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04 Dec 08 - 10:04 PM (#2508248) Subject: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Charley Noble Here's the latest report: Click here for article Sorry, I couldn't resist. Cheerily, Charley Noble |
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04 Dec 08 - 11:04 PM (#2508265) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Rapparee I don't dread crabs. |
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04 Dec 08 - 11:37 PM (#2508275) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Peace THIS thread I DO understand. However, Charley Noble's link misses a few fast ways to kill crabs. One involves gasoline and an ice pick. For details, please message me. |
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04 Dec 08 - 11:55 PM (#2508288) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Gurney Old Mike Harding joke: Two boys were arguing, and the teacher asks why. "You sort it out, sir! What's the difference between crabs and lobsters? "Well, crabs walk sideways." "There you are, mate! I TOLD you they were lobsters that you had!" |
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04 Dec 08 - 11:55 PM (#2508289) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Genie Charlie, when I click your link I get asked for a password. What gives? Genie |
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05 Dec 08 - 12:21 AM (#2508295) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Cluin My 9th grade Phys Ed. teacher told us how to get rid of crabs. You dump a fifth of rye in your pubes, then throw a handful of sand in your crotch. The crabs get drunked up and stone each other to death. Yeah, we thought so too... |
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05 Dec 08 - 03:15 AM (#2508348) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Dave Hanson Well someone had to, It's no use standing on the seat, The crabs in here can jump six feet, It's no use going round next door, The crabs in there jump even more. eric |
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05 Dec 08 - 03:35 AM (#2508358) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Big Al Whittle Memories of Derek Brimstone:- And now a little folksong entitled, 'Don't go down to the shrimp boats mother, cos father's coming home with the crabs...' |
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05 Dec 08 - 05:14 PM (#2509003) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Charley Noble Well, I thought I'd get a good haul with this one! Instructive too. Thanks! Charley Noble |
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05 Dec 08 - 05:23 PM (#2509007) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Rapparee Ah! So you deliberately set a crab trap! |
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05 Dec 08 - 05:39 PM (#2509018) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Liz the Squeak I love the typo on the right hand side... about Public Lice treatment.... Surely they should be treated the same in public as they are in private? LTS |
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05 Dec 08 - 05:44 PM (#2509022) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Liz the Squeak And now it's musical. The moral of that tale - always have a shufti* before you have a pee. LTS *shufti or shufty. Allegedly British Military slang for a brief glance; a quick look.' |
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05 Dec 08 - 05:54 PM (#2509029) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: frogprince The variant on Erics's verse that I saw, in a pizza joint bathroom near Northwestern University, was: "Stand on stilts, protect your meat; The crabs in here can jump six feet". |
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06 Dec 08 - 02:29 PM (#2509401) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Wincing Devil You gotta realize that I'm from Maryland (pronounced MURR-lin) the Land of Pleasant Living, where "Hey Babe, I got Crabs" is considered a pickup line. (and a dern effective one too!)
};-( |
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06 Dec 08 - 03:34 PM (#2509438) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Ed T Washroom Grafitti, from the past: Don't throw tooth picks in Urinals, crabs can pole vault. |
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06 Dec 08 - 03:38 PM (#2509442) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Ed T Hopefully, not oe of these: http://www.projectufo.ca/drupal/Chinese_Mitten_Crab http://www.projectufo.ca/drupal/European_Green_Crab |
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07 Dec 08 - 01:40 PM (#2509643) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Dead Horse Blue Unction |
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07 Dec 08 - 02:09 PM (#2509657) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Will Fly LTS: *shufti or shufty. Allegedly British Military slang for a brief glance; a quick look.' Yup - "forces" slang for a look. Taken from the Arabic. So "shufti bint" meant "look at the girl" (I won't attempt to translate "shufti kush" for you...) My father came back from 5 years in the RAF - much of it in Egypt - in 1946, with these phrases constantly on his lips. And the little English/Arabic Arabic/English phrasebook issued by the military came back with him. I used to look over it as a little boy. I could count in Arabic at one time, but all I can remember now is "wahed, etnein, talata..." |
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07 Dec 08 - 02:19 PM (#2509665) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Georgiansilver I guess it would be better to have lobsters on your piano than crabs on your organ |
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07 Dec 08 - 02:22 PM (#2509670) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: gnu And pecker tracks on yer zipper. |
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07 Dec 08 - 06:49 PM (#2509817) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Rapparee Or vice-versa. |
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07 Dec 08 - 07:53 PM (#2509835) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Liz the Squeak I knew it had origins other than the British Military which is why I put 'allegedly', knowing Wikipediment's idea of accuracy. Couldn't decide if its origins were Middle Eastern, Asian or Romany but if you say Arabic, then that's fairly reasonable... the British Army has done more than its' fair share of meddling in Middle Eastern politics over the centuries. LTS |
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08 Dec 08 - 07:42 AM (#2509903) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Bryn Pugh Blue unction has only one function : It's used for the killing of crabs Which some calls the "mechanised dandruff" And others the "Sandy McNabs". A 2% solution of mercuric chloride (aka corrosive sublimate) in alcohol and water sorts them out in 24 hours. I have been told that shaving off does the trick. |
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08 Dec 08 - 01:50 PM (#2510077) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Nigel Parsons Yet more 'perishing' crabs! And: With lyrics! Cheers Nigel |
