|
28 Jan 06 - 02:25 AM (#1656885) Subject: BS: Iraq Jack From: Mudcat Jack Ello all, I is on me travels again, I hitched a lift with Phot and wound up out ere in Iraq. It is supposed to be a desert out ere, but its dun nuffink but rain until today. Still dere's lots of stuff to play wiv ere, I got a ride in a tank the other nite, Phot was off videoing things, and runnin round wiv guns, so I wuz brave an looked after the tank, I think I should get a medal for dat. I found the bar the other night, it had a great palm tree........had.....I is hoping Joline and the Pups is OK, I fink dey is staying wiv Auntie LTS, but she aint written to me so I'm not sure, I'm getting Phot to get some pictures of me doin heroic stuff out here, and I wants a go wiv his camera, so I can do the reporting thing. More news soon, Jack |
|
28 Jan 06 - 02:32 AM (#1656887) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Peace Thanks for letting us know you both are doing OK. I'll keep the thread refreshed so's your friend here see it. Stay well. |
|
28 Jan 06 - 04:49 AM (#1656912) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: John MacKenzie So this is your handiwork then? I suppose the rations are too small for a big dog like you! Giok |
|
28 Jan 06 - 06:11 AM (#1656952) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Mudcat Jack Actually, I is just back from a light lunch,..BBUUURRRRRRPPPPPPPPPP! Its good scoff round here, I had curry last nite, Phot kept moaning about funny smells coming from my chair, but I told him it was der drains, I should know, he can't smell his bum like I can smell mine. I'm off down to see the kennel maid in a bit to see if I can get another beer card, more beer might cause my bum to pong a bit though. Cheers! Jasck |
|
28 Jan 06 - 06:16 AM (#1656955) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: pixieofdoom I'm not sure mixing with all these soldiers is improving his charm any......... |
|
28 Jan 06 - 06:25 AM (#1656964) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Peace LOL |
|
28 Jan 06 - 06:30 AM (#1656969) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Phot I'm not letting him drink tonight, he's coming down the gym with me! Thing is, out here its not just soldiers that are a bad influence, there's the RAF, and the RN too! I'm being good though,........Honest! Wassail!! Chris |
|
28 Jan 06 - 07:25 AM (#1656998) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: pixieofdoom I just hope Jack isn't teaching them any bad words! |
|
28 Jan 06 - 08:19 AM (#1657018) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: jacqui.c Just trying to imagine Jack in the gym! Doesn't seem quite his style. |
|
28 Jan 06 - 08:38 AM (#1657024) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: John MacKenzie He can't spell Jacqui, and he thinks it's short for Jemima, he has always fancied Imran's ex wife. Giok |
|
28 Jan 06 - 10:46 AM (#1657069) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: SINSULL Has he been neutered yet? |
|
28 Jan 06 - 11:12 AM (#1657083) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Alba Sins..shhhhhhhhhhhhhh...Phot has enough to content with (lol) Phot can you burn some essential oils... may help with the pong:) Jude |
|
28 Jan 06 - 03:19 PM (#1657218) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Catherine Jayne Jack I do hope you are behaving yourself out there. I can confirm....just to put you mind at rest, that Jolene and the pubs are staying with LTS. I have seen them today and they are settling into life in the wilds of East London well. They are all missing you loads and are asking the Goddess for your safe return. Behave yourself Love Aunty Khatt and Uncle Micca x |
|
28 Jan 06 - 04:36 PM (#1657267) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Liz the Squeak I would just like to state that I did not offer to put up with Jolene and the pups... they just moved back in.... and I'd only just got the carpet smelling right again. Don't think they're staying for the duration..... LTS |
|
28 Jan 06 - 04:46 PM (#1657271) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: SINSULL Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene! I'm begging of you please don't take my man. Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene! Please don't take him just because you can. Now it's a music thread. |
|
28 Jan 06 - 05:18 PM (#1657289) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: GUEST,Joleen Dont wurry ma darlin' Ahm tying a yeller gibbon round that oak tree fur ya, ma hunny. Should Ah be mekin youall a camelflaj jakit? Joleen |
