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18 Sep 10 - 07:27 PM (#2989432) Subject: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: gnu I took it down a few notches. I used the #2 clipper rigginfrigin on me hairs on me head and NOW I see how much me ears are out of kilter. Not that I couldn't see it before, but I just never paid any attention. Never really cared how I looked so I never really looked. Hey... when your handsome, ya just don't bother. But, I used the #2 (1/8th inch) guide on the clippers. As I was inspecting the haircut, I saw that, since the slice and dice for the parotid gland on the left side (full parotidectomy), my left ear is out further at the top and is lower than my right ear. Even if I tilt my head and smile coyly into the mirror. (Sorry for that image.) Whatever shall I do? |
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18 Sep 10 - 07:31 PM (#2989433) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: jacqui.c Wear a floppy hat? D o a Van Gogh? |
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18 Sep 10 - 07:43 PM (#2989437) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Ebbie To add a unique twist, let your hair grow long and bushy on the one side (your choice) and do a close trim on the other. Everyone will know you did it on purpose and admire your creativeness. Then post a photo. postaphoto. Catchy. |
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18 Sep 10 - 07:48 PM (#2989438) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: gnu I have a floppy hat... a Tilly. It now flops to the left. A Van Gogh? I got rid of whatshername. She wasn't worth listening to even when she bent my ear. |
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18 Sep 10 - 07:50 PM (#2989439) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Bee-dubya-ell Grow some natty dreads, Mon. |
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18 Sep 10 - 07:51 PM (#2989441) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: gnu Ebbie... ahhh... youse in Alaska can grow yer own weed, eh? On accounta that seems uniquely twisted. |
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18 Sep 10 - 07:52 PM (#2989442) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Melissa if you're worried about people staring (they'd probably be too enchanted by that coy smile to turn away) the easiest thing would probably be to grow another ear. If you have three ears, that ought to distract folks from noticing your mismatched set. They'll be consumed with envy and admiration. I'm starting to get a little bit envious just picturing it.. |
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18 Sep 10 - 07:55 PM (#2989443) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: gnu Dreads... now, that sounds cool. If I could get some of that Alaskan weed and some Dreads I could do some of that Raggin music and chill on the slainte. |
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18 Sep 10 - 08:02 PM (#2989445) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: gnu Three ears? Only if I could breathe thru one. Handsome AND popular! |
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18 Sep 10 - 09:16 PM (#2989468) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Bill D "...if I could breathe thru one..." ...ummmm... watch Olympic long-distance swimmers Ears? I guess it's plastic surgery for you! |
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18 Sep 10 - 09:30 PM (#2989475) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Melissa Not just handsome and popular, gnu..you could be a youtube sensation! |
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18 Sep 10 - 09:52 PM (#2989481) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Bee-dubya-ell Catch syphilis and let it go untreated. Nobody will even notice your lopsided ears after your nose rots off. |
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18 Sep 10 - 10:18 PM (#2989486) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Beer Go dance as a male stripper. No one will notice your ears. ad. on second thoughts!!! |
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19 Sep 10 - 12:23 AM (#2989508) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: katlaughing Get a tasteful, creative, expressive tattoo and no one will even see your ears!:-) |
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19 Sep 10 - 12:27 AM (#2989510) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Ebbie Hmmmmmm. There is one more alternative: Live with it. :) I know a woman who has the oddest looking feet I have ever seen on anyone outside a hobbit. She wears sandals. |
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19 Sep 10 - 12:41 AM (#2989513) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Gurney One earring. It'll be odd anyway. Downside is that you'll be greeted "Hello, sailor!" |
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19 Sep 10 - 03:02 AM (#2989540) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: VirginiaTam gauge it |
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19 Sep 10 - 03:12 AM (#2989545) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: VirginiaTam given that the title of the thread implies that the clippers made your ears lopsided, I could say get rid of the clippers or your could create a diversion |
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19 Sep 10 - 04:53 AM (#2989577) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: John MacKenzie Have your specs adjusted, so they sit straight |
