|
07 Feb 09 - 06:02 PM (#2560368) Subject: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: GUEST,cookie-less For example, when valentines day is approaching, it's a weekend and all your friends seem to have disappeared, and you feel down and lonely....?
OK, so I know you're registered and going anonymous just for this thread, but we've had a real problem with drive-by anonymous posters. I'll let this go, but don't go thinking it's allowed. -Joe Offer- |
|
07 Feb 09 - 06:12 PM (#2560375) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Georgiansilver Depends what you want from life... does Valentines day really mean anything to you... do you have to think of 14th Feb as anything more than just another day or do you want someone in your life????? I live alone and don't feel lonely apart from the odd evening when I am sitting perhaps on my own and thinking it would be nice to have someone........ There are benefits to being on ones own.... there are benefits to being in a relationship.... all a matter of choice. To me Valentines day is just another day although I do admit to getting Valentine cards each year....well at least one anyway...sometimes more. |
|
07 Feb 09 - 06:36 PM (#2560396) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: gnu I check the Mudcat threads and see if there is anyone to banter with. I go to a private chat of a few friends to see if there is any banter there. I watch TV. I wash the garage... apologies to George Carlin. |
|
07 Feb 09 - 06:40 PM (#2560401) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: gnu Oh yeah, I do this quite often. |
|
07 Feb 09 - 06:59 PM (#2560412) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Sleepy Rosie Last Valentine's day my Mother died. So there was a pitiful little bunch of us (seated mainly M&F, M&F, M&F) sitting together with tears constantly streaming down our faces, in a corner of a country 'foody' pub, otherwise filled to capacity with lovey dovey Valentines couples. And my Uncle says: "All these people here must be thinking - those couples at that table, must be having a the most crappy Valentine's dinner ever.." Fortunately I never was that interested in Valentine's day. I'm much more a fan of spontaniously imposed little gifts. Those worthless tiny little trinkets, which when spied and captured (or indeed other insubstantial 'gifts' created, imagined or otherwise facilitated) by someone who truly intimately 'gets' your tastes and inclinations, and will send you in a sparkly childlike whirl of glee. Now that's romantic to me. Dates are not interesting to me. But really sensing someone and intuiting how to touch them ...gets you everywhere. If you feel lonely. Get into some poetry sites. Join some clubs with other lonely people. I've heard it does wonders for your love life... |
|
07 Feb 09 - 07:31 PM (#2560429) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: McGrath of Harlow "What do you do when you feel lonely? This has to be a song... |
|
07 Feb 09 - 08:00 PM (#2560445) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Ebbie What can I do when I'm feeling lonely What can I say but in my own way That try as I may, on Valentine's Day I'll always be thinking of you. Only ha |
|
07 Feb 09 - 08:10 PM (#2560453) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: McGrath of Harlow What do you do when you feel lonely? Seems like you've lost your one and only Just you pick up your mouse and get online, Call up the Cat and you soon feel fine. |
|
07 Feb 09 - 08:15 PM (#2560462) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: kendall I go to a weekend party of folkies where we make music and swap stories for three days. There's just something about good friends, single malt and all kinds of folk music. Dancing, fiddling and even a tune or two on the highland pipes. |
|
07 Feb 09 - 09:04 PM (#2560499) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: MAG I'm jealous, Kendall. I want to live where I can do that. About 3 times a year I make it to a great music weekend. |
|
07 Feb 09 - 09:53 PM (#2560524) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Riginslinger Hey gnu, that was pretty neat! |
|
07 Feb 09 - 10:03 PM (#2560529) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: GUEST,jeff Did Anne Murray really say 'celtic' w/a soft 'c' as in 'see'? I gotta 'see' that again. :-) |
|
07 Feb 09 - 10:20 PM (#2560536) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Janie In thinking about this, I realize that I haven't felt lonely in so long that I don't know what I would do. I need a lot of solitude. |
|
07 Feb 09 - 11:08 PM (#2560562) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: kendall MAG, why don't you start a song circle? The one I mentioned was started 40 years ago and it got so big we had to make it by invitation only. |
|
