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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Bunnahabhain 16 Jun 06 - 07:40 AM
Amos 15 Jun 06 - 11:01 PM
Rapparee 15 Jun 06 - 09:54 PM
Amos 15 Jun 06 - 08:29 PM
Amos 15 Jun 06 - 07:07 PM
Rapparee 15 Jun 06 - 06:47 PM
Acme 15 Jun 06 - 04:15 PM
Bunnahabhain 15 Jun 06 - 03:52 PM
Rapparee 15 Jun 06 - 02:27 PM
Amos 15 Jun 06 - 11:41 AM
Rapparee 15 Jun 06 - 11:29 AM
Amos 15 Jun 06 - 11:03 AM
Rapparee 15 Jun 06 - 09:03 AM
Rapparee 14 Jun 06 - 09:21 PM
Amos 14 Jun 06 - 08:18 PM
Amos 14 Jun 06 - 07:24 PM
Rapparee 14 Jun 06 - 05:49 PM
MMario 14 Jun 06 - 04:23 PM
Acme 14 Jun 06 - 04:20 PM
MMario 14 Jun 06 - 03:57 PM
Bunnahabhain 14 Jun 06 - 03:53 PM
Rapparee 14 Jun 06 - 03:18 PM
Amos 14 Jun 06 - 12:25 PM
MMario 14 Jun 06 - 10:44 AM
Rapparee 14 Jun 06 - 10:32 AM
MMario 14 Jun 06 - 10:00 AM
Amos 14 Jun 06 - 09:53 AM
Acme 14 Jun 06 - 09:50 AM
Amos 14 Jun 06 - 09:34 AM
MMario 14 Jun 06 - 09:03 AM
Rapparee 14 Jun 06 - 08:38 AM
MMario 14 Jun 06 - 08:30 AM
Acme 14 Jun 06 - 12:01 AM
Rapparee 13 Jun 06 - 09:51 PM
Amos 13 Jun 06 - 04:07 PM
MMario 13 Jun 06 - 04:06 PM
Rapparee 13 Jun 06 - 04:01 PM
Acme 13 Jun 06 - 03:58 PM
Rapparee 13 Jun 06 - 02:29 PM
Amos 13 Jun 06 - 11:50 AM
MMario 13 Jun 06 - 11:04 AM
Rapparee 13 Jun 06 - 10:59 AM
Acme 13 Jun 06 - 10:37 AM
MMario 13 Jun 06 - 09:36 AM
Amos 13 Jun 06 - 09:34 AM
Rapparee 13 Jun 06 - 08:58 AM
Bunnahabhain 13 Jun 06 - 08:36 AM
Little Hawk 12 Jun 06 - 11:44 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 12 Jun 06 - 11:37 PM
Rapparee 12 Jun 06 - 11:22 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 07:40 AM

Rapiere seems worryingly keen on 'discipline'. Is there a side to the Idaho Legion that we don't know about?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 11:01 PM

Oh, TOP drawer, sir! Huzzah!


ROFLMA


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 09:54 PM

For your edification, some poetry from Hector Bluwbalz, Plagarist Laureate of Corn Creek, Idaho. These are taken from his Uncollected Works (Boise: BDM Press, 2006)

There ain't nothin'
Like my breath
To send you miles away,
Or any poetry like mine
To make you waste a day.


                -- Hector Bluwbalz, My Poetry, 1994


Because I could not stop for Mom
She kindly stopped for me,
The threads held just two of us,
And Amos and Stilly and Bunn and Bee-Dubya-Ell and Tweed and Khandu and Peace and Little Hawk and Rapaire and just all sorts of other whackos.

                -- Hector Bluwbalz, Because, 2005

I heard a fly buzz as I died,
So I hit it a good smack
And I revived
'Cause no damn fly is gonna upstage my deathbed.


                -- Hector Bluwbalz, I heard a fly, 1988


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 08:29 PM

Tell ya what, Stilly, let's be nice to Brother Rapaire. I mean -- after all-- he DID leave in a lot of good bits. :>D


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 07:07 PM

Actually, I submit that we are already quite disciplined -- enough, at least, to honor the sources of our rlelentless borrowings.

But, noooooo.

That would spoil all the fun, eh??

