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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 09 Jul 13 - 01:50 PM
Little Hawk 09 Jul 13 - 10:57 PM
Rapparee 10 Jul 13 - 01:55 AM
Little Hawk 10 Jul 13 - 09:54 AM
Rapparee 10 Jul 13 - 11:06 AM
Little Hawk 10 Jul 13 - 11:37 AM
Amos 10 Jul 13 - 11:52 AM
Rapparee 10 Jul 13 - 01:18 PM
Rapparee 10 Jul 13 - 01:56 PM
Rapparee 10 Jul 13 - 02:24 PM
Acme 10 Jul 13 - 03:28 PM
Amos 10 Jul 13 - 04:55 PM
Rapparee 10 Jul 13 - 09:15 PM
gnu 10 Jul 13 - 09:56 PM
Amos 11 Jul 13 - 08:04 AM
Little Hawk 11 Jul 13 - 09:31 AM
Rapparee 11 Jul 13 - 09:54 AM
Little Hawk 11 Jul 13 - 10:09 AM
Rapparee 11 Jul 13 - 01:23 PM
Little Hawk 11 Jul 13 - 01:33 PM
Rapparee 11 Jul 13 - 06:35 PM
Rapparee 11 Jul 13 - 11:05 PM
Acme 12 Jul 13 - 12:12 AM
Little Hawk 12 Jul 13 - 12:16 AM
Amos 12 Jul 13 - 02:02 AM
Rapparee 12 Jul 13 - 10:20 AM
Little Hawk 12 Jul 13 - 12:34 PM
Little Hawk 12 Jul 13 - 01:33 PM
Rapparee 12 Jul 13 - 01:35 PM
Little Hawk 12 Jul 13 - 02:04 PM
Amos 12 Jul 13 - 04:12 PM
Little Hawk 12 Jul 13 - 04:41 PM
Amos 12 Jul 13 - 06:43 PM
Amos 12 Jul 13 - 07:40 PM
Rapparee 13 Jul 13 - 09:36 AM
Acme 13 Jul 13 - 04:18 PM
Little Hawk 13 Jul 13 - 06:43 PM
Rapparee 13 Jul 13 - 10:41 PM
Little Hawk 13 Jul 13 - 11:34 PM
Amos 14 Jul 13 - 01:06 PM
Acme 14 Jul 13 - 01:34 PM
Little Hawk 14 Jul 13 - 01:50 PM
Rapparee 14 Jul 13 - 05:34 PM
Little Hawk 14 Jul 13 - 06:28 PM
Rapparee 14 Jul 13 - 09:49 PM
Acme 15 Jul 13 - 08:36 AM
MMario 15 Jul 13 - 08:45 AM
Amos 15 Jul 13 - 09:27 AM
Rapparee 15 Jul 13 - 09:42 AM
Rapparee 15 Jul 13 - 08:39 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Jul 13 - 01:50 PM

Didn't carry postcards, carried letters written on the finest, thinnest paper available. And it wasn't cheap, so it was pretty much limited to essential business matters and stuff like Lincoln's First Inaugural Address.

In the West, especially in California, it was called "the Pony." The riding ended in Sacramento (or St. Joe on the other end); from Sacramento the mochilla was carried to SF by steamboat.

Assuming, of course, that it got to either end. The Paiute War, blizzards, wildfires, dust storms and other things made the ride less than peaceful. Getting to your last station and finding the next rider sick, absent, or refusing to ride was annoying to say the least, because that meant you had to ride on. Finding the next station burned to the ground was also annoying, but oddly enough the riders of the COC&PPEC had one heckuva work ethic.

There were also express (mail) riders from one town to another.

