help: british comic monologuist

Subject: help: british comic monologuist
From: GUEST,Jim
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 06:17 PM

There is/was a British comic monologuist, Unley Owen, Stanley Unley, somwething like that. He had a very funny monologue about being on building site with ropes and barrels going up and down, you get the jist if you know the piece I'm referring to. I want to track down a transcript of that particular monologue if it is available.
Thanks
Jim

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: GUEST,Hootenanny
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 06:22 PM

The man that you are looking for is Gerrard Hoffnung, not only a brilliantt raconteur but musician and cartoonist too. Sadly no longer with us I believe that all his work is available on CD. Highly reccommended.

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: Fliss
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 06:41 PM

the sick note/ murphy and the bricks

try doing a search for the above in the Lyrics & knowledge search. Lot of info on this thread.

Its Professor Stanley Unwin you were thinking of - and he talked his own techincal language. Oh joy of the fundimolde.

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: Susanne (skw)
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 06:53 PM

Try this thread. It or one of those under 'Related threads' should contain Hoffnung's address.

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: GUEST, Mikefule
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 06:58 PM

The barrel of bricks sketch is a standard gag which appears in a number of songs, monologues and film sequences.

I think you're talking about the bloke who speaks with a posh accent an uses the immortal phrase (half way though the story) "Around this time, I must have lost my presence of mind, because I let go of the rope..." That's definitely not Hoffnung.

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: harvey andrews
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 07:33 PM

It is Hoffnung. I have the LP.

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: MartinRyan
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 08:10 PM

Didn't unwin speak backwards, aila retni?

Regards

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: Leadfingers
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 08:17 PM

Stanley Unwin had his own way of saying things - The Barrel of Bricks
was first recorded by Gerard Hoffnung (Oxford Union Address 1952 I think ) then turned into a song !
I remember S U doing adverts for Flowers beer ! For the best picket in a brewflade Flowers Brewmaster !

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: MartinRyan
Date: 18 Dec 04 - 08:17 PM

Stanley Unwin Explained.

Regards

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: GUEST, Mikefule
Date: 19 Dec 04 - 06:48 AM

Just to clarify: when I wrote, "It's definitely not him" (Hoffnung) what I meant to say was, "It's definitely Hoffnung - Harvey Andrews has the LP to prove it."

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 19 Dec 04 - 07:24 AM

Then of course there's Stanley Holloway, Albert and the Lion, Battle of Hastings, etc.
Giok

Subject: Lyr Add: WHY PADDY'S NOT AT WORK TODAY^^^
From: 12string growler
Date: 19 Dec 04 - 11:34 AM

Dear Sir I write this note to you, to tell you of me plight.
For at this time of writing, I am not a pretty sight.
Me body is all black and blue, me face a deathly grey.
So I write this note to say, why Paddy's not at work today.

While working on the 14th floor, some bricks I had to clear
Now to throw them down from such a height was not a good idea
The Foreman wasn't very pleased, he being an awkward sod
He said I'd have to cart em down the ladder in me hod.

Now clearing all these bricks by hand, it was so very slow
So I hoisted up a barrow (Barrel), and secured the rope below
But in me haste to do the job, I was too blind to see,
That a barrow full of building bricks, was heavier than me

So, when I untied the rope, the barrow fell like lead
and clinging tightly to the rope, I started up instead
Well I shot up like a rocket, till to my dismay I found, that
Half-way up I met the bloody barrow coming down

Well the barrow broke me shoulder, as to the ground it sped
and when I reached the top I banged the pulley with me head.
Well I clung on tight thoug numb with shock from this almighty blow
and the barrow spilled out half the bricks some fourteen floors below

Now when these bricks had fallen from the barrow to the floor,
I then out-weighed the barrow, and so started down once more.
Still clinging tightly to the rope, I sped towards the ground
and landed on the broken bricks, that were scattered all around

Well I lay there groaning on the ground, I thought I'd past the worst
When the barrow hit the pulley wheel, and then the bottom burst.
Wll a shower of bricks rained down on me, I hadn't got a hope
as I lay there groaning on the ground, I let go the bloody rope

The barrow then being heavier, it started down once more,
and landed right across me as I lay upon the floor.
I broke three ribs and my right arm, and I can only say
that I hope you'll understand why Paddy's not at work today.


There you go, I hope that helps. I have it credited to a chap called Pat Cooksey

12String Growler

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: alanabit
Date: 19 Dec 04 - 02:44 PM

Thanks Growler, but that song, by Mudcat's own Pat Cooksey, has already been the subject of several threads here. Gerald Hoffnung,as he has acknowledged here, did the original sketch, which he turned into a song.

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: wildlone
Date: 19 Dec 04 - 04:36 PM

For "Words - Lyrics to 100's of
HUMOROUS POEMS AND COMEDY MONOLOGUES:
Marriott Edgar, Stanley Holloway, George Robey and many, many more..." http://www.monologues.co.uk/index.htm
dave

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: GUEST, Mikefule
Date: 19 Dec 04 - 05:27 PM

Alanabit wrote: "Gerald Hoffnung,as he has acknowledged here, did the original sketch".

