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THE PROFESSOR OF BRAY (M. Hammerton) Whrn in my jolly post-grad days My work went all to pieces, I took some other chap's results And so wrote up my thesis. But this is law, I will uphold And none may interfere, sir, That whatsoe'er the facts may be I'll further my career, sir. When my PhD was safe in hand Success became my passion, So I slipped off to the USA To learn the latest fashion. This golden rule, I swiftly learnt, And made my faithful practice Tell people what they want to hear To Hell with what the fact is. So in each Sunday supplement I called their wishes Knowledge And soon contrived to get myself A fellow of a college. A paperback I next supplied With trendy stuff unstinted; And subtly slipped the contrary In footnotes finely printed. My due reward in time arrived So I'm the proud possessor Of a chair, distinguished and renowned And the title of "professor." No thought of truth or facts shall e'er Constrain me or condition The books and papers that I write To further my ambition. @parody @college filename[ PROFBRAY TUNE FILE: VICARBRY CLICK TO PLAY RG apr96 |
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