Never, or very rareful, was money carried in any form other than what might be in the riders pockets. Dangerous and too heavy.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 Jul 13 - 10:57 PM

If only they'd had Chimps as riders! Chimps will work hard for just a few bananas a day. This could have made the vital difference.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jul 13 - 01:55 AM

Bananas weren't imported then. Like the chimps, they'd rot in shipment.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Jul 13 - 09:54 AM

You telling me that Jesse James never had the chance to eat a banana? That's tragic. No wonder he turned to a life of crime.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jul 13 - 11:06 AM

Yup, ol' Dingus never tasted a banana. Neither did a lot of them Olde Weste gunne menne. Yes, that could be a reason why they turned to crime and outlawry. Imagine what would be the effect if the Clantons and Lawreys had been able to sit down and enjoy banana splits with the Earps and Doc Holliday at the OK Soda Fountain! Or Owen Wister's Virginian saying, "Smile when you offer me a banana."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Jul 13 - 11:37 AM

LOL!!! Yeah, I can soooo picture that. ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Jul 13 - 11:52 AM

I respect your precision, Sir Booque, even as I thumb my nose at your intensity of focus. I knew you were going to call out the reference to postcards. But I left it there, glowing in the moonlight like a radioactive mackerel, because it was so much semantically superior to the more precise "letters". The word "postcards" carries overtones of the time-honored post, and resonates with the other meanings of "post", including horsemanship, and at the same time reflects on the flimsiness of dreams such as those invoked to assert the reality of the Pony, a house of cards both economically and in terms of modern fancies. For all these reasons, I left it in, and for one reason only, you called it out. And I knew you would do so. But for all these reasons, I left it in.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jul 13 - 01:18 PM

Amos, we're talking about bananas in the Olde Weste now. I know that you're old and it's getting hard to understand that the world is changing around you much more quickly than you would like. If you can't keep up with the bananas, Nang Tani may getcha.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jul 13 - 01:56 PM

By the way, would PM me your address?

Danke. Tak. Gracias. Obrigato.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jul 13 - 02:24 PM

Amos, that is to say. Please PM me your address.

Merci.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 10 Jul 13 - 03:28 PM

You can't google him and find out everything, right down to the flowers in his front yard and the color roof on the house? Yup. It's in there.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Jul 13 - 04:55 PM

I have PMd you my own address, Sir Booque. I am also pleased to report that my GoogleMaps picture is fairly recent!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jul 13 - 09:15 PM

Poo. I can find stuff on anybody, prit near. And because I know how to do this I know that others can as well, so I actually live in a cave and post stuff on the World Wide Web using my psychotropopathetic powers, Rest assured, I only use them for The Good, usually.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 10 Jul 13 - 09:56 PM

Wait a minute!!! Whaddya mean yer gonna post the book as soon as ya get the coin? WTF is that shit? Ya think I would say I sent it but didn't? $20??? A measly $20? I feel more than slightly slighted. Who do you take me for, sir? When have ever been not a man of his word?

And, Sally doesn't count. I was only 15. Ooooh dear Sally. She was such a good bad girl. She used to flirt with me and say her hands were cold and put them in my pockets to warm them... she warmed my... ahem... heart.

So... yer Jackson is on a horse eh, A. If the horse dies during interrogation at the border, I guess I'll never get to read your book.

Ya know. This is kinda funny. I changed a USD 50 inta a 20 and 2 x 10 and 5 fer ta get that 20 I sent ya what I got from this redneck hick in a town called Pocotellyah er sumpin like that on a similar book deal. Course, I didn't sign it on accounta tweren't my book.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Jul 13 - 08:04 AM

My order of books should arrive tonight, and yours will go out Friday. I am not waiting on Jackson's horse, sir. Just inventory.,


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jul 13 - 09:31 AM

Amos, I may buy another copy of your book to give to a friend. How do you prefer I do the purchase? Amazon? Direct from you? Tell me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jul 13 - 09:54 AM

I'll be sendin' ya a double sawbuck fer than "book" ya writ.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jul 13 - 10:09 AM

Send him an old $20 St Gauden's Double Eagle instead. I'm sure he'd be happy with that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jul 13 - 01:23 PM

Nah, I got a twenty where a picher of Lincoln is printed upside down. He's sucker enough to take it -- I got it from ma mother in law, who got it from her momma who worked at the Bureau of Engraving and Printing in the "rejects" room.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jul 13 - 01:33 PM

I bet you don't have the one where his eyes are crossed and his tongue is hanging out. I was lucky...snagged it at a Thrift store in Espanola...they had no idea of its worth. One day I'll sell it on Ebay and retire, buy a yacht, and finally secure that long-delayed date with Winona.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jul 13 - 06:35 PM

Well when you turn it right-up you can see Lincoln is holding a banana.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jul 13 - 11:05 PM

I went to a meeting this evening and learned something a bit...odd? frightening?