:D


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 06:47 PM

Mom! Stilly's being mean to me too, I think! Just because I have access to the von und zu Weltenshaungbilderzeitgeist Collection Of Ancient Rare Manuscripts And Plays And Poems and they don't! Discipline them! Discipline them!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 04:15 PM

That'll do it, Bunn. And I agree with Amos.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 03:52 PM

How about 200 posts worth of Community service, for all those times when Mom is close to the bottom, and the rest of us are ill disposed?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 02:27 PM

Mom! Amos is abusing me again (I think). All I've done is track down quotes from plays that never quite made, Mom, and Amos says I'm stealing them! Punish him! Make him go to church or something!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 11:41 AM

Your borrowings, my sticky-fingered friend, grow defter with practice. The day will come when you will be able to re-post the whole MOAB, signing each entry as your own, and automate the process to boot, so you will never want for posting.

God knows, once you have deployed and debugged such a program, what you woudl do with yyourself, though. ;>)

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 11:29 AM

Our postings now are ended. These our actors,        
As I foretold you, were all spirits, and              
Are melted into air, into thin air;        
And, like the baseless fabric of the Mudcat,        
The cloud-capp'd towers, the gorgeous postings,        
The solemn songsters, the great Cafe itself,              
Yea, all which it inherit, shall dissolve        
And, like an insubstantial pageant faded,        
Leave not a thread behind. We are such stuff        
As dreams are made on, and our little life              
Is rounded with a sleep (except, of course, for MOAB,
For such sublime artistry goes on forever).


                      -- Ann H. Shakespeare, The Teapot, 1601.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 11:03 AM

Ver' impressive sirrah.

My considered opinion is, that if there is indeed safety in numbers, as the old wives are wont to say, then it cannot be gainsaid that our MOAB is the safest thread on the whole Mudcat.

It is a bastion of security in an endless plain of rolling significance, with scattered threads of blue genius flowing among it, and clumps of vitriol visible here and there. MOAB is the inner tower, and the donjon keep, and the calm center that holds when all else splashes and gyres in the woolying wabe.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 09:03 AM

Full flagon five thy father lies;
Of his beers are urine made;
Those are closed that were his eyes:
Nothing of him that remains conscious
But doth suffer a sea-change
Into something disgusting and drunken.
Bar-maids hourly ring his tot:
   "Ya stupid, drunken sot!"

          -- Billy B. Shakespeare, The Tosspot.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 09:21 PM

Now o'er one half the world nature seems dead
And wicked drinks abuse the troubled sleep.
Brewcraft celebrates jovial Bacchus' offering
And the wetted sot, alarmed by his flagon showing bottom,
Howls at his watch, and with the drunkard's staggering steps
Toward the barrel moves like a goat.
Oh, thou sure and firm-set Earth, hear not my steps
Which way they wend for fear the very stones come up and meet me!

(A bung is started.)

I go, and it is done. The cup invites me.
Drink it down, Duncan, for it is a knell
That calls you to imbibe in something swell!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 08:18 PM

Whoops!

..I have thee not, and yet I see thee still.
Art thou not, fatal vision, sensible
To feeling as to sight? or art thou but
A dagger of the mind, a false creation,
Proceeding from the heat-oppressed brain?
I see thee yet, in form as palpable
As this which now I draw.
Thou marshall'st me the way that I was going;
And such an instrument I was to use.
Mine eyes are made the fools o' the other senses,
Or else worth all the rest


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 07:24 PM

I think that was Jules Mac Seezer.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 05:49 PM

The "sottish" play? I don't remember that much drinking in Macbeth.

Oh, wait

Is this a flagon I see before me, its handle towards my hand?
Come! Let me clutch thee!...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 04:23 PM

Are you saying 'twas naught but a Midsummers Night Dream?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 04:20 PM

If you try to take that argument any further you'll find it was much ado about nothing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 03:57 PM

The Sottish Play? IN AUGUST?

August is for 'As you Like it'.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 03:53 PM

Good question, but I have to save my yearly ration of that phrase for the festival here. It get used alot, and by the performers as much as the Audience. Not surprising when you run into an all lesbian perfomance of Macbeth, being staged in japanese on the top of a double decker bus, and it seems normal, as it's August...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 03:18 PM

I dunno...what the fuck WAS that all about?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 12:25 PM

That's the way it always is with those who create artificial and synthetic mysteries merely to augment their imaginary sense of power over others. It gets WAY more complex than the truth ever was, and a nest of tanglefoot starts to grow around the participants until their minds are boggled and dragged into numbness. All because someone couldn't speak plainly in the first place. Isn't that a terrible waste? It's downright...anti-social.

Unless it is just humor, in which case everyone has a good laugh and goes home wondering ("What the fuck was that all about???")...


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 10:44 AM

How do we know we don't know until you tell us?

It may be that we know, but we don't know that we know, because what we know is not what we think you are talking about that we don't know.

Or it could be that what we don't know is what you think we don't know, but if you tell us then we will know.

