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BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?

03 Aug 05 - 03:42 PM (#1534144)
Subject: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: GUEST,Mrs Olive Whatnoll

Well, I fink they are! Me 'usband Eddie 'as bought some wot is striped red and white like a barber pole! I laughed when I sawr 'em! Wot a sight! In the past 'e 'as bought other fancy condoms, such as...

Mint-flavoured. They come in spearmint, doublemint, and some other kind wot I don't recall. I find spearmint are a bit of all right, but I detest doublemint!

Glow in the dark condoms! You can get these in bright red, orange, and lime green. The effect, though, is lost unless you turn out the lights and then you carn't see much else, so I fink it's really a stupid idea.

Them kind wot 'ave lit'tle fingies stickin' out all over like the French tickler variety. Well, I fink it's stupid! The French can 'ave 'em as far as I'm concerned.

Me point is, no real man needs these kind of bloody stupid accessories, does 'e? Not if 'e's a real man. I am finking of sendin' me Eddie for counselling since 'e most lack confidence or somefink. Otherwise 'e would not waste 'is money on such silly fings, would 'e?

Well? Wot do you fink?

Olive Whatnoll


03 Aug 05 - 04:13 PM (#1534168)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: Ebbie

I think it's time you took another vacation, Ms. Olive


03 Aug 05 - 04:20 PM (#1534173)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: Amos

Oi'm sure yer roight, Ma'a'm, an' Oi hereby undertake never to approach you wiv no striped or flavoured condoms, nor none with knobs on, as long as I live.

A


03 Aug 05 - 04:20 PM (#1534174)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: Little Hawk

Trying to outdo jOhn from Hull in the silly thread department, are you, Mrs Whatnoll? ;-)


03 Aug 05 - 04:52 PM (#1534190)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: jacqui.c

I've always understood that the glow in the dark bit was caused by radiation.

I can't see that any man really wants to put one of those on his willy.....

:>)


03 Aug 05 - 05:30 PM (#1534226)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: Clinton Hammond

I think the way you post is a stupid idea...


03 Aug 05 - 05:42 PM (#1534244)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: Deckman

I think I got the wrong phone number! Bob


03 Aug 05 - 05:45 PM (#1534247)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: Bill D

are rhetorical questions ruining society?


03 Aug 05 - 05:51 PM (#1534263)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: Peace

LOL


03 Aug 05 - 06:30 PM (#1534337)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: The Fooles Troupe

... only if you put them on your head...


03 Aug 05 - 07:28 PM (#1534398)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: Bunnahabhain

This matter clearly needs extesive, nay, exaustive investigation. A number of couples will be volunteered to compare and contrast plain and fancy, and will report back at some point.

Right, so who feels like organising it? Where's the next Mudgathering?


03 Aug 05 - 07:43 PM (#1534415)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: Amos

Here Pickles Redux for yer entertainment.

And here's the original Incandescent Pickle from the first extension to the first Song Challenge. It has been recorded by none other than Bert himself!!

A


03 Aug 05 - 07:43 PM (#1534418)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: Bee-dubya-ell

They've never made much sense to me, Olive. Why spend extra for special colors when the reason for having a condom in the first place is to put it someplace where it won't be seen?

By the way, I like your posts and I think those who have complained about your posting style should see a doctor about having the cockleburs removed from their arseholes.


03 Aug 05 - 07:47 PM (#1534419)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: wysiwyg

Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea? / Fastest 100 posts EVER!!!

~S~


03 Aug 05 - 08:24 PM (#1534523)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: Liz the Squeak

I could never understand why flavoured.....

LTS


03 Aug 05 - 08:26 PM (#1534525)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: GUEST

Duh. For cocksuckers.


03 Aug 05 - 08:39 PM (#1534533)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: JohnInKansas

Fancy condoms have no functional use in which the "fancy" part does anything special (a few really bizarre exceptions being admitted), however they may be of some benefit to couples who have not reached a fully developed and satisfying level of activity. By providing "something to talk about" (the condom) that is closely related to the desired act but isn't really "it" itself, they are often produced by the partner who really wants "something more" but doesn't quite know how to ask - or perhaps doesn't fully understand what to ask for.

Mrs. Olive should not be overly concerned at the introduction of such "novelties" but should perhaps take some extra care in considering whether he may be seeking a way to ask for "novelties" of another sort because he has failed to find all that he wants. He may also be expressing a feeling that he has not fully provided for her satisfaction - and the novelty condom may be a way of suggesting that she should be more free to communicate her desires.

It should be noted that some people do enjoy talking about a subject of interest, even when they really have nothing in particular to say. Novelties of this sort are more "conversation pieces" than useful devices.

Since they seldom actually "do" anything, these are one of the "mostly harmless" frivolities readily available.

Or he may be just a bit of a nut - which usually is mostly harmless.

John


03 Aug 05 - 09:02 PM (#1534541)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: GUEST,Desdemona

Well, all *I* can say is that the first time I saw "prawn curry" condoms for sale in a ladies' room, I couldn't help buying a half dozen for my girlfriends to laugh at!

So I guess the manufacturers must at least be turning a profit, eh?