Some history: the Pocatello airport can last 747s -- it was a bomber training base in WW2. Off in the desert north of here it is said that there are still unexploded bombs, dropped by the trainees. The Navy also used the area to test 5" anti-aircraft cannon. Other things were done in other places around here.

About a week and half ago a fire broke out in Bureau of Land Management lands near 2 1/2 Mile Road (it was called, oddly enough, "The Two and Half Mile Road Fire"). A little over a thousand acres burned.

UNREPORTED in/on the news was that some of the fire fighters found two somethings that looked like a football attached to a length of pipe. Two more were found in a nearby gully; the fire had NOT burned over them.

As they were described, as above, I said, "Panzerfaust." Apparently at least four of them were brought to Pocatello and shot in the hills east of I-15 "back in the day."

Anyway, the military was called in. The four were bundled together, some C-4 was wrapped around them, and they were exploded about 70 years after they were made.

Ya wanna take a hike in the hills around here? Never know what you might stumble across.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Jul 13 - 12:12 AM

LH, if you buy it through Amazon, click on the link at Mudcat so Max gets a little of the action.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jul 13 - 12:16 AM

Will do. Thanks for the tip.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jul 13 - 02:02 AM

That'll do, LH! Unless there's a delivery blockage to Canada. I haven't seen my delivery yet, either!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jul 13 - 10:20 AM

A good high colonic could clear the blockage. We could stick the nozzle in a Certain Person in Blind River.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jul 13 - 12:34 PM

Trust me. You don't want to do that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jul 13 - 01:33 PM

Anyway, there's no delivery blockage to Canada. This country has a healthy respect for money. ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jul 13 - 01:35 PM

But think of the blockages that would be removed!

Wait, the waste water treatment plant would overflow and wash into the Great Lakes, filling them to overflowing, flooding both Canada and the US with, um, stuff. And it couldn't ever be stopped up again!

Well, it seemed like a good solution.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jul 13 - 02:04 PM

There is no solution where Shane is concerned.

By the way, he's already working on an outline for his second book, even though the first one is barely started. The 2nd book will be called: "Flipped If I Know....?"

It will take on some of the great unanswered questions of life, like...

Is it safe to eat pizza after it's been layin' for 3 days behind the couch?

Skunky, left-over beer...can you still get drunk on it?

Can you plead insanity to get off a breaking and entering charge?

Do you need an education to think? Or is that a false myth that is spread by the govnerment and the teechers to, like, provide enployment?

How do you calm donw a flippin' angry woman and get her in "the mood"???

Etc.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jul 13 - 04:12 PM

A box of BOOKS has arriveds at last. Gnu's will be going out this afternoon. I put in a 17-hour day yesterday, drove to LA, was up at 4:30 and crashed home at last at about 10:30. Whoof!

I wish more people were buying Beyond the Cascade, honest I do. :D


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jul 13 - 04:41 PM

Ah, good. Again, I ask, should I buy from you directly? Or from Amazon?

Meanwhile, I'm about 90% through the copy I already have. Terrific. And I really worry about what may happen to Suzannah and Muhaybee. This shows how well you have written about your characters, that the reader starts to care a great deal about them. That's one of the keys to great writing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jul 13 - 06:43 PM

Thanks for your kind remarks. If you want it inscribed you have to send me the dough. If that is not of great importance to you, order it through Amazon.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jul 13 - 07:40 PM

Gnu,

Your Inscribed Edytione has been entrusted to the Poste Orifice.