08 Feb 09 - 01:43 AM (#2560600) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Barry Finn Mg, you're on the wrong Northern coast. You need to move to the "Northeast" not live in the Northwest. We may have a bit more snow here & it may be a bit colder but it's a hotbed of music, enough to melt any icy heart Barry |
|
08 Feb 09 - 03:04 AM (#2560603) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: catspaw49 Had a friend with a step-Dad who would always say to anyone complaining of anything, "Well shit Bub, all you need's a good physic." Personally, I ain't real sure that an enema or a good shit is the solution to most problems but to tell you the truth, I don't know that it ain't either! Seems like you're looking for reasons to be depressed and in this country we have so many simpleass "holidays" that I can see how you might be lonely......like, what the hell is "Sweetest Day" and why the fock do we need it? Winningest people I know are often alone but never lonely. If you're so insecure within yourself that you need someone around then get a grip. Or go buy a Fleet enema and shove it up your ass. Now have a laugh and take this message in the spirit it was written. If everyone is elsewhere and not with you, just think of what they're missing.....................unless you really are or truly want to be a whiney titty baby! Spaw |
|
08 Feb 09 - 03:48 AM (#2560618) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: VirginiaTam You could start an anti-valentine day campaign in your area - that might make you some friends. I used to write vitriolic prose and poetry when I felt lonely, angry, left behind, unconsidered, ignored, etc. After the mind cramping shite was on the page (toilet paper) where I could investigate it, understand how much it stank, I could then flush it and get on with life, comfortably purged. |
|
08 Feb 09 - 04:00 AM (#2560625) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Georgiansilver Flush away your cares and woe, Here I go singing low. Bye Bye Valentines day... OK so the rhythm isn't quite there but the sentiment is LOL |
|
08 Feb 09 - 04:03 AM (#2560627) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Will Fly Never feel lonely - too many places to go to make music, play, sing, have a beer, meet people, gigs, concerts to organise. A day or two of peace is usually very welcome! But if I DO feel lonely, I have two acoustic guitars, one electric guitar, an acoustic bass guitar, a box of blues harps, fiddle, appalachian dulcimer, tenor banjo, mandolin, tenor ukulele, electric violin, keyboard, high whistle in D and - if the worst comes to the worst - I can tap out "Dixie" with two pencils (one held against my mouth and the other tapping it). |
|
08 Feb 09 - 04:31 AM (#2560636) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Amergin I take out the foot pump and blow up a girlfriend... |
|
08 Feb 09 - 09:17 AM (#2560779) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Mickey191 Thanks Gnu, The Rankins were great! I am alone with some great memories. Very rarely feel down - music is the elixir that cheers. |
|
08 Feb 09 - 09:40 AM (#2560797) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: GUEST,Ian cookieless I regularly post as 'Ian cookieless' but I am not the 'cookie-less' originator of this thread. I am single, too, and at times like Valentine's (when, as you say, friends in couples are doing Valentinesy things) I might go and see my aged parents, read a completely absorbing book, go for a long walk somewhere stunning and bracing, go to a folk club ... In other words, occupy your mind so it doesn't wander onto your feelings of being alone on a day meant for couples. Naughty P.S. I might also think of a past partner where things ended badly and just be glad I don't have to suffer *her* on Valentine's Day! |
|
08 Feb 09 - 11:03 AM (#2560860) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Catherine Jayne I haven't felt lonely for about 2 and a half years now, but, before when I felt lonely I'd look at photos, read a good book or pick up the phone and chat to a friend. |
|
08 Feb 09 - 12:35 PM (#2560935) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Amos I call up me wife and explain the situation, and make her dinner and do the dishes. A |
|
08 Feb 09 - 12:48 PM (#2560944) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: bubblyrat We do not have "George's Day"----It is SAINT George's Day The Welsh do not go mad on "David's Day,",but they do on SAINT David's Day The Irish, wherever they may be, celebrate SAINT Patrick's Day So who is this "Valentine" of modern times?? Could it be,perhaps. SAINT Valentine ?? Who,or what,is involved on the "Valentine's" Day of which you write?? Or am I ( or YOU !) missing something here ?? |
|
08 Feb 09 - 12:57 PM (#2560952) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: VirginiaTam a victorian creation - penny dreadfuls given on the 14th of February and then co-opted by the the greeting card companies.. All hail Hallmark. Hallowed be thy ability to make a profit from even the stupidest idea. |