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19 Sep 10 - 07:51 AM (#2989629) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Little Hawk Do what Chongo does about stuff like that. Take pride in your uniqueness. ;-) |
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19 Sep 10 - 10:46 AM (#2989699) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Bee-dubya-ell Actually, we humans aren't as symmetrical as we think. Our legs and arms are of slightly different lengths. Most people's dominant side feet and hands are slightly larger than their mates. (A ring that fits my left hand is too small for my right hand.) It's almost unheard of for a woman to have perfectly symmetrical natural breasts. Most men have one testicle that dangles a bit lower than its mate. And the two sides of our faces are so different that photographs created using mirror-image substitution come out looking like two entirely different people. So why worry about slightly lopsided ears? They're just par for the course. |
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19 Sep 10 - 11:14 AM (#2989705) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Ebbie Actually, beedub, I have never understood why the two halves of the head are so different from each other. I have been told, Well, why would they be the same? Which to me is begging the question- why wouldn't they be the same? |
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19 Sep 10 - 11:36 AM (#2989721) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: VirginiaTam For some the difference in foot size is such that they have to buy 2 pairs of the same shoe. What can be done with the odd shoes? |
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19 Sep 10 - 02:12 PM (#2989801) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: SINSULL Saw the title of this thread and knew instantly who had started it. In the 60s, that lopsided cut was high fashion but our ears mathched. Liza Minelli had gone far with the lopsided look. Maybe you should contact her. Meantime, you need a diversion. I recommend shaving off an eyebrow. If it is on the same side as your lower ear it will confirm the illusion of a list to starboard. On the other side it will balance out the unevenness and make you look straight. Odd but straight. BWL - How do you know that about most men's testicles?How do you spend your spare time? |
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19 Sep 10 - 02:19 PM (#2989807) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: gnu BWL... "It's almost unheard of for a woman to have perfectly symmetrical natural breasts." I do not care. |
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19 Sep 10 - 02:35 PM (#2989815) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: John MacKenzie There was a young girl from Devizes Her breasts were of different sizes One was so small, It was no use at all, While the other was large, and won prizes |
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19 Sep 10 - 02:39 PM (#2989817) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Melissa I thought that I had wavy hair Until I shaved. Instead, I find that I have straight hair And a very wavy head. Sheldon Allan Silverstein |
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19 Sep 10 - 03:06 PM (#2989831) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Uncle_DaveO What to do when you see in the mirror that you have lopsided ears? Stop looking in mirrors. Dave Oesterreich |
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19 Sep 10 - 03:17 PM (#2989835) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: SINSULL There once was a gnu from New Brunswick Who tried to make sense of his cow lick. The cowlick was tamed But much to his shame His ears showed alarmingly asymmetric. |
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19 Sep 10 - 03:34 PM (#2989843) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: gnu Love it SINS! |
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19 Sep 10 - 03:50 PM (#2989848) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Bill D Happy Gnu ears |
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19 Sep 10 - 04:44 PM (#2989879) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: katlaughing Well-done, Sins!!!! |
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19 Sep 10 - 04:58 PM (#2989888) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: gnu BTW... I really don't care about it. It just seemed like a good idea for a silly thread. I mean, none of youse can see me ears anyway. Unless I post a pic. And I shant for such a silly purpose. Just reading SINS' last post was worth it. |
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19 Sep 10 - 08:29 PM (#2989998) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Beer Good picture of Gnu Bill D |
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19 Sep 10 - 08:38 PM (#2990002) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: SINSULL gnu, I am not sure if we ever posted pictures. Barry Finn's daughter once trimmed his hair for him. When she was done he looked like Mo of the Three Stooges or a medieval monk. Shaved straight around above his ears. He took a lot of ribbing but didn't seem to care. LOL Poor Barry. Glad you enjoyed my bit of doggerel. I am thinking of compiling a diary of my life in verse and inflicting an installment on Mudcat once a week. Unique idea, no? SINS, being bad |
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19 Sep 10 - 08:42 PM (#2990005) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: gnu Go for it SINS! |
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19 Sep 10 - 08:46 PM (#2990007) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Bill D Yeah! You can call it SINSABOUTVERSE! |