I don't know how long it takes, but the envelope you sent on the 4th arrived here today.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jul 13 - 09:36 AM

Ah'm a-headin' fer a showdown taday. Gotta have it out with them dust-lickin', sheep-raisin', cattle rustlin' McBrides. They're dumber'n boiled gravel, but even so there's gonna be a showdown, iffen they can remember which end of their guns to point away from themselves. Last time the kid one, I think his name is Sham, tried to saddle a horse he kept puttin' the girth on top and kept screamin' how he kept fallin' off. 'Course, when he'd fall off his horse would take two steps forward and dump on the pile. He didn't like the name we give him, "The Horsepoopy Kid" (from his sayin', "How come this horse always poopys on me?"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Jul 13 - 04:18 PM

Looks like everyone is in the shady afternoon hammock reading Amos's book - no one is checking on MOM.

I refilled her iced tea glass. She's not interested in anyone's gourmet goodies right now - says it's too damned hot to eat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Jul 13 - 06:43 PM

Hmm. An inscribed version would be nice. PM me with instructions, Amos. ;-)

Rap - I'm surprised you have the temerity to issue this sort of reckless challenge to the McBride clan. Very surprised. You have clearly either become unhinged...lost your marbles...or fallen into a darkly suicidal mood. The McBrides caused so much trouble in Ireland that people there still cross themselves at the mention of the name "McBride"...specially in the region around the town of Dangle. They were finally driven out and re-settled in North America, causing further havoc and distress everywhere they went. You think the Donnelys were feared? Ha! Nothing next to the McBrides.

Tell me where to send the flowers for your next of kin.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jul 13 - 10:41 PM

Yeah, well, some of 'em settled around here -- up around Slough Creek, to be exact. No place else would take 'em due to their fondness for suid intimacy (to put it politely an' ta teach ya a new word). Anyway, they've been movin' in around here, leavin' their ancestral wallow. So we had ta shoot 'em. Dumped the bodies in an old, closed, dump because no place wanted 'em due to the massive amounts EPA paperwork dealing with the disposal of extremely toxic waste.

It was that suid intimacy thing that got 'em tossed out of Ireland, too. People still cross themselves and say, "Go ndéana an diabhal dréimire de cnámh do dhroma ag piocadh úll i ngairdín Ifrinn, Mac Brihd. Má ithis, nar chacair! Imeacht gan teacht ort."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Jul 13 - 11:34 PM

Oh, I see. Some McBrides were living in your area, eh? Well, you've probably done the best thing, given what usually happens when they are around a place for very long.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Jul 13 - 01:06 PM

WEll, I dont have much truck with them since back when my cousin Arthur and I had the run in with the sergeant. But even McBrides are welcome to buy Beyond the Cascade. It's not a book for a few! It's a book for at least ten per cent of the population.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Jul 13 - 01:34 PM

They might use it to impress visitors to their home. Like a coffee table book without pictures.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Jul 13 - 01:50 PM

LOL!!! No...you use those huge photospread books and trashy novels by people like Danielle Steele to do that, Stilly. Or you leave copies of serious tomes like "Atlas Shrugged" and "The Fountainhead" lying around here and there in obvious sight. (cough! cough!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jul 13 - 05:34 PM

McBrides don't use tables -- just swill troughs.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Jul 13 - 06:28 PM

Shane generally uses the couch or the front porch for eating. When pizza or other stuff falls behind the couch, he hunts it out a day or so later, picks the dust bunnies off, and tries to decide whether it's still a good idea to eat it or not.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jul 13 - 09:49 PM

Sham McBride has been know to eat what the rats leave behind in the dumpster. He eats his boogers off his fingers, but he does use a seasoned salt he collects from the roads during the winter.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Jul 13 - 08:36 AM

Ewww, Rap, I was just taking a sip of tea when I read that! Nearly had to spit it out!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 15 Jul 13 - 08:45 AM

Hi MOM! I've started commuting to 1585 every weekend so things are a bit hectic....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jul 13 - 09:27 AM

Dear Manne of Emms,

What a pleasure to see you back in Mom's depleted halls.

But, sirrah, you have to do some 'splaining.

How do you commute to a number? Or is it MOAB you refer to--that 1585 is an awful long way upthread. Hope the commute is worth it.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jul 13 - 09:42 AM

AND it was a terrible year! Surely you don't celebrate the Treaty of Nonsuch, or the death of Henry Percy.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jul 13 - 08:39 PM

Mom! Stop hanging around with the likes of "Egypt." That's not Little Egypt, who you know from your younger days.


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