Gest Q: I like your first translation better. More accurate if not more "poetic." Translating very idiomatic turns of phrase word-for word can give an absurd result. For example, "Gleich geht's los!" should not be translated "Equal goes it loose!" [Or in reverse, try "Du bist ein Zeimaler! Ich bin durch mit dir!"]That "bereite dir" sounds archaic, and I doubt very much "to thee now" really gives the meaning.
Jesus, now show me the way,
My saviour, choose the believing soul,
And look on me with grace.