The original? I think you'll find that on the wall of the antechamber of the Great Pyramid of Cheops is a version of this story in hieroglyphs. Also, there's a version in early Oggam script scratched into the lintel of the entrance to Maes Howe in Orkney.

However, for the earliest known version of this story, I draw your attention to the book of Genesis in the King Jim Bible* which starts, "And lo! Eve sayeth unto Adam, 'In the tree there are many apples and I would eat them. Fetcheth a rope and bucket and thou canst pick them and lower them safely to the ground without thou bruiseth them', and Adam sayeth unto her, 'Give it a rest,' but she persisteth, and Adam saw that he would no peace have until he picketh the apples..."

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: MartinRyan
Date: 19 Dec 04 - 06:16 PM

Maes Howe! That brings back a memory....

A few years ago (1999?) I sailed on a Norwegian barque "Staadsrad Lehmkuhl" from the Clyde to Shetland. Along the way,we called at Stromness on Orkney - at the request of the Norwegian consul on the island, which I thought a nice touch. Anyway, we arrived about 10 a.m. and were due to stay until next morning. I went on a tear, as we say in Ireland! I drank steadily all day, with occasional breaks for food. At one stage we were taken on a bus tour to, amongst other historical places, - Maes Howe! I found it hard to tell the standing stones from inclined planes!

Next morning, I'm sitting bleary-eyed at breakfast across the table from a Scot of about my own vintage with whom I had bcome friendly. " I saw ye a few times yesterday", sez he " but I was too busy drinking to stop to chat! I think I drank in every place in Stromness you can get a drink in - except the British Legion (club) - they wouldn't let me in!". "There you are!" sez I, " They let me in - it was the last drink of the night for me!"

Just to establish a musical connection: while I was still relatively sober, I had visited the house Lady Jane Franklin had stayed in at one stage when the hunt for her husband was being organised. As we sailed out the next morning, I sat on deck singing "Lady Franklin's Lament" and followed it with Stan Rogers' "Northwest Passage".

Regards

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: GUEST,Bob Cooper: In Sunny Australia.
Date: 31 Mar 09 - 02:37 PM

Maes Howe, brings back a tear, my old army mate came from the islan
-d of Shapinsay, I did my turn of Stanley Unwin Albert and the Lion, followed by Milton B Hayes' The One Eyed Yellow Idol. Performing in the islands when your a guest of a 'Local' gets your card marked. I was taken to all the historical (hysterical)) sites.
Places like Skara Brae the pre-historic village, The Broachs, all this in a life of fun and laughter, just from liking monologues.Orkney and Shetland are places to see for the unique way of life. I've got a few monologues that I have written, at 66 I still get a laugh from the Professor....

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: Newport Boy
Date: 31 Mar 09 - 04:42 PM

Just back to Stanley Unwin, briefly. He used wonderful nonsense words, which somehow you understood. My favourite was a phrase from an advert for Flowers Keg Bitter - remember that?

"Flowers - the true picket of the blueflade"

We all knew he meant the flavour of the hops.

Phil

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: Alan Day
Date: 31 Mar 09 - 05:58 PM

Many years ago whilst on a Morris Tour a person gave us a large number of Musical Monologues,mostly Late Victorian early Edwardian. Some are hilarious,some morbid, usually with a moral,some very unusual. Jim Farr (Jim the Poet)and I used to perform some of these with Jim doing the dialogue and me providing the music on concertina. One in particular was Waif's Paradise about children going on Holiday from the poor areas of London into the country and their descriptions of what they saw.The Charity that ran this Yearly trip was still operating about ten years ago and they used this monologue when it was first written to raise money for their charity. It is a very moving piece and normally caused a few tears in the audience.I would be interested if anyone has any of these old monologues.
Al

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: Tim Leaning
Date: 31 Mar 09 - 07:02 PM

Theres a chap that perform monlogues attends Gainsbro Folk club there is a permathread for GFC on the cat.
They are a freindly buch and if they could point you the right way I am sure they would.

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: Gurney
Date: 31 Mar 09 - 11:22 PM

Google 'Make 'Em Laugh' for monologues.

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: GUEST,rob the roadie
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 08:07 AM

Then there was the Scots lad who did a superb job with "Hamlet" and bother me if I cant remember his name.

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: The Borchester Echo
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 08:47 AM

Adam McNaughtan.

Subject: RE: help: british comic monologuist
From: Dave Roberts
Date: 02 Apr 09 - 07:07 AM

To voice a personal opinion for once, I think Hoffnung's rendering of the story is much much funnier than the cod-Irish song version. I have a ten-inch Decca LP called 'Hoffnung At The Oxford Union' (LF 1330 for those who like to know these things) and on the cover it says 'recorded in co-operation with the BBC on December 4th 1958' and 'featuring the famous Bricklayer's Story "Respected Sir"', which seems to indicate that the story was already well-known by then. Hoffnung attributes the story to a letter from a bricklayer in Golders Green to his employer and published in 'a recent number of the Bulletin Of The Federation Of Civil Engineering Contractors' but this may be an example of the spurious detail which humourists love to use to lend authenticity to unlikely stories.
I wonder if this is the same LP that Harvey Andrews has?