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02 Apr 05 - 03:41 PM (#1450278) Subject: Lyr Add: MAXWELL'S SILVER HAMMER (Lennon/McCartney From: GUEST Bang! Bang! went Carmelengo Eduardo's hammer...the bells are ringing...sede vacante Joan was quizzical, studied pataphysical Science in the home Late nights all alone with her a test tube, oh, oh, oh, oh Maxwell Edison, majoring in medicine Calls her on the phone "Can I take you out to the pictures, Jo-o-o-oan?" But as she's getting ready to go A knock comes on the door Bang! Bang! Maxwell's silver hammer came down upon her head Clang! Clang! Maxwell's silver hammer made sure that she was dead Back in school again Maxwell plays the fool again Teacher gets annoyed Wishing to avoid an unpleasant scene-e-e-ene She tells Max to stay when the class has gone away So he waits behind Writing fifty times "I must not be so-o-o-o But when she turns her back on the boy He creeps up from behind Bang! Bang! Maxwell's silver hammer came down upon her head Clang! Clang! Maxwell's silver hammer made sure that she was dead P.C. Thirty-One said "We've caught a dirty one" Maxwell stands alone Painting testimonial pictures, oh, oh, oh, oh Rose and Valerie screaming from the gallery Say he must go free The judge does not agree, and he tells them so-o-o-o But, as the words are leaving his lips A noise comes from behind Bang! Bang! Maxwell's silver hammer came down upon his head Clang! Clang! Maxwell's silver hammer made sure that he was dead Silver hammer man |
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02 Apr 05 - 03:48 PM (#1450284) Subject: RE: BS: Maxwell's Silver Hammer Comes Down From: wysiwyg Very clever. You must be referring to the old custom of the Vatican Chamberlain rapping a dead pope on the forehead three times with a silver mallet, to see if he's really dead before making it "official." But I heard they don't do this anymore. ~S~ |
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02 Apr 05 - 03:55 PM (#1450288) Subject: RE: BS: Maxwell's Silver Hammer Comes Down From: GUEST Susan, 'twas done, just, by the carmelengo, Cardinal Eduardo Martinez Somalo. Now, if you would all take out your copies of the Ordo Exsequiarum Romani Pontificis, we'll get this Novemdiales rockin'! And you can place yer Next Pope bets here. |
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02 Apr 05 - 03:57 PM (#1450291) Subject: RE: BS: Maxwell's Silver Hammer Comes Down From: wysiwyg I heard him declare if official, but I heard it was determined by calling the deceased's given name (Karol) 3 times instead of smacking him. No? ~S~ |
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02 Apr 05 - 04:04 PM (#1450295) Subject: RE: BS: Maxwell's Silver Hammer Comes Down From: GUEST Nope, that would be while he was smacking him. For your consideration...handicapping yer bets. |
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02 Apr 05 - 04:24 PM (#1450308) Subject: RE: BS: Maxwell's Silver Hammer Comes Down From: GUEST,#2 The hammering was stopped in the 1960s. 1963 me thinks. |
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02 Apr 05 - 04:33 PM (#1450317) Subject: RE: BS: Maxwell's Silver Hammer Comes Down From: GUEST So here is what is going down right now. The pope's been bopped on the head three times, and Eduardo's got the Fisherman's Ring (to be destroyed once the cardinals start rockin' the conclave). JP's prefect of the papal household notifies the Dean of the College of Cardinals of the death, Dean tells cardinals, etc on down the hierarchy line. Of course, we already know that because of the media. Once a cardinal gets the news, they head on down the road to Vatican City. Meanwhile, back in the papal household...the College of Cardinals get down to the planning of the funeral, which is dictated by the Supreme Pontiff's Apostolic Constitution Universi Dominci Gregis, which is sorta like a papal will, except it is dictated more by papal tradition than the wishes of the individual pope. Then, after the body is washed and dressed in the papal vestments, two layers of white silk are placed over his head and hands, the body is placed in a cypress coffin, and then that coffin is encased in two more coffins. The second coffin is made of lead & engraved with his name and dates of his pontificate. Then that is put in an unadorned coffin of elm. Then the coffin(s) are taken to the Basilica to lie in state, so the faithful can come by to pray for repose of his soul. JP has ordered that he, in keeping with tradition, be buried within 4-6 days after his death. He will be buried along with lots of other popes, in the tombs underneath the Basilica. Mind you, this is the extreme shorthand version of what happens. You don't have to take a stupid anon guest's word for it. You can go straight to the source and read the Universi Dominci Gregis your own bad self. If you are so inclined, and easily amused. |
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02 Apr 05 - 04:48 PM (#1450323) Subject: RE: BS: Maxwell's Silver Hammer Comes Down From: wysiwyg So the cardinals are singin' "ease on down the road" and "keep truckin'"? Kewl! ~S~ |
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02 Apr 05 - 04:55 PM (#1450326) Subject: RE: BS: Maxwell's Silver Hammer Comes Down From: GUEST Oops. Forgot to mention, the coffin goes first to the Sistine Chapel for a metaphoric recognition of the passing of the torch, before it goes to the Basilica. The Sistine Chapel is where the conclave will be held after the funerals. I know it is being reported that the silver hammer ritual was discontinued by John XXIII, and that it is not included in JP's Universi Dominci Gregis. However, rumor in certain Catholic circles has it, that it would be done. |
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02 Apr 05 - 04:57 PM (#1450328) Subject: RE: BS: Maxwell's Silver Hammer Comes Down From: wysiwyg Well then ya got the title wrong-- Eddie's Silver Hammer, innit? ~S~ |
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02 Apr 05 - 05:38 PM (#1450349) Subject: RE: BS: Maxwell's Silver Hammer Comes Down From: Snuffy But John Lennon didn't know it would be Eddie, did he? |
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03 Apr 05 - 12:07 AM (#1450613) Subject: RE: BS: Maxwell's Silver Hammer Comes Down From: GUEST Ah... That would be Paul that wrote that song, Mr. Rocket Scientist. |