|
08 Feb 09 - 01:39 PM (#2560996) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: gnu Amos... hahahahaaaa!!! |
|
08 Feb 09 - 01:40 PM (#2560997) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: kendall The function of music is to free the mind from the tyranny of conscious thought. Take up the banjo. It is impossible to feel bad while playing the banjo. You can make others feel bad, but that's their problem. |
|
08 Feb 09 - 02:06 PM (#2561024) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: McGrath of Harlow It is impossible to feel bad while playing the banjo. You can make others feel bad... That's not the best combination if it's being lonely that's the problem. But it can be an ideal one when you're a grumpy old sod and just want to cheer yourself up. (Major Bloodknock in the Goon Show knew that!) |
|
08 Feb 09 - 02:13 PM (#2561029) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: GUEST,LTS pretending to do housework I'm with Sleepy Rosie on this. I'd far rather have a gift on say, the third Thursday in June, because the giver saw it and immediately thought I'd like it, rather than something on a certain day because the giver thinks I would moan if I received nothing. LTS |
|
08 Feb 09 - 02:14 PM (#2561033) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Rapparee I have about 6,000 books in house, I don't know how many recordings, mountains, desert, lava flows -- how could I be lonely? |
|
08 Feb 09 - 02:30 PM (#2561042) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Amergin Well the commercialization is rammed down everyone's throat....they say you have to buy this or do that or he or she will be angry....it will make them happy if you spend a small fortune you dont really have on a necklace, so what if they break up with you the next day and you never see that money again. Isn't it worth making them smile and purchasing their love for that one special night? And those of us who are left in the dark, alone in our own caverns, feel the stain of loneliness, feel almost as if something is wrong with us because we do not have a partner on valentine's day. Then the next day everything is back to normal, but you have to hear other people telling what they did or what they got for this day...almost like at christmas. However, as the days go by no one cares anymore, and while you still feel lonely you don't feel quite so inadequate, don't feel quite so bad. IN fact you smile inwardly at yourself at the money you just saved. nt |
|
08 Feb 09 - 02:45 PM (#2561064) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: kendall My wife doesn't like chocolate. |
|
08 Feb 09 - 03:35 PM (#2561100) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Amos Sainthood is optional, Bubbly, but love, itself, is not. The thing to do when lonely is to go forth into the world and find things --animal, vegetable, mineral, and human--to love. A |
|
08 Feb 09 - 04:17 PM (#2561132) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: VirginiaTam I once received a stick. It was very curiously shaped twig that resembled a dog lifting its hind leg to take a leak. I love that gift. |
|
08 Feb 09 - 04:40 PM (#2561144) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Bonzo3legs Plug in my guitar and play LOUD! |
|
08 Feb 09 - 04:42 PM (#2561146) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Georgiansilver On the subject of gifts.... It is great receiving them at those 'organised' times but don't you think the spontaneous ones are by far the best..... The gifts I didn't expect are those that stick best in my memory. |
|
08 Feb 09 - 05:23 PM (#2561178) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Liz the Squeak Kendall - we have come to an arrangement. I don't send her pink flamingoes and she lets me have her chocolate allowance... :D Had any pink flamingoes recently? Then it must be time for my allowance! As for me being lonely... I'm often lonliest when in a crowd of people I know... but if I have my sewing or a book, then I'm easily consoled. LTS |
|
08 Feb 09 - 05:47 PM (#2561195) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Rapparee I just reread my post. Let me explain that I do NOT have mountains, deserts, and lava flows in the house. They are outside. My wife does not permit lava flows inside the house, although she will permit chocolate. |
|
08 Feb 09 - 06:19 PM (#2561220) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Bobert Ummmm, loneliness is a form of depression that can come upon folks who aren't "alone"... There are lots of depression threads here to check out for things to do to help you thru these bouts... The most important thing to keep in mind is that it will pass... Good luck... B~ |
|