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08 Dec 08 - 06:39 PM (#2510263) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Dead Horse "I have been told that shaving off does the trick." Shavin off what???? Seems a bit drastic. Yet more crabs |
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09 Dec 08 - 03:47 AM (#2510456) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Liz the Squeak Thanks for that Dead - I startled the whole family by guffawing in a manner unbecoming a TV star like what I am! LTS |
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03 Feb 09 - 09:00 PM (#2556658) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Ed T Super Clap: http://www.ottawacitizen.com/Health/Gonorrhea+super+emerging+Canada+study/1246443/story.html |
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03 Feb 09 - 09:34 PM (#2556674) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: SINSULL I read recently that mayonaisse will rid you of the pests and condition your hair as well. |
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03 Feb 09 - 11:10 PM (#2556724) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Ebbie Hope they don't look like this! Get enough together and they're excellent eating. ewwww |
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04 Feb 09 - 06:20 AM (#2556885) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Ed T Crabsolutely: When you absolutely have crabs. Source, Urban Dictionary |
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04 Feb 09 - 11:18 AM (#2557084) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: EBarnacle The one time I caught crabs, I ended up shaving, using blue ointment and boiling my underwear to get rid of them. It still took a couple of weeks. I am really thankful they were only pubic lice, as I had really grown attached to my beard by then. |
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04 Feb 09 - 11:34 AM (#2557100) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: frogprince "I read recently that mayonaisse will rid you of the pests and condition your hair as well. " If I were really crude, I might mention that it also makes snacks tastier... |
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04 Feb 09 - 11:43 AM (#2557107) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: topical tom Simple solution-quit crabbing. |
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04 Feb 09 - 11:51 AM (#2557111) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Ed T Should boiling ones underwear be cross-listed under idle thoughts? |
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04 Feb 09 - 12:17 PM (#2557135) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: EBarnacle I assure you it was not idle. It was an effort to kill the determined little bastards and destroy their eggs. |
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04 Feb 09 - 12:43 PM (#2557162) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Rasener Is that why Michael Jackson is always grabbing his crutch and jumping about all the time. |
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04 Feb 09 - 01:40 PM (#2557199) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: olddude this is a true story I swear. A buddie of mine in Vietnam got them. So he goes to the first sargent, He tells him, well you could go to the medical tent but me I would go over to the supply hut and just dump a can of ddt on them that will get rid of em ... well he went for the supply hut ... start screaming cause it was burning so bad so he runs in the shower, well the water truck never came so there was only a drop of water coming out ... Lucky there was lots of beer!! Ouch |
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04 Feb 09 - 02:16 PM (#2557227) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: GUEST Would the first crab species be called a craboriginal? Or was this actually the first aboriginal person to fish crabs? |
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04 Feb 09 - 02:48 PM (#2557254) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: 3refs My first and only experience was during a stay in The Don Jail, in Toronto. Now you all know why I hate the city! |
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04 Feb 09 - 02:49 PM (#2557256) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: 3refs In 1974! |
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04 Feb 09 - 02:53 PM (#2557258) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: SINSULL Michael Jackson uses a crutch? So glad the frog chose not to be crude... And the ad below reads: Fresh Alaskan King Crab |
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04 Feb 09 - 11:18 PM (#2557622) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: GUEST,Daniel There was a young woman from Hitchin, Who was scratchin' her crotch in the kitchen. Her mother said, "Rose, It's the crabs, I suppose?" Rose said, "Yep, and the buggers are itchin'" |
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05 Feb 09 - 06:12 PM (#2558429) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: skipy The first uniforms of the newly formed Royal Air Force where made from blue material originally destined for Russia. On the march past of 1 April 1919 the saluting naval officer handing over control of troops to become the RAF remarked (quietly) that they looked like "crabs", due to the colour being the same as the cream, to this day & for many more decades I hope, we are still referred to as "crabs" by the RN. We, do have other terms for them of course! Skipy |
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05 Feb 09 - 07:21 PM (#2558481) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Rowan Now, where's the benzyl benzoate when you need it? Liz's link to the song reminded me of another music hall gem concerning a lobster, of which the only words I can remember are from the chorus; Roll tiddly ol, tiddly I bust, never let your dingle dangle in the dust. Cheers, Rowan |
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05 Feb 09 - 07:41 PM (#2558506) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Charley Noble Rowan- That's an alternative chorus to "The Old She-Crab" which has been discussed extensively in other threads but I was tempted as well to post a version here. Cheerily, Charley Noble |
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05 Feb 09 - 07:57 PM (#2558525) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Rowan Thanks, Charley. I now remember the opening lines of the song I referred to; Good morning Mr Lee, good morning Mr Lee, Have you got a lobster you can sell to me? The rest has a similar plot line to The Old She-Crab but is a different song; surprisingly, I could find no reference to it on Mudcat. I must be doing something wrong. Again. Cheers, Rowan |
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05 Feb 09 - 08:00 PM (#2558527) Subject: RE: BS: Those dreaded crabs From: Peace "I have been told that shaving off does the trick." Don't ever believe that, Bryn. |