|
29 Jan 06 - 09:55 AM (#1657341) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: pixieofdoom So that's where they are.......they ran off after a disagreement with one of my cats and I've not seen them since. I've been searching every strip club and seedy dive in Aldershot.....taken me two weeks so far and I'm only up to D |
|
29 Jan 06 - 06:16 PM (#1657542) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Liz the Squeak Funny, they seem to be getting on like a house afire with my kitties.. maybe they have better manners than yours! LTS |
|
30 Jan 06 - 10:38 AM (#1657732) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: pixieofdoom That probably wouldn't be difficult |
|
30 Jan 06 - 11:03 AM (#1657746) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: John MacKenzie Well Pixie I heard your tours of all those low joints [ankles?] in Aldershot were for the purposes of research, and that you were plannning to open a Morris and Pole Dancing dive called Bells and Baldricks. With Idris as the main attraction, just strutting around in those leather trousers that some female Mudcatters still dream about! Jolene I hear will be doing the dance of the Seven Army Surplus Blankets, complete with soft music and iron rations. It is no good denying it I have seen the business cards in phone boxes as far south as Basra. Giok |
|
30 Jan 06 - 04:00 PM (#1658025) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: ranger1 Jack, Henry says to mind your Ps and Qs, he hasn't got any contacts in Iraq to bail you out this time. And Mrs. Possum is considering suing you for child support... |
|
30 Jan 06 - 04:15 PM (#1658035) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: lady penelope Giok, it's no use you know, Pixie won't pay you any more money for putting cards in phone boxes than she already has........ |
|
03 Feb 06 - 05:49 AM (#1660889) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Phot Just back from a little three day jaunt around doing stuff, but I made the mistake of leaving Jack in charge of my accomodation. BIG mistake! The little sod has been having parties with the dog section, There's half eaten Bonio's and empty beer tins everywhere! That does it, next time he's coming too, and hes doing top cover from the snatch! Wassail!! Chris PS. Dust storm this morning, and now its pi**ing down with rain! I wish I was at home! |
|
03 Feb 06 - 08:21 AM (#1660946) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: freda underhill As I was coming down Conroy's Gap, I heard a maiden cry; 'There goes Bill the Bullocky, He's bound for Gundagai. A better poor old beggar Never earnt an honest crust, A better poor old beggar Never drug a whip through dust.' His team got bogged at the nine mile creek, Bill lashed and swore and cried; 'If Nobby don't get me out of this, I'll tattoo his bloody hide.' But Nobby strained and broke the yoke, And poked out the leader's eye; Then the dog sat on the Tucker Box Nine miles from Gundagai... I've done my share of shearing sheep, Of droving and all that; And bogged a bullock team as well, On a Murrumbidgee flat. I've seen the bullock stretch and strain And blink his bleary eye, And the dog sit on the tuckerbox Nine miles from Gundagai. I've been jilted, jarred and crossed in love, And sand-bagged in the dark, Till if a mountain fell on me, I'd treat it as a lark. It's when you've got your bullocks bogged, That's the time you flog and cry, And the dog sits on the tuckerbox Nine miles from Gundagai. We've all got our little troubles, In life's hard, thorny way. Some strike them in a motor car And others in a dray. But when your dog and bullocks strike, It ain't no apple pie, And the dog sat on the tuckerbox Nine miles from Gundagai. x freda |
|
03 Feb 06 - 08:44 AM (#1660957) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Snuffy Aren't there a few "h"s missing there, Freda? |
|
03 Feb 06 - 09:11 AM (#1660978) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Amos What a grand song, Freda! Whose is it? A |
|