08 Feb 09 - 06:43 PM (#2561250) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: GUEST,cookie-less Yeh - I was just about to say I didn't really mean this thread to be about Valentines day... it's more about those moments that Bobert mentioned. But thankyou to all those with helpful suggestions :) And yes Joe, I'm sorry, I forgot about the guest thing. But you have to admit the Mudcat response to this type of thread isn't always too friendly, hence the anonymity :) |
|
08 Feb 09 - 08:58 PM (#2561325) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Sorcha Er...maybe 'dis' your ex sometimes from what I've seen here? |
|
08 Feb 09 - 09:55 PM (#2561357) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: SINSULL I feel loneliest in crowds of people. The solution is to get away to a quiet room or place and decompress. |
|
08 Feb 09 - 10:43 PM (#2561376) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: KT I don't think of Valentine's Day as being for couples, only. I think of it as a day for people who love - acknowledging the fact that they DO love. If the approaching Valentine's day looms as a day that will be difficult, write a note of love, support, or friendship, to someone in your life that YOU love. You never know how meaningful a few kind words may be for someone else. Don't worry about being on the receiving end. KT ****************** "Take up the banjo. It is impossible to feel bad while playing the banjo. You can make others feel bad, but that's their problem." LOL!!! |
|
09 Feb 09 - 10:42 AM (#2561730) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: maire-aine If I'm feeling sorry for myself, I vent by writing about it in my journal. Once I get out of me and into the book, I can close the book and get on with something else. I can usually find something to do, whether it's reading or working on a new song or making a pot of soup. There are a few places nearby where I'm kind of a "regular", so I do have places where I can hang out with friends. M |
|
09 Feb 09 - 11:23 AM (#2561769) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: GUEST,leeneia Pick up a phone and call a relative. |
|
09 Feb 09 - 12:05 PM (#2561804) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Donuel I play some rhythm and blues on a cello. |
|
09 Feb 09 - 01:20 PM (#2561892) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Georgiansilver The choice of being with an ex-partner or being on my own... no contest... she found another she prefers to me... good luck... I hope he has a better time than she gave me. Been on my own for six years and enjoying all the things I do with my time. Loneliness is not really an issue... have loads of acquaintances... a few good friends and a life!!! |
|
09 Feb 09 - 01:26 PM (#2561895) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: wysiwyg What do I do when I feel lonely? I peer into the feeling to see what's in there, and then I decide what to do about it. Sometimes it means a good, cleansing boo-hoo. Sometimes it means reaching out to the people I know are there in the way I need at that time. Sometimes it's thinking about how to do some things differently so that there will be more people of that sort. Sometimes it's God calling me and me not knowing how to respond. Sometimes it's me looking in my own navel too much and I decide to go do something for someone else, keep a promise, do a boring task, learn a new thing, etc. Sometimes it's an overdue nap or a need for a certain kind of movie. Sometimes it's a need to exercise, hard and breathlessly. Or sometimes it's just a need to sing. ~S~ |
|
09 Feb 09 - 02:52 PM (#2562007) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: katlaughing Funny, how some people seem to be lonely while living with someone AND having someone on the side. |
|
09 Feb 09 - 03:48 PM (#2562075) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: SINSULL Not funny, kat. Sad. I have seen this too many times and it usually a sign that the offender is trying to fill an empty, unfillable hole inside themselves. Funny is the number of people who live alone and yet are rarely if ever lonely. |
|
09 Feb 09 - 04:16 PM (#2562105) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: katlaughing True, Sins, it is sad, esp. as it involves more than the offender and their side show. Also, so true about how some who live alone are never lonely. My brother is always lonely, always looking outside himself and never finding. He just can't seem to look inside and love himself enough. I have hope for him, though...self-love precedes all else which can be positive in our lives, imo. If we don't have that, like you say, one can try to fill it up with other lovers, children, houses,work, possessions, etc. and still be lonely. All we can do is support the ones they leave in their wake and hope they learn the lessons of self-love. |
|
09 Feb 09 - 04:16 PM (#2562106) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: maire-aine I've lost track of how many times I've thought to myself "there are worse things than being alone". Usually when I've been within earshot of somebody who's being a real jerk. M |
