bbc,

Remember Joe Offer has toured the public libraries of this great land getting Internet Access.

You might even try a Cyber Cafe although that doesn't sound very Midwestern.

Roger in Baltimore

WARNING!!! WHAT FOLLOWS IS NOT A FOLK SONG. IF YOU IGNORE IT, IT WON'T GO AWAY. BUT IT WILL SEEM LIKE IT WENT AWAY

Hopelessly Midwestern
by Joel Mabus

If you like life in the middle and not on the edge.
You're hopelessly Midwestern.
And if a big Saturday means cutting the hedge.
You're hopelessly Midwestern.
If you shop at Sears and drink a lot of iced tea,
Love to dance the polka and watch TV.
Then like it or not, you're a lot like me.

You're hopelessly Midwestern.

CHO:
Hopelessly Midwestern, corn-fed boys and girls.
Hopelessly Midwestern, square pegs in a big round world.
Well you can go from sea to shining sea,
But right in the middle thats the place to be.
The verdict is out and the jury agrees.
You're hopelessly Midwestern.

If you like your roads narrow and straight.
You're hopelessly Midwestern.
And if you still think sushi looks a lot like bait.
You're hopelessly Midwestern.
If you like Gerald Ford just as much as Betty,
And a big old cornfield looks mighty pretty,
And you'd rather go to hell then to New York City.
You're hopelessly Midwestern.

If annual rainfall is a real hot topic.
You're hopelessly Midwestern.
And if the Pocono Mountains sound kind of exotic.
You're hopelessly Midwestern.
If you like your potatoes mashed and your chicken fried,
Your green beans boiled and your apples pied.
And you ain't trusted nothin' since Rock Hudson died.
You're hopelessly Midwestern.

Enjoy the Midwest!

Roger in Baltimore