But If we do know, then when you tell us we can tell you we know, so you will know that we knew and you didn't have to tell us so that we would know because we new, possibly we gnu.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 10:32 AM

Well, if you really don't know, I'll tell you later.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 10:00 AM

that is perfectly understandable, Amos. Jack gets around. A lot.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 09:53 AM

Many poeple knew Watt. But even more claim to have known Jack.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 09:50 AM

Fillo dough Appetizers. They might be nice. I love spinach pie.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 09:34 AM

Mystery man, mystery man,
Make a mystery while you can!
Make believe it's really big!
Talk in Latin, dance a jig,
Wave your arms and have some fun;
but you ain't fooling anyone.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 09:03 AM

*grin* google ads are for lettuce and vergetable seeds!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 08:38 AM

Oh fer...! I knew you wouldn't know! Geez, doncha read the news?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 08:30 AM

Who knew WatT?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 12:01 AM

Knew what?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 09:51 PM

I'd be willing to bet that no one on MOAB, and possibly in all of the Mudcat Cafe, knew that! Really a surprise, no?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 04:07 PM

Stuffing the egg plant is just the kind of work for a glowing pickle. I would root for the stuffing, any time.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 04:06 PM

Pepper your comments witloof chicory phrase, I don't carrot all.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 04:01 PM

Let us auberguine the beguine.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 03:58 PM

Take your eggplant and stuff it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 02:29 PM

Then lettuce begin, unless you don't carrot all that you've bean chard by romaine around the fire only parsley clothed. Don't turnip your nose either, for vegetables can't be beet.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 11:50 AM

I am glad to see we have managed to keep our sense of hummus about all this.

Beware s/he who awakens the vegetables, and maketh the pickle to glow.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 11:04 AM

hummus is made from teeny chick pees tahini and chickpeas. But occasionally garnished with cucumbers (or Cowcumbers as they used to be known)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 10:59 AM

Cucumbers are hummurous, then?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 10:37 AM

The rich feeders around my house prefer well-drained hummus. With a little olive oil drizzled on top.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 09:36 AM

well - they must have been fertile times - cucumbers are heavy feeders, liking a rich, well drained soil high in humus.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 09:34 AM

That page -- or one like it -- is also the inspiration for one of the great all-time Mudcat songs, which can be found be sung by Bert here. And the topic of Incandescent Pickles also inspired this song around the same time. Very fertile times.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 08:58 AM

Ya oughta see what happens to Peeps. No, on second thought, you wouldn't. It's...it's...just awful!!

And yeah, I noticed the ads too. And I do know how to use a semicolon, 'cause the nuns who taught me grammar in grammar school gave me a semicolonoscopy right there in front of the class and everyone. And I was shamed by it, I tell you, shamed!! There I was, an innocent second grader, left in front of the class with my participle dangling, my articles exposed for all to see, and a semicolonoscope stuck in my gerund! This event warped me. From that moment on I was turned from the paths of righteousness; when I got home even my mother commented upon it (note the semicolon!). She said, "Son, you have no right to sing the blues!" and I told her what had happened and she gave me the words and music to everything Blind Lemon Jefferson, Robert Johnson, and Leadbelly every sang. That brought me to folk music and before you knew it I'd given up singing "Doggie In The Window" and was strummin' a Martin Airdreadnought and singin' "Goober Peas" and "Little Joe the Wrangler" and "Whorehouse Bells Were Ringing" and "Lily of the West" and "Lorena" and "Ten Thousand Goddamn Cattle." Never again was I picked to sing solo at the annual Christmas Play. Never again was I trusted to sing backup doowop in the church choir. Finally, my fall was completed and I took up the trumpet.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 08:36 AM

That pickle really begs the question why, but I imagine it's on the same grounds as microwaving grapes correctly, MOAB and other such silly things. Because we can...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jun 06 - 11:44 PM

Tell him to get bent!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Jun 06 - 11:37 PM

This Goddamned website is getting way too personal! The last three or four times I've posted, the Google ads have been touting "English Grammar Checker" and "Grammar Lessons".

Hey, I have the requisite degree in English just like most of the other bozos around here. I think I know how to construct a readable paragraph. Okay, I don't do semicolons very well, but who outside the ranks of over-educated prigdom does? Hell, people have written novels without using a single semicolon!

Now, I wouldn't mind if Mr. Google flashed his ads at Bobert or The Shambles or any of our no-caps-no-punctuation-bite-me-if-you-don't-like-it crowd, but if he continues to criticize my writing he can take his little ads and put 'em where the sun don't shine!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jun 06 - 11:22 PM

It is something to light your evenings.

I saw Roy Acuff, I think it was, demonstrate this on television once.


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