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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rustic Rebel 08 Oct 04 - 02:26 AM
Peace 08 Oct 04 - 02:41 AM
Tweed 08 Oct 04 - 08:33 AM
GUEST,MMario 08 Oct 04 - 09:34 AM
khandu 08 Oct 04 - 10:54 PM
Rustic Rebel 09 Oct 04 - 03:11 AM
MMario 09 Oct 04 - 08:15 AM
GUEST,New York Rapaire 09 Oct 04 - 08:37 AM
khandu 09 Oct 04 - 12:47 PM
CarolC 09 Oct 04 - 01:36 PM
GUEST,Stilly River Sage 09 Oct 04 - 01:41 PM
Rustic Rebel 09 Oct 04 - 07:05 PM
Rustic Rebel 10 Oct 04 - 03:20 AM
Rapparee 10 Oct 04 - 04:23 PM
Rapparee 11 Oct 04 - 01:49 PM
CarolC 11 Oct 04 - 08:16 PM
Rapparee 11 Oct 04 - 08:52 PM
Rustic Rebel 11 Oct 04 - 10:26 PM
Amos 11 Oct 04 - 10:58 PM
Acme 12 Oct 04 - 05:58 PM
Rapparee 12 Oct 04 - 09:59 PM
Acme 12 Oct 04 - 10:23 PM
Little Hawk 12 Oct 04 - 10:29 PM
Amos 12 Oct 04 - 10:48 PM
Little Hawk 12 Oct 04 - 10:58 PM
Amos 12 Oct 04 - 11:11 PM
Little Hawk 12 Oct 04 - 11:20 PM
Rapparee 13 Oct 04 - 09:22 AM
GUEST 13 Oct 04 - 09:32 AM
Rapparee 13 Oct 04 - 09:40 AM
Tweed 13 Oct 04 - 10:09 AM
Amos 13 Oct 04 - 10:20 AM
Acme 13 Oct 04 - 11:04 AM
Amos 13 Oct 04 - 12:53 PM
Rapparee 13 Oct 04 - 03:21 PM
GUEST,MMario 13 Oct 04 - 03:29 PM
Rapparee 13 Oct 04 - 05:57 PM
Amos 13 Oct 04 - 06:42 PM
Little Hawk 13 Oct 04 - 07:16 PM
Amos 13 Oct 04 - 08:41 PM
Little Hawk 13 Oct 04 - 08:54 PM
Rapparee 13 Oct 04 - 09:18 PM
Acme 13 Oct 04 - 10:32 PM
Rapparee 13 Oct 04 - 10:34 PM
Little Hawk 14 Oct 04 - 12:09 AM
Rustic Rebel 14 Oct 04 - 01:58 AM
Rapparee 14 Oct 04 - 08:33 AM
Amos 14 Oct 04 - 08:56 AM
Rapparee 14 Oct 04 - 09:09 AM
polaitaly 14 Oct 04 - 04:30 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 08 Oct 04 - 02:26 AM

Tweedandonlytweednottobeconfusedwithkandu,
I want only you, Tweedandonlytweednottobecofusedwithkandu, to read this message, the rest of MOABS please pass by...
Tweedonlytweednottobeconfusedwithkandu, how the hell did you know I was naked tonight?
To assume you know what I'm up to, is for me to assume you have planted a hidden camera in my room where I run naked and play.
Tweedandonlytweednottobeconfusedwithkandu, you are now under suspicion.

P.S. Do you notice that I like to rub my mouse when I sit here in my little room in the upstairs from the downstair room?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Peace
Date: 08 Oct 04 - 02:41 AM

Rustic Rebel's post just above was post 4801. That's a prime number. Very cool.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 08 Oct 04 - 08:33 AM

I yam allus under suspender Rucstic so thet iz not news to me ennyhow. I know you wabz nekkid because you ar allus nekkid, but tell me (and only me,) does yore mouse squeak when you ar rubbin on thet thing?

I got to go jump in the branch now, its gettin' a little warm in here! HoooHaw....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 08 Oct 04 - 09:34 AM

hey Carol! Happy early Anniversary! You and JackTheSailor seem to have started a trend of getting married and going to Getaway!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: khandu
Date: 08 Oct 04 - 10:54 PM

Haw! Ob Corze thair iz a camry planted in yore room! Ah iz prowd to say, yew shore got one purty mouse thair, Mz RR! AH aslo sees thet yore cute liddle mouse is nekkid too! Whut a loverly pare yew make!

khadnuwhoizmesometimesandhimtherest


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 09 Oct 04 - 03:11 AM

Alright then.
Now that all has been established that the mouse has fur like a pussy...
I would like to take you all on a ride down to,
'Make up a freaky, funky, get down, pass it around, don't make no sense, or maybe it will, jive ass talking, arthritically walkin'story of the times.
I'm setting the stage and the title.
The title.