~D.


04 Aug 05 - 04:06 AM (#1534645)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: Liz the Squeak

I was under the impression that if you were laughing at the colour/flavour/size/unusual shape of the condom then you would be distracted from the colour/flavour/size/unusual shape of the willy it was supposed to be covering.... past experience has shown me that the flashest advertising conceals the dullest of products.

LTS


04 Aug 05 - 05:44 AM (#1534675)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: GUEST

I would be worried about putting something curry flavoured - possible containing the same chemicals as curry - in such a sensitive area.


04 Aug 05 - 05:46 AM (#1534679)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: s&r

Luminous condoms - you can see what's coming...

Stu


04 Aug 05 - 05:58 AM (#1534685)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: The Fooles Troupe

Bee-dubya-ell: 03 Aug 05 - 07:43 PM

"They've never made much sense to me, Olive. Why spend extra for special colors when the reason for having a condom in the first place is to put it someplace where it won't be seen?"

Ah, you misunderstand... They are NOT for that purpose, but for putting it someplace where it CAN be seen...


Liz the Squeak: 03 Aug 05 - 08:24 PM

"I could never understand why flavoured....."


... and tasted...


You guys have led such dull straight lives...

Sigh!....


04 Aug 05 - 08:12 AM (#1534738)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: GUEST,Mrs Olive Whatnoll

Cor! This 'as been quite enlightenin', to me surprise. Per'aps me Eddie is just tryin' to be entertainin'?

As for you, Clinton Hammond, you can bloody well sod off, you stupid git! I've met incontinent parrots wot 'ad more charm than you do.

- Olive Whatnoll


04 Aug 05 - 09:48 AM (#1534835)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: Peter T.

It is still bizarre to me that given technological innovations in plastics, that condom companies still continue to put out these crappy condoms, hardly better than stuff you could buy in 1960 (bells and whistles notwithstanding). The best condoms are still absurdly user-unfriendly.

yours,

Peter T.


04 Aug 05 - 12:01 PM (#1534907)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: Little Hawk

Specially the ones with the cayenne pepper in them.


04 Aug 05 - 12:42 PM (#1534926)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: jacqui.c

LOL!


04 Aug 05 - 12:51 PM (#1534933)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: GUEST,Frug

On a more serious note.......condoms are very important in sexual health not just as a contraceptive device but also to prevent the spread of Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs). If by adding a bit of fun they become more attractive especially for younger people then great. Word of warning though, some of the glow in the dark and other novelty condoms do carry a warning that they are not a good form of contraception and may have limited ability to prevent an STI. Always check the wrapper.
Damn there I go again and I'm supposed to be on leave.

Frank


04 Aug 05 - 12:52 PM (#1534934)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: MMario

of course Frug - that is true of MOST condoms if not used with other preventatives; still - something is better then nothing, yes?


04 Aug 05 - 01:00 PM (#1534941)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: GUEST,daylia

All condoms are a stupid idea, fancy or not. Why? Well...

1. They interfere with spontaneous hedonism. And there's nothing more pleasing than an occasional bout of spontaneous hedonism!

2. They rip and tear and fall off more often than not, and usually at the most inopportune moments. In other words - THEY DON'T WORK very well at all!

3. Using 'em is about as much fun, and effective, as taking a shower in your raincoat and hipwaders.

4. When teenage folk in parked cars are through with them, they inevitably throw them on the ground (so Mama will never know). This makes for the most unpleasant sight next morning. People out walking hafta make wide circles around them for months, if not years on end. There's been one on the ground at the baseball park for about 2 years now - no-one will pick it up! The pretty pink stripes have faded and the ribbs are all busted, but it's still intact. Bubbly too.

It's quite the challenge explaining these things to curious young children. (Wherever did you find that disgusting thing??? No it's NOT a balloon! DROP IT ... hey, GET IT OUT OF YOUR MOUTH RIGHT NOW! ;-)

And when innocent endangered birds and animals mistake them for limp deflated worms or snakes, they choke. And croak. Now I ask you ... is THAT fair?????

I've said my peace. ANd now I'm going to get some. TTYL


04 Aug 05 - 01:00 PM (#1534942)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: GUEST,Frug

True MMario. Saw a recent study which suggested that a significant proportion of young women who only use condoms as a form of contraception will get pregnant within 3 years.


05 Aug 05 - 03:19 PM (#1535860)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: fat B****rd

In my day glowing condoms were for dim f...ers.


05 Aug 05 - 03:37 PM (#1535874)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: GUEST,Kim C no cookie

Yes.


06 Aug 05 - 08:29 AM (#1536311)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: Mrs.Duck

I don't fancy condoms at all - can't stand the feel, taste or smell of rubber no matter what colour or flavour they try to disguise it with!


06 Aug 05 - 10:56 AM (#1536397)
Subject: RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea?
From: LilyFestre

"All condoms are a stupid idea, fancy or not. Why? Well...

1. They interfere with spontaneous hedonism. And there's nothing more pleasing than an occasional bout of spontaneous hedonism!"


LOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think I like this explanation the best of all!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!


Michelle