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Lyr Req: The Shah's Embroidered Pants (Biff Rose)

22 Oct 99 - 08:38 PM (#126992)
Subject: The Shah's Pants
From: Hutzul

The old Midnight Special radio program on WFMT in Chicago used to play a recording:

The Prime Minister to Persia Was a gentleman of France Very much in love with the Shah's pants . . .

It was more recitation than song, and very funny. Does anyone know who recorded it and if it's available? (I have all the words)

Thanks - this site is the most fun. I've filled in tons of blank spots in my song book from all of you.

22 Oct 99 - 11:15 PM (#127059)
Subject: RE: The Shah's Pants
From: _gargoyle

My mother was a woman .... that could spawn children ....only as peculiar as me.

When our family had dwindled to "less than full table" at November's Thanksgiving she searched the campus's for those who were able....to fill places....

One of them...from Iran/Persia told wonderful, fabulous stories....of days before "Shah" when his fathe and he owned seven villages....now reduced by law to three...(villagers... that wove carpets... for the cats to wipe mud on)....I wonder what became of SAM?

22 Oct 99 - 11:51 PM (#127080)
Subject: RE: The Shah's Pants
From: DonMeixner

Hutzul,

The prime minisrere to Persia was a gentleman from France, Pretty much in love with the Sha's pants, The ones he wore on grand state occasions when he sat upon the throne, And the minister often longed to have them for his very own.

Is this one you are looking for? Its on a live Biff Rose recording which I have and I'll search it for you sometime on the week end.

Don

22 Oct 99 - 11:59 PM (#127084)
Subject: RE: The Shah's Pants
From: Hutzul

Don

Thanks! As soon as I read "Biff Rose" I knew I knew that. Any further info on the album will be appreciated. I'll try surfing around to see if one is available for sale.

23 Oct 99 - 12:04 AM (#127089)
Subject: RE: The Shah's Pants
From: Tom on Comfort

"And he numbers in his offspring no other sons of britches" (or something like that)

Yea! I'd love to get the words to that, so would at least one friend of mine.

--Tom

23 Oct 99 - 12:06 AM (#127091)
Subject: RE: The Shah's Pants
From: lamarca

"Biff Rose"! A name out of my foolish youth, when my parents bought "The Thorn in Mrs. Rose's Side". His song "Molly"
    When I was a young man, I ran away from home and went to join the circus
    I went to join the cotton candy world and make me lots of money, On my own
    For Molly, ah, my pretty Molly, well, she's waiting all alone
    Someday soon I will return to her...

still makes me sniffle sentimentally. Where did he come from, and whatever became of him?

23 Oct 99 - 12:25 AM (#127095)
Subject: RE: The Shah's Pants
From: DonMeixner

I think I have all of his albums, he was a favorte of mine. Even John Denver recorded "Molly" which is a truly beautiful, sad song. Just Like a Man has the same, sad power as molly.

Don

23 Oct 99 - 12:46 AM (#127098)
Subject: Lyr Add: THE SHAH'S EMBROIDERED PANTS (Biff Rose)
From: Hutzul

Here Goes Pardon any typos.

(How come I can't get line breaks when I send?)

The Prime Minister to Persia was a gentleman of France
Very much in love with the Shah's pants,
Which he wore on grand state occasions as he sat upon the throne.
The minister would often long to have them for his own.
(I want those pants)

Especially intriguing were the jewels and the laces
With which they were embellished in the most strategic places.
No scarcity of fabric, no paucity of pleat
Disturbed the tranquil comfort of the chubby royal seat

Sections in this area were conveniently designed
For scratching any area the Shah might have in mind.
It happened Sunday evening when the Shah was at his prayers.
The ladies of the harem all were languishing upstairs.

The minister, quite pissed off at his ill-concealed desire
To add those jewelled treasures to his personal attire,
Made hasty preparation to return at once to France
And boldly sought the Shah's boudoir and swiped the royal pants.

Once in his grasp he found happiness complete
Pressed them to his bosom, kissed the jewelled seat
He fondled every ornament, he petted every gem
He gazed in rapture at each pleat and buttonhole and hem.

Finally tearing off his own, he thrust his shanks
In trouser legs, each one of which was worth a million francs.
The minister stood staring at the mirror on the wall
In bliss so overwhelming he couldn't speak at all.

Never had his front, or rear, his ass or knee
Known any glory anywhere equivalent to these.
With a moan of sweet content he fell into a trance
Stoned on the vibrations of those psychedelic pants.

Just then a lovely haremite, a favorite of the Shah
Came seeking through the hallways for her marital papa.
As she passed his sleeping room she gave a hasty glance
Detecting not the minister, but only jewelled pants

And in her girlish innocence she murmured, "King of Kings,
I can't resist you when I see you in 'dem t'ings.'"
Rushing in she threw herself in passionate desire
On them glowing trousers that resembled coals of fire.

"Oh, mighty Shah" she shyly said, "Oh, high and mighty Shah
You certainly improved since last you been to my boudoir".
Struggling from his fond embrace although the light was dim
She recognized her sad mistake and screamed "It ain't him!"

Today there sits upon the throne a youth of handsome mien
About whose features something reminiscent may be seen.
A product not of sin and not romance
But one who owed something to a pair of jewelled pants

The minister thereafter left his head upon the block
The Shah now keeps his trousers in a strong box under lock.
The favorite of the harem is replete with years and riches
And numbers in her offspring no other sons of britches.