The Birthmark

The jest of the jive..(the stage)

Birthmarks have appeared.
The signs.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 09 Oct 04 - 08:15 AM

say WHAT?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,New York Rapaire
Date: 09 Oct 04 - 08:37 AM

They are holding me captive in New York City. Please send help. They are plotting to take over and think that I can help them. Please please please send help.

Thank you.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: khandu
Date: 09 Oct 04 - 12:47 PM

When I get the promised cheque, I will send help!

Tweedwhoisnothimtoday


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 09 Oct 04 - 01:36 PM

Thanks MMario!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Stilly River Sage
Date: 09 Oct 04 - 01:41 PM

Still in Seattle, kinda moist, but nice. Preen over a little 4800 if you will, but I still have dibs on number 5000! Just ask Amos, he'll remind you!

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 09 Oct 04 - 07:05 PM

I agree MMario. What? Can we forget that last post I posted?
Moving on...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 10 Oct 04 - 03:20 AM

I retract that last post.


I could tell from the birthmark around his left eye that he was the known type that walked with a limp and I was just going to pass by without a hello.
I had to get over to MMario's place before midnight to bring him his daily dose of nostrum, and I was running and panting, earlier that day.
It was unusual to see this type of birthmarked person in our sphere and I had to wonder what shehe was about..


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Oct 04 - 04:23 PM

I have returned. Though the path was fraught with danger and terror, though my cell phone got screwed up and and my watchband broke, I escaped.   I managed to return to Idaho, even. So here I am, birthmark and all. But that's okay, because I'm going to have the birthmark removed or at least altered. I mean, when I was growing up it was pretty cool to have Elvis's face on my, ah, derriere but nowadays if I drop trou to show someone they get all hostile. Maybe I'll have it altered to look like someone else, like a map of France or Never-never Land or a horse or something.

Yes, I talk like that all the time or at least some of the time.

Thank you for taking care of Mom.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Oct 04 - 01:49 PM

Poor Mother. Here, have some refreshment.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 11 Oct 04 - 08:16 PM

...and what better refreshment than KETCHUP?

W Ketchup

You don't support Democrats.

Why should your ketchup?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Oct 04 - 08:52 PM

Away, away with H, by heck
H by heck
H by heck
Away, away with H, by heck
The song of the W Ketchup!

We never eat hot dogs, we think they're a crime
We'll always oppose them in song and in rhyme
We can't approve weiners, too liberal are they
Who pour on the ketchup beginning with "Hei"!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 11 Oct 04 - 10:26 PM

I dance through the colors of the forest
leaves falling and I stand calling...
Who there?
Who wasn't it for, to be there?
Who was loving the day before I did?
Walk out of this lost forest, before it loses me.

I ran through thoughts of color today
Naked, all but my socks on.
Colors were the inspiring thoughts,
this day, with whiskey in my gut
and if I had the ability to have a hard on,
it would have to be a colored, purple with a red fringe, clitoris climax.
Take it as it is...
Take it for who I am....
Take it or don't....
Choice is the ultimate word, after all.


Birthmarked at the beginning, was a horrific experience. She walked throughout the night trying to hide her purple, with a red fringe birthmark. To her it resembled a republican, to anyone else it resembled a clitoris climax. If she was a smart one she would choose the later.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Oct 04 - 10:58 PM

Even Ketchup stands aside for genius. Especially when mother is watching.

Sing on, RR! :)


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Oct 04 - 05:58 PM

I'm back from Seattle. Considerably loaded down with stuff people said I had to take back with me. I went with two bags (a backpack and a small rolling pack) and came back with the backpack, a rolling duffle, and a big box. The cats were glad to see me, the garden was glad to see me. Now I'm off to pick up the kids and run by the store to pick up a rotisserie chicken, 'cause I aint cookin' tonight!

Back to your regular BS.

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Oct 04 - 09:59 PM

Wadjabringme???


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Oct 04 - 10:23 PM

Yeah, I heard that alright! They didn't believe me when I said "nothing." So I gave them each a t-shirt. . . for now. :) Holidays are coming soon!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Oct 04 - 10:29 PM

Amos, how do you justify your continuing sycophantic loyalty to this thread which has long since passed its prime, veered then hideously into its dotage, expired as a creative work of any useful sort, and is now pushing up pointless artistic daisies out of the layer of fresh dung that is daily deposited upon it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Oct 04 - 10:48 PM

Because, at least it calls on the creative powers of a small number without exposing them to the detritus of the professionally mediocre or the maliciously inept.

