To Thread - Forum Home

The Mudcat Café TM
https://mudcat.org/thread.cfm?threadid=87978
35 messages

BS: Would you care for coffee?

11 Jan 06 - 09:18 PM (#1646705)
Subject: BS: Would you care for a little coffee?
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I was asked by a waitress in a restaurant (as if one would find a waitress anywhere else) if I would care for a little coffee. I told her that I was sorry, but I wouldn't be able to. I already have enough responsibilities. Adding caring for a little coffee on top of all the other things I have to care for - a wife, a business, several cats, a house in perpetual need of repairs - would just be too much. I would be afraid that instead of properly caring for the little coffee I would neglect it. There's a big commitment that goes along with caring for something and I just don't know if I could make that commitment to a coffee, little or otherwise.

I was curious as to why the little coffee needed caring for in the first place. Was it an orphan? Did the big coffees that are supposed to take care of little coffees run off? Or did they, perhaps, meet with foul play?

It's not that I didn't feel sorry for the little coffee, it's just that I have no idea how one would go about caring for it. Is one supposed to to keep a little coffee warm and cozy to make sure it doesn't catch a cold? And if it gets sick, where do you find a coffee doctor?

And anyway, if one agrees to care for a little coffee it probably won't be long before one is also caring for a little cream, and then a little sugar. It just becomes an unending cycle.

So, I hope nobody thinks it unkind of me, but I think I'll let other people care for all the little coffees that need caring for. I've got enough to care about already.


11 Jan 06 - 09:20 PM (#1646708)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Peace

Well then, would you care for a little spatula?


11 Jan 06 - 09:31 PM (#1646715)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: GUEST

...would you cough for a little cary?


11 Jan 06 - 09:43 PM (#1646726)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: CapriUni

Thanks for the laugh, BWL, I was feeling in need of one.

[_]D


11 Jan 06 - 09:56 PM (#1646737)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Q (Frank Staplin)

I know I have asked friends many times if they would care for a drink. Very few refusals! Truly caring souls.
Never thought about that expression until you brought it up. Looked it up in J. E. Lighter's magnum opus, "Historical Dictionary of American Slang," and zilch.

Anyone know who started it?
From a couple of quotations in the OED, it looks like it could be old, but none exactly like it.

(The Oxford Dictionary does have the phrase, "I couldn't care less," which has been discussed in another thread.)


11 Jan 06 - 10:14 PM (#1646744)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: John O'L

When I was younger & fitter I cared for a dance from time to time, and if I do say so myself, I cared a great deal for them and they were better off for my having done so, but lately, I dunno, I seem to care more now for a seat at the bar. (And they do well out of me too I might care to add.)


12 Jan 06 - 05:23 AM (#1646873)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Morticia

I'll care for your coffee for you......in fact, I love the little fellows so much, I think I'll become the adoptive parent of any little orphan coffees anyone would like to foster out.......come to Mama, little coffee( mwhahahaha)


12 Jan 06 - 05:32 AM (#1646882)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: GUEST

It's from the English language, not the American.


12 Jan 06 - 05:45 AM (#1646885)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: David C. Carter

Is this a carefree thread?


Carefree Fred


12 Jan 06 - 09:04 AM (#1646956)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Liz the Squeak

I don't care for coffee... but I do have a coff, is that similar?

LTS


12 Jan 06 - 09:14 AM (#1646964)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Rapparee

Well, Liz, if you have a coff you are obviously a coffer and not a coffee. You could keep the coffee in a coffer if you'd like to do so, but it might suffocate and then you'd be a coffer with a coffee in a coffer coffin...and if the coffee coffer coffin was copper, you could have be a coffer with a coffee in a copper coffer coffin. Evenutally the cops would come and communicate with you, the coffer with the coffee in a copper coffee coffer coffin.

And who knows where that might lead? You could be held incommunicado, treated as some sort of crazy criminal, and hauled into court as the incommunicado crazy criminal coffer with the copper coffee coffer coffin.

Can't you see the headlines now?


12 Jan 06 - 09:19 AM (#1646969)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Amos

The U.N. would surely want to intercede. Kofi Cures Qualms of Cougher with Coffee Coffer Coffin, Critter Quits Coughing....


A


12 Jan 06 - 09:21 AM (#1646972)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Liz the Squeak

Would it be easier if I just said I had bronchitis?


LTS


12 Jan 06 - 09:25 AM (#1646980)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Rapparee

No. Bronchitis would take real brass, and that would involve the military higher-ups. It might settle in your lungs, too, and the brass with brass might take umbrage with bronchitis in the breast. Especially if you ride a bicycle or wear a bra or went to Brazenose. Don't do it.


12 Jan 06 - 09:34 AM (#1646987)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Liz the Squeak

Bugger.... can I change it to pnuemonia then?

LTS


12 Jan 06 - 09:57 AM (#1647002)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffiene?
From: Severn

If you want to aviod bronchitis, stay the buck away from those bucking rodeo horses. Or if back East in NYC the USA, avoid The Bronx entirely (good Irish music to be found in the South Bronx if you know where to look, though, rough as the neighborhood is).

Pneumonia or Old Monia, Pleuresy or just plain old Mono, it would be wise to check out all the options. It's cold comfort, I know.

"....And when you awoke,
You were alone
This bird had Flu....."


But until it's all over, do we call you "Liz The Bark" or "Liz The Hack"?

....or a new coffeure might make your head feel better....


