the riot and swallowed the key.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 06:01 PM

Nothing lasts forever, Eiseley, but the real gift of life is always in the present, not in past glories or imagined futures that may never come. Knowing this, you can thoroughly enjoy darning those socks that will one day end up in the trash...just like everything else we think we own (our bodies included).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 05:32 PM

It's so nice to see the boys out playing instead of holed up in that stupid smoley old cave of theirs counting bullets.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 03:50 PM

Well, there was a small riot -- one involving no more than a couple hundred people -- when the story came out today and it was found that the press had spelled "Smyte-Withers" with an "i" and not a "y". The General-Feldmarschall und Oberste Führer auf der Legion von Idaho pleaded for calm, but since she was holding the offending reporter at arms' length by his tie from a bridge over raging Portneuf River falls it fell on deaf ears.

When it was over and the pepper gas had dissipated somewhat, "Red" O'Moore was heard to say that he hadn't had such fun since they ambushed the Black-and-Tans between Liverpool and Dunleary. Even the cops enjoyed it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 01:47 PM

About time. THe whole LEgion was going stale.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 01:08 PM

(Riters, Pocatello, Idaho) Last night at a Change of Command Ceremony, the Colonel-General Smite-Withers of the Idaho Legion stepped down saying, "I'm really thirsty...who's buyin'?" She turned the post over to Roxanne Smite-Withers, to whom she is related by some sort of genetic trick. "Poxy Roxy", as the new Commandant is known to one and all, will assume the rank of General-Feldmarschall und Oberste Führer auf der Legion von Idaho.

Poxy Roxy bought drinks for the house. Her assumption of command was celebrated in the usual ways, finally involving the police.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 10:45 AM

You knew Winni Dithyramb??? You really are someone terribly important, I see.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Apr 10 - 09:08 AM

You used the word "onto" instead of "on." I used to know her and she'd...well, never mind. Nihil boni and all that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 11:39 PM

Boy,, that WInifred was really onto something...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 11:27 PM

The blades of war, the swords, the drums,
The blood that alway sfinally comes.
Are not the song, the words, the measure,
Neither the joy nor yet the treasure.
They are the darking beast of ground
That gives the shadow to the sound
The mindless hum and mortal beat
Of cello, snare and tympani.
To all these, there is nothing wrong,
But none of them is quite the song.
Monsters of time, beggars of rest
Do not perceive the hidden breast,
And never hear the upper voice
That sings above their ill-fit noise.
Should you measure by their time
The steps and leaps you tell your mind
Only these paths will drive you wrong
While wishing you had heard the song.
Measures are numbered, two and two
But only the song is always true.


Winifred Dithyramb III
Whimsy on Overdrive
Slatterns and Gulls, pubs.
Bongville, W. Va., 1998


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 11:14 PM

I would be honored if you have spares, not that Iwear socks very often, but just for ther honor of the thing, you see.

But bear in mind th e futile flapperies are merely accompaniment to the true song.

Inside, the true song always sings true.

It involves the evolution of your, and our, destiny.

Teaching children the magic of books is an excellent example of the evolution of our destiny.

Red sox, not so much.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 10:21 PM

It all seems so futile: Red Sox games, war, even knitting socks that will eventually just get holes in them. But for all the futility I'll keep knitting. It's a way to add a little warmth and beauty to the world.

Would anyone like a pair of socks?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 10:01 PM

Just for that, here's one of MY favorite poems....

Channel Firing
by Thomas Hardy (1840-1928)

That night your great guns, unawares,
Shook all our coffins as we lay,
And broke the chancel window-squares,
We thought it was the Judgement-day

And sat upright. While drearisome
Arose the howl of wakened hounds:
The mouse let fall the altar-crumb,
The worms drew back into their mounds,

The glebe-cow drooled. Till God called, `No;
It's gunnery practice out at sea
Just as before you went below;
The world is as it used to be:

`All nations striving strong to make
Red war yet redder. Mad as hatters
They do no more for Christés sake
Than you that are helpless in such matters.

`That this is not the judgement-hour
For some of them's a blessed thing,
For if it were they'd have to scour
Hell's floor for so much threatening...

`Ha, ha. It will be warmer when
I blow the trumpet (if indeed
I ever do; for you are men,
And rest eternal sorely need).'

So down we lay again. `I wonder,
Will the world ever saner be,'
Said one, `than when He sent us under
In our indifferent century!'

And many a skeleton shook his head.
`Instead of preaching forty year,'
My neighbour Parson Thirdly said,
`I wish I had stuck to pipes and beer.'

Again the guns disturbed the hour,
Roaring their readiness to avenge,
As far inland as Stourton Tower,
And Camelot, and starlit Stonehenge.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 09:56 PM

Oh go back to church!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 09:51 PM

Ode To My Sox
by Pablum Nearnudie

Boston gave me
red sox
And they had not
won anything
for more
years
than you can count
because
of
the
Curse of a Bambino

and then they
beat the Yankees
from New York
and after that
they
lose
year
after year
after year
after year

They are
the
Cubs
of the Northeast
always hoping
never winning
with their
toes sticking out
of the front
of their
Sox

      --trans. from the Erse by
      Phaeton James Entwhistle IV


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 09:40 PM

Careful, attributing poems to real poets around here can get you into trouble. Just so you know.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 09:36 PM

One of my favorites!

Ode to My Socks
By Pablo Neruda
(Translated by Margaret Sayers Peden)


Maru Mori brought me
a pair
of socks
knitted with her own
shepherd's hands,
two socks soft
as rabbits.
I slipped
my feet into them

as if
into
jewel cases
woven
with threads of
dusk
and sheep's wool

Audacious socks,
my feet became
two woolen
fish,
two long sharks
of lapis blue
shot
with a golden thread,
two mammoth blackbirds,
two cannons,
thus honored
were
my feet
by
these
celestial
socks.
They were
so beautiful
that for the first time
my feet seemed
unacceptable to me,
two tired old
fire fighters
not worthy
of the woven
fire
of those luminous
socks.

Nonetheless,
I resisted
the strong temptation
to save them
the way schoolboys
bottle
fireflies,
the way scholars
hoard

sacred documents.
I resisted
the wild impulse
to place them in a cage
of gold
and daily feed them
birdseed
and rosy melon flesh.
Like explorers who in the forest
surrender a rare
and tender deer
to the spit
and eat it
with remorse,
I stuck out my feet
and pulled on
the
handsome
socks,
and then my shoes.


So this is
the moral of my odes:
twice beautiful
is beauty
and what is good is doubly
good
when it is a case of two
woolen socks
in wintertime.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 08:54 PM

Promiscuous, persnickety, parsimonious, placating, partial perversion of percolating pomposity.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 08:51 PM

And all of this P stuff brings up Pablo Neruda in the Google Ads?

Ppffffttt!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 07:48 PM

Pathetic. Pompous. Puerile.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 07:09 PM

Post-prandial priapism, you peripatetic perjurer!!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 05:13 PM

Poo!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 02:54 PM

Providing prudence has been properly projected in preparation, yes.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 10:50 AM

Patient patent tending portends potent patterns for potential pleasures.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Apr 10 - 10:22 AM

Thirteen hours??? On something that was patent?? Geez, you sure do mess around a lot at work. One would think that a patent patent would be simple to do -- maybe an hour, tops.


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