Your heros McG and Julia and Shat, on the other hand, are chosen members of the small glittering band of loyal brothers committed to the lowering of standards wherever they may be found.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Oct 04 - 10:58 PM

God, you have a marvelous way with words. Okay...give me your honest opinion of Bill Clinton and Hillary Clinton, then. How do you rate them on the human scale?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Oct 04 - 11:11 PM

I do not.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Oct 04 - 11:20 PM

Ah. Smart move. I find them both quite interesting. More so than either Bush or Kerry, that's for sure.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 09:22 AM

For shame on both of you! Rating people as if they were some sort of test item in Consumers Reports! Just because those who have strayed from such Ways Of Rightousness as pimping their grandmothers or selling bad dope to kindergarteners and into Politics are syncophatic, lickspittle, brown nosing, gutless, incoherent, aliterate, cowardly, calamitous, declassee, purchased, disgusting, lying, mudsucking, pathetic, and pitiable excuses for humanity; just because their amorphous behaviors cozen up to greed or worse, is ABSOLUTELY no excuse to "rate" them! They are someone's sons and daughters, even if their parents long ago forsook them for someone more human, like a serial child abuser. For shame, the both of ya! Rating people like they were things! How would YOU like it, I ask you?

The very idea! Rating people!

Hmph!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 09:32 AM

seven point six


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 09:40 AM

Instead of rating people, why don't you find the superperson within you?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 10:09 AM

LIDDLEHARG!! You are back in the fold I see and could not stay away forever could you? MOAB is all ensnaring and encomposting and you certingly ar a part obv the heap. Admit it, yore drawn inexorably to it like a Canadian blowfly that hovers around a bucket obv fishguts. Yaz, Amos is a genus with words. I don't allus know what the hell he is saying but they read real good. But tell us while we habv you in ar grasp agin, how do you really rate Willam Shatzer? Iz he up thar az far as Hilary? She iz a peach ain't she?

I wabz lookin' for something the other day and just happened acorss this song which some fan (mebbe it was you) wrote in honor obv Willam Shatler. I am in compete convulsions wif you Harg, thar iz no greater lesbeen on stage nor screed. Anyhow, here iz the song, which I am certain I habv heard somewhar before but cannot say warh.

I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK


I sleep all night and I work all day.

Chorus:
O Shat's a lumberjack and he's OK
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

I cut down trees, I eat my lunch
I go to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays I go shopping and have buttered scones for tea

Mounties:
He cut down trees, he eat his lunch
He go to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays he go shopping and has buttered scones for tea.

Chorus:
Bill's a lumberjack and he's OK
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

I cut down trees, I skip and jump
I like to press wild flowers.
I put on women's clothing and hang around in bars.

Mounties:
He cuts down trees, he skips and jumps
He likes to press wild flowers.
He puts on women's clothing and hangs around in bars.

Chorus:
He's a lumberjack and he's OK
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

I cut down trees, I wear high heels
Suspendies and a bra.
I wish I'd been a girlie, just like my dear pappa.

Mounties:
He cuts down trees, he wears high heels?
Suspendies...and a bra?

...He's a lumberjack and he's OK
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

...He's/I'm a lumberjack and he's/I'm OK
He/I sleep all night and he/I work all day.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 10:20 AM

Jesus, Rapaire --

I mean, I love all your adjectives and all, but what part of the phrase "I do not" did you miss?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 11:04 AM

Okay, now something in the memory has stirred. What is the real set of words to that Lumberjack song? I can't place it yet, where I've heard it. It will bug me all day long.

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 12:53 PM

Lumberjack Song
By Monty Python

I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK,
I sleep all night and I work all day.

He's a lumberjack and he's OK,
He sleeps all night and works all day.

I cut down trees, I eat my lunch,
I go to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays I go shopping,
And have buttered scones for tea.

I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK,
I sleep all night and I work all day.

He's a lumberjack and he's OK,
He sleeps all night and works all day.

He cuts down trees, eats his lunch,
Goes to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays he goes shopping,
And has buttered scones for tea.

I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK,
I sleep all night and I work all day.

He's a lumberjack and he's OK,
He sleeps all night and works all day.

I cut down trees, I skip and jump,
I like to press wild flowers,
I put on women's clothing,
And hang around in bars.

He cuts down trees, he skips and jumps,
He likes to press wild flowers,
He put on women's clothing,
And hang around in bars.

I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK,
I sleep all night and I work all day.

He's a lumberjack and he's OK,
He sleeps all night and works all day.