03 Feb 06 - 09:42 AM (#1661001) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: freda underhill It was originally written by someone under the pen name 'Bowyang Yorke', Amos. It was a poem about the early pioneers of Australia, who went west and south from Sydney, looking for the source of the Murrumbidgee River. Many went to the area around Gundagai district in the period 1830-50. They were tough times with supplies being transported along bush tracks by bullock teams. To pass the time while often being bogged, or for the river level to fall at crossings such as Muttama Creek near Gundagai, 'bullockies' would recite doggerel and rhymes picked up on their travels - and, sometimes, even write a few lines. Often on such occasions the bullocky's dog would sit guarding its master's tuckerbox and possessions while he was away seeking help. The poem of 'The Dog on the Tuckerbox' was written some time in the 1850s. The original author used the pen name 'Bowyang Yorke', then the verse was amended some time later and promoted as a poem by Jack Moses. Jack O'Hagan put it to music in 1937. There is now a statue of the dog on the tuckerbox outside Gundagai ! (hope you enjoyed that Phot!) |
|
03 Feb 06 - 10:47 AM (#1661059) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Snuffy The (alleged) original version with the missing "h" is here in the DT NINE MILES FROM GUNDAGAI. That dog sounds more like the Jack I know |
|
03 Feb 06 - 11:28 AM (#1661094) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Amos Thanks, Freda. I have heard other tunes relating to travels to Gundegai. The name alone makes it sound exotic and curious. It is located at -35.069362 degrees latitude, 148.104117 degrees longitude, and about 745 feet altitude, shouuld anyone wish to visit. Here's a view from above (if it works). A |
|
05 Feb 06 - 02:13 AM (#1661941) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Mudcat Jack Ullo, it is me again. Phot has buggered off an left me alone again in the room, I is not avin any more parties for a bit coz Phot threw his teddy out of der cot after the last wun, still was a bloody good party though! I is missin Joline an der pups, coz it is a long way back home. You did say you wus makin me a a combat jacket love, could you urry up as I might be goin out wiv Phot next week, an last time I did, we wuz in a helecopter type fing, and you knows me an bein travel sick, I threw up all over Phots vidio camara. Dunno why he was upset though, I ate up all the lumpy bits! All he had to do wuz clean off der slime, his mate Griff got sum good piccys though, of me lookin all brave again, when we gets time we'll put them up on my site. More news soon, Jack |
|
05 Feb 06 - 05:38 AM (#1661998) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Liz the Squeak Jack - Jolene is in Ireland keeping an eye on Khatt and Micca, while the pups are with me. I will try to teach them some manners, but it's an uphill struggle. So far they haven't eaten anything they shouldn't have... but that's only because I don't leave the chocolate out overnight again and Limpit hides her curry down the back of the sofa. Glad to hear Phot is taking care of you.... would you like a parachute? LTS |
|
05 Feb 06 - 01:50 PM (#1662202) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Alba refresh |
|
07 Feb 06 - 05:10 AM (#1663586) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Phot The last thing that mad mutt needs is a parachute! What happens if he takes it into his head to jump out of a helecopter over Basra? Just imagine the chaos he could cause looking for a bar! Wassail!! Chris |
|
07 Feb 06 - 06:52 AM (#1663635) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: pixieofdoom It's the more the chaos he causes when he doesn't find one |
|
08 Feb 06 - 10:47 AM (#1664212) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Phot Batten down the hatches folks, someone in their infinite wisdom!??? Has invited Jack and myself to the officers mess tonight, for someones leaving party....Anyone know a good lawyer? Coz I think Jack is going to be tapping the boards tommrow! Wassail!! Chris PS. Its STILL raining out here! And you should have seen the thunder storm we had last night! So much for a bloody desert!! |
|
08 Feb 06 - 11:36 AM (#1664254) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: pixieofdoom They shouldn't invite him...............he's worser than vampires |
|
08 Feb 06 - 11:45 AM (#1664265) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Phot I'm just wondering what time in the morning he'll turn up this time, with what half empty bottle, how much half eaten pizza all over the floor, and just how much of the mess silver! Wassail!! Chris |
|
08 Feb 06 - 04:38 PM (#1664531) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: ranger1 One never knows where Jack is concerned... |
|
09 Feb 06 - 04:37 AM (#1665047) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Morticia half-empty bottle? That's not Jack you have there, it must be an imposter or an alium.Everyone knows Jack never leaves a drop. |
|