12 Jan 06 - 10:33 AM (#1647016)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Jeri

...and then the waitress said, "Well, sweetie, you don't hafta take it home. Here, just let it sit on yer lap for a while..."

Severn, you are a sick, sick man, and I expect you don't get invited to a lot of parties. Mind you, I thought it was good, but a Norwegian would.


12 Jan 06 - 11:58 AM (#1647043)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Rapparee

I'm not Norwegian, never have been. And I never get invited to parties, perhaps because of my non-penchant for bathing below my scalp follicles, so I wasn't there. Nonetheless it was a good party.


12 Jan 06 - 04:13 PM (#1647175)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: GUEST,The Little Coffee

You don't care for me
I don't care about that.


J. Hendrix


12 Jan 06 - 06:20 PM (#1647250)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: hilda fish

'caring' for a coffee, little or big, is so-o-o-o-o easy! Don't be frightened. To care for any coffee, little or big, just drink - oh, and enjoy. The enjoying part is the main part of caring for it. Then wait for the next one. All coffee's need caring but like anything, there is an end to them. The responsibility is over! Ahh...... life is good. I've cared for so many coffees in my life that I think I'm due for the coffee mother teresa award, or should I just award it to myself. Coffee's aren't around long enough to know.


12 Jan 06 - 07:03 PM (#1647287)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: annamill

It's too bad you weren't flying on TWA when she offered you a little coffee. Then you could have told her you preferred TWA tea!

Trraaa lllaaaa la laaa!

Love, Annamill (feelingsillyagain) I wonder if anyone will get this?


12 Jan 06 - 07:11 PM (#1647291)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Folkiedave

What I want is a proper cuppa coffee,
made in a proper copper coffee pot.
I may be off my dot but I want a cup of coffee
from a proper coffee pot,
Iron coffee pots and tin coffee pots,
they're no use to me (breathe)
If I can't have a proper cuppa cofee in a copper coffee pot
I'll have a cup of tea.

From the singing of John Foreman.

And if you can't fit in a breathe at the end of line 3 try a semi breathe


13 Jan 06 - 10:12 AM (#1647794)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Liz the Squeak

I think you missed a proper out of the last line there....

If I can't have a proper cup of coffee from a proper copper coffee pot, I'll have a cup of tea.

LTS


13 Jan 06 - 01:11 PM (#1647948)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Tannywheeler

Oi, weh! Thanks for the laughs, guys.             Tw(luv that song, BTW, but can't keep up at the end.)


13 Jan 06 - 08:02 PM (#1648266)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Big Al Whittle

as Ray Martine the comic used to say, and is probably still saying,
"You fer coffee.....?"
(you have to say it fast)


13 Jan 06 - 08:31 PM (#1648285)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Bill D

yes, annamill, I remember both TWA and the joke...but I am proud to say I avoided both of them most of the time..*grin*

(Now if a stewardess on Southwest Air had asked me that, I might have a different response)


13 Jan 06 - 08:52 PM (#1648294)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Sorry I've been away from this thread a couple of days. Just too many other things to care for...

Peace, I always care for spatulas! I care for them with tender loving care. There's a point at which I must draw the line and say "I don't care any more!" or "I used to care but times have changed"* but that point is never reached if there are spatulas involved.


* There is also a point at which I draw a very different line and say "Why must I be a teenager in love?", but that has absolutely nothing to do with this thread.


13 Jan 06 - 08:53 PM (#1648295)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Bee-dubya-ell

That's "I used to care but things have changed" isn't it? Oh well, that too.


14 Jan 06 - 08:51 PM (#1648615)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: David C. Carter

"I love coffee,I love tea,
I love the Java Jive,and it loves me".Didn't The Ink Spots brew that one up?
One more cup of coffee for the road.Now,who was it said that?I'll let you be in my beans,if I can be in yours.Who the fxxx said that?

Blind Lemon Starbucks


15 Jan 06 - 12:01 PM (#1648801)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Micca

I Must admit to having got a taste for French Vanilla in Maine at Sinsulls Post Getaway events and BOO HOO!! have nearly used up the supply I brought back!!


16 Jan 06 - 04:27 AM (#1649385)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: GUEST,Noddy

All this is good stuff but in the meantime "whats happened to the little cup of coffee"??
I worry so much about it I cant sleep .I wish I had a cup of...


16 Jan 06 - 07:46 AM (#1649438)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Mr Red

perhaps this is a diminution of our common (oh don't get me on that) language.

was she suggesting 'caring as a backform of "scaring"? I'm sure you could do that comfortably. It might relax you in a way!

There are grounds after all.........................


16 Jan 06 - 05:55 PM (#1649765)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Rustic Rebel

I care for them little coffee bean buggers right in the freezer.
When I think I should, I take them out for a good grinding. Pulverize to a fine grinding at that.
Take the ground remains and dump hot boiled water on top of them and consume at free will.
Anyone want to hire a well trained caregiver such as me?


16 Jan 06 - 10:03 PM (#1649929)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Rustic, you're suppose to give the little buggers a massage before you throw them into the grinder. It relaxes them and keeps them from tasting like adrenalin. Or, you can just give them a shot of Kahlua before grinding. Just don't tell them what it's made from.


17 Jan 06 - 05:18 AM (#1650070)
Subject: RE: BS: Would you care for coffee?
From: Liz the Squeak

Has anyone ever tried the coffee that civet cats poop out?

LTS