|
09 Feb 09 - 04:54 PM (#2562142) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: SINSULL LOL I am guilty of too many cats. |
|
09 Feb 09 - 05:24 PM (#2562171) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: topical tom Mudcat and wine usually do the trick. |
|
10 Feb 09 - 07:29 AM (#2562578) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Ron Davies They say if you learn a song you have a friend for life. So the more songs you learn, the more friends you have. And if you want you can sing songs about miserable people--to indicate to yourself that there are people even worse off than you are. Unhappy love songs--of which there are uncounted numbers--are particularly good for this. |
|
10 Feb 09 - 08:21 AM (#2562629) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: HuwG What do you do when you feel lonely? Well, I go electric, and perform the rest of Clapton's "Layla" I soon have plenty of people complaining about the noise, and a few folkies I know shouting "Judas!" |
|
10 Feb 09 - 10:00 AM (#2562713) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Maryrrf What Ron Davies said. When I used to play at Pat Troy's Ireland's Own in Alexandria on Sunday evenings, when Valentine's day rolled around I invited folks to a "My Bloody Valentine" evening where we strove to outdo ourselves with horrific love gone wrong ballads and songs - think "Omie Wise", "Pretty Polly", "Young Hunting" etc. We had a great time! |
|
10 Feb 09 - 10:36 AM (#2562731) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Mickey191 Just recalled: Elvis' howlingly (is that a word?) funny take on "Are you lonesome tonight?" Luv it! |
|
10 Feb 09 - 10:47 AM (#2562741) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: katlaughing HuwG, thanks for the link! |
|
10 Feb 09 - 04:36 PM (#2563125) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: GUEST,mg It is not something I have so I don't understand it. I can fulfill my social needs for the day by saying good morning to the bus driver. And I always want to sleep for about five more hours per day so I would do that rather than seek out company...it would be nice to have a place like Cheers though..just drop in and out...mg |
|
10 Feb 09 - 06:55 PM (#2563277) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp "What do you do when you feel lonely?" Well, first I get kinda morose and then I drink and smoke heavily. The more I drink and smoke, the more morose I get. The need to share my loneliness and my growing morosity with others eventually drives me out to some local cheap and sleazy bar, where I sit down and have a few more drinks and smokes. I am usually surrounded by various lowlife types, strangers and casual acquaintances who are mostly in a similar mood to mine. You got yer lowlife Humans, you got yer lowlife Simians, there ain't much to choose between 'em. We start sharin' stories about why we are lonely and morose and comparin' notes, so to speak, and decidin' who is to blame for our morosity. Sooner or later we begin arguin' about somethin' that either don't matter or that we can't change...like politics or religion or interspecies relations. Sooner or later some bozo says somethin' he shouldn't have, and tempers flare. Then the fists, bottles, knives, boots, and chairs begin to fly as I hammer home my point inta somebody's thick skull who shoulda known better than to get lippy with Chongo Chimp. At that point I am too damn busy just stayin' alive to be lonely anymore. Problem solved. - Chongo Chimp |
|
10 Feb 09 - 08:58 PM (#2563358) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Joe_F It is hard to say "I am morose than most" with a straight face. |
|
11 Feb 09 - 09:12 AM (#2563767) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: jacqui.c I agree that it is sometimes possible to feel lonely in a crowd. It's difficult to feel lonely with loving family and friends in my life. |
|
11 Feb 09 - 09:35 AM (#2563791) Subject: RE: BS: What do you do when you feel lonely? From: Catherine Jayne I agree with what Jacqui just said. It is difficult to feel lonely with loving family and friends in your life, for that I am truly blessed and hope that everyone else finds the same. I was talking with my mother in law last week and although she is happy living on her own she can often feel lonely when days can go by without the phone ringing or someone popping round for a cuppa and a chat. I think thats the same for a lot of elderly people. We try to pick up the phone and give her a call to say hi and make sure there isn't anything she needs. We go round for the day once a week too and she looks forward to that as she can't get out as much as she would like and has to rely in others. I think those that are lonely are often those that are forgotten. |