I cut down trees, I wear high heels,
Suspenders and a bra,
I wish I were a girlie,
Just like my dear papa.

He cuts down trees, he wears high heels,
Suspenders and a bra,
He wants to be a girlie,
Just like his dear papa????

I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK,
I sleep all night and I work all day.

He's a lumberjack and he's OK,
He sleeps all night and works all day.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 03:21 PM

Obviously, if you do not rate them on the human scale, you must rate them on an inhuman or subhuman scale. Those who ask others to "rate" people and those who do the "rating" are a disgrace, an embarrassment, a blot, a vertitable stigma that humiliates and dishonors their humanity. Their actions are scandalous, flagrant obscenities anathema to those who in all other respects might be quite admirable.

(On a happier note, I've found my thesaurus!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 03:29 PM

if you do not rate them on the human scale, you must rate them on an inhuman or subhuman scale

unless

a) he doesn't rate them at all. (as he stated)

b) he rates them on a super-human scale.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 05:57 PM

Nah, not Amos.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 06:42 PM

Rapaire is being awfully judgmental about judges, is he not? Doth he protest overmuch? How now doth his brown cow enow?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 07:16 PM

I came back here because Amos has been attacking me in a strident and unconscionable manner on a variety of other threads that he deems to be beneath his contempt, and I had to respond.

How do I rate William Shatner? Ummm...I give him a solid 8 out of 10, I guess. He's got his good points. He can't sing, but he's good at a number of other things. He has added to our lives considerably in his own inimitable fashion.

Bill and Hillary rate quite high on the political entertainment scale...I give Bill a 9.5!!! I give Hillary an 8.5, which is still really good. If she gets to be president (unlikely) I bet she could push it to 9.5 in no time.

Bush I give a 4.5, by the way. Kerry? Hard to say. Maybe a 6.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 08:41 PM

LH:

I wasn't attacking you.

I was defending America. Our values. Our Freedom!

It only looked like an attack to you because you are an outsider.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 08:54 PM

Ri-i-i-i-ght! Man, you oughta get appointed to Bush's emergency response anti-terrorism team or the Senate Foreign Relations Committee or something.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 09:18 PM

I want to get on the Un-American Activities Committee! I've got a whole bunch of stuff I'd like to do that I've been told is downright unAmerican.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 10:32 PM

157 to go to 5000.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Oct 04 - 10:34 PM

I've said it before: numbers mean nothing in and of themselves. Your next post can be 5000 if you want it to be. This, for instance, is post 10,000.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Oct 04 - 12:09 AM

And I'm taking post 20,000 right now.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 14 Oct 04 - 01:58 AM

The song was done right the first time by Tweed
(and whoeverhethinksheisonthesidebutweallknowwhoheisanyway)
Fuck political bullshit Hawk, It will all be alright. Just take a deep breath....Ahhh...
Welcome back Rapaire, Amos, Little Hawk, Stilly, Nigal, Blaster Billy, Kokamo Bill, Jimmy the jumper, Georgeous Greg, Sally the Stampede, and Phillip the funk.
Knowing you all is loving you all. It does not matter that I don't really know any of you. It doesn't matter that I feel like I know half of you folks. You have been outcast or shunned, just because you have a birthmark on your inner left thigh. It doesn't matter to any termagant anyway.
I still hold fast to believing you are what ever you are.
I'm not holding it against anyone who will come forth and admit that the birthmark is the right of birth and the mark of the mother.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Oct 04 - 08:33 AM

But my mother rejected me! Threw me out of the house and took back what she gave me: the lawn chair, the overalls, the beach ball, both pairs of undies, my navel, forty-seven cents spending money, the keys to the '37 Chevy coupe, the ticket stub to the 1947 World Series, eight popcorn hulls, both my Elvis and my Buddy Holly birthmarks, half my chromosones, toilet training, and my name. I will never forget how, with tears running down her withered and care-worn cheeks, she said "And don't come back!" as she set the dogs on me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Oct 04 - 08:56 AM

Never mind, Rapaire. This thread will be your Mother and everything will be all right.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Oct 04 - 09:09 AM

Halluja...Halleyou...Gloryosky! My navel has retuned! Say "Amen"! Now I have a place to keep the lint!


OOOOOOOooooooooooooooh MOAB! Thankyouthankyouthankyou. I would sacrifice my first born, if I had kids, so I'll find someone else's firstborn and dedicate that to you.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: polaitaly
Date: 14 Oct 04 - 04:30 PM

Rapaire, was your mother singing " Hit the road, Jack, and dont't come back no more, no more no more no more...!" ?


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