09 Feb 06 - 05:14 AM (#1665060) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: John MacKenzie Jack the alium? I bet he knows his onions! Nodding Wild Onion ? He's certainly wild!! G |
|
09 Feb 06 - 07:11 AM (#1665103) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Liz the Squeak I disagree... whilst staying with us he did leave a half empty bottle... mind you, it was Brasso..... Didn't do him any good but he had a lovely finish. LTS |
|
09 Feb 06 - 07:16 AM (#1665110) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: GUEST,catsPHiddle@work We've managed to stop Jolene drinking the meths but she is determind to get her trailer trash paws on my bottle of Feckin' Whiskey!! I will return her to The Squeaks and her puppies on Saturday!!! |
|
09 Feb 06 - 08:09 AM (#1665147) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Mrs.Duck Jack is the original weapon of miss destruction and should be kept as far from the snatch as possible!!! |
|
09 Feb 06 - 08:59 AM (#1665175) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Phot LOL Jane! A snatch is somthing I enjoy spending quite a lot of time in!! Out here a Snatch is an armoured Landrover, which comes in quite handy if some bugger is waving an AK 47 in your direction! Wassail!! Chris (Still giggling like a nutter!!) |
|
09 Feb 06 - 05:10 PM (#1665486) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Liz the Squeak Keep giggling Phot, maybe they'll send you home early with one of those nice back to front jackets..... LTS |
|
10 Feb 06 - 01:58 AM (#1665809) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Mudcat Jack I dunno why Phot is gigglin so much, has someone bin givin him stuff? I like Snatches too. Can't wait to get back to Joline..................It aint fair, she's in Ireland gettin pissed on whiskey wiv Auntie Khatt, an I is stuck here not gettin nuffink, dere aint even brasso out here. I is wonderin if Joline could smuggle herself out here, den we could get somthin together............Heh, heh, heh! I is off watching aeroplanes with Phot now, Bye! |
|
10 Feb 06 - 06:21 AM (#1665869) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: GUEST,Aunty Khatt Jack, Jolene is back and trying to sober up. We may have to put her into rehab for a couple of days to dry out but she will be fine. She is going to stay with the Squeak tomorrow and she will be reunited with the pups...and the cats....and Limpit. I'm sure she will feel better then. Now you behave yourself Jack and make sure you and Phot come back to us all in one piece...or in a back to front jacket! Aunty Khatt x |
|
10 Feb 06 - 07:03 AM (#1665888) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: The Fooles Troupe Thread Drift... My current older cat is called Squeak - her new companion - a half sister from her mum's next litter is called Bubbles viz : Bubble & Squeak... |
|
10 Feb 06 - 07:47 AM (#1665909) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Liz the Squeak WHAT?? More than one Squeak?? It's not allowed *I* am THE Squeak! The puppies had their first outing into the garden today.... they also had their first dunking in the pond. They've been drying out on the radiator since this morning... much like their mother is drying out at Chez Patterson (but probably without the duckweed)! LTS |
|
10 Feb 06 - 09:52 AM (#1666000) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Phot Hey Khatt, back to front jackets.........I'm not that kinky..................Well maybe!! Wassail!! Chris |
|
10 Feb 06 - 11:51 AM (#1666121) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Liz the Squeak You may be thinking of the jacket with the zippered holes and spangly straps..... Send me your measurements and I'll see what I can knock up..... LTS |
|
10 Feb 06 - 12:19 PM (#1666150) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: pixieofdoom Is that for Phot or for Jack? |
|
10 Feb 06 - 12:38 PM (#1666174) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Liz the Squeak Whatever...... : ) LTS |
|
11 Feb 06 - 07:21 AM (#1666728) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: The Fooles Troupe Actually, ther real cat names (every ca knows it's own real name!) are Spqueak & Bpubbles... as you know every cat has a silent 'p'.... |
|
11 Feb 06 - 05:37 PM (#1666877) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: Liz the Squeak Not my Raven... you can hear him rootling about in the litter tray for ages before he settles. LTS |
|
11 Feb 06 - 07:19 PM (#1666894) Subject: RE: BS: Iraq Jack From: The Fooles Troupe Well, the 'p' is still silent... :-) |