Subject: Lyr Add: WHERE DO YOU GO TO MY DORIS (Les Barker)
From:
Bainbo
Date: 31 Jan 06 - 06:35 PM
Where do you go to, my Doris, by Les Barker, some time in the 70s.
He turned it round to be about inverted snobbery, and how everybody was desperately trying to prove working-class roots.
The references are to Manchester, and other places in North West England.
Eddie Waring - TV rugby football commentator; St Michael - brand name of Marks and Spencer clothes shops; Jimmy Frizzell - manager of Oldham Athletic football club; Colin Bell - Manchester City footballer; Domestos - household bleach. Bramhall - posh area. Oldham - not posh.
You'll have to work out the rest yourself. And you know the saddest part? This isn't copy-and-paste. I've just typed it all out. From memory.
***
Well, you talk just like Eddie Waring, and you dance like Yogi Bear.
Your clothes are all made by St Michael, and there's dandruff and bugs in your hair,
Yes there are, oh aye, itchy coo
You live in a council penthouse, off the boulevard, Newton Heath,
Where you play your Rolling Stones records by the light of Cliff Richard's teeth,
Yes you do, oh aye, itchy coo
But where do you go to, my Doris, when you get on a train?
Are you seeing a smoothy in Salford, or a dirty old man in Dean Lane?
I've seen both your qualifications, you got at Oldham Tech -
Needlework and marine boiler maintenance, and your O-levels come up to your neck.
Yes they do, oh aye, itchycoo
When you go on summer vacation you're found on Blackpool sands,
In your carefully designed topless swimsuit, you look just like one of the lads,
Yes you do, oh aye, itchy coo
And when the snow falls you're found in Widnes, with the others of the jet set.
You sip your Domestos and soda, and down it in one for a bet,
Yes you do, oh aye, itchy coo
But where do you go to, my Doris, when you get on a bus?
Are you seeing a playboy in Failsworth? Is it all over for us?
Your name it is heard in high places - you know Jimmy Frizzell.
He bought you a tortoise for Christmas, and you race it against Colin Bell
And it wins, yes it does, itchy coo
They say that when you get married, it'll be to a millionaire.
You'd better move out of Oldham - won't meet many round there,
No you won't, will you 'eck, itchy coo
But where do you go to, my Doris, when you drive off in your car?
Are you having an an affair with a golfer who thinks half-past-ten's about par?
I remember the back streets of Bramhall, two children playing a game
Each with inverted ambition to shake off a middle-class name
Yes they did, oh aye, itchy coo
So look into my eyes, darling Doris, and remember who you are -
You think you're a working-class scrubber, bt you've got a stockbroker papa,
Yes you have, oh aye, itchy coo
I know where you go to, my Doris, when you go anywhere at all.
You're not having fish suppers in Oldham, but muffins and tea in Bramhall.
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sj
