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User Name Thread Name Subject Posted
Bob Bolton BS: Lapsang Souchong (116* d) Lyr Add: BILLY OF TEA 13 Apr 00

G'day Again,

Phil jl:

Here are the words you requested of Enda Kenny's Song

Can't stand the stuff … I like to steer clear of grey areas.

Is it perfume? Is it tea?
Whatever it is it does nothing for me
Should I drink it? Or dab it on?
Can I swap it for a coffee or has all the water gone?

It is hot it is wet.
It is eau de toilette
Is it from the House of Lipton or Chanel?
I only want a cup of tea not this stuff you've given me
If you think I'm going to drink it go to

Help me
Someone call a doctor, call a nurse!
Call an ambulance I'm poisoned
And I think it's getting worse
I only wanted a cup of tea
But I fear that my last mouthful will be the death of me

It is hot it is wet
It is eau de toilette
To my mind it is more toilette than eau
If you want to spoil your day
Add the oil of Earl Grey
I'm reliably informed it's bergamot....

What a mouthful !
Is it perfume? Is it wee?
Whatever it's supposed to be it doesn't taste like tea
Should I drink it or dab it on?
Can I swap it for a coffee or has all the water gone?

It is hot it is wet
It is eau de toilette
Is it Twinings? Is it Tetley? Let me see
Go ahead make my day
But please don't make me drink Earl Grey
All I want is a proper cup of tea

While I am at it, here are the more 'modern' words to Billy of Tea (as sung by the Bushwackers, early 1970s.


You can talk of your whisky, talk of your beer,
There's something much nicer that's waiting us here,
It sits on the fire beneath the gum tree,
There's nothing much nicer than a billy of tea.

So fill up your tumbler as high as you can
And don't you dare tell me it's not the best plan,
You can let all your beer and your spirits go free
I'll stick to my darling old billy of tea.

I rise in the morning as soon as it's light
And go to the nose bag to see it's alright,
That the ants on the sugar no mortgage have got
And straight away sling my old black billy-pot.

And while it is boiling the horses I seek
And follow them down,, as far as the creek,)
I take off their hobbles and let them run free
Then haste to tuck into my billy of tea.

And at night when I camp if the day has been warm
I give to my horses their tucker of corn,
From the two in the pole to the one in the lead
A billy for each holds a comfortable feed.

Then the fire I make and the water I get
And corned beef and damper, in order.) I set,
But I don't touch the grub though so hungry I be –
I wait till it's ready-the billy of tea.

Their tune is a flattened out version of the first half of Bonnie Dundee, the original collected tune (from back when the 'folk' could still sing!).


Bob Bolton

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