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20 Jul 14 - 07:32 PM (#3643720) Subject: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Jack the Sailor I have an idea for a small home business based upon information gleaned from another unnamed thread. I get a goat which eats the poison ivy around my property. I put an ad in craigs list. Have your fortune read by a goat turd reader. I ask the person you bring a person to bring a personal item. (Apparently goats will eat nearly anything.) and once it passed through the goat I put on a silk robe an turban and read the scat patterns for predictive patterns and indications of future fortune. To be frank, I am doing this to get around the prohibition against livestock in the city limits. If I make the goat managing partner, I think I have that covered. I don't really see any flaws in this plan. Would you all give me feedback please. Breed of goat for coastal North Carolina, size and sex of goat and of course the name are all things which require consideration. Thanks in advance for your help. The goat turd diviner |
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20 Jul 14 - 08:11 PM (#3643731) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: John on the Sunset Coast Save your money, Jack! That joke died about 24 hours ago, and it wasn't very funny then. |
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20 Jul 14 - 08:17 PM (#3643733) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Bill D Like a Haruspex, only you don't have to kill the goat.... sounds good-- count me in for, oh...$00.25 |
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20 Jul 14 - 08:24 PM (#3643734) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: John on the Sunset Coast A fool and his money are soon parted, to coin a phrase. |
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20 Jul 14 - 08:36 PM (#3643736) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Rapparee I'll put in my two cents worth. |
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20 Jul 14 - 08:42 PM (#3643738) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: John on the Sunset Coast A fool and his money are soon parted, to coin a phrase. |
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20 Jul 14 - 09:18 PM (#3643746) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: GUEST,# Best idea from you yet, Jack |
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20 Jul 14 - 09:38 PM (#3643748) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Ebbie Taking this seriously - my advice is to get a wether )neutered male, so no odors). They make good pets, eat all the brush that you want to get rid of (and maybe a little of what you wanted to save); they are playful and affectionate and come when called. What more could one ask? |
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20 Jul 14 - 10:31 PM (#3643753) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Janie Ebbie, housebroken or litter box trained? |
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20 Jul 14 - 10:57 PM (#3643757) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: GUEST,Guest from Sanity Run for political office!!...Political ideologues will believe just about anything, if you package it well enough...shit, you don't even have to package it...just spin it...make it something it's not!!...tell them it's in the genes of the goat!! Make up a discrimination conflict between Saanans and Nubians (types of goats), exaggerate it, and offer a resolution, make everyone incensed about it, when before nobody even knew about it or could care less!....Then argue about it on Mudcat!!....and call those who don't 'get it' sheep! GfS |
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20 Jul 14 - 11:28 PM (#3643758) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Stilly River Sage . . . conflict between Saanans and Nubians . . . I'm glad you clarified that they're types of goats. |
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21 Jul 14 - 10:08 AM (#3643851) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: GUEST,leeneia Jack, you haven't brought Margaret Thatcher into it yet. Gotta have Margaret Thatcher. |
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21 Jul 14 - 10:28 AM (#3643860) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Ed T Much like Irelands St. Pat, you could be revered by the international goat community, Jack. Nice to see you regained your mudcat land legs. |
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21 Jul 14 - 12:03 PM (#3643902) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Mrrzy What a great way to fleece the gullible! |
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21 Jul 14 - 12:47 PM (#3643911) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Don Firth Profitable goats? There are outfits around the country (I've seen a local outfit advertised on television) that, if you have an overgrown yard, you can hire them to bring over their flock of goats who will then go to work cleaning, pruning, and generally reducing the appearance of jungle so you can then go in with the lawn mower and hedge clippers and neaten up. The goats don't do topiary….. There are highway departments around the country that periodically turn flocks of goats loose on overgrown median strips and embankments along highways and freeways to control weeds, prune, and mow when the growth gets too heavy. Also saves the cost of buying feed for the goats. Don Firth |
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21 Jul 14 - 02:34 PM (#3643927) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: John on the Sunset Coast Sheep do the same thing, and one gets the bonus of lots of wool; too, they are lots less smelly than goats, and taste better should the need arise. Heck, sheep are practically a real life version of the Shmoo. |