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19 Sep 10 - 09:50 PM (#2990033) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: open mike National Odd Shoe Exchange initials spell NOSE don't you think they should have had it spell out Foot? |
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19 Sep 10 - 10:48 PM (#2990055) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: GUEST,leeneia After three bus trips to the optometrist over glasses that just didn't feel right, my sister was finally helped by the head guy, who stomped out, announced that one of her ears was 1/4-inch lower than the other, and why couldn't the assistants figure that out? When I heard her story, I realized that my ears are the same. The next time I got glasses, I asked the assistant to adjust them for ears which don't match, and I got the first comfortable glasses I have ever had in my life. My point, gnu, is that your ears may never have matched exactly, but you never thought much about them until the operation. |
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19 Sep 10 - 11:07 PM (#2990066) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: SINSULL Oh for heaven's sake! Wear a hat until your hair grows in. AND NO COMB OVER! LOL |
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20 Sep 10 - 07:59 AM (#2990192) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: John MacKenzie Can you just imagine, g the Donald Trump lookalike? ☺☻ |
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20 Sep 10 - 08:34 AM (#2990205) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Charmion There is absolutely nothing about a bad haircut that three weeks can't fix. In gnu's case, four. |
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20 Sep 10 - 08:36 AM (#2990208) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: SINSULL And next time, let a professional do it. |
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20 Sep 10 - 08:47 AM (#2990218) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: gnu A week ago I had a "pro" trim my stache (free of charge when I took Mum to her salon). THAT'S gonna take four weeks to look halfway normal again. But, I don't have to look at it. |
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20 Sep 10 - 09:56 AM (#2990245) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Uncle_DaveO Gnu, maybe you need to adopt the software designer's credo: "That's not a bug, that's a FEATURE!" Dave Oesterreich |
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21 Sep 10 - 07:52 AM (#2990771) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Hrothgar Looks a bit eerie, does it? |
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21 Sep 10 - 08:30 AM (#2990784) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: John MacKenzie That's a canal, and not the one in his ear either |
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21 Sep 10 - 08:52 AM (#2990793) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: SINSULL gnu, You need a wife. She could solve so many problems for you. And by creating a few she could distract you from your woes. SINS, ducking for cover |
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21 Sep 10 - 10:30 AM (#2990837) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: gnu MMFFTT... mmfftt... mmfftt |
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21 Sep 10 - 12:14 PM (#2990882) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: John MacKenzie It was hard enough to get someone to take over the payments for the last one, I believe :) |
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21 Sep 10 - 02:25 PM (#2990958) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: gnu Well put, John. >;-) |
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21 Sep 10 - 04:31 PM (#2991031) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Art Thieme I had two thirds of my right ear removed recently -- because of cancer. Sort of a "lobotomy" of sorts you might say. I guess I do recommend it. It'll straighten out your ears nicely. Art |
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21 Sep 10 - 04:42 PM (#2991034) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: gnu Sorry to hear that Art. Skin cancer? Too much sun? With my slice and dices, partial parotidectomey on the right, full on the left, I have developed stories... too much milk and cheese and such doesn't sound very macho. Now, the chainsaw story is good. The hockey stick story is okay in the right crowd. Perhaps your's could be, "It was either the pack of pit bulls or me." Or about the night you kicked Mike Tyson's ass. Just funnin. I find humour, even inane humour, such as this thread is a daily requirement for sanity. Whatever floats yer boat eh? |
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21 Sep 10 - 05:07 PM (#2991049) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: John MacKenzie Sort of, ear today, gone tomorrow Art? ☺☻ |
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21 Sep 10 - 09:37 PM (#2991183) Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided From: Art Thieme gnu, I suspect my problem was caused by the ten years I spent playing music on the Mississippi River. All that sun adds up they say. And I agree about the humor. It gets me by most of the time. But I've come to realize that often Mudcatters don't see my humor easily---or they just get pissed off. But for escaping from the down times of our situations here, it's rather indispensable. --------- On we go-----------until we don't. Art |