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21 Jul 14 - 04:14 PM (#3643953) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Don Firth Not my field, but I read somewhere that with grass and grass-like plants, sheep tend to bite it through, whereas goats tend to clamp their teeth onto it and pull it up by the roots. So goat pruning tends to last longer. I dunno, though. Not my area of expertise…. Don Firth P. S. Sheep probably make better pets. But there is a sort of whimsically humorous side to goats. |
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21 Jul 14 - 06:57 PM (#3643995) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: GUEST Verily, I offer thee a groat |
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21 Jul 14 - 11:39 PM (#3644035) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Mrrzy Nobody even groaned? |
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22 Jul 14 - 12:14 AM (#3644038) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: LadyJean There are rent a goat services, that will bring a truckload of the critters to eat your poison ivy, or kudzu, they love kudzu. I don't think that grows in Newfoundland. Goats are highly intelligent, remarkably fragrant creatures. You should keep that in mind, if you decide you need to own one. |
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22 Jul 14 - 05:41 AM (#3644090) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Musket Threads such as this get my goat... I reckon I'll tether it to the boot of Jack's car. err.. auto. err.. trunk. |
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22 Jul 14 - 06:20 AM (#3644099) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Ed T goat poop |
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22 Jul 14 - 07:26 AM (#3644125) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: GUEST,big al whittle chacun a son goat |
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22 Jul 14 - 07:47 AM (#3644134) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Ed T à chacun son goût? (I excuse your French) |
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22 Jul 14 - 08:21 AM (#3644145) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: freda underhill The young couple invited their elderly pastor for Sunday dinner. While they were in the kitchen preparing the meal, the minister asked their son what they were having. "Goat," the little boy replied. "Goat?" replied the startled man of the cloth, "Are you sure about that?" "Yep," said the youngster. "I heard Dad say to Mom, 'Today is just as good as any to have the old goat for dinner.' |
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22 Jul 14 - 11:19 AM (#3644204) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Jim Carroll When I said I fancied a little butter I meant this not this Jim Carroll |
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23 Jul 14 - 12:23 AM (#3644412) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: LadyJean Friends who had goats decided to sell their flock. A retired pastor thought they'e make a nice hobby, until he came to see them and the billy goat tried to mate with his leg. A male goat will try to mate with just about anything. They also urinate on their beards to attract female goats. |
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23 Jul 14 - 08:25 AM (#3644512) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Jack the Sailor Thanks for all the advice on goat husbandry. (no pun intended) I have penciled this in on the top of my list "nubian neuter" If I got a female do you think that the poison ivy and personal belongings would taint the milk? No one has yet suggested a name. If it were a mule or a braying jackass I could name it after a one or two of the people who come to this site. But I have no good thoughts on prophetic goat names. Goatoracle? See? I just don'y have it in me. OK people have made lots of money on stupider, sillier ideas, so don't rain on my parade John. OK? Keep the feed back coming folks. I am taking notes. |
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23 Jul 14 - 08:28 AM (#3644515) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Jack the Sailor And yes, there are kudzu removal services here in the southern US that employ goats. I am not yet ready to deploy on that scale. |
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23 Jul 14 - 09:15 AM (#3644529) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Musket Err.. Before you buy a goat, google a picture or two of a mule or jackass. I'd hate to see you get your animals wrong and buy a siberian hamster... Jackass is a good name, all the same. I was just saying earlier to my mate Jackarse... |
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23 Jul 14 - 12:54 PM (#3644612) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Mrrzy There is a "goatbusters" here that will hire you goats to deal with landscaping issues. Love the idea, myself. Apparently it only takes 2 or 3 times to teach them what to eat and what to leave alone, and after that you can have the goats just wander over with their dog colleague, and they leave when they're done and wander to the next customers'. I think the dog is for people not to bother them. |
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23 Jul 14 - 03:54 PM (#3644672) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: John on the Sunset Coast Jack, if I had rain in California, I certainly wouldn't use it for your parade. Ignore my advice at your peril; laugh at me if you make a million. |
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23 Jul 14 - 04:06 PM (#3644673) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: Ed T Does this thread have the religious,anti- homosexuality, middle East conflict, anti virus programed in and updated? If not, beware of the invasion of the Borg-like, mudcat thread goats. |
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23 Jul 14 - 11:58 PM (#3644749) Subject: RE: BS: Prophetic Goating From: LadyJean My sister namned one of her goats after her partner's ex, whom